Clips From TBTL #2609: Luke Burbank Edition

Luke: “Clean as yo Mama’s… forehead”

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Luke: “Did you herniate anything?”

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Luke: “I assume you hate it… and me, by extension”

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Luke: “I don’t dance now, I make money moves… Say I don’t gotta dance, I make money move… If I see you and I don’t speak, that means I don’t eff with you. I’m a boss, you a worker. I make bloody moves”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Little B, you can’t eff with me if you wanted to. These expensive, these is red bottoms. These is bloody shoes. Hit the store, I can get ’em both. I don’t wanna choose. And I’m quick, cut a bleep off. So don’t get comfortable”

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Luke: Loudly whispering “I was just there!”

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Luke: “Oh… What!!!?! Are… you… shitting me?”

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Luke: “Ooh!”

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Luke: Saying “The Ninja” as Sofía Vergara”

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Luke: Singing “I make money move!”

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Luke: Singing “These blood shoes… this a-Dutch bible”

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Luke: “So, good news everybody. I survived”

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Luke: “The show that just… might… be… too… beautiful… to live (¡Jalapeña!)”

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Luke: “Wayne’s Attic! Party time! Broken products!”

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Luke: “What!?”

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Luke: “What!!!?!”

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Luke: “You’re on notice, Wayne’s Attic!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Cut up a couple of jack pops? (I mean…) Jack pops!? Jack pops (Yeah, sure)”

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Luke and Andrew: “He is coming to… us today, for the first time… from his new studios in the Roosevelt neighborhood of Seattle, Washington… (It’s working! It’s working!) and, amazingly, it is working. He is Andrew Walsh and he joins us now. Hello, my dude! Hello, Luke; and, congratulations… on surviving”

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Luke and Andrew: “I highly recommend ‘The Sixth Sense.’ It’s a popular movie for a good reason… and, I don’t wanna spoil anything for you; but, I just wanna tell you… the kid did not get hit by the Chinese space station. Oh, goddamnit, Luke. I was, seriously, it was… in my Netflix queue”

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Luke and Andrew: “I make money move! Boy, (Yeah) things just got white… fast! (Wow)”

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Luke and Andrew: “My dearest old setup… My dearest MO-2… That was just a joke for you and Erik the Engineer. Oh, (Erik the Viking) he stopped listening years ago. (Yeah) I think you know that”

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Luke and Andrew: “Wayne’s Attic! Party time! Broken products! Ec–not ex…cellent… Not… Anyway”

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Clips From TBTL #2609: Andrew Walsh Edition

Andrew: “Because, I just don’t want the show to end. I really missed ya, buddy”

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Andrew: “Because, we handle our business, man!”

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Andrew: “Clup-clup, clup-clup”

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Andrew: “Drive!”

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Andrew: “Forget about it! Forget it, Luke”

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Andrew: “I blew it! Capisce?”

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Andrew: “I don’t have to justify myself to you”

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Andrew: “I’m not trying to… start some shit or something”

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Andrew: “I’ve been busy with the move and getting pissed on… Umm… by a cat!!”

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Andrew: “It’s the 3rd of April! I still have a broken piece of junk! It’s not a piece of junk. I’m sorry I said that. It’s a sweet machine that just… happens to not work”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Listeners, we do not know yet… whether or not Luke has been crushed by space junk”

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Andrew: “My cat pissed all over me”

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Andrew: “No… shit, man!”

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Andrew: “Oh, goddamnit, Luke”

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Andrew: “Oh, I don’t know! I feel like I have told a lot of goddamn boring stories on the show today”

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Andrew: “Ohh! Ooh!”

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Andrew: Singing “I make money moves”

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Andrew: Singing “Taxman!”

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Andrew: “So, I was able to just, like, load the shit out of that thing”

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Andrew: “What!? Are you serious? I feel like I nailed it”

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Andrew: “What!? Where!?”

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Andrew: “What!? Where!?” #2

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Andrew: “Yeah, that sounds… clean as a fiddle”

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Andrew: “You know it, baby”

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Andrew and Luke: “I’m so, so excited about this new setup. Everything just makes so much more sense here. I love it! (Okay)”

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Andrew and Luke: Laughing with Andrew saying “Anyway”

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Andrew and Luke: “You know what? I’m on MarsupialGurgle.com right now, looking at our archives… and, you know what, I said, you know what I said was, ‘Only idiots will listen to this music’. That’s what, now it’s coming back to me (Yeah) (Ooooh!)”

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Clips From TBTL #2608

Andrew: “Are you my mommy? Well, I’m not your mommy”

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Andrew: “Can I… could I admit something to you that I probably shouldn’t admit? I’m admitting something to both you and our dear friend, Phyllis Fletcher”

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Andrew: “I’m enjoying français!”

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Andrew: “Ooh, I just learned a new word”

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Andrew: “Ooh, I just learned a new word… where you winkled some WiFi… out of CBS, so you could… Genevieve taught me that word the other day. I’m gonna use it… way too much”

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Andrew: “P.J. McShooter Toots or McPooter Toots? I don’t…”

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Andrew: “Right now, you’re hearing me and I sound like a grumpy forty-one year old man… who used to smoke and has a smoker’s voice; and, also, thinks John Cougar Mellencamp is… sexy”

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Andrew: “Spoti-vvvvvvs!”

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Andrew: “You know, growing up as a suburban Ohio kid… who was used to the… McPooter Shoot treatment”

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Andrew and Luke: “Hey, have you just been… scouring the Internet looking for clips of me now? All of your drops, someday, it will be… goal, (Ooooh!) one hundred percent Andrew… in the drops. Yes… we’re trying to get to that. We’re trying to be… carbon neutral… and Andrew positive, if we can. As in, we want more Andrew-related drops than anything else on the show”

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Andrew and Luke: “I don’t think that happened. I don’t know what you’re talking about. Alright. Yeah, sorry. If I did it… If there had been a helicopter”

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Andrew and Luke: “Like, I felt like it was actually all sizzle, no steak. (Kind of thin) Or… mostly sizzle and no steak”

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Andrew and Luke: “Peace and love. Peace and love (Yes)”

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Luke: “But, you’re the only co-bro of the show”

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Luke: “Dude, I didn’t even want this picture; it’s for my brother David!”

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Luke: “He is joining us for the final time… the final time… from the… offices of Walsh, Walsh and Doormat in the Wallingford neighborhood of Seattle, Washington. He is Andrew (By Brenden!) Walsh”

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Luke: “Holy shit! Doug Baldwin?”

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Luke: “I bought the WiFi on the plane… Let’s be honest, C–CBS bought the WiFi on the plane”

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Luke: “Is there an easy, breezy… Cover Girl way?”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Nah, man!”

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Luke: “Peace and love to our… our listeners in… français… Would that mean our listeners in French?”

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Luke: “So, it’s just gonna be all this… (Ooooh!) all the time”

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Luke: “Somewhere north of French service, and south of… T.J. McPooter Tooters”

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Luke: “T.J. McPooter Shooters”

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Luke and Andrew: “Nailed the post, bro! (Nice)”

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Luke and Andrew: “Sit in there, kitty! Sit… sit in there, kitty!”

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Clips From TBTL #2607: Luke Burbank Edition

Luke: “Alright… let’s do some… some e-mailing and some v-mailing before my teeth completely fall out of my head”

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Luke: “And, I cried… I mean, I’m a mess up there”

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Luke: “Coming to you… possibly for the last time. Well, let’s be honest, probably… for the last time, from the… offices of Walsh, Walsh and Doormat… here in Wallingford neighborhood of Seattle, Washington”

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Luke: Cracking up a little after playing the “Ooooh!” drop while mentioning Hari Kondabolu being on the show

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Luke: “Dude… stop reading my tweets from four years ago”

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Luke: “Everything’s made up on This American Life, you guys. I’m sorry to tell ya”

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Luke: “Fine!”

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Luke: “Holy shit”

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Luke: “I was… crying secretly in the car the other day; driving… my wife and my niece… from one of my sister’s house… to my other sister’s house”

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Luke: “I’m in over my head, Walsh! I’m in over my head!”

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Luke: “I’m mad at you; but, when I get mad at you, it makes my teeth hurt more; so, I have to just… kind of keep it more calm. I have to try to keep my lips over my teeth”

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Luke: “I’m trying to misdirect!!”

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Luke: “I’ve got an update… on how much… tooth whitening gel is too much… tooth whitening gel… Spoiler alert: it’s however much I put in the… weird… mouthguard last night. Because, when my teeth are exposed to the ambient air… they hurt”

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Luke: “Oh, Behave”

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Luke: Saying “Will you be on Live Wire?” in a funny manner

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Luke: Singing his take on the opening notes of the “StoryCorps” intro

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Luke: “That hurt my teeth to laugh”

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Luke: “They can come and get it!”

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Luke: “Try to stop me”

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Luke: “Webster’s defines… lying as… what I’m doing right now”

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Luke: “What!!!?”

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Luke: “You get me on an airplane, and I’ll cry at any flipping movie”

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Luke and Andrew: “Alright. Well played… well played, sir (What do you mean?)”

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Luke and Andrew: “Clever girl (Oh, yeah)”

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Luke and Andrew: “Clever girl. Clever girl”

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Luke and Andrew: “Hey! Whose side are you on here!?! I’m a people!”

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Luke and Andrew: “I feel like… this… this audio drop… (Ooooh!) it’s like tofu, you can just put it in anything. I don’t hate it!! (Okay) I’m not being sarcastic!! (Okay, good)”

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Luke and Andrew: “I mean, if it was me… I would wait for their money to hit my account; and then, I would… Float it… I’d probably write a couple of checks against that… It’s called, ‘kiting'”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke isn’t sure if Andrew likes him playing the “Ooooh!” drop and compares it to tofu

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Luke and Andrew: “Okay, if you looked at my teeth right now… would you think… where would you put them on the average… whiteness spectrum? Umm, from heavenly… to Nicalert? Yes… it’s almost my first wife’s name, by the way… Heavenly. No.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Ooh. Ooh! Excuse me. Ooh! (Oh, ‘Explicit’!)”

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Luke and Andrew: “Wash, rinse and repeat (Mmm-hmm. Mmmkay)”

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Clips From TBTL #2607: Andrew and Hari Kondabolu Edition

Andrew: “Am I on a limb here by myself?”

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Andrew: “Anytime you play audio with my voice on it, it just strengthens the brand”

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Andrew: “CleverGirl.com”

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Andrew: Drawn out “Oh, boy”

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Andrew: “Hey, I gamed the system and I got a free Walkman!”

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Andrew: “I don’t know what to do!”

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Andrew: “I don’t know why you’d wanna do it!”

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Andrew: “I guess you cheated”

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Andrew: “I mean, that’s a pretty big, ballsy cheat”

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Andrew: “Not to turn this into Negative Town”

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Andrew: “O…kay”

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Andrew: “Ohh, that’s how it goes”

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Andrew: Saying “Cthulhu” in a funny manner

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Andrew: “Ship… the Sony back to this address!”

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Andrew: Skeptical sound

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Andrew: “Technically, I don’t know”

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Andrew and Hari Kondabolu: “Man… tell me everything about (Yes) having a billboard with your face on it. It’s the weirdest thing”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew accidentally said “Patsy Clan” instead of “Patsy Cline”

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Andrew and Luke: “Gimme, gimme… it’s a guy? Gimme his name… Well, no; then people will, it’ll get back to him… Yes, that’s why I want his name! Hey! Whose side are you on here!?! I’m a people!”

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Andrew and Luke: “I mean, not to be an egomaniac about it (Mmm-hmm)”

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Andrew and Luke: “I was legit bummed (Yeah, you were)”

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Andrew and Luke: “My cassette tapes are in the other room watching Russian car crashes… Alright. Different uncle!! (Okay. Sorry) I got a lot of crazy uncles”

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Andrew and Luke: “(Oh, ‘Explicit’) Ooh! Ooh!”

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Andrew and Luke: “What if it, what if it turned out… (If you saw my teeth…) I’ve… poisoning your teeth… just so that you don’t holler at me. It’s an effective strategy”

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Hari Kondabolu: “I get free coffee here!”

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Hari Kondabolu: “I’m larger than life! I’m literally larger than life”

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Hari Kondabolu: “My brother, I realized, does not give a shit”

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Hari Kondabolu: “Oh my God, yeah”

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Hari Kondabolu, Luke and Andrew: “Oh… I mean, Das Racist broke up three years ago, thank God. Thank God? What!? Why do you say that? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, God. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, God… I didn’t like the whole him being more famous thing”

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Clips From TBTL #2606: Luke Burbank Edition

Luke: “Agent!!!”

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Luke: “Forty-two? Lewis! Forty-two feels weird to me. I don’t know why”

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Luke: “Have we out-gated ourselves”

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Luke: “I didn’t choose the drop life; the drop life chose me”

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Luke: “I know that’s a lot of Ms, dude”

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Luke: “I was all torqued up about the fact that my printer… wouldn’t work”

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Luke: “If you think he’s, like… the swinginest… swingle in town… he’s not. He’s the inventinest… inventor in town”

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Luke: Imitating a jack in the box exploding

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Luke: “No friggin’… S, Sherlock!”

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Luke: Saying “I never put that together!” in a high-pitched voice

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Luke: Snickering and laughing

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Luke: “So, don’t come a-knockin’ people; cuz, you will be on camera. Smile! You’re on camera”

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Luke: “Thanks, Obama!”

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Luke: “That’s my idea of hell”

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Luke: “Then… there are other Pixies songs… that I honestly wouldn’t piss on if they were on fire”

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Luke: “They wouldn’t shut up about the app!”

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Luke: “Uggh!”

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Luke: “Usually, hidden somewhere in that whole situation… is a little… dealeo of dressing. A little, a little somethin’ somethin’ for ya”

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Luke: “What of you!!”

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Luke: “Who do you think you are!?”

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Luke: “Woohoo!”

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Luke: “Yeah; but, that’s a dog whistle!”

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Luke and Andrew: “I was almost like a real boy (Oh, wow) again”

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Luke and Andrew: Reading a portion of the FTC’s site in Spanish and Andrew asks him to jump to the part about Burger King

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Luke and Andrew: “This thing grew to its normal size. It’s heart grew five times… And… also, I don’t know why they have Grinch heart… in these salads… but, it’s Whole Foods… Hearts of Grinch, is what it’s called. Hearts of Grinch (That’s a pretty good spoof)”

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Luke and Andrew: “What a view! What a view! Hubba-hubba!”

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Luke and Andrew: “What of you, listener Dennis? What of you, listener Dennis!?”

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Luke and Andrew: “You wanna know the real truth? Yaeh”

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