Day: June 12, 2022

Note: The show numbers got a bit wonky starting with #3702 in the podcast feed and on TBTL.net. This show, posted on June 10, 2022, was listed as #3702.

Andrew: “Adulting!”

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Andrew: “Bad Lieutenant 3: Can of Corn Call?”

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Andrew: “Bambi! Sounds like straight up Bambi shit”

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Andrew: “Doesn’t he say, ‘bleeping me’?”

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Andrew: “Every hair is different, Luke. Every little hair on that head of yours is different”

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Andrew: “I always promised you a rose garden”

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Andrew: “I cannot give out any hair advice. I mean… for Christ’s sake, look at me. I cannot give out any hair advice”

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Andrew: “I don’t understand it. That is labeled, ‘Can of Corn’!”

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Andrew: “I messed with some Pert Plus”

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Andrew: “I need my me time!”

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Andrew: “I was a… power user of Pert Plus growing up”

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Andrew: “I’m slinging tent”

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Andrew: “If I say anything that is insulting to you or your colleagues over there, we can… cut it out”

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Andrew: “My brain is bad”

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Andrew: “Oh… hurr?!”

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Andrew: “Permission to speak freely”

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Andrew: Saying “Ah-wooh? Is this a baseball?” as Adam Sandler

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Andrew: “Soft launch, hard sign”

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Andrew: “Take the picture!! Get me out of here!”

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Andrew: “That’s my brain!”

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Andrew: “That’s my brain!” #2

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Andrew: “This is not a good thing, by the way. I should probably just shut up right now for… both… to not say this both in front of you and the listeners”

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Andrew and Luke: “You gotta be… (You gotta be freaking me!) you gotta be bleeping me! (Are you… are you freaking me!?)”

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Luke: “But, I’ll tell you what, Andrew… it is… nice”

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Luke: “I’m… getting glammed!”

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Luke: “Is it weird that I like it when my pee smells like asparagus?”

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Luke: “It mocks me every time I open that drawer”

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Luke: “Obviously, this is not how… it works”

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Luke: “That won’t be fun and flirty enough!”

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Luke: “That’s what it sounds like when I drink water, by the way… for all of you SM–ASMR-heads… Or, even if you’re into SMR”

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Luke: “Why didn’t I bring my bell to Chicago?”

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Luke: “You got this!”

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Luke: “You’re almost there! You got this! You’re nailing it!”

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Luke: “You’re almost there!”

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Luke: “You’re nailing it!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Ooh-la-la! Oh-la-la! Big, beautiful purple balls over the plate. Yeah, man”

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Andrew: “‘Like, you don’t have any upcoming events.’ It’s like, ‘Like hell I don’t!'”

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Andrew: “As we famously say on this show, Luke… you don’t need your gestalt to work here, but it helps”

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Andrew: “Do I say Septamber [ph] funny? What happened to my… what happened to my face as I was saying ‘September’?”

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Andrew: “Don’t move, Brandon!”

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Andrew: “I could also talk about lady fingers for a while”

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Andrew: “I don’t think I’m moving in the, in the right direction with the rest of society”

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Andrew: “I still sometimes wake up, in the middle of the night, screaming… it was so bad”

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Andrew: “I wanna be… the good boyfriend today, and see if I can swoop in like a hero with some lady fingers”

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Andrew: “I’ll tell everybody a, a funny little… cartoon meme that I saw on… the Internet recently”

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Andrew: “I’ll tell everybody a, a funny little… cartoon meme that I saw on… the Internet recently… I’m just hearing the words I’m saying”

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Andrew: “I’m too old for the Internet!”

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Andrew: “My snowflakiness was so triggered by the… you know, here comes the swear, but… by somebody driving this big truck that says, ‘Fuck the Vax'”

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Andrew: “Oh, you’re in deep coach!”

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Andrew: Singing “Slot Man!”

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Andrew: “Sorry, I’m in a mood”

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Andrew: “Stay stationary, Brandon”

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Andrew: “That is the most Taargüs-Taargüs e-mail I’ve ever seen”

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Andrew: “That shit gets hot”

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Andrew: “Those are not… words!”

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Andrew: “Who wants a Blurs? We want a Blurs”

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Andrew: “You don’t need your gestalt to work here, but it helps”

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Andrew and Luke: “No, you’re just trapped! You’re just extending your hell (Yes)”

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Luke: “Critical Race Marketing… Convention?”

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Luke: “I’m Mikey. I’ll eat anything”

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Luke: “Pyramid of nonsense”

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Luke: “Stay put, Brandon!”

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Luke: “Stickies!”

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Luke: “Stickies!” #2

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Andrew: “Doing the rounds like a dad! Like, I had strong dad energy”

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Andrew: “Free beer! Suck it, John O’Brien!”

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Andrew: “Get outta here, ya scoundrel!”

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Andrew: “Get your boosters, y’all”

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Andrew: “Happy plugs”

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Andrew: “I almost got emotional the other night! I was probably drunk”

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Andrew: “I had been… on my phone, kind of, quickly scanning a few times leading up to this dump run”

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Andrew: “I just don’t care!”

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Andrew: “I went to the dump last week”

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Andrew: “I’m an old man. I need to get with the times”

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Andrew: “It was just like an echo chamber of awfulness”

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Andrew: “It’s like Cocktober [ph] in June”

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Andrew: “Like, I go ga-ga over just having, you know, ice and water in the door of my refrigerator”

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Andrew: “That rubber situation that I did not like”

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Andrew: “This is… a corny thing to say”

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Andrew: “This seems like a, an opportunity to really Burbank something here”

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Andrew: “This would be the ‘Me Defender'”

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Andrew: “You don’t belong here… and you know it”

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Andrew and Luke: “I have leaned even more into my anti-socialness. I realize like that there’s so many people that I have not seen… (I thought you were gonna say ‘semitism’) Save that for our other podcast”

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Andrew and Luke: “Like, my God! Every homestand, how many truckloads of garbage just leaves this place? And, that’s just the Mariners’ reliever. Ha-ha-ha, hey!”

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Luke: “Alright. Let’s take that quick break; and, then, when we come back… we will… talk dopamine”

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Luke: “Because, it’s maybe Cocktober [ph]“

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Luke: “Doctor Long Fingernails”

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Luke: “I mean, it’s the… it’s the goddamn… Hoover Dam of dopamine being released into my brain”

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Luke: “I need to have another alive thing in this apartment that I’m responsible for”

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Luke: “I’m from this… generation that has totally fetishized… gas”

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Luke: “I’m from this… generation that has totally fetishized… gas… ranges”

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Luke: “It was literally… a major disaster”

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Luke: Making an Apple AirPod connecting sound

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Luke: “My recommendation to you, not that you asked”

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Luke: “No mountain too tall; and, good luck to y’all”

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Luke: “This is me roasting myself… much like a… Brussel sprout”

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Luke: “We gotta get gas”

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Luke: “We gotta have that gas”

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Luke: “We gotta have that gas stove”

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Luke: “You gotta get the gas going”

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Luke and Andrew: “That’s your window to dump runs (Yeah!)”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke’s phone rings while he talks about taking in the rhythms, sounds, smells and vibes of being in nature

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Andrew: “Did you hear the one about the guy who… had 3 wishes; and, the first thing he wished for was a bigger peonies?”

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Andrew: “Don’t talk about your skillet. Don’t talk about your skillet. Don’t talk–Hey, Luke! How you doing?”

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Andrew: “I do like what you did with the fence, though!”

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Andrew: “I still have a little pop-up on my phone that tells me when it’s Garbage Time”

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Andrew: “Let’s just really bro down on this Brita”

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Andrew: “Often, if someone is talking directly to me, if it’s the middle of the day, I’ll nod, I’ll give them some sort of humanity”

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Andrew: “Oh, wait! No, wait! Hold on! So, what’s the deal with this refrigerator?”

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Andrew: “Wait a second!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Sorry, ladies… (I pulled it off) he’s taken… Until Becca hears this… In which case, he’s available again… But, why would ya?”

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Andrew and Luke: Trying to say “Refrigerator” as Tommy aka Luberg B

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Luke: “I think the natural… sequel to ‘How It Got In Your Mouth’ is ‘How It Left Your Butt'”

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Luke: “It’s because I did it”

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Luke: “Mr. Unlivable!”

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Luke: “What is the deal with Smart cars?”

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Luke: “What is… what is the deal with smart cars?”

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Luke and Andrew: “If you hear a certain swagger… (Mmm-hmm) in my voice today, Andrew; it’s because I did it”

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