Clips From TBTL #2358

Andrew: “And if so, I’ll kill him!!!”

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Andrew: “Are you gonna be the most chill booking I’ve ever had; or, is this the beginning of a nightmare?”

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Andrew: “I am a fidgeter”

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Andrew: “I felt like a terrorist for a second”

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Andrew: “Is it me?!?”

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Andrew: “Let me ask you a question”

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Andrew: “Like, my gut is my most embarrassing feature of me, and that includes my brain; so, that’s how bad it is.”

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Andrew: “No shit”

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Andrew: “Oh, did she say anything? I just laughed at ya.”

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Andrew: “Oh, here comes the guess! Here comes the guess! Are you ready?”

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Andrew: “Oh, is that the version you’re telling?”

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Andrew: Quickly singing lyrics to “These Eyes” by The Guess Who

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Andrew: Singing “These eyes”

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Andrew: “This is bugging me, man!”

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Andrew: “This is me talkin’!”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew has some spoofs and will be whizzing some smokers

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Luke: “And I didn’t see anything… and, I went into a complete panic”

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Luke: “Don’t try to contain your joy”

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Luke: “Don’t… praise… the machine”

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Luke: “I’m, I’m sitting here ready to be whizzed. Wait a minute, that came out wrong.”

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Luke: “Let’s go ahead and, and let the fun out. Who let the fun out, by the way?”

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Luke: “Nirvana!!”

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Luke: “Right!?”

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Luke: Saying “Did I do that?” as Steve Urkel

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Luke: “Talk about Net Non-Neutrality, my friend”

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Luke: “That is how… that is, that is how hardwired the pathways of my little pea brain are”

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Luke: “This is Apollonia of nothing”

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Luke: Trying to sing and remember lyrics from Prince’s “U Got The Look”

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Luke: “You know, the show is like a dynasty: You screw it up and then you walk away… and you let Laura Hadden fix it”

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Luke and Andrew: “I’m gonna give you a ‘Forget-Me-Now’. Okay. Or… or even a, if you so choose, a ‘Forget-Me-Shot'”

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Luke and Andrew: “If every once in a blue moon, you actually got someone who had, you know, a bunch of C4… in one of their butthole flaps. Then, it’d be like, (Come on) that would be exciting.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Pretty good, Akinator and Walshinator! Yeah!”

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Luke and Andrew: “We can do that on the road trip if you want. I’ll come in and throw a grapefruit at you! Okay, but I’m gonna have a knife.”

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Clips From TBTL #2357

Andrew: “God bless him for trying”

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Andrew: “God, don’t make me edit the show! I don’t wanna edit the show!”

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Andrew: “I know that we’ve talked about this a lot. I’m not trying to put you on blast here, or Front Street, or the, the Michelada, the Bud Light Michelada hot seat”

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Andrew: “I’m so sorry, Luke. I’m so sorry, everybody. I’m so sorry that I have to be the second half of this podcast.”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing #2

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Andrew: “Oh, wow!”

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Andrew: Quietly saying “Yeah, please don’t get us in trouble”

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Andrew: “Right now!”

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Andrew: “Rugrats and Burns”

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Andrew: Saying “Stop… criminal!” in a robotic manner

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Andrew: “What size nuts do we need again, or… Don’t make a joke.”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew has been prepping for a segment all morning, which means Luke and Andrew will get into an argument

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Andrew and Luke: “This jazz is really jazzy (Is really jazzin’)”

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Luke: “Boo-roo Rey [ph]

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Luke: “But, that’s fine. Everything’s fine. Everything’s going great.”

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Luke: Chuckling

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Luke: “Get back Lady Riefenstahl!!!”

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Luke: “Hamburguesa King”

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Luke: “I know how to call the PDs in all the different ways!”

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Luke: Luke thought he lost his car with Rudy in it

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Luke: “Oh, by the way… Apollonia of nothing”

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Luke: “Pod-dog… I had a little scare with the Pod-dog today”

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Luke: Saying “Something is arriving! Something is arriving!” as Borat

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Luke: Singing in a Prince-like manner

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Luke: Singing the “On The Media” theme

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Luke: “So, a lot of asterisks on that whole statement I just made”

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Luke: “‘US MARINE'”

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Luke: “Way to go, humanity!”

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Luke: “We get it! We get it.”

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Luke: “What!!?”

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Luke: “You wanna talk about some Minority Report shit”

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Luke and Andrew: Ranting about Seattle Mariners commentators

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Clips From TBTL #2356

Andrew: “And they would call me a ‘Podcaster of the Sky!’… Hopefully”

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Andrew: “Cranky old man yelling at clouds”

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Andrew: “Google is getting smarter and smarter”

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Andrew: “Hey, man. So, uhh… what are you gonna do with those old toilets?”

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Andrew: “How many mustard sandwiches are in my butt, do you think? That’s what I wanna know.”

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Andrew: “Is today the, the mustard the broke the Quarter Pounder’s back?”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing #2

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Andrew: Laughing “Yeah, right”

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Andrew: “Like a big boy”

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Andrew: “Oh my God, what was his story?”

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Andrew: “Things are gonna start happening to me now”

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Luke: “Butt-chugging”

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Luke: Chuckling

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Luke: “Dang! You know what? They covered this in mustard, I just ate a different… four hundred calorie sandwich. Hmm, if I’m lucky, four hundred calories. How about we call it good on the night eating!?”

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Luke: “Hippy-dippy”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Please, no more butt flap drops”

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Luke: Saying “Did I graduate?” in a funny voice

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Luke: “Seriously, dog!?”

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Luke: “That just gives… ‘Technogeeks with Spreadshee’ a run for its money in terms of… unsatisfying audio drops”

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Luke: “There’s something about the soul of the Quarter Pounder”

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Luke: “They have a sink in the stall, it was the disabled one. I’m not disabled… some of my friends are”

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Luke: “Well, I want to thank some of our Alanis Morissette, Thank You India, Thank You Silence, level donors of the day”

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Luke: “Yard Garden Terlet Art”

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Luke: “You know, things are kind of coming up Burbank, Andrew.”

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Luke: “You’d find out that people are lying!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Terlet” Talk

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Luke and Andrew: “This is how it goes with airplane tickets. Sometimes you to get to fly on the plane, sometimes you don’t. Right. That’s a ticket!”

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Luke and Andrew: “We should play a game called, ‘Make It About You with Luke Burbank’. I think we do. It’s called TBTL. It’s called, ‘Make It About Butthole Flaps with Luke Burbank'”

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Clips From TBTL #2355

Andrew: “Alfred E. Burbank is what I call you”

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Andrew: “Alright, here’s a part of the show where I get into fight with a blind woman in Bozeman. No.”

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Andrew: “Because, we know who you are!”

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Andrew: “Condom over the, over the eye, right?”

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Andrew: “Derp, derp, derping”

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Andrew: “I feel like an honorary Burbank brother and I’m saying that in all sincerity; and, I thought about it this weekend, and I was like, ‘Aww, that makes me…’ It warmed the cockles.”

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Andrew: “I’m trying, I’m trying to look up Duvalier, and I don’t even know how to spell it… man. I’m losing my public radio cred… as we speak.”

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Andrew: “It’s, it’s like a Podcast Hackett Buddy”

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Andrew: Laughing and Saying “Let’s not!”

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Andrew: “Oh, no! We’re out of music. We have to make up our mind now!”

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Andrew: “Oh… damn it!”

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: “That sounds like a Burbank tweet”

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Andrew: “Well, the problem is, when you’re Andrew, and you’re a little bit dumb to begin with; and then, you’re a little bit drunk to begin with… sometimes you leave the bar without paying!”

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Andrew and Luke: “And I, I promise you, I promise you, I promise you, I’m not trying to make this… not fun (Sound gay?)”

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Andrew and Luke: “Do you have to e-mail me to tell me that!? (Oh, no)”

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Andrew and Luke: “Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na… Dashlane! Dashlane!”

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Josh Holz and Pitbull: “Damn, Fireball! Back at it again with the white Vans.”

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Luke: “And also, the fact that I kind of, slightly have, I have… I dunno, cold head?”

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Luke: “Dang it!”

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Luke: “Holy password management, Andrew!”

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Luke: “I guess that there’s no… there’s no undoing that doodle”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: No baseball talk, or Luke will snap his laptop in half

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Luke: “Really?”

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Luke: Saying “For energy, remember me! Oi!” as said in a battery advert

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Luke: “Smile with your teeth!!”

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Luke: Tripping over the word “Airplane”

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Luke: “Yes, I got bumped!”

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Luke and Andrew: Andrew gave an honest “Ugh” to Luke chanting “Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oi Oi Oi!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Are you sure ‘secretism’ is a word? No… it’s definitely not a word.”

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Luke and Andrew: ASMR Construction Talk

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Luke and Andrew: “But, you shoulda seen what this joker wanted to wear. I know!”

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Luke and Andrew: “It’s like a wedding or a funeral, those come to mind… Those happen once; unless, you’re me… and then… how many weddings. Power out! Love it.”

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Luke and Andrew: “That’s such a good joke. It’s such a bad joke! No, it’s not, dude. It’s such a good joke.”

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Clips From TBTL #2354

Bill sent in a chopped and screwed version of TBTL, also called “Drunk TBTL” in which the clip of Andrew and Luke talking were slowed down by about half their normal speed.

Andrew and Luke: Chopped and Screwed TBTL

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Andrew: Andrew wonders how many Big Macs are in his butt, calorie-wise

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Andrew: “But, I’m gonna say that I’ve got at least, like, five or six Big Macs in my butt, right? No?”

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Andrew: Chopped and Screwed “Good luck to all”

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Andrew: Cute Laugh

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Andrew: “God, this is disgusting!”

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Andrew: “Hey, hey Carl, your shoes’ untied”

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Andrew: “Holy macaroni! We’re starting with that one!?”

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Andrew: “I did not watch much Cheers. I know that’s a weird-ass thing to throw out there.”

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Andrew: “I don’t count calories much”

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Andrew: “I heard tell of this, yeah”

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Andrew: “I, I pray that the Stu-bot is not listening”

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Andrew: “I’m clearly not carrying around a lotta, a lotta calories in my, between my ears, I guess.”

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Andrew: “If you’re drinking coffee that you, literally, just ran through the same grounds you used yesterday, you be should stirring it with a Bic pen and you know it.”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing “What!?”

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Andrew: Quiet “Really?”

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Andrew: Sighing

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Andrew: Singing “You don’t bring me flowers”

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Andrew: “Sorry, Luke, I can tell you put a lotta work in his segment; but… it’s, it’s over.”

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Andrew: “Tell me more!”

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Andrew: “This is gonna sound whiny”

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Andrew: “What?!? Is it like, ‘Sun’s out, guns out’?”

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Andrew: “Yeah. By the way, I’m done, I’m done with those. Those are too scary. I don’t like being shouted at.”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew didn’t edit out him saying that he would eat Big Macs out of a singer’s butt

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Andrew and Luke: Chopped and Screwed “It was slowed down. I, I could have been Matthew Sweet.”

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Andrew and Luke: Upsetting Ugly Behavior and Face

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Andrew and Luke: “Well, by just measuring the result, you change them, sort of. Schrödinger’s credit rating?”

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Luke: “Arby’s… We have the Big Macs in our butt! That would be a weird commercial for them to make.”

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Luke: “Because, I’ll tell you what… I fucking. Excuse me for being profane on a Friday morning.”

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Luke: Chopped and Screwed “Don’t say anything about my friend, Andy”

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Luke: Chopped and Screwed “Here’s another thing about the carbs in a human lung”

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Luke: Chopped and Screwed “You kissed me once when you were drunk”

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Luke: “Cuz, that’s how I do? #PodLife”

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Luke: “I cannot eat… these unsorted bolts”

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Luke: “I’m drinking yesterday’s coffee, today; and, I mean that in the most literal sense.”

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Luke: “My name is Luke… ‘Needle Nose’ Burbank, I am your host”

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Luke: Saying “Arby’s… We have the Big Macs in our butt!” as Ving Rhames

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Luke: “This basement, Andrew. This basement, doe.”

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Luke: “We are thanking our Def Leppard… Love Bites is Mas True, studio version with live crowd accompaniment level donors of the day”

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Luke: “We’ve got your e-mails. We’ve got your v-mails. We cannot eat… all of this input from the Tens of listeners; so, we will pass it back on to you.”

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Luke: “Why does he have a Super NES, but I still have… a Coleco?”

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Luke: “You know, I don’t wanna… I don’t wanna throw stones. I don’t wanna throw kidney stones”

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Luke and Andrew: “Because it’s Internet, it’s like crudely sexual and racially offensive (Wow)”

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Luke and Andrew: “God, everything we’re talking about is making me hungry! (I know!)”

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Luke and Andrew: “It was a real, sort of, a Tom and Jerry (Wow) situation”

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Luke and Andrew: “There is something about the soul… of a (money tree) credit score”

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Clips From TBTL #2353

Andrew: “And suddenly, one day, that vibe got really fucking harsh!”

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Andrew: “And, I look like I just took a bong hit!”

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Andrew: “Boys, behave yourselves”

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Andrew: “But… holy… holy hairdos, Batman! Am I always that pie-eyed!? Am I always stoned!?”

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Andrew: Chuckling

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Andrew: “During Spring Training, I had a hot dog accident that left a lot of mustard on my shirt. That, immediately stained it, almost like, like mustard… I dunno what their using in their mustard down there”

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Andrew: “I don’t even know what I’m wearing. I don’t even know what I’m wearing. Often, yes, ill fitting sweaters”

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Andrew: “I kind of posted out of anger”

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Andrew: “I was, like, kind of a… grungy, hippy, long-hair… whatever, clothes too big kind of guy”

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Andrew: “I’m-a get me a pair of cords!”

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Andrew: Inhaling, saying “I” and growling

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Andrew: “Is this the future of Sky?”

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Andrew: Making a trying to remember something sound

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Andrew: “Oh, shit, you’re right!”

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Andrew: “One step ahead of ya, Lukles!”

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Andrew: “See, I can’t even associate with that story at all; because, I just, I’ve never had a hot dog related accident that has stained my outerwear.”

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Andrew: Singing “If ever you’re in my”

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Andrew: “Umm, are you spoofin’? You’re spoofin’.”

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Andrew: “What are you seeing when you look at me?”

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Andrew: “You look so wide-eyed and bushy-tailed; and, I’m just, kind of like, you stoned friend… ‘Hey, man'”

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Andrew: “Your business’s new name is, ‘Taargus, Taargus’!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Now speaking of ugly… if people want to see our faces (Wait!) Hey!”

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Andrew and Luke: That’s a Weedle and You’re Gonna Love the Living Weedle Out of This

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Andrew and Luke: “This isn’t about you and Amy Woo starting a new podcast called, Andrew Sux, S-U-X. Which, come on! Seriously, at least spell it out. The name was already taken, sorry. We had to get creative. Two Xs, what!?”

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Andrew and Luke: “You just gave, you just solved a pants problem for me! Wow! Yeah!”

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Luke: “Also, a new segment called, ‘Let’s W-W-W Dot Explain It'”

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Luke: “Get it together!!”

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Luke: “I don’t wanna be jaywalking with Jay Leno. And so, I honestly… sometimes, I’m like, ‘Ahh, I need to put on some pants that aren’t jeans; cuz, then I can wear that jean jacket I like'”

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Luke: “I feel like I was pretty young, but not quite young enough… for the photographer to say, ‘Say, pickle nose!’ And then I said, ‘Pickle nose!’; and then, they said, ‘Did you call me pickle nose?'”

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Luke: “I was like, ‘That sounds like a TBTL drop'”

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Luke: “Like, I felt like I actually heard a little bit of a change in your voice; which… I will point out… is no fucking crime, on a show where we’re talking about things, right?”

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Luke: “Oh, man!”

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Luke: “Okay, let’s imagine it’s a scenario where I actually get to meet Tom Petty himself, one time lead singer of Mudcrutch. I guess I’d just ask him to play a Mudcrutch song… just to show him that really know… what’s up.”

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Luke: “On the show sheet, it said, ‘Pepsi Commercial Stirs Controversy’. Who knew… the emnity [sic] it would create on this podcast.”

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Luke: “Oy, vey”

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Luke: “Speaking of… speaking of beefs”

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Luke: “These are our Def Leppard, Love Bites Live, is mas true, level donors of the day”

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Luke: “This is before I got woke on, on fashion”

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Luke and Andrew: “I… just want to tell everybody, I don’t think that’s the future of TBTL, I mean (Really!?)”

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Luke and Andrew: “Yeah… a man for Dockers. I was a man for Dockers! Write that one down.”

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Luke and Andrew: “You let it take you to edge and even propel you (Right) kind of over, back onto terra firma or… (Right) malla firma. Show title”

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