Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2031

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Andrew: “And, I’m a little bit piffed. A little bit piffed. That’s a new thing.”

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Andrew: “Because, yes and! Because, yes and.”

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Andrew: “Hoisted again by our own petard.”

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Andrew: “I always have power outs.”

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Andrew: “I keep forgetting what year it is.”

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Andrew: “Oh, no. This is called pornography.”

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Andrew: Saying “Here we go again with the Andrew!” as Strong Bad

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Andrew: Saying “N-n-no thank you, Mrs. Torrance” as Tony from The Shining

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Andrew: Saying “Previously on Serial, Mrs. Torrance” as Tony from The Shining

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Andrew: “The baton of alienation”

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Andrew: “This is my happenin’ and it’s freaking me out!”

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Andrew: “This is my happenin’ and it’s freaking me out!” #2

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Andrew and Luke: “Gimme, gimme, gimme that. I (Oh, dear God) need it. I need it.”

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Andrew and Luke: “I (Yes. Thank you) put you in this position and I’m sorry, but you can’t say ‘No, but’.”

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Andrew and Luke: “If at any point, did you yell ‘This is my happenin’ and it’s freaking me out!’? This is my what?!? ‘This is my happenin’ and it’s freaking me out!'”

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Andrew and Luke: Luke said something that ruined Andrew’s chance to edit something out

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Andrew and Luke: “We have almost the same exact address. Luke, I don’t want to give my address out on the air, so can you just give me four numbers? Yeah, uh, one, two, three, four. Oh, shit, that’s my real address. Can you give me four different numbers?”

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Andrew and Luke: “Your voice is gonna be different then when you’re just BS-ing with your buddy dude along a phone line, from your boat. Right.”

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Luke: Doing the Strong Bad e-mail intro as Ira Glass

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Luke: “Howdy Doody”

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Luke: “I, one thing I you have to do right now, Andrew, put on some high heels like this moment, and I want you to dance the freaking Lambada.”

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Luke: “I’ll see your, I’ll see your Strong Bad impression and raise you a terrible Ira Glass impression, okay?”

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Luke: “Oh, God.”

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Luke: Operating under a battery of Damocles

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Luke: “Previously on Serial”

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Luke: “This is my what?!?”

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Luke: “This right here, my dudes and dudettes, this is the show that might be Too Beautiful To Live.”

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Luke: “Well, okay ma dudes… and, uh, dudettes. I guess? Sure, that’s how we’re gonna start today’s show, I guess.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Can I see your digression and raise you another digression, I guess? Yes.”

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Luke and Andrew: “It, it takes the file with it. (Right) It, it puts the lotion in the basket, it deletes the file, it gets the hose… all in one.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Mind ya business! Right!”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2030

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Andrew: “And I was like, ‘Ooh, I like Fame!'”

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Andrew: “And it talks about sports too much!”

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Andrew: “And then I had a good cry.”

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Andrew: “Hey, come on. Sean Penn and Kanye West, get your shit together and take a page from our book!”

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Andrew: “Hey, man.”

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Andrew: “I almost Googled it, but then I was like, ‘That smacks of effort!'”

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Andrew: “My God, man!”

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Andrew: Reading text message to Steve Neuman, inviting him on to No Point Conversion

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Andrew: “Tell him The Bone sent ya!!!”

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Andrew: “That would be so hard to do!”

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Andrew: “The lesson here is, never let Luke go first.”

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Andrew: “This is homer talk.”

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Andrew: “Wow! Such a gory accident to result in such a sexy trait.”

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Andrew: “You know”

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Andrew and Luke: Feeling left out of a potential texting session between Luke and the Stu-bot

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Andrew and Luke: “I emitted some sort of noise that I have never made before, and then (Probably from your butt) I got really, really light headed. I was making noises from all kinds of places. (Yeah)”

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Andrew and Steve Neuman: As the football season went on, Andrew’s love for other teams went away and he got crankier

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Luke: “And just giving less and less Fs as time goes on.”

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Luke: “And, God bless my bride Carey.”

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Luke: Bill Brasky and David Bowie

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Luke: “Dude is elusive!”

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Luke: “How, bummed!”

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Luke: “Huh?!?”

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Luke: “I ain’t afraid of dyin’, I already done that!”

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Luke: “I don’t. I can’t. It’s. Did that? What?”

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Luke: “I’m gilding the lily here, folks!”

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Luke: “I’m Tony-ing the Rizzo here, you guys!”

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Luke: “It almost fried the circuitry of my brain.”

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Luke: “It would be rough!!!”

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Luke: Singing “A three hour nap”

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Luke: “We are not enemies. We are friends.”

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Luke: “What, what Sean Penn has created is basically the TBTL of articles.”

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Luke and Andrew: Awwing

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Luke and Andrew: “No! If they want that, listen to (Mike Greenburg) Mike Greenburg! Okay? This is my two hours, Andrew!!!”

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Steve Neuman: “It was so cold, guys. It was really, really cold.”

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Steve Neuman: “Oh my God!”

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Steve Neuman: “So now, you guys want to talk about sports.”

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Steve Neuman: Stages of Grief

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Steve Neuman: “When they were doing the ‘Sea, Sea! Hawks, Hawks!’ chant and people were going ‘Fuck, fuck! You, you!'”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2029: Luke Burbank Edition

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Luke: “Andrew ‘Go Browns’ Walsh”

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Luke: “Andrew Walsh, Man of God.”

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Luke: “Apropos of not very much”

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Luke: “Aww, shit! I had a suspicion this was gonna be difficult.”

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Luke: “But, we’ve been just… Andrew, we’ve been riding on this big blue marble, as it goes around the Sun and we’re all getting older.”

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Luke: “Can you stop infecting the minds of the children of America?”

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Luke: “Fuck!”

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Luke: “God bless America”

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Luke: “Good, we got another Ludacris reference in today, early on in the show.”

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Luke: “I just say ‘Katie Nolan’ into my remote.”

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Luke: “I knew that you were gonna do that, you son of a bitch!”

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Luke: “I’m mostly laughing at that because I’m hungover.”

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Luke: “Is that a thing that people can do or not do?”

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Luke: “It’s full of friggin’ hippies!”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Move! Get out the way! Get out the way!”

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Luke: “Oh God, have mercy”

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Luke: “Pretty much everything they’re doing is my jam.”

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Luke: “Sadly, that’s sort of true.”

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Luke: Spit Take

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Luke: “The co-op is Exxon pouring oil into a vat full of baby seals compared to what this organic place is all about.”

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Luke: “Umm, we’ve got Pod-dog in the background, just, kind of, supervising the whole thing.”

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Luke: “What do I look like, I work at the co-op?”

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Luke: “Who wrote that song?”

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Luke: “You can’t swing a dead cat without hitting something that is vegan.”

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Luke and Andrew: 15th month anniversary is the thumb drive anniversary

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Luke and Andrew: “I decided to pull a typical Andrew Walsh Wednesday on a Luke Burbank Thursday. You went out and got black out drunk.”

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Luke and Andrew: “I’m getting older, but I keep forgetting that’s happening. (Yeah)”

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Luke and Andrew: “I’m too weak and tired to fight you right now, Walsh. It’s just some Cosmic Wheels, my friend.”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke never promised Andrew a rose garden

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Luke and Andrew: “No quit in him. Donovan mode!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Too Browns To Live (Go Browns) Too Brown To Live, I like that.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Wait, wait. Andrew. Andrew lied to me. Andrew said that…Andrew lied to me!”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2029: Andrew Walsh and Stu-bot Edition

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As with the past several shows, Steve “Stu-bot” Neuman left a voicemail message for the guys in the run-up for the Seahawks vs Vikings game that was played on Sunday. Below are three little gems from his voicemail message:

Steve Neuman: “Anyway… Whatever. Later skitters!”

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Steve Neuman: “Hey Luke. Hey Andrew, it’s your boy Stu.”

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Steve Neuman: “Most of the God damn newsletter. There’s another swear, sorry guys. Most of the gosh darn fucking newsletter.”

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Andrew: “Bring me Katie Nolan!!! Oh, please, please, Carey, someday, just walk into the room while Luke is just staring forlornly at his remote control saying ‘Katie Nolan! Katie Nolan!'”

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Andrew: Dejected “Umm, no.”

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Andrew: “Do not write checks with your mouth that your ass can’t cash, Luke.”

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Andrew: “Donovan mode!”

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Andrew: “Gene Parmesan!!!”

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Andrew: “God damn it!!!”

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Andrew: “Hello, Luke Burbank!”

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Andrew: “Is there no place in this long podcast for just a taste of Cosmic Wheels!?!”

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Andrew: “It blows my mind.”

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Andrew: “My face is melting!”

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Andrew: Nose Laugh

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: “This has to stop! What are these guys doing? I hate Luke and Andrew!”

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Andrew: “You’re welcome everybody. No more Donovan for the show.”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew just typed in a cheat code for Mike Tyson’s Punch Out

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Andrew and Luke: “Wait, no, the 70s was way more than 30 years, that was 45 years ago. Fuck! I’m even getting older than I thought!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Well now, it sounds like you’re the problem… frankly. Have you (Calm down) met me, Andrew? (Calm Down)”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2028

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For the third show in a row, Steve “Stu-bot” Neuman left a voicemail message on the TBTL line and talked more about the upcoming Seahawks vs Vikings game. Both Luke and Andrew were wondering when Stu-bot would start throwing down some trash talk about Seattle and/or about the Seahawks; and, well, Stu-bot sort of delivered on a series of “burns”:

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In addition to the “burns”, Stu-bot had this little gem regarding how cold it will be.

Steve Neuman: “It is still gonna be super God damn cold.”

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Andrew: “Ah, that must be fucking nice.”

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Andrew: “But, what are they?”

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Andrew: “Cuz I was wearing a God damn tuxedo.”

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Andrew: “Funny you should use that drop for me today. No, I’m not drunk. I realized it that’s what it sounds like. But, man! Last night, Luke”

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Andrew: “Go faster, scumbag!!!”

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Andrew: “I hope I don’t sound like a shallow bastard. I guess you guys’ll let me know if I do.”

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Andrew: “I love me some bingo.”

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Andrew: “I mean, that would just make me a monster.”

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Andrew: “I respect you as a woman and I know you don’t always get a fair shake in the world, but I need you to do this bench press now!!!”

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Andrew: “I swear”

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Andrew: “I’m not making a joke here. Which wedding?”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Members of the family Solanaceae. I nailed that!”

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Andrew: “No problemo, duderino.”

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Andrew: “Oh, I can eat whatever; because, what are you gonna do, we’re at the airport!”

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Andrew: “Oh, Lester”

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Andrew: “Oh, yeah. Shit.”

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Andrew: “Party!”

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Andrew: “Right. Right, right, right.”

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Andrew: “This, that’s a good way for me to get the last word, huh? We’re gonna move on, but first, I’m gonna lay a bunch of shit on you!”

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Andrew: “We were there to party!”

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Andrew: “We’ll be skiing down mountains of drugs.”

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Andrew: Weird Sound

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Andrew: “Yeah, hah-hah.”

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Andrew: “You’re really good at connecting the dots today, aren’t you?”

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Andrew and Luke: Once you get into the groof

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Andrew and Luke: Singing “They let my dog out. I tipped them at Christmas-time. But I never know how much. Life is so weird.”

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Andrew and Luke: “When I get into a groove where I’m only eating like… A what? Oh, it’s like a groof.”

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Andrew and Luke: Wolfgang Pucking

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Luke: “Andrew Walsh, boot camp instructor.”

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Luke: “But I need you to fucking run!!!”

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Luke: “But, it would be so Andrewian.”

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Luke: “I just want enough money, Andrew, that I have someone to let my dog out.”

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Luke: Incorrectly stated that it was the TBTL’s 10th Birthday, when it was actually the 8th

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Luke: “It numbs the mind and the belly!”

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Luke: “Pod-dog is snuggled in her Pod-dogging bed.”

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Luke: Singing “Working on your night shades”

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Luke: Snickering

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Luke: “Whatever. We’re gonna make the listeners angry.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Hold on, Pod-dog is anxious. (Oh, Pod-dog) I may, I may have to let the dog out, Andrew. Who…you? Me! Okay.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Hold your fire nerds! Hold your fire nerds.”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2027

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Steve “Stu-bot” Neuman left a another voicemail message for the guys regarding the upcoming Seattle Seahawks vs Minnesota Vikings game and the guys played it on the show. Before Stu-bot got into the meat of things, he started plugging Andrew and Genevieve’s “After These Messages” podcast.

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Stu-bot also ended the plug with this little gem.

Steve Neuman: “Get in the ring, motherfucker!”

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Andrew: “And it was the schlockiest schlock you could ever possibly schlock.”

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Andrew: “And then the booze wore off.”

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Andrew: “And whether you’re by yourself or with your Genevieve”

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Andrew: “But, I also don’t like computers telling me what to do.”

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Andrew: “Hmm.”

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Andrew: “Ho!!!”

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Andrew: “I guess so”

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Andrew: “I’m an old man, Luke.”

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Andrew: Laughing and Saying “Oh, God.”

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Andrew: “Okay, good. You know what? We don’t want to get anything wrong on this show.”

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Andrew: “Show me how to movie!”

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Andrew: “Sorry, by the way, if I’m making weird mouth noises.”

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Andrew: “Yeah, I was on the Nicki train pretty early on.”

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Andrew: “You got lucky, Luke.”

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Andrew and Luke: “I came up with a really weird analogy, Luke. Do you like really weird analogies? They’re my favorite kind. I thought they might.”

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Andrew and Luke: “I’m Columbo. (Yeah) Yes. You’re the Columbo of this show.”

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Andrew and Luke: Series of Tom Petty related puns

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Andrew and Luke: “The need to pee. Ah. It’s the need, the need to pee.”

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Luke: “After six, huh huh, Katie bar the door. It’s just all friggin’ Milk Duds and popcorn, bro!”

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Luke: “Andrew, I can’t take it!!!”

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Luke: “Are you ready for shit to get real?”

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Luke: “He’s really the Columbo of podcarting. His name is Andrew ‘Fireball’ Walsh.”

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Luke: “I enjoyed the heck out of this film.”

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Luke: “It may have been, it may have been the alcohol, but I think it was mostly just my, my good taste in the world.”

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Luke: “Life is a stage, and I’m always on it.”

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Luke: “Oh boy, these people are in for a comedy treat.”

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Luke: “Pretending that I know how to movies”

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Luke: Singing a portion of Tom Petty’s “Zombie Zoo”

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Luke: “That’s bull-commander!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Are you ready for shit to get real on a Wednesday? I guess so… I think. I never even went to the movies.”

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Luke and Andrew: “But, then Andrew, you chose to roll the dice with what we have now titled on this show, the Bladder of Damocles. The Bladder of Damocles.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Cuz the thing about the VB6 diet, Andrew, you may not understand is (Oh my God!)”

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Luke and Andrew: “God, I can’t believe I’m even gonna say this. What are you gonna say, is it gonna make me embarrassed? Yeah, probably, for me. For the way that my brain works.”

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Luke and Andrew: “I VB’d hard (Okay) for this cheat night.”

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Luke and Andrew: “I, I know I’ve been to a theater like this, so I don’t know why I’m so in the dark; but, umm, maybe because they turn the lights off before the movie. Oh-ho-ho-ho, God!!! Not bad. Not great.”

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Luke and Andrew: Life is a Stage

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Luke and Andrew: Luke decided to say “bleep” instead of “fuck” for some reason

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Luke and Andrew: Moments Me Senpai

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Luke and Andrew: “You lick the ticket, you shave the beard? Oh, God.”

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