Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2629: Luke Burbank Edition

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Luke and Andrew started thanking the TBTL Dazzling Donors who donated at the top level during last year’s TBTL-a-thon; and, I was the first Dazzling Donor to be thanked. Without any further comment, here is thank you message Luke and Andrew had for me.

Luke and Andrew: Dazzling Donor message

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Luke: “Dank of America”

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Luke: “Duly noted!”

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Luke: Explaining that there is a “Dank of America” in Blaine, Washington

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Luke: “Give me a brark… like”

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Luke: “Hey… two people just had emotional diarrhea for an hour and twenty minutes, and called it a show”

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Luke: “Hi! There was a man… and, he was so”

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Luke: “I don’t understand what the fuck they’re doing most of the time”

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Luke: “I’m not just trying to… shine this turd of a… decision making process by me up”

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Luke: “I’ve already gotten one more thing right, here on the show, than I expected… all day… So, that means, it’s gonna be pretty much just… mess ups and slam dunk, three-pointers… from here on out”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: Laughing #2

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Luke: “Oooh!”

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Luke: Quietly saying “He can probably tip this car over”

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Luke: Saying “I want yous” as Bob Dylan

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Luke: Saying “It should feel like being in a wood structure” as Bob Dylan

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Luke: Saying “Make it taste like I’m in a wood box” as Bob Dylan

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Luke: Saying “Oh, hi Tens!” as Tommy Wiseau

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Luke: Singing “Troll for the trash man”

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Luke: Talking as if he had safety-pinned his tongue

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Luke: “There is something about the soul of a Pham”

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Luke: “This, right here, this is the show that just… might… be… Too… Beautiful… To… Live”

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Luke: “You’re in my world now, Gramama”

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Luke: “You’ve always been here”

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Luke and Andrew: “Bullshit! By the way… I added that part. Alright”

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Luke and Andrew: “Due Dylan-gence? I think so. Yeah”

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Luke and Andrew: “Get on it, Pham! (Right)”

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Luke and Andrew: “I don’t know what the fuck he’s talking about. Sorry, so many F words today. (Hmm) That’s how I process my grief. Mmm-hmm”

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Luke and Andrew: “If we can jump back to tongue talk for just a moment (Yeah, let’s do it)”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke saying “Duly noted” as Bob Dylan and Andrew making a Bob Dylan-like sound

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Luke and Andrew: “No!!! (Yes) Really?”

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Luke and Andrew: “Our tune-in factor on Friday is gonna be through the roof! Is Nora the new host or not?”

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Luke and Andrew: “That’s a lotta Ps, dude (I know!)”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2629: Andrew Walsh Edition

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Andrew: “And, that’s your story. And, it’s a beautiful story”

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Andrew: “Aw, man. That was boring”

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Andrew: “But, I felt… like… such an impostor walking in there; and, I know that I just oozed out… this imposter-dom”

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Andrew: “I don’t know, man. What’s worse, this or tongue talk?”

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Andrew: “I mean, I’m sorry… I was being so frank about the garbage… No, just joking”

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Andrew: “I mean, there is an over-arching narr–Over-arcing? Over… over arching. Arching… Narrative arc. Arcing. I don’t know, man! Get of my back!”

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Andrew: “I think I was being a little shitty”

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Andrew: “I will never be cool about anything again”

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Andrew: “Just to be corny for a second”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing #2

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Andrew: Laughing #3

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Andrew: “Let’s not make this totally about… me and my tongue”

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Andrew: Making trombone bass support sounds

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Andrew: Mimicking the funky bass line at the end of “The Right Way to Rock”

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Andrew: “Not to turn this into a competition of who’s got a more pathetic story”

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Andrew: “Oaaahhh, I’m back!”

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Andrew: “Oh, I get to go in a wheelchair!”

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Andrew: “Oh, wait… what do you mean… it was weird”

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Andrew: “Ooh, ‘Who Trolls the Trash Man'”

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Andrew: “Over my head! Over my head!”

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Andrew: Saying “Highly” as Bob Dylan

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Andrew: Saying “Uh, Luke, I’m in a lotta pain talking like this” as if he really had an impaired tongue

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Andrew: Saying some gibberish as Bob Dylan

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Andrew: “There are raccoons outside! One of them looked at me!”

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Andrew: “Well, then how am I gonna get any pity?”

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Andrew: “When it’s time to stab, stab, stab”

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Andrew: “Yeah. I don’t know what I was thinking”

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Andrew: “You can dip in and dip out”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew asking if Luke could tell if Andrew’s tongue was impacting how he sounded

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew asking when Luke started being in the pocket of Big Tree

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Andrew and Luke: “It’s like… (God) it’s like I’m showering in the jazz age… You’ve always been here, Andrew”

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Andrew and Luke: “So, I think… that’s a (Cool) hint as to how the young people are doing it these days”

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Andrew and Luke: “They dazzled us; they razzled us… Yeah… They donored us”

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Andrew and Luke: “This is called, ‘Speaking in Tongues’. Tongues! Tongues!! (Oh, right, right, right) Got it. Yeah (Tongues)”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2628

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Luke: “I think she cray”

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Luke: “I… completely and totally… shit the bed”

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Luke: “I’m multitasking. Got my hands in the air… like I just don’t care; and, I’m killing a fly”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Oh, shit!!”

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Luke: “That shit be dark”

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Luke: “That was Odell’s… chance to blow; and, he did not miss it”

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Luke: “What is ‘Panties to the Side’ an acronym for? It’s like the seventh track off that album”

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Luke: “Ya tried”

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Luke and Nora McInerny: Andrew Walsh talk

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Luke and Nora McInerny: “Have you ever used the sign? Oh, I use the sign… (Do you ever use the sign?) I use the signs all the time. Like… they sat on my… What’s their reaction!? I… What do you think!? Okay? What do you think? I, I don’t know!”

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Luke and Nora McInerny: “I mean, that’s the whole thing about… fairy tales; particularly, like Grimm fairy tales… that shit be dark… (Oh, yeah) right?”

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Luke and Nora McInerny: “Let’s try to sneak a Top Story in here, at the… (Before we get to the river) practically at the end of the show. (Okay) Yes, exactly. Stu’s gonna be at the river in four minutes… I’m sorry… Randall’s gonna be at the river in four minutes. Randall Stuart”

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Luke and Nora McInerny: Nora makes a Newman callback as part of some casino talk

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Luke and Nora McInerny: “Oh, (Yeah) no! Really? Yeah”

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Luke and Nora McInerny: “Please remember: No mountain too tall… and, good luck to all”

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Luke and Nora McInerny: Singing Next’s “Too Close”

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Luke and Nora McInerny: “Wow. Thanks a lot, wind on top of my wings. Which is, how you fly… Did you know that?”

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Nora McInerny: “I grew up Catholic; and, it sucked so bad. And, I hated going to church so much; cuz, it was… so… boring. It was so bad”

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Nora McInerny: “I’m kidding. I’m making the jokes now”

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Nora McInerny: “Oh, God. I’m so bad at remembering, like, the names of things!”

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Nora McInerny: Quietly saying “When you go to sleep tonight… I’m gonna come in your room… and kick your ass”

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Nora McInerny: “Stay on message, Nora! Stay on message”

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Nora McInerny: “This is the empire that APM doesn’t see me building”

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Nora McInerny and Luke: “Hi! (Hi!) Hi! Hi. I just always get very… excited to speak to other people… I work from home a lot… Do I get to say, ‘Hi,’ now?”

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Nora McInerny and Luke: “I do not know a single… woman who doesn’t hear that think, ‘Oh, yeah, I am… Yes, I am’ Really? Mmm-hmm. Oh, yeah. Do you think (Yeah) it’s a little on the nose? Oh, I love it. I love it”

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Nora McInerny and Luke: Nora thought Steve Neuman’s name was “Randall Stuart” based on his Twitter handle

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Nora McInerny and Luke: “She’s a lady… so… Oh! The pastor… (The lady pastor…) was a lady. The pastor was lady! How could this be possible!? Cuz, it’s… a Lutheran church; and, they let… women… do that”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2627

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Luke: “All you usually talk about is grief; and… and, we’re not gonna talk about that. We’re gonna talk about TBTL dumb stuff”

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Luke: “Alright, let’s see here. Do I remember how all this works? Microphone… active… Intro music… getting quieter… Voice… getting louder… Hey, look at that, everybody”

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Luke: “And now, we’re really taking a… we’re taking a drive down… the road of boredom”

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Luke: “And then, we’ll say adiós… for this… bizarro edition of TBTL”

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Luke: “And, I’m doing this solo today; you’re welcome, America… and… and parts of Australia”

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Luke: “Drugs are the best… My only regret is that they couldn’t have kept me drugged up a little longer”

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Luke: “Her whole game is grief, y’all!”

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Luke: “Here we are… here we are… doing the show. Actually wasn’t sure… what the plan was gonna be for today’s episode”

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Luke: “I could not… stare at the server… and say, ‘Rooty Tooty Fresh ‘N Fruity… Please give me the Rooty Tooty Fresh ‘N Fruity.’ Could not make myself do it”

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Luke: “I decided to just, like, turn on this microphone… and start talking… and, then… when I run out of things to say… or the construction noise in the… in the ceiling… above me here at Burbank Springs becomes so loud… that you can no longer here me… then, it will be time to end the show. One of those two things will happens; and, then, that will just be a sign… that it’s the end of today’s episode of TBTL”

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Luke: “Oh my God. I’m sorry. I have to let it go until the very end; because, of that… that… bass jam freak out is just too good”

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Luke: “That… that’s not a feeling… That’s not a good… a, sort of, comforting thing to know”

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Luke: “This is not an impossible dream, Micah”

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Luke: “This show has gone from… emotionally weird to just straight-up boring”

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Luke: “Why do I have to bring politics into this!?”

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Luke: “Yeah, Micah, we’re all dealing with hard things this week! That wasn’t fair, Micah. That was not fair at all. I’m sorry… You’re just a tree… you’re just a tree that thinks your sandwich problems are as intense as my grief right now”

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Luke: “You know how when you have the DVR… and you hit fast-forward, like, three or four times and it just shows you a lightning bolt… and it’s just really humming through… whatever that thing is your recorded… I wanna lightning bolt to the end of this feeling”

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Luke: “You know, by the way… I don’t even know if any of you are gonna hear this; because… Andrew is the one who puts these shows… on Internet and in your phones. I don’t know how he gets ’em on your phones. I think he drives around door-to-door and like… like the tooth, like reverse tooth fairy; he inserts them into your phone… or something?”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2625: Luke Burbank Edition

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Luke: “As we were just about to start recording on this thang… Sorry, I just used ‘thang'”

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Luke: Cute laugh

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Luke: “Hello, my crow-bro!”

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Luke: “I loved that song… for many, many moons and never knew what the flip he was talking about”

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Luke: “I mean, what the what!?”

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Luke: “Meanwhile… my Titcoin is drooping”

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Luke: “No, don’t do it, Luke”

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Luke: “Not Africa”

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Luke: “Oh, my God in heaven!”

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Luke: “Oh, my Guyver in heaven!”

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Luke: Saying “Alright, everybody” in a sing-songy manner

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Luke: Saying “Dave, I’m Lyle the intern. I’m really chill!” in a funny, high-pitched voice

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Luke: Saying “Hi, I’m Andy Dick… here to talk about harassment” as Andy Dick

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Luke: Saying “Yeah!” as Adam Duritz

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Luke: “That also perfectly describes our vibe: raw, real and local. Wait, rural. I just said, ‘raw, real and local’!”

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Luke: “The call is coming from inside the house”

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Luke: “They’re no longer in the box, Andrew. They come in from the back of the theater!”

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Luke: “To F some S up”

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Luke: “We can’t do any of that before we welcome to the program, the longest running crow-bro… Crow-bro… of the show… I think of him more as a Counting Crow-bro… Yeah!”

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Luke: “What are you, asleep, man!!?”

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Luke: “While we were talking, I went on the New York Times… website; because, I, up here in the Bay City, have been dying to get that Sunday paper that you… couldn’t care less about”

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Luke and Andrew: Andrew comparing ice cream truck drivers blocking out the annoying songs to parents block out their kid’s screaming and wailing

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Luke and Andrew: “Animate that, Erik! That’s how we’re gonna get him to do our bidding”

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Luke and Andrew: “By the way, thanks to Linh Pham for sending that along… Hey, everybody, don’t abuse the Linh Pham privileges. That’s just for me and Andrew, okay? Yeah”

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Luke and Andrew: “Is that why you find him to be creepy? No! I… I just (Oh, really) find him to be creepy because he’s really creepy”

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Luke and Andrew: “Not all river shows are true river shows; but, all true river shows are river shows. Yes”

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Luke and Andrew: “Ooh! No, no, no, no, no, no, no, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it! Alright, what? Tell me. Got it”

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Luke and Andrew: “Stop! Stop… By the way, stopping… is the first step towards not doing… That’s what I’ve always said… today. I would say, ‘Stopping is the second step in not doing it'”

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Luke and Andrew: “We had that whole break, we never even listened to the sketch; now, we’re gonna have to listen… Oh, what the fuck did I do!? I’m sorry… Do you want to just stop and restart?”

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Luke and Andrew: “Yelling at Erik to animate things is the new yelling at Linh to pull audio drops. Animate that!”

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Luke and Andrew: “You know… if you can’t play the drop, at least you can stumble over it… in your… re-description of it. I mean, at least, at least, I can bring that to the table. We should teach a class”

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