Category: Audio Clips

Andrew: “Hey! Cut it out!”

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Andrew: “I keep referring to it to the ICU… the ‘intensive cat unit’… Not one person has laughed at that. I have not gotten a ‘lol’… I haven’t gotten shit for that joke”

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Andrew: “I was spraying that joke all over the place, like a cat marking its territory”

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Andrew: Laughing in a stilted manner

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Andrew: Laughing in a stilted manner #2

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Andrew: Making funny sounds

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Andrew: Making funny sounds, backmasked

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Andrew: “Maybe this is an obviously thing and I’m not thinking it out”

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Andrew: Saying “I don’t wanna punch you” in a funny manner

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Andrew: “That does not sound like you, man. I listen to your voice a lot”

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Andrew: “That is some Robin Hood shit! I love it!”

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Andrew: “The glass boxes of emotion that they’re in”

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Andrew and Luke: “Burbs (Yeah) and the board”

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Andrew and Luke: Work-related tickle time while Luke and Andrew were in Australia

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Luke: “A rebel… without a care”

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Luke: “And, I just look… just like a big derp!”

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Luke: “Don’t snag defeat from the jaws of victory, my friend”

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Luke: “Hey! Cut it out!!”

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Luke: “Hey! masks!”

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Luke: “I got a lot to say… about apartment living, Andrew; and, what I’m… starting to coin in my mind as ‘pandemic excuse making'”

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Luke: “I love juice!”

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Luke: “I, as a… resident… salute our anarchist overlords”

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Luke: “Nope. Not gonna do it… Not gonna do it… Not gonna do it”

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Luke: “Peace be with you and, and also with… you?”

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Luke: “Yes, yes, yes… Change your apartment, change your world”

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Luke: “You let… Burbs… And, yes, that’s a thing I’m… just doing now, I guess”

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Luke: “You’re right… I’m the kind of… sicko… who really looks forward to a good negoshe [ph]“

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Andrew: “Check that ‘stache!”

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Andrew: “Cry my way through this shit”

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Andrew: “I don’t know if this… is triggering or if I’m a… snowflake here”

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Andrew: “I need you to make me laugh!”

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Andrew: “It’s a real dark show today”

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Andrew: “My brain broke”

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Andrew: “No! Either wear a mask or don’t! But, don’t wear a mask of your own face; because, it’s making me very uncomfortable!”

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Andrew: “Now, I have a feeling that this is gonna lead us into a… bad place”

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Andrew: Saying “I could write a verse for that song, Don” as Donovan imitating George Harrison

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Andrew: “Screw you, Walsh”

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Andrew: “Sorry, lost my words there for a second. I had what I call a ‘Theo moment’… My brain broke”

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Andrew: “Thanks! I hate it”

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Andrew and Luke: “Lord, (Yeah!) if, if I should eat today, please let food show up like mana from Heaven; and, it showed up! (Let an onion bloom in the desert) Right! The burning Bloomin’ Onion”

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Luke: “And, I’m a pretty shady person”

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Luke: Getting mentioned for saying that “Rose City” is a valid way to reference Portland, Oregon

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Luke: “I like… my derpy face being… hidden away from… the world”

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Luke: “I’d like to formally retract my shame that I expressed yesterday”

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Luke: “I’m… more than happy to pass the baton of sadness… my friend”

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Luke: “My brain did what it usually does; which is, it made excuses”

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Luke: “We’re flying in hot for this hottie”

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Luke: “Who thought my divorce was gonna be the least sad news this week?”

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Luke and Andrew: “Andrew, where do babies come from? Mall 205, oddly enough”

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Luke and Andrew: “Dick-skinners? (Beep!)”

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Andrew: “And, so, I’ve… got a combination of drool and cat hair… all over myself”

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Andrew: “Bryan is a flat circle”

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Andrew: “Cuz, I have no beef with Traverse City”

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Andrew: “I don’t know if I can answer this question… And, I don’t wanna be super heavy about it”

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Andrew: “I think he’s having a bad brain day”

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Andrew: “I’m gonna kill this guy”

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Andrew: “I’m not saying the word; because, it’ll come back to haunt me. You’ve… really gotten in my head there”

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Andrew: “It’s pronounced, ‘Dee-chela’ [ph]“

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Andrew: “Lumen… Lu-men… Illumen… Illuminati… Keep an eye out, people”

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Andrew: “My first job was in Concord, New Hampshire; but, it was close to Boston. So, I’d go down there all the time… I had a lady there”

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Andrew: “Oh, how 2020 can it get?”

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Andrew: “She’s a happy, funky, spunky, turkey of a teen”

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Andrew: “Snarky McFarty”

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Andrew: “That’s his only dream?”

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Andrew: “The Burbank and the Pea Syndrome”

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Andrew: “We broke you with this segment”

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Andrew: “What a horn-ball Tina is”

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Andrew: “Wiki-pity-a”

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Andrew and Luke: “I am firing things and, and running a board, and doing various things. It’s not… (It’s a very physical job) Yeah, it’s… Alright. Alright… Snarky McFarty”

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Luke: “I am falling apart here!”

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Luke: “I got a call from the Couch guy”

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Luke: “My Couch is gonna be here… any… moment”

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Luke: Singing “Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack, all dressed in black, black, black”

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Luke and Andrew: “I got a call… from the couch guy… (Mmm-hmm!) Not the Couch guy… the couch guy (That’s Couch Street you’re referring) Yes, that’s right (You’re referring to Couch Street; which is also in Portland) Yes”

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Andrew: “And, I don’t know if USB-C can convert to HDMI; and, that is the coolest sentence I’ve ever said!”

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Andrew: “And, sure as shit, man”

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Andrew: “Cornering you on the xenophobia”

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Andrew: “Digi-tahl [ph]“

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Andrew: “Digi-tahl! [ph] Digi-tahl? Future… Digi-tahl”

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Andrew: “I’ll, I’ll ding it”

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Andrew: “I’m gonna say something… a little controversial here at the beginning of the show, Luke!”

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Andrew: “Oh my God! Is this cable talk?”

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Andrew: “The ‘X’ in Xfinity is for ‘xeonphobia'”

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Andrew: “This isn’t my first Xfinity rodeo, you know”

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Andrew: “What is with you, Walsh?”

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Andrew and Luke: “It’s just, like, so long and… (Mmm-hmm) forever taking!”

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Luke: “Also, I’ve lost a lot of blood this morning; so… I dunno where this is gonna go”

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Luke: “Because of their extreme… squareness”

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Luke: “Cornering Luke on the xenophobia?”

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Luke: “Couch”

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Luke: “Give me the Gould. I want the Gould. Give me the Gould”

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Luke: “I love it when you do it right therr, right therr [ph]“

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Luke: “I swangled by”

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Luke: “Nope… Fifteen dollar set of Cuisinart knives is plenty sharp for Burbs”

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Luke: Saying “I was born in this” in a funny manner

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Luke: “Scar-Crow”

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Luke: “This is what happens, everybody. This is real. This is the sausage”

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Luke: “Those are all the Goulds I got”

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Luke: “What kind of, what kind of cable vibrations are you getting?”

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Luke and Andrew: “I mean, would you consider this premiocre? Oh, on a good day”

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Luke and Andrew: “I’m the reason! (I’m paying for your sins, you son of a gun!)”

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Andrew: “Boy, so many professors I don’t like!”

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Andrew: “Good morning, Luke. I found myself in a bit of a pickle here”

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Andrew: “Have you been… slightly insulted by somebody walking the wrong way in a one-way grocery store aisle? Call me, Andrew, at the offices Walsh, Walsh and Doormat… We are… We practice petty law”

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Andrew: “I do things! I do things!”

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Andrew: “I have never even considered the fact that Ch… be written in… anything other than in all caps, right?”

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Andrew: “I mean, that can break someone!”

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Andrew: “I’m a fish now”

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Andrew: “I’m often carefully slicing tubed meats lengthwise these days”

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Andrew: “Just a blackhole of interestingness”

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Andrew: “Just got a Chunt pick”

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Andrew: “Putting ‘Hugh’ between two Ws is though”

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Andrew: “You wouldn’t have a pot to soup in”

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Luke: “But, today, I think I’m, I’m in the zone, everwody; [sic] and, we are… Everywody? There’s an irony to saying ‘I’m in the zone, everywody’… that is not lost on me”

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Luke: “I don’t have any Chunt pictures, thankfully, in there”

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Luke: “I feel real radio-ish… here; because, I’m standing”

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Luke: “Lower case ‘chunt’ feels… dirty”

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Luke: “SailingScuttlebutt.com”

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Luke: Saying “Why do you make chicken soup without the chicken…” as Jiminy Glick

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Luke and Andrew: “Louis! Louis!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Would you like me to set up a Wikipedia page… (I’d like to see you try) for you? I mean, you’ll have to log into your fantasy football app first… Let’s start with that”

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