Andrew: “A bird in the van is worth two in the bush”

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Andrew: “A couple of ‘pologies”

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Andrew: “I am home. The grocery store is home for me”

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Andrew: “I can feel victimized really quickly; and, it’s an ugly, poisonous place to live”

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Andrew: “I don’t even wanna do this show with you right now. I wanna go out and I wanna take some photos”

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Andrew: “I finally found the interesting part of this stupid story. Here’s the relatable part”

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Andrew: “I was there; but, I did not do it”

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Andrew: “I’m a middle-aged… bearded guy with glasses”

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Andrew: “It felt like a drug deal!”

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Andrew: “It wasn’t interesting then and it won’t be interesting now”

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Andrew: “It’s a new year… It’s a new you… It’s a new Dummies”

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Andrew: “Literally… nothing bad can happen”

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Andrew: “Maybe we’ll meet again in this parking lot someday, Gil”

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Andrew: “Poor Jon Greenberg just doesn’t have those ears anymore”

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Andrew: Saying “Charlie bit my finger” in a funny manner

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Andrew: Saying “Hello, everybody. Welcome to Hey Dummies. This is a TBTL newsletter video… Huhhh” in an un-enthusiastic manner

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Andrew: “Yeah! It was weird. He had a very kissable mask”

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Andrew: “You can pull it. You can push it”

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Andrew and Luke: Spoofing around with the name “Piquenaut”

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Luke: “I actually thought the music seemed hotter than normal in my ears”

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Luke: “I know you don’t like me doing it… but, I don’t care”

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Luke: “It’s two lakes to ‘pologize, Andrew”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Like, that’s not how any of this works!”

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Luke: “My boy Lou!!”

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Luke: Singing a portion of “Sabre Dance”

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Luke and Andrew: “No question is… too… sexual… for us to answer (Whoa!)”

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Andrew: “Can I… tell you why I’m supposed to meet a stranger at a mall?”

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Andrew: “Do you consider noon to be morning; or, did I just reveal a lot about my… lifestyle?”

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Andrew: “Dude, you got a debt”

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Andrew: “Either way, I’m going up Tiger Mountain”

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Andrew: “He is hot”

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Andrew: “How about talking about my sexism for a second though, man”

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Andrew: “I wanna know what ‘Rock ‘n’ Roll Tears’ is too!”

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Andrew: “I… hate doing it”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Making a buzzer sound

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Andrew: Saying “Discount double-check” and snoring

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Andrew: “The year was 1976. A young Andrew Walsh was born in Fairview Hospital”

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Andrew: “There’s something about the wild west of Craigslist”

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Andrew: “They’re not effing around… I can’t get in!”

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Andrew: “‘You can’t stop that… rocket arm!’ God, I hate him so much”

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Andrew and Luke: “Talking about f-stops and… doo-dads (Mmm-hmm)”

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Andrew and Luke: “Wait. How many tweets have you written about Jake from State Farm? It’s the only thing I tweet about now… He is hot”

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Luke: “Dude, you’re getting a debt!”

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Luke: “No touching!!!”

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Luke: “Top 10 signs your booty be stankin'”

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Luke and Andrew: “You gotta have an air and a spare… (Right) Obvs (Exactly)”

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Andrew: “Back in the old, dirty days”

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Andrew: “I don’t even know… what windmills I’m tilting against here. I’m just, I just miss Hex Empire”

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Andrew: “It’s kind of a sad day for old Uncle Andy”

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Andrew: “Oh my God… that sounds terrible”

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Andrew: “Okay. I think we’re in the middle of a voicemail”

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Andrew: “So, do you think that I would be better at TBTL if I didn’t huff nightly?”

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Andrew: “What they did is that they discontinued Flash”

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Andrew: “You trucking jerk!”

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Andrew: “You’re going number four instead of going number one”

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Andrew and Luke: “I’m kinda going through something here… I, (Okay) I don’t think it should affect the listeners too much”

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Andrew and Luke: “So, do you think that I would be better at TBTL if I didn’t huff nightly? Yes! I do! If I didn’t huff airplane glue”

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Andrew and Luke: “What is my thing? I need my… I need my (Mmm-hmm) thing, Luke!”

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Jen: “The unannounced line-up promises to knock your fucking wigs off”

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Luke: “No, it was… Randy… I forgot that… I had… had the, the Roomba running on a delay today; and, he came around the corner and it… really scared the living out of me”

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Luke: “So, that was wrong”

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Luke and Andrew: “Things that tell you your booty be stanking. Yeah, right”

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Luke and Andrew: “Wow! Whoa!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Yeah, we’re talking feces, (Yeah) we’re talking about number four”

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Andrew: “Again, a lotta stuff was flying around last night”

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Andrew: “All I have to do is say, ‘insurrection'”

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Andrew: “And, that… is what scares the living shit out of me”

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Andrew: “And, you know, the… dirty secret that I’m not even telling you here”

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Andrew: “Any-hoozles”

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Andrew: “Book it, Danno!”

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Andrew: “Does ‘the luck of the Irish’ mean good luck or bad luck?”

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Andrew: “Everything just feels so garbage-y”

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Andrew: “I just don’t wanna be a part of it anymore”

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Andrew: “I think I may have tweeted my last tweet”

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Andrew: “I… don’t hate that take”

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Andrew: “I’m scared to the scone”

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Andrew: “It feels so wrong… what you’re doing”

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Andrew: “It’s always been garbage”

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Andrew: “Little BG on me… I’m a… cool guy”

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Andrew: “No… I’m not!”

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Andrew: “Oh, you can do that?”

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Andrew: “Our relationship was, sort of, born out of the ashes of the Gore campaign, by the way”

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Andrew: “People can just die if they want!”

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Andrew: Saying “Just love us more, Mommy!” in a funny manner

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Andrew: “Tell me all your thoughts on Chunt”

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Andrew: “This sounds like a… braggy”

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Andrew: “To be miscontrued [sic]“

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Andrew: “Well, I thought maybe you would do it that way”

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Andrew: “Yes, I’m fine, I’m fine, I’m fine! We gotta keep moving! Good, good!”

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Andrew: “Yes! Yes!”

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Andrew: “You wanna talk about… a cat that’s probably on Parler”

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Andrew and Luke: “Hey, it’s your body speaking. I’m gonna slick your hands with… with as much (Yeah) sweat as possible in this moment. What?! Why?”

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Andrew and Luke: “When you… run up against an Andrew boundary… you just run (Yup) up against an Andrew boundary!”

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Luke: “I just shit my pants at a Mariner game”

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Luke: “I will just be absolutely tickled… to be on the air, here on a Monday… morning”

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Luke: “My memory is just so… failed at this point”

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Luke: Singing the hook to “Bad to the Bone”

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Luke: Singing the hook to “Bad to the Bone” #2

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Luke: “Time… is a confusing circle”

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Luke and Andrew: “Nobody… steal my phone; because, it’s (Yeah) more feces than phone at this point (Nobody touch anybody’s phone)”

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Luke and Andrew: “So, if something scared you more than that… I wanna know what it is… We’ll get into that… in a moment, here on TBTL… It was a puppy dog”

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Andrew: “Although, I’m very confused! It’s so confusing, Ron”

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Andrew: “Have an opinion already, jerk”

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Andrew: “I don’t know. I’m confused, Ron”

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Andrew: “I get the petability thing”

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Andrew: “I was just having a thought. There’s no reason for me to bring this up, right now, on the show”

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Andrew: “Interesante”

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Andrew: “Ooo-whee!”

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Andrew: “Really?!”

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Andrew: Saying “Welcome back to the Luke and Andrew Hour” in an old timey radio manner

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Andrew: “Well, it was both easier and harder… on me than I expected”

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Andrew: Whispering “The Whisper!”

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Luke: “Ah, toi-toi-toi”

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Luke: “Chip, chip, peerio”

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Luke: “I’m nothing without David”

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Luke: Saying “Ello, guv’ner” as Bill Clinton

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Luke: Saying “Ello, guv’ner” in a Cockney accent

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Luke: Saying “G’day, mate. You’re about to eat some gun smoke” in an Australian accent

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Luke: Saying “Why… you haven’t even got a gun… But, I have these rise-up lights” in an Australian accent

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Luke: Singing “Last Christmas–Ello guv’ner!–I gave you my heart; but, the–Chip-chip peerio!–very next day”

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