Category: Audio Clips

Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2310

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Carey Burbank: “And, you’re like, ‘And an Olive kitten!'”

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Carey Burbank: “I’m not good, but I have a right”

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Carey Burbank: “I’m not good, but I have a right. I paid for this microphone.”

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Carey Burbank: “The difference between your hare-brained ideas and mine, are that… usually mine are, are based on logic; and, your’s will be, like, the physics of something you’re trying to do doesn’t make any sense”

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Carey Burbank: “Whee!!”

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Carey Burbank: “You have so many Rudyisms”

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Carey Burbank: “You want some food!!?”

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Carey Burbank and Luke: “Also, do you want to know a little dazzling deut… (Oh!) that I recently read, which was just so bizarre? (Okay)”

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Carey Burbank and Luke: “Can you hand me the wine, please? Yes. Just gonna get… give you some truth serum here? (Yes)”

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Luke: “And, I’m not like a hippie-dippie person”

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Luke: “Come on, this isn’t Soviet Russia… yet!”

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Luke: “I’m usually like, ‘What’s up.’ Then, like, I put on, like, my Oakley blades sunglasses and hover-board outta there…”

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Luke: “Mush!”

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Luke: “Oh, I’m not gonna tell them. I gotta get ’em to download before they figure out the awful truth.”

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Luke: “Resting B Face”

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Luke: Saying “I hope it snows… forever!” with a gravelly voice

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Luke: “She may… be part… bobcat; which, is why I’m gonna sleep with one eye open… going forward”

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Luke: Singing “I came in like a Rudy dog”

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Luke: “We’re gonna thank our TBTL Autotune level donors of the day”

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Luke: “You lie down with dogs, you wake up with fleas”

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Luke: “You want some food!!?”

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Luke and Carey Burbank: “And, we will see you tomorrow. Until then, no mountain too tall… No mountain (Oh!) too tall? Sorry, I was totally spacing out. No mountain too tall? Good luck to all.”

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Luke and Carey Burbank: Carey had told Rudy to tell Luke to “yap up”

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Luke and Carey Burbank: “Despite early promise as a fire maker, I–it’s, I really peaked early with that. Yeah, I, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you build a fire that lasted.”

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Luke and Carey Burbank: “I got Putin’d. Yeah, you did.”

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Luke and Carey Burbank: “I want to tell the listeners, you’re not pregnant. No. At least, not by me.”

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Luke and Carey Burbank: Luke admits he cries all the time

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Luke and Carey Burbank: Luke shushed Carey when the first Super Bowl ads came on

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Luke and Carey Burbank: “Oh, no. Yeah!”

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Luke and Carey Burbank: “This is so mean. Now, by the way, in order for me to do this, I have to torture our (I know) poor animal. I’ll say like, ‘You want some food!!?’ Ohh, she just got up and went out of the room. I hope that was worth it for you!!”

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Luke and Carey Burbank: “We’ve been, now, together for, like, five years? I think so, yeah. And, I feel very close to you. I love you very much.”

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Luke and Carey Burbank: Winding it up, winding it down and getting wine

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Luke and Carey Burbank: “Yeah, we had a fire-building contest; which, I won! What!? Believe it or don’t.”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2309

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Andrew: “Blam! Blam! Explosion! Huge monster thing. Even bigger than you thought!”

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Andrew: Chuckling

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Andrew: “Costa Rica will see you now”

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Andrew: “How could that make someone sad? I don’t know either.”

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Andrew: “I got mine at… Blankity, Blank!”

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Andrew: “I got mine!”

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Andrew: “I’m with ya, man”

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Andrew: “It’s a resort. There’s plenty of, of me getting drunk in a pool; but, there’s also monkeys”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Mr. Campbell will see you now”

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Andrew: “Mr. Walsh will see you now”

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Andrew: “No, I felt so sad; and, I don’t know why!!”

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Andrew: “Oh, I’m not gonna be around to do them”

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Andrew: “Oh, is that what that means!? No, oh-oh-oh-oh, goodness gracious. Okay.”

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Andrew: “Shut down the ipDTL!”

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Andrew: “That also sounds like a sexy good time, doesn’t it?”

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Andrew: Whispering “Secrets”

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Andrew: “Yeah, I’m a little bit of a, a ziggin’ when you think I’m gonna zag on, on that stuff, a little bit”

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Luke: “In the shadow of the Shears [sic] Tower; or, as they call it here, the Sears Tower”

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Luke: “Love the living tweedle out of”

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Luke: “That’s the most down thing you’ve ever said!”

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Luke: “The thermostat is… it’s, it’s, it’s lit. In the words of the kids, it’s on fleek”

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Luke: “The thermostats in many hotels are, in fact, just placebos… according to the Wall Street Journal. Meaning, that half of the people eating the thermostats are not even getting any medicine!”

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Luke: “This is class!”

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Luke: “Walshapalooza”

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Luke and Andrew: “I got the looks, you got the… moral compass. Fine. Well, yeah.”

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Luke and Andrew: “I’m not kidding, bud. I’m gonna miss you next week, bud. I know! Me too. I, I’m gonna miss me too.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Oh, eeppa-det-ah-el, eeppa-det-ah-el [ph]”

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Luke and Andrew: “Traverse City, Michigan! (Traverse City?!) I almost lived (Get a rope!)”

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Luke and Andrew: “Wait a minute, I gotta find a USB port for this. Does anybody have a charger?! Level, level. Yippie-ki-yay, mother–am I popping my Ps? Yippie-ki-yay, motherfucker. I’ll be talking at this level. Could we do a quick test? Could we do a quick test?”

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Luke and Andrew: “We’re having quite a stool boom… early on the program. I don’t wanna know about… okay.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Who instigated this? Who you do think!? The Mummy… or you? Of course! (Oh, okay) The Mummy!”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2308

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Andrew: “Geez, you and I are both… Ahh, man! We’re making so many people just so mad right now.”

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Andrew: “Hello, Luke Burbank!”

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Andrew: “Hold on. Everybody just calm down for one sec…”

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Andrew: “I hate waiting”

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Andrew: “I’ve done something wrong here, Luke… but, it might be interesting.”

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Andrew: “It is in–it’s insanity making!”

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Andrew: “It’s just not as fun as it used to be. You know what I mean? Like, not to be that old man”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing #2

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Andrew: Laughing #3

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “Okay”

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “That’s good”

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “Yes!! Yeah!”

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Andrew: “Ohh!!”

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Andrew: Punching in a clip of him laughing from two years ago

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Andrew: Short Laugh

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Andrew: “Vieves and I were very high, high on adrenaline and, and high on our own supply yesterday, I’ll say that.”

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Andrew: “Yay-yo!!”

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Andrew and Luke: “But, anyway, that was a very nice thing. It just makes me feel good to know that somebody, kind of, in the family. By the way, he’s my brother (as it were). In a Linh Pham-ily. Ohh!! Pretty good.”

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Andrew and Luke: “Oh no, Luke. What? It’s time to the folks about our sponsors”

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Andrew and Luke: RadioFreeWalsh.com and getting name mentioned

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Andrew and Luke: “That would explain your book, ‘What If I Did It?’ Exactly, although that one was more about passing gas on the airplane. What if I did it? No one knows, cuz we’re in a tube full of farts.”

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Andrew and Luke: “Well, that should work out well; because, you never have issues with your connection flight in Seattle to Bellingham. So… Can you not rain on my brainstorm!?”

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Andrew and Luke: “Whether it’s your mom, somebody you have a crush on, somebody you’re dating, somebody you’re married to, or somebody you do a podcast with. Wait, you got me Shari’s Berries? Not what I was going for there (Dang it!)”

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Luke: “A stroke of genius hits me, if I do say so”

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Luke: “And then, I need you to get in front of this banana yellow Hummer”

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Luke: “Dorked around on my computer”

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Luke: Gruff “You stay here!”

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Luke: “Holy guacamole!”

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Luke: “I couldn’t afford not to, Andrew”

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Luke: “I just watch the Super Bowl for the ads, man”

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Luke: “I knew they were sex things!”

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Luke: “I was gonna be God durned”

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Luke: “I’d like to thank our Dodie Pettit, Playin’ with the Boys, donors of the day”

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Luke: “Okay, long story longer”

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Luke: “Would you recognize my face?”

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Luke: “Ya bit. Ya bit.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Are you saying that we should probably just… call it good on this segment? I did just totally effing undermine this segment.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Do they have a first-class ticket to Chicago on Alaska Airlines, Andrew? Riddle me that (Oh, God)”

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Luke and Andrew: “I sent these to my mom last year. Yes, on Valentine’s Day, it’s not weird, Andrew! I didn’t say anything… Weirdo.”

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Luke and Andrew: “In a Linh Pham-ily. Ohh!! Pretty good.”

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Luke and Andrew: Mean correction e-mails, tweeters and level of sucking

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Luke and Andrew: “Some bikini babe is gonna… eat a URL… that’s very messy, (Right) as she’s washing a car”

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Luke and Andrew: “Until then, please remember: No mountain too tall, and good luck to all?”

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Luke and Andrew: “Well now, I’m happy to say I do it all the different ways. I’m a real good sex person.”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2307

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Andrew: “And, I’m legit bummed.”

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Andrew: “BTW”

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Andrew: Chuckling

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Andrew: Chuckling #2

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Andrew: “I dunno”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Maybe I just picked a bad day”

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Andrew: “No”

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Andrew: “Oh, man”

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Andrew: “Thank God!”

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Andrew: “That was the hardest intro… to not interrupt; because, I have so much to say about that corner grocery store.”

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Andrew: “This is such an Andrew story”

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Andrew: “We were thinking of honking it”

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Andrew: “Why did you pay me in chips?”

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Andrew: “Why is this money covered in pork bits?”

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Andrew: “Yabba-dabba-doo!!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Burbank, ya, ya backwoods idiot! Sorry, I’ve just been wanting to say that (Yeah) to you for a long time.”

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Andrew and Luke: “It’s Iceland’s shark. It’s Iceland Shark’s monster…”

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Andrew and Luke: Nicknames for “Apps”

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Andrew and Luke: “Oh, the D-D-Diet D? The D-D-Diet Dr. Pepper. I know that’s a lot of Ds, dude.”

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Andrew and Luke: “Phyllis was… did–Phyllis on this show; again, on a different show when you were out. God, you’re out a lot! (Mmm) I’m just kidding.”

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Andrew and Luke: “Will it say, ‘Make America Durn Good Again’? M–MADGA?”

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Andrew and Luke: “You are (Wow), you are on fire today (Thank you)”

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Andrew and Luke: “Your food’s ready, (Yeah) Burbank”

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Luke: “A Burbankster sometimes pays their debts”

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Luke: “Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah”

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Luke: “Boy, that Diet 7-Up is coming back on me. Tell you what… carbonation is no joke!”

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Luke: “Bullet. Dodged.”

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Luke: “Dang it!”

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Luke: “Glasses on, mouth up”

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Luke: “I didn’t… choose between Diet Dr. Pepper and Diet 7-Up, I got both of them; because, I run a very successful podcast.”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Slow your roll, Luke”

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Luke: Snorting

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Luke: “We don’t need another gyro. We don’t need to know the way home.”

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Luke: “Where the hell is security!?”

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Luke and Andrew: “And, he’s like… And, I could hear the pork (Oh, God!) lodging in (Oh, God!) his windpipe”

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Luke and Andrew: “I need more Diet Dr. Pepper to get my mind straight (It’s just what the Doctor ordered)”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke painted a great word picture of the Durn Good Grocery logo

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Luke and Andrew: “Talking about government programs!!! (Oh, right!)”

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Luke and Andrew: “Was this review useful? Two people said, ‘Yes’. Two people said, ‘Cool’. Cool! Sunglasses emoji.”

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Luke and Andrew: “‘We do not have pictures to share of the incident,’ police said in the release. ‘You are welcome’ Oh, a little cheeky there. Yeah, so to speak. Yea–Oh, yes! Nice.”

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Luke and Andrew: “You know what, Andrew? Dang it, if I was a better friend, I’d just give you a hundo for your time. No. Luke. Dude, it’s no big deal.”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2306

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Andrew: “1:00:28”

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Andrew: Doing some mouth saxamaphoning along with the Night Court theme

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Andrew: “I don’t know… squat about coffee; so, I’m not gonna try to even pretend to get into some sort of coffee talk with ya.”

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Andrew: “I was running to catch the G-D bus on Sunday night”

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Andrew: “It makes me feel so weird!”

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Andrew: “It would be extremely easy on us, if she were a cat who would come when called!!”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing #2

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Andrew: “Let’s not get mushy, guys. I’m getting emotional.”

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Andrew: “Oh, oh my gosh!”

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Andrew: “Really?!”

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Andrew: “Spatula City!”

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Andrew: “Ugh, I’m an idiot”

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Andrew: “You, you bend over low and you grab the hooks”

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Andrew and Luke: “Wa-wa-wa-wa? Lotta ‘Wa’ today.”

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Luke: “And, I’ll be gall-darned”

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Luke: Chuckling

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Luke: “Cuz, I’m usually passive-aggressive, hold the passive”

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Luke: “Kids these days!”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Once again, I was left regretting my decision”

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Luke: “Oooookay. Saved it!”

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Luke: “Speaking!”

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Luke: “Strap in, Walsh. Strap in, Goose.”

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Luke: “We’ll take it!”

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Luke: “Well, that thing went Broken Arrow on me. It went rogue.”

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Luke: “What was that?”

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Luke: “Yes”

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Luke and Andrew: “Andrew, I’m already regretting my nominee for Top Story; because, it’s not… it’s not a good story. Sounds more like granny time, based on your intro.”

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Luke and Andrew: Chicken and Eggs: Gross or Not

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Luke and Andrew: “I guess I’m just a, a Starbucks man, (But, but…) just like my father and his father before him. And, there’s nothing wrong with that!”

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Luke and Andrew: “It’s… immaterial! (You heard that too!)”

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Luke and Andrew: “May the VPN rise to meet you; and, may ICC always be at your back. Let not get mushy, guys. I’m getting emotional.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Oh, by the way, can I do some laundry here? I’ll do your goddamn laundry.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Oh, geez. We dreamcatching? Oh, oh my gosh!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Sorry, I call it ‘The Ham’. I dunno where that came from. The Bay City. Now I’m hungry.”

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Steve Neuman: “Barton Fink! Barton Fink!”

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Steve Neuman: “Hello, my sweet adult sons. How are you guys doing?”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2305

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Andrew: “I just don’t fall down that much”

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Andrew: “I just stumbled on something”

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Andrew: “It just hangs out there like a fart”

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Andrew: “It’s not a good story, but it’s long”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing #2

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Andrew: Laughing #3

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Andrew: Laughing #4

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Andrew: “Like, that’s the most Burns-y thing to ever Burns”

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Andrew: “My brain is not working a hundred percent. That might lead to some real, ridiculous, funny conversation today; or, it might just mean, I need to turn off my microphone at some point, Luke.”

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Andrew: No Egg Talk

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Andrew: “Nope”

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Andrew: “Oh, my goodness!”

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Andrew: “Oh! Yeah.”

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Andrew: Reading a listener’s fart-take on lyrics to The Bangles’s “Eternal Flame”

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Andrew: “So, there was no winning”

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Andrew: “That’s a tired old joke. God, I’m mad!”

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Andrew: “The poop songwriter was a girl!”

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Andrew: “These questions I’m gonna ask you should not matter, but I need to ask them”

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Andrew: “We don’t!”

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Andrew: “Were you chanting in the hot tub?”

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Andrew: “Why are, why are these people so fancy?”

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Andrew: “Wow! Wow!”

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Andrew and Luke: “I regret playing this. I don’t.”

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Andrew and Luke: “You’re a zoodler, (Yeah) not a toodler. Sorry. (Exactly, right) I’m sorry.”

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Luke: “Believe you, me”

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Luke: Chuckling

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Luke: “I don’t know if I’m the dog… or the dirty dog”

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Luke: “I think the most fun part of zoodling”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Nude”

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Luke: “Oh, this isn’t your first egg talk this week! You disgust me.”

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Luke: Saying “G’day, mate. You gonna head over to Los Angeles and put a shrimp on the barbie?” mostly in an Australian accent

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Luke: Saying “The stories are so long for being so boring”

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Luke: “We can breeze into a room… like a fart”

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Luke: “We have a new segment today that we want to bring you, it’s called: Luke Responds to Twitter”

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Luke and Andrew: “Andrew, speaking of which, ask me what I am wearing? Nope. Not falling for that again.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Good times, man. Really good times. Sounds like it’s sexy-fun times for you.”

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Luke and Andrew: “I think we have to thank our Kenny Loggins, Playing with the Boys level (Oh, okay) donors of the day”

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Luke and Andrew: “I was going to do the show in the buff; but, then, Carey threatened to take a picture of me with her iPhone and send it to you. And, that, that had me putting on clothes real fast. Wow! Wow!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Picture me getting into a hot tub, naked, spinning a volleyball on my finger, (No!) playing with the boyz. I’m not doing that!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Question asked. Question answered. Yeah. Maybe one follow-up comment. New question posed, new question answered.”

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Luke and Andrew: Singing “Night job. Hero of the… day job.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Welcome to TBTL Drunk History, except no one’s drunk. (Hoooo!) I know! What’s going on?”

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Luke and Andrew: “Yeah, but it’s not Frankenstein, it’s Frankenstein’s Zucchini. Oh, right. Don’t, please don’t continue to make that mistake on this program, as per usual.”

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