Clips From TBTL #2661

Andrew: “And, sure as shit”

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Andrew: “Aw, shit. I’m in a trap!”

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Andrew: “Do you wanna go out with Cherry Poppin’ Daddies? Just kidding”

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Andrew: “Get behind me, daemon”

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Andrew: “God! Like, this is from the moon”

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Andrew: “Hi… I’m an astronaut. Here’s some moon dust”

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Andrew: “I can’t deny it… any longer”

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Andrew: “I don’t even know if you’re supposed to say it out loud”

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Andrew: “I’ll tell you what, I’m gonna turn ’em all into rolling fart lockers. That’s my brand… and, I’m not giving it up just cuz it’s somebody else’s car”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing #2

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Andrew: Making funny sounds

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Andrew: “Oh, shit. Is that what we’re doing next year?”

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Andrew: “Oh!”

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Andrew: “See, that’s the thing. Growing up, I liked the weirdest shit!”

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Andrew: Singing four notes

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Andrew: Singing four notes and saying “That’s not a great imitation of that song; but, it’s more fodder for Marsupial Gurgle”

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Andrew: “Ya happy now, Walsh? Ya killed a drop”

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Andrew: “You know, he’s just a Steelers… wanker”

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Andrew and Luke: “It’s perseverance raccoonified (Perseverance raccoonified!)”

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Luke: “I have… taken… shits in bus stations that I’ve given more thought and care to than John Clayton does… his… show promos”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: Making funny mouth sounds

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Luke: “Mmm, it’s not really working”

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Luke: “MPR raccoon made it, motherfuckers!”

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Luke: Singing “C-I-C-C-O, C-I-C-C-O”

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Luke: Singing “Proliance Surgeons”

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Luke: “WW..RRD… What would Rhonda the Raccoon Do?”

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Clips From TBTL #2660

Andrew: “And, now, I really wished I had… listened to this; cuz, now, I’m, like, trying to weigh in on a thing I didn’t hear! Yay!”

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Andrew: “Excuse the abusive language… Mr. Sean DeTore”

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Andrew: “Hey, hey!”

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Andrew: “I believe it’s, ‘Oui se puede’… I don’t know why I made that joke. It’s was like a French/Spanish thing? I don’t know. Whatever. I’m just trying. I’m just trying out here”

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Andrew: “I kinda went down when I shoulda gone high!”

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Andrew: “I think it’s dumb”

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Andrew: “I think it’s dumb. I think what I wrote is dumb”

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Andrew: “I’m loving NPR [sic] raccoon!”

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Andrew: “McBama”

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Andrew: “Oh, boy!”

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Andrew: “Oh, mark it eight, Walsh!”

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Andrew: “Okay. That’s good; because, I’m actually super chill bro about it”

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Andrew: “Oui se puede”

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Andrew: “Pump it down!”

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Andrew: Saying “I wanna be sliding down the walls” in a funny manner

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Andrew: “Shut up, Mike Frizzell”

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Andrew: Singing “Rocky… broke as balls”

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Andrew: Singing “Take me to your best friend’s house”

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Andrew: “That was the sound of my brain breaking”

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Andrew and Luke: “Come on, old man! Get with the times! We’re a podcast. We like to joke in (Yeah) our auto-responses, and they’re usually hilarious (Yeah)”

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Andrew and Luke: Luke asked for a clip of Andrew saying something funny, but says it even funnier, which can lead to both of them playing each other’s clip at each other

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Luke: “A hack attack”

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Luke: “But, he can also be, kind of, a brittle dick”

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Luke: “Do you support Hussein McBama?”

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Luke: “Howard Schultz is just such a fucking tool!”

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Luke: “I come in peace”

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Luke: “I’m just kind of a basket case right now”

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Luke: “I’m trying to talk about a thing… I didn’t read… Yay!”

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Luke: “It’s TBTL. Don’t go anywhere. Fight your instincts… don’t go anywhere”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “My goodness gracious, Andrew. I am going to be, it is gonna be like… a mountain of emotional cocaine… for me… I am gonna be”

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Luke: “Sí se puede”

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Luke: “Take that, Luke from six minutes ago! Sí se puede”

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Luke: “The Grump-splorers of Planet Negatron?”

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Luke: “Things are hard”

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Luke: “We had, we had escaped the gravitational pull… of planet Negatron… and, then, suddenly I sucked back in, Andrew. Why did I get sucked back in?”

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Luke: “We’re crossing our fingers for a miracle on this one. We’ll see what happens”

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Luke: “Who wants to party, man?”

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Luke: “You wanna go faster?”

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Luke: “You want me to pump it down? I’ll pump it down a million times!”

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Luke and Andrew: Going faster, but maybe not so fast

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Luke and Andrew: “I don’t feel like this is getting the nose up. I know”

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Clips From TBTL #2659

Andrew: “But, in this one, my head was really a foot!”

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Andrew: “By hook or by crook”

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Andrew: “Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo!”

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Andrew: “Five thousand dollars!? No. My, God! No”

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Andrew: “Go up, you bald head… Go up, you bald head”

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Andrew: “I already feel so batshit about everything”

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Andrew: “I am, I am honored”

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Andrew: “I don’t think that the baldness is the leading problem with me”

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Andrew: “I have, I have a million, million insecurities; but, that’s not one of ’em”

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Andrew: “I think it’s good content”

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Andrew: “I was about to say, ‘I just read that somewhere.’ Yeah… in this article that we’re talking about!”

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Andrew: “It’s not the best… but, it’s not the worst… Like, honestly…”

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Andrew: “Just grow up! Ya big babies”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing #2

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “That’s awful”

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Andrew: “No, no, I’m just like Marshall Mathers. This is just a character I play… You know, the Andrew you hear on TBTL is like the Eminem… whereas, the real Andrew is just a real chill guy… doesn’t have a lotta worries… just, kind of, like to kick it, hang out with people a lot… That’s the real me”

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Andrew: “No. Get out of my house. Who are you? Why are you in my house?”

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Andrew: “Oh, God, no”

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Andrew: “Oh, God, yeah”

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Andrew: “Oh, shit!”

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Andrew: “Oh, yeah!”

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Andrew: “Solitary is no friend of yours”

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Andrew: “That is so crude… Such a crude, crude way to introduce me… as nothing more than a farting machine… My goodness, can we do better on a Monday afternoon?”

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Andrew: “Waking up. Working. Going to sleep, dreaming about work”

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Andrew: “We’re gonna bring nudes back. Turns out, people like to look at naked ladies”

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Andrew: “You and I recorded… literally four hours of hot dog tape the other day. Yeah, we’ve got… four hours of hot dog stories in us”

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Luke: “Consinue or Continder”

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Luke: Fumbled the word “Continue” by saying “Consinue” and “Continder”

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Luke: “Kreiger!!”

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Luke: “Laughing so hard, you’re crying and your face is on sideways”

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Luke: “Maybe the listeners will remember. I sure don’t”

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Luke: “So, maybe it… maybe it just would be whack-a-mole… with my insecurities”

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Luke: “That was… honestly, probably one of the better parts of the show; and, I don’t mean that as a compliment”

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Luke and Andrew: “Isn’t it ironic? Don’t you think? God”

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Luke and Andrew: “Now, if it was… full head of hair; but, I would have to have a rat tail… I would take it… That’s awful”

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Clips From TBTL #2658

Andrew: “Are you sure?”

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Andrew: “Does anybody want a pancake… daddy?”

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Andrew: “God! I know this is the wrong time to be asking about new projects for TBTL; as, we have a lot of stuff on our plate”

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Andrew: “Here’s another thing too… you, you know, depending on how our relationship is going, Luke”

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Andrew: “Hey, there. I feel like you’re really rushing my intro. I don’t even know… I take it that you cannot hear my anymore. Have you stepped away from the microphone? Sounds like you have”

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Andrew: “Hotmail!”

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Andrew: “I like podcasts!”

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Andrew: “I… the only thing that I think… we should do now is to get a dog named Boo… Luke… Me and you, and a dog named Boo!”

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Andrew: “I’ve been… Postmates curious for a while now”

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Andrew: “Oh, I got a helmet!”

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Andrew: “See, I like that”

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Andrew: “Wait. Was it Pancake Daddy?”

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Andrew: “Well, I’ll tell you what. The video is… naughty!”

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Andrew: “Wow… what a grift”

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Andrew: “You… listen to your Pancake Daddy!!”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew says “Pancake Daddy” again and Luke says if Andrew keeps on saying “Daddy” that they will have to start traveling separately

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew sort of not asking me to send him a clip of Luke doing an impression of a rock ‘n’ roll Anthony Bourdain walking into a room

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Andrew and Luke: “Do you have anything that says ‘Pancake Daddy’ or ‘Daddy Love Pancakes’? I’m sorry, the line’s breaking up. I can’t hear you… I’m sorry, Andrew. We’ll just have to end this here. Great show… Have a great Friday, everybody”

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Andrew and Luke: “Me and you and a dog named Roo?!? My name’s Roo… How do you do!?”

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Andrew and Luke: “Oh, no! I’m not trying to call AJ Keen! Oh, geez. Butt dial. Oh, again. (Butt dial) Oh, again”

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Andrew and Luke: “What would Rodney Dangerfield Jesus sound like, coming into a room, Luke? Oh, man. Never mind. (I’m not gonna give…) Don’t do it. I’m not gonna give you another thing to have Linh… (I’m asking as a friend) excerpt from the show”

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Andrew and Luke: “You… listen to your Pancake Daddy!! Oh… God have mercy!”

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Luke: “And, I’ve gone to extraordinary… you could only say, Trumpian… esque lengths”

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Luke: “I don’t know, man”

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Luke: “I’m really the Wimpy… of the… of the Starbucks on Monroe Avenue here in Chicago”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Linh, you can do it… It’s okay”

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Luke: “Oh, my goodness gracious. I think that the coffee is here”

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Luke: “We are gonna turn your TV into a computer”

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Luke: “We don’t do dirty stuff here”

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Luke: “Wha… how is, how… What!?”

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Luke: “Yeah! Eff everybody here; because, I’m Bourdain. And, like, I’m taking no prisoners… Now… somebody give me a… pig colon to eat!”

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Luke and Andrew: “And then, my Mom and Dad are having their Fortieth wedding anniversary… (Oh yeah?) party on Sunday; it’s a big blowout… Well, here’s the messed up thing, Andrew… I’m forty-two… How does that work?”

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Luke and Andrew: “But, everybody was acting like it meant something. You know, also, that’s a pretty good description for TBTL. Yeah… similar”

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Luke and Andrew: “I’m making pancakes like a real daddy… and… Oh, Daddy loves pancakes!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Wouldn’t it be hilarious if we got killed by a listeners? Ha!! It would… probably someone who… is sick of hearing that Tom Cochrane song!”

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Luke and Andrew: “You guys are not from this planet (Right)”

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Clips From TBTL #2657

Andrew: “And, I dunno know why, I dunno know why I need to go to Negative Town”

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Andrew: “I believe the hamburgers are made of pooter meat… The taste that’s strangely familiar”

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Andrew: “I don’t know!!”

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Andrew: “I still got the Camaro!”

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Andrew: “I’m… I’m… real saucy drunk”

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Andrew: “It’s Tim Van Meredith”

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Andrew: “Lock in your thetans for life”

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Andrew: “Oh my God!!”

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Andrew: “Why did you do that? I hate you, Chris Hayes! Ahh, I used to love you!”

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Andrew: “You’re gonna get one crank in there?”

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Andrew and Luke: “Better! Worse! Better! Worse! I don’t know!! (‘kay) I don’t know”

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Andrew and Luke: “Cochrane, Cochrane, Cochrane. Hey, does this… does, does my Tom Cochrane look normal to you? Could you just take a look at this real quick?”

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Andrew and Luke: “Hey, Luke. Yo. The collars are fine. Move on”

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Luke: “Again, I understand… that in the world, worse things are happening… even as we speak”

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Luke: “Easy, Bunnicula”

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Luke: “Everybody in the car!!!”

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Luke: “I can’t believe he just made that joke”

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Luke: “I love you, Alaska Airlines; but, you’re bringing me down”

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Luke: “I remember nothing from the show; but, it sounds like a thing we would do”

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Luke: “I’m gonna be… quite something on the video this week”

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Luke: “It is a minor miracle… that I’m even here today… because, of the SkyJinx… Ooh… (Ooooh!) that I put up with”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: Laughing #2

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Luke: “Lock in your thetans… and overcome your engrams”

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Luke: “Oh, the traffic was horrible!”

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Luke: “Oh, this is getting way too baseball-y… way too fast”

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Luke: “Oof”

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Luke: “Oooh!”

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Luke: “She, kind of, seriously boned him”

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Luke: Singing “Bad, bad husbandry”

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Luke: Singing “Shorty!”

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Luke: “Team Burbank”

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Luke: “That sounds right”

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Luke: “That was, like… honestly, the most… poopy pants, whiny, complainy story”

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Luke: “There has to be an air hole… out of this… out of this nightmare that is waiting in line like a normal person”

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Luke and Andrew: “I don’t have my Cochrane on the ready. Eww, that sounds dirty. Easy!”

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Luke and Andrew: “I have an imaginary friend who takes over my body. His name is ‘Alcohol’… And, he’s not imaginary. No, he is not! I’ve met him… I’ve met him”

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Luke and Andrew: “I swerve on heroin… Oh, good”

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Luke and Andrew: “I’m in the fun! I’m in the fun part… Here come the consequences. It’s called a break”

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Luke and Andrew: Singing “Bad, bad husbandry! Well, I’m thinking bad husbandry is what I got. Uh, huh, huh (Whoa, whoa, whoa)”

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Clips From TBTL #2656: Luke Burbank Edition

Luke: “Ah, it’s just some bullshit. Whatever”

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Luke: “An epoophany”

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Luke: “Can I box that up for you?”

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Luke: Cute laugh

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Luke: “Eff this!!”

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Luke: “FML… I’ll take one of everything”

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Luke: “He drives an ice cream truck covered in skulls. To Bill Brasky!!!”

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Luke: “I don’t have a lot of jokes in me”

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Luke: “I weigh too much!!”

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Luke: “I’ll, I’ll, I’ll, I’ll… I’ll shoot you straight here, my friend”

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Luke: “I’m at Applebee’s!”

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Luke: “If you just wanted to know the whitest thing that’s ever happened, I think it just occurred here in Bellingham, Washington”

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Luke: “Man, oh, man, Andrew! I had a wonderful time!”

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Luke: “OMG. WTF. Why the face?”

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Luke: “Poop talk”

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Luke: Saying “Listenable” over Russell Wilson saying “Mr. Unlimited”

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Luke: Saying “Ya…you broke it, you bought it. Sorry” in a sing-songy manner

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Luke: “Speaking of… weirdos”

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Luke: “That story was written by listener Tim!”

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Luke: “That’s on a different knob now”

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Luke: “The TBTL-a-Thon… TBTL IX… Thumbs Up for TBTL… Life Might be a Highway Edition”

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Luke: “Well! Oh my goodness. Hello. Hi, everybody… Are you picking up what I am putting down? Can you hear me… America… and parts of Tokyo”

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Luke: “What… can I do to be one of the… old people who doesn’t… seem to just… really hate being alive?”

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Luke and Andrew: Getting mentioned, again, as the unpaid audio producer and Luke playing several clips, including one he requested, sent to him

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Luke and Andrew: Luke discussing his fall while jogging and how he, and TBTL as a podcast, is getting old and middle-aged

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Luke and Andrew: “One of these days… Oh, man, Andrew… Take a note!! Mmmkay”

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Luke and Andrew: “Shots fired. Shots… (Shots fired) fired”

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Luke and Andrew: “Sorry, sorry I kept delaying the start of the show; which is, of course… especially ironic, because I’m the one who also… has, as they say, a ‘hard out’… I have a… Ahn [ph] in my name… Anders. Easy. I have to… go get on an airplane. I’m going to Chicago, doing Wait Wait… Don’t Tell Me!… tomorrow”

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Luke and Andrew: “That’s all the work of unpaid… audio producer Linh Pham right there. No! It’s, like, every day… just get a few… little gems… That last is so bad. I hate… I hate you asking him to take that. And, you know what? Linh, I know you’re just following orders, but you share some of the responsibility, my friend”

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Luke and Andrew: “This sounds a bit corny; but… you know, I’m thinking good thoughts for you, man. Because, I don’t, I don’t like to know that my longest running co-bro and very good friend is… is feeling… bad feelings coursing through them. So, I was, I was really… glad that you shared that with everybody. I did not think you were a weirdo… Oh, I was talking about the mascot talk… Just kidding… Thank you… Keep deflecting. That’s fine. If that’s what you need to do… like a weirdo; if that’s what you need to do… that’s fine. I don’t even know if we had mascot talk”

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Luke and Andrew: “You’re crazy for this one, Walsh. Hmm-hmm”

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