Andrew: “Alright, here it is. As promised. LL Cool J news!”
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Andrew: “Cuz, I only have a couple more minutes to be king!”
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Andrew: “Hey, this is crazy. I don’t know you… but, call me maybe”
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Andrew: “I love your story! It’s a beautiful story!”
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Andrew: “I’m an idiot”
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Andrew: “I’m on a roll today, man! Whoo!!”
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Andrew: “It just keeps going. It just keeps going and going and going.”
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Andrew: “It’s no longer yesterday. Now, it’s tomorrow again.”
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Andrew: “Oh, fuck, that’s me literally”
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Andrew: Saying “Try it for free” in a sing-songy manner
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Andrew: “Sigh”
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Andrew: Singing “Bom, bom, bom” along with a song
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Andrew: “So, maybe that’s why I’m insane”
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Andrew: “Speaking of me, by the way… This is my last day helming this ship. This… USS TBTL”
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Andrew: “That will really blow everybody’s minds”
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Andrew: “That’s a backhanded compliment”
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Andrew: “That’s wonderful!”
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Andrew: “This almost makes me pro-racism!”
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Andrew: “This is not where the segment’s supposed to go. Why did I do this?”
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Andrew: “Uh, yeah, Genevieve deals with this shit all the time”
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Andrew: “We have… LL Cool J news!”
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Andrew: “What!!!?”
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Andrew: “Yeah! Cuz, it’s a fucking racist flag!”
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Andrew: “You scamp!!”
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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “According to my answers, I am… (Uh-huh) The Pickup Artist. Ah! I bet nobody’s called you that before. Hey! Hey! It’s a compliment. No, they have! Very smooth. Ladies. Ladies. Call me, ‘LL Cool Andy'”
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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “Alright, Phyllis, who’s the best around? The donors! The TBTL donors! That’s right.”
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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: Andrew won’t tell Luke about what has been going on while Luke has been out
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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “How would you characterize your relationship with dust bunnies? If they qualified as animals… I’d be running a shelter. Oh, no, Better Homes and Gardens! (Oh, yeah!) Oh, you! Oh my gosh. You scamp!!!”
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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “I don’t know you; and, this is crazy… (Yeah?) But, thanks for the gift, you got my baby? Yeah, that’s good!”
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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “LL Cool J!? (Yeah) Huh!!?”
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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “Oh my God, I can’t!! Darn it!”
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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “Putting all of that aside for a second. I’m gonna calm down and get back on the track here. What were we saying? (It just, it just…) Could we just just do, could we just do… the q-quiz!?”
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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “This is totally unrelated to anything I was supposed to talk to you about (Oh!)”
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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “Wait, that’s it? Oh my God! The look on your face, I was expected… Like, one of the guys on the radio, he walked in, into somebody’s bathroom, and it had a blown-up sex doll. Oh, dear! Well…”
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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “What the eff!? (Yep) Are you serious? (Yep. Yep)”
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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “You don’t make the bed everyday, huh? Hell, no. Really? Just like pull the comforter over? Okay… no… no judging! Didn’t know that happened. (Eh)”
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Phyllis Fletcher: Adding “Yeah… Unh, unh, unh” to Brad Paisley’s “Accidental Racist”
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Phyllis Fletcher: “Errrrrrrgh! Stop the show!”
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Phyllis Fletcher: “I’ll have what she’s having”
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Phyllis Fletcher: “It wasn’t like… it wasn’t even so much like… ‘Eww!’ Or… you know, like… ‘Oh my God!’ or, like that kind of snobby stuff”
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Phyllis Fletcher: Laughing
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Phyllis Fletcher: “Oh, thank God!!!”
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Phyllis Fletcher: “What!!!?”
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Phyllis Fletcher: “You’re cuckoo though”
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Phyllis Fletcher and Andrew: “I… I will go to town on some canned chili. I will (Yeah) grub on that.”
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Phyllis Fletcher and Andrew: “TBTL: Breaking News (Right)”
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