Day: July 25, 2020

Andrew: “Do you wanna hear a sort… a sort of sad breakfast story today?”

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Andrew: “Eh, fuck the truth. We just wanna write fantasy about this guy”

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Andrew: “I did at some point; but, I do not now”

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Andrew: “I didn’t have the sound up; because, I didn’t want my head to explode”

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Andrew: “I said ‘basement’ a lot in that sentence”

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Andrew: “I’ll get back to you on Monday. I’ll forget”

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “Why am I doing this?”

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Andrew: “Mascots are always weird”

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Andrew: “Mmmm!!!”

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Andrew: Saying “Booming announcer” in a booming voice

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Andrew: “She’s just dirty”

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Andrew: “She’s just dirty!”

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Andrew: Singing a drawn out “We”

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Andrew: Singing a very small portion of Will Smith’s “Gettin’ Jiggy wit it”

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Andrew: “They call them, ‘JUGs’. I think I’ve told you this: Justice Under God”

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Andrew: “Yeah… exactly… Those abs… Sorry. Just thinking about those abs”

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Andrew: “You get five demerits for being off-campus… five for smoking… You get ten, that’s an automatic Saturday”

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Andrew and Luke: “Don’t make me do it; (Yeah) cuz, I know it’ll come back to get me”

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Andrew and Luke: “Not a stick in the mud! A responsible journalist. Because, that’s what… (Fair) that’s what I am?!?”

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Andrew and Luke: “Sorry for that noise I made. I was drinking coffee; but, (No, no…) I am surprised! Believe me, that’s, that’s not the (That’s a gift) last time… that is not the last time people are gonna hear that… sound on this show (Aw, shit. I quit)”

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Luke: Attempting to recite lyrics from DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince’s “Summertime” from memory

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Luke: “Baseball’s back, baby”

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Luke: “I just think he was a weirdo… who liked spanking children”

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Luke: “Plus, plus, plus, plus, plus, plus”

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Luke: Reciting lyrics from DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince’s “Summertime”

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Luke: Saying “Ah, toi toi toi… Erin go bragh” in an Irish accent

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Luke: Saying “You know it, baby” and playing a falling bomb sound effect

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Luke and Andrew: “Uh, Rudy has a tan line! Mmmm!!!”

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Andrew: “Good morning. Yesterday’s show title, by the way, ended up being ‘Sexual’… I’m sorry, not ‘Sexual’… ‘Sectional Healing'”

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Andrew: “I am in a little bit of trouble with one of our colleagues… I don’t think you know about this”

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Andrew: “I could Google it right now! I’m going… crazy over here!”

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Andrew: “I found this podcast in the parking lot… It’s your lucky day. Plug and play it right into your New York Times… podcast machine”

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Andrew: “I really, um… trust… Governor Jay Inslee”

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Andrew: “I still fetishize the key cards… of… of… the places that employ me”

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Andrew: “If you love something, let it go. If it doesn’t come back, hunt it down and kill it”

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Andrew: “Now I have so many things to say”

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Andrew: “Now, you had a key card. Did you lose that key card? Be honest with me. Nobody’s listening”

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Andrew: “Oh, God! I don’t like to think about snakes”

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Andrew: Saying “Get at us, New York Times!” in a funny manner

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Andrew: Saying “I really” in a cracked voice

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Andrew: Saying “I’m listening!” in a funny manner

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Andrew: Saying “If it’s this… if this is gonna put a smile on people’s faces… I’ll do it!” in a funny manner

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Andrew: Saying “Linda! Happy Blursday… from Luke and Andrew” in a funny manner

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Andrew: Saying “Linda!” in a funny manner

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Andrew: Saying “Shifting expectations are going to effect how we look at things like climate change… and pandemics” in a funny manner

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Andrew: Singing along with the Blursday song’s funky bass

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Andrew: “The Freeze. What is the Freeze?”

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Andrew: “Uh-oh!”

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Andrew: “We’re doing it together”

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Andrew: “Well, lemme grab this thing as far away from its… chompers as possible, as you might say”

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Andrew: “What are they doing!?”

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Andrew: “Yeah. I, I think people should just keep their stinky feet to themselves”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew had a strong take on people walking around with bare feet in stores and restaurants

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Andrew and Luke: “I could Google it right now! I’m going… crazy over here! This is good… This is… you know… It’s good for you to… work on delaying gratification for once in your life”

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Andrew and Luke: “Luke! (Oh my God) Old fart!”

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Luke: “Of course, you could edit this out”

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Luke: “Oh, God. I remember this!!”

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Luke: Saying “Weird!” in a funny manner

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Luke: “Somebody better get these barefoot snakes… off this… M-Fing plane!”

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Luke: “The Seattle Laser Bacon Cats”

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Luke: “The soft bigotry of lowered expectations”

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Luke: “This is all yours, baby!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Divorce? I’m listening! Eight-year old Luke Burbank, ‘I’m listening!'”

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Luke and Andrew: Getting mentioned for providing a drop of Andrew doing his impression of a drop a listener was searching for

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Luke and Andrew: “Sorry. Oh my God. What are we even doing?”

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Luke and Andrew: “What am I supposed to do? How can I help from Bellingham, Washington? Join the militia”

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