Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2725

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Andrew: “Alright… let’s just do this. Let’s start the show on a very awkward note”

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Andrew: “Ha-ha-ha. I don’t need a water bottle”

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Andrew: “Hey, Bubbie!”

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Andrew: “Holy shit… I forgot about this toy. I used to have this toy”

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Andrew: “How dare you say I’m stupid, E!”

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Andrew: “I actually like having one water bottle; because, maybe some day… this will go out of use and I’ll… I’ll be moving apartments, and I’ll find this buried in a box somewhere. And, I’ll be like, ‘Ahhh. Remember the great… water bottle of 2018?’ And, I’ll take it out, and I’ll cradle it, and I’ll talk to it… Got a little bit weird at the end”

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Andrew: “I didn’t know what I was gonna say until I opened my mouth”

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Andrew: “I got Wi-Fi for it. It’s now a Wi-Fi water bottle”

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Andrew: “I wanted to say something about music”

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Andrew: “I’m done with this!”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Numb hands”

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Andrew: Singing “I shouldn’t be singing on the show”

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Andrew: Singing “Oh… Sherrie… Hold on!”

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Andrew: “There… we got there!”

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Andrew: “We can’t go out with it; because… every word in it is terrible”

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Andrew: “Whoa… There is a whole ‘nother world of music out there”

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Andrew: “Why didn’t anybody… tell me about water bottles!? I love it!”

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Andrew: “Yeah… I guess so”

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Andrew: “You see a red canteen; and, then, you wanted paint it black [sic]“

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Luke: “But, I, but, I regret nothing!”

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Luke: “Don’t ask Bubbie”

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Luke: “Don’t you forget about us. Don’t, don’t, don’t… don’t… don’t you… forget about us”

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Luke: “I’m such a Moishe Kapoydah! [sic]“

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Luke: “Is this gonna hurt my back?”

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Luke: “My board be crazy”

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Luke: Saying “The horror” in a funny manner

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Luke: Singing “Oh, Andrew… hold on!”

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Luke: Singing the melody to “Paint It Black” and saying “Shut up”

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Luke: “Try to get that a little… get… get that… a, a Live Wire-slash-TB–I just called TBTL, ‘Live Wire'”

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Luke and Andrew: “And then, I try to sorta joke it… joke it off, as it were… You’ll go blind!”

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Luke and Andrew: The possibility of calling Live Wire “TBTL” on stage and joking it off

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Luke and Andrew: “What were you saying, though, before I interrupted you with my hilarious spoof? (Ahhh, nothing)”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2724: No Point Conversion

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Andrew: “Are we ‘Yay! Undefeated!’ or, are we ‘Shit! Still winless’?”

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Andrew: “Can I tell you the gross part of this story?”

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Andrew: “I, I dunno. I’m all over the place”

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Andrew: “I’m just speaking obviously now”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Man… I just love that I get to study under you”

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Andrew: “Oh my God. We are going to win this game”

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Andrew: “Oh, shit. They’re playing in a fucking downpour, like, the entire game”

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Andrew: Singing “Ba-dum-ba-dum”

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Andrew: “The next time I move, all I want is a washing machine and dryer!”

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Andrew: “The sweat that I sweated out during that game… was like battery acid”

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Andrew: “These are mah Browns!! Ruff, ruff, ruff!”

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Andrew: “This is a terrible analogy. I wish I could think of something sharper”

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Andrew and Luke: “Can I tell you the gross part of this story? Yeah. It’s… it’s not terribly gross; but… it is bodily”

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Andrew and Luke: Music coming out of Luke’s system sounded blown out, as if he had a dirty knob or something

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Luke: “Everybody’s always friggin’ hurt!”

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Luke: “I guess I’m… I’m, I’m cautiously pessimistic”

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Luke: “Let’s… talk… Browns”

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Luke: Saying “Okay. I guess we lose again” in a funny manner

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Luke: “Seahawks at Bears Monday night… I don’t think we’re gonna win. I hope I’m wrong… I hope that I’m wrong”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2724

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Andrew: “Hello, Luke… Got some weird smells wafting into my window today”

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Andrew: “I’m what they call a… glutton”

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Andrew: “Just get to the… part where you paint each other naked!”

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Andrew: “Let’s power out of that!”

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Andrew: “Oh my God! I got so many things I wanna talk to you about”

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Andrew: Singing “Bum… bum-bum”

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Andrew: “That’s unpleasant”

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Andrew: “This will discredit me if you wanna discredit me”

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Andrew: “Well, I’m glad we were able to avoid that, altogether”

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Andrew: “What is going on? This is crazy!”

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Andrew: “What’s the chance that we have somebody whose last name is ‘Butts’. I want that one”

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Andrew: “You now have to shovel poop on Mars”

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Andrew and Luke: “Andrew Walsh would like to exercise his Constitutional rights to not answer that question (Ha!)”

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Carey Burbank: “I’m getting out!”

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Carey Burbank: “No, thank you. No!”

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Carey Burbank: “Okay, cool. So, you guys are… fear-shaming me”

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Carey Burbank: “There’s an arm!”

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Carey Burbank: “What… the hell was that?”

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Carey Burbank and Andrew: “Bye, Andrew. Bye! I’m glad you’re alive”

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Carey Burbank, Andrew and Luke: “Andrew… if you put yourself in that situation, you, kind of, imagine those circumstances. What’s, what’s… Andrew… Walsh’s reaction… in this situation? Andrew Walsh would like to exercise his Constitutional rights to not answer that question (Ha!)”

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Luke: “Again, it’s mostly out of… pizza self-denial, I guess”

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Luke: “Carey and I had a little bit of a… (That’s my woife!) we had a… adventure on the high sea… over the weekend… that was… sorta terrifying actually… Well, for one of us in the couple”

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Luke: “Conor Mulcahy!”

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Luke: “I dunno. I’m just, it’s [sic] hurts me, it hurts me to know that you trust a Jon Ryan look-alike more than you trust your own husband”

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Luke: “I know people, who know people… who know Carey Burbank (That’s my woife!)”

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Luke: “I’m not responsible for that”

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Luke: “It’s not Mr. Unlimited”

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Luke: “Message to all crew members… remain calm!”

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Luke: “Ooh, Round Table!!”

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Luke: “Ooh!”

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Luke: “Papa John Schnatter of the Papa Murphy’s chain”

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Luke: Singing “Yakety Sax”

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Luke: “They’re already dead and they don’t know it!”

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Luke: “This is what all of the hype is about!?”

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Luke: “What last bit of credibility I had with my wife, I lost that night”

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Luke: “You poor sons of bitches. You don’t even know how hosed you are”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke aborts an attempt at doing an Australian Marlon Brando and Andrew wants out power out from that

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Luke and Andrew: Luke doing a bad Marlon Brando “The Godfather” impression while Andrew was talking

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Luke and Carey Burbank: “Do I get some points, Carey Beth… for saying everything was gonna be okay; because, in this case, everything was okay? Do I win back any of the… any of the credibility that I’ve lost over the course of our relationship? I guess it’s only fair”

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Luke, Carey Burbank and Andrew: Overlap comforting and Carey landing a good burn on Luke

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2723

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Andrew: “And then, he says… ‘Bless you, son. What are your sins?'”

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Andrew: “Boop-boop-boop!”

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Andrew: “Boop-boop-boop!” #2

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Andrew: “Boy, I’m having a day”

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Andrew: “Dial ‘M’ for Arborist”

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Andrew: “I do think it’s kinda word salad”

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Andrew: “I haven’t been proud of many things in my life; but, I am very proud of this Photoshop”

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Andrew: “I just found Paul McCartney to be just so… smug, and egotistical, and think he’s still cheeky, and ‘Boop-boop-boop!’… That’s my imitation of him, apparently. Boop-boop-boop!”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Oh, damn! I thought it was gonna be roosters”

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Andrew: Saying “I wanna put my evil inside of you” with a robotic voice

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Andrew: “She reminds me of my friend Rosen a little bit. She’s just kind of like… goofy… and… dances weird. I don’t know if… I have no idea if Rosen dances weird”

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Andrew: “Should I even bring it up? Should I poison other people with the poison thoughts I’ve been having?”

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Andrew: Singing the intro bit from The Beatles’ “Come Together”

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Andrew: Trying to come up with a word to describe a nostalgic feeling when listening to a song

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Andrew: “You aren’t gonna get any shit from me on that”

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Andrew and Luke: “Should I even bring it up? Should I poison other people with the poison thoughts I’ve been having? Should you put your evil inside them?”

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Luke: “And, of course, he wouldn’t tell me what ‘toe jam football’ is. I mean, you know what else? Forget John Lennon!”

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Luke: “Happy Cock-tober”

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Luke: “I am feeling… very… very… good… on this Friday”

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Luke: “I’m Digger! I’m a dermatophyte!”

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Luke: “I’m either doing great or suffering from… crippling depression”

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Luke: “That’s not for you, my friend, Andrew”

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Luke: “What the fuck is she supposed to do?”

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Luke: “Yeah, what do you call that, Stu? Play the Top Story sound effect… don’t do the Top Story… and, then, do the e-mails”

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Luke and Andrew: “America’s… Commercial’s Got Talent Got Dance? America’s Kids Got Singing”

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Luke and Andrew: If Luke had to eat any kind of poop, it would be horse poop

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Luke and Andrew: “What is a ‘toe jam football’… (Don’t) as in, The Beatles’ song ‘Come Together'”

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Luke and Andrew: “You wanna talk about… you wanna talk about some cuckoo, bananas lyrics (Yeah?)”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2722

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Andrew: “A jolly old man and everybody should be loving my shit”

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Andrew: “And, the truth of the matter is… No!”

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Andrew: “Are, are we in, are we in fun times now?”

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Andrew: “Can I play some tape? I don’t know why I’m doing this at the beginning of the show”

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Andrew: “Hey! Nice dress”

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Andrew: “I don’t know what you’re talking about”

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Andrew: “I know!”

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Andrew: “It’s just an old… man, stupid shit thing to say”

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Andrew: “Just another technical foul for Walsh here”

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “I love that!”

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Andrew: “No!”

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Andrew: “Oh, God… Why do I keep on… saying stuff like this today?”

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Andrew: “Question mark, exclamation point. Question mark, exclamation point”

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Andrew: “Quick reminder; cuz, it’s always fun to start a Blursday segment… with… finger-wagging and rules-reminding”

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Andrew: Saying “Hey, you guys should be going the other way!” in a funny manner

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Andrew: “Sharon, get your priorities straight!”

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: “That’s a really charming story”

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Andrew: “They’re not making shit, man!”

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Andrew: “Very quickly, only cuz I was stumbling and fumbling about”

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Andrew: “Wait a second. Don’t do this to yourself”

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Andrew: “Well, I have some really disturbing news for you”

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Andrew: “You know, it is a word”

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Andrew: “You’re looking for something. I know that sound. I know that hesitation… That’s not you trying to think of something to say; that’s you looking for audio”

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Luke: “Don’t get… cocky”

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Luke: “Everything’s coming up Cleveland!”

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Luke: “Get off my back, Hayes!!”

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Luke: Giggling

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Luke: “Give me the Cleve-deets”

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Luke: “Hey, can we play the next neutral game in Portland?”

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Luke: “Holy S!!”

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Luke: “I don’t have the self-control to be left… alone… with a giant container of, of mixed nuts”

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Luke: “I’m regretting saying this even before I’ve said it”

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Luke: “‘It’s better to have loved than lost’ I’m like, ‘Eff that!'”

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Luke: “Just Googling… good… and bad… nuts… for dogs”

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Luke: “My parents… were… you know… were short on cash and long on children”

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Luke: “Not to take it back to Amway-town”

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Luke: “Oh, man. This is not gonna end well. Stop it, Luke. Don’t do it. What are you doing? Why are you going this?”

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Luke: Saying “Why is everyone so sad?” in an obnoxious manner

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Luke and Andrew: “Happy Blursday! Happy Blursday! You’ll never be happy again”

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Luke and Andrew: “He’s getting cut in half like a woman in a magic show! Mmm-hmm”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2721

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Andrew: “And, that’s the end of my story”

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Andrew: “Are you… shitting me?”

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Andrew: Barking

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Andrew: “Could you guys talk about Browns rock songs some more?”

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Andrew: “Dog pound!”

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Andrew: Giggling funny

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Andrew: Giggling funny #2

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Andrew: Giggling funny and saying “That’s so creepy when I try to do a child’s laugh. That’s awful”

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Andrew: “God! What am I doing? I’m just getting dumber… I’m literally getting dumber by the day… That’s not how I’m supposed to be going through this life”

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Andrew: “Hey, man. I just had a weird thought… Kinda weird. Not weird. Actually, probably more of a thought that’s… a bad way to start the show”

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Andrew: “I don’t know if that… imprints on you like it imprints on me”

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Andrew: “Maybe, I’m just about to describe… the feeling of being smug; I hope that’s not it”

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Andrew: “Oh my God!”

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Andrew: “Oh, look at us… rich people… I didn’t know we were so… rich”

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Andrew: “Okay; but, it’s… jazz”

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Andrew: Quietly saying “Oh my God. I can’t even podcast like this”

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Andrew: Singing “Dog pound! Dog pound!”

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Andrew: “That… as you can imagine… drove my brain… insane”

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Andrew: “The Browns are a really good team!”

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Andrew: “You don’t… mess around with the Illuminati! You don’t joke about that!”

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Andrew: “You’re racist against yourself!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Like, what is (Yeah) wrong with us!?”

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Luke: “I’ll stop that right now”

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Luke: “I’m telling you, man. You think things aren’t related. You don’t believe in synchronicity, bro”

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Luke: “It was rough, McGruff”

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Luke: “Maybe he was… loud and proud about this”

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Luke: “My name is Luke Burbank. I’m your… well-hydrated host (Hello, everyone!)”

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Luke: “Oh my gosh. That’s… I mean, that’s… that’s borderline erotic”

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Luke: “Okay. Let me just… take a sip of… creative juice… It’s not code for… alcohol”

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Luke: “Self-loathe much?”

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Luke: Singing “Take a molly like communion” and making a chicken clucking sound

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Luke: “Yah, yah!”

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Luke and Andrew: “I know this is incredibly specific… maybe too loud and definitely too specific (Mmm-hmm)”

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