Category: Audio Clips

Andrew: “Again… I… I don’t know how business people talk”

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Andrew: “Bring in da Malinois, bring in da funk”

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Andrew: “But, RuPaul just seems kind of cool as shit”

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Andrew: “Clack-clack-clack-clack-clack-clack-clack!”

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Andrew: Drawn out “Home Run Derby”

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Andrew: “I’m not a calendar, Luke”

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Andrew: “In Canada, everybody says things differently; like, they, they like to special”

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Andrew: “Nobody… tucks in their bloose [ph]“

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Andrew: Singing “Glottal through the snow on an one horse open sleigh”

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: “The less I talk, the better… honestly”

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Andrew: “This is driving me crazy”

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Andrew: “This is sponsored shit!”

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Andrew: “This may be more of your… reality TV… ‘Yuuup!’ bullshit”

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Andrew: “Walsh did it! We got Walsh! We got… our first click from Walsh!”

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Andrew: “Where are you? How’d that money treat you? Are you happy now… bozo? You glad you sold grandma’s earrings?”

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Andrew: “Who would… not… stop… doing it”

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Andrew: “Yuuup!”

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Luke: “But, I’ve got a… got some, kind of, real glottal situation”

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Luke: Clearing his throat

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Luke: “Don’t cut any of that out. I want the listeners to know how… hard I am working for them right now… That was just… fifteen solid seconds of me sling-blading”

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Luke: “Glottaling our way through the program”

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Luke: “Good, good boy, Classified. Come over here”

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Luke: “No, no-no-no-no-no-no, no”

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Luke: “No, no-no-no, no!”

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Luke: “Power threat!”

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Luke: “Something’s broken inside you”

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Luke: “What… absolute… lame-wads these customers are”

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Luke: “When I’m driving around B-ham”

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Luke: “Yuuup!”

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Andrew: “Because, the world is a sexist place!”

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Andrew: “Bottomless squirts”

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Andrew: “Goddamn Seattle”

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Andrew: “Hearing people goo and ga and talk about food just irritates me”

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Andrew: “I am a broken person”

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Andrew: “I tried to describe to you… this weird feeling that I get. It’s like, kind of, a tingling feeling, kind of, in my, in my gut… or my lower gutty works”

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Andrew: “I was old before I was old”

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Andrew: “I would assume that I am not… like, a… a model of… where the human race is going. I’m hoping that I am the shit that humanity is leaving behind”

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Andrew: “I’m glad you gave it to me now”

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Andrew: “It is a very nice… precious place”

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Andrew: “No bottomless Squirts… at this restaurant”

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Andrew: Saying “I can’t. I’m fine. I just sound… I sound worse than I feel… but, I think we’re gonna have a fun show today” as if he lost his voice

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Andrew: “That is the toilet”

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Andrew: “There’s no huge payoff to this story; but, it’s just a restaurant story of me being a real… a real grumpus”

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Andrew: “This is a grumpy, old man who does not belong here”

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Andrew: “What the heck!? I know her!”

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Andrew: “You know, I didn’t kill anybody”

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Luke: “Abolish… DACA [ph] Diner”

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Luke: “Clearly… there were some lapses in my Christianity that involved impregnating people”

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Luke: “I’ll have the Macho Nachos”

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Luke: “I’m out!!”

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Luke: “There’s a Hidden Valley ranch party in… his mouth!”

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Luke: “Well… have fun hosting the show, you two. I’m out”

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Luke: “Yes… I think about bopping down to Electric Avenue… and then, taking it higher; every time I’m on Electric Avenue”

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Luke and Andrew: “That picture was taken while he was… crapping… It was most certainly not! It was most certainly not”

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Luke and Andrew: “The Professor… was a woman cat! (Was a woman cat)”

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Luke and Andrew: “Welcome to Playboy: After Dark. That’s right… I’m Hugh Hefner”

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Andrew: “Coming up at 4:05”

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Andrew: “Everything is fine”

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Andrew: “Everything is perfect in my life again”

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Andrew: Funny laugh

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Andrew: “Guess I picked the wrong day to… stop knowing how to read”

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Andrew: “I felt like I did a little Googling around afterwards”

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Andrew: “I have… phantom bin… syndrome”

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Andrew: “I will do a terrible job of imitating this; and, it really bothers me”

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Andrew: “I’m out! I’m outta content. I think you need a new co-host; who’s got… problems to talk about; because, everything is perfect in my life again”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “What a world!”

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Andrew: “More like Xanadon’t!”

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Andrew: “Oh, shit!! That was a WireTap thing”

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Andrew: “Panicky fantasy”

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Andrew: “Ta-da!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Bellingham… City of (I know!) Subdued Tofu Presses”

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Andrew and Luke: “Does she get to snuggle with you, though… in the bed? Absolutely not… Oh my God. You’re wasting this dog! (She’s not allowed on the bed) You’re letting cats on the counters and on the… places where you eat! But, you’re not letting a dog sleep in your bed!?”

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Andrew and Luke: “Leaving Weenus… (Oh, good) in the dust behind us”

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Andrew and Luke: “You, you wanna candle? What, what kind of candle do you want? ¿Diga?”

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Luke: “Ba-ha-manian”

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Luke: “Divide and Concur?”

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Luke: “Doot-doot-doot-doot”

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Luke: “Easy, nerd!”

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Luke: “Like… the thing I think that… that stuck in your craw, Andrew, and mine, too”

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Luke: “Mister… Some… Limited”

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Luke: “Ooga-chaka, ooga-chaka, ooga-chaka”

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Luke: “Pretty good… but, also, pretty weird”

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Luke: “Pretty good… but, also, pretty weird… which is how people usually describe TBTL”

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Luke: Saying “‘Ello, guv’nor!” in a Cockney accent

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Luke: “Sign up for this thing… or else, pipsqueak!”

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Luke: “Two of these motherfuckers are lying”

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Luke: “Well, things already have gone… completely off the rails here at Burbank Springs”

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Luke: “What a weenus”

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Luke and Andrew: “What about… pranking a Shoney’s? I’d prank a Shoney’s. I’d punch a Shoney’s”

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Luke and Andrew: “Whoa! (Yeah. Yeah) Major step (True) down for… (Sure) Walsh and Burbs!”

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Andrew: “Eat a roll and party”

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Andrew: “I better be careful what stones I choose to throw on this show”

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Andrew: “I don’t w–And, I’m not just scared of our audience. I’m not just saying this to be a wiener’

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Andrew: “I guess I was just in a mood for a pastrami sandwich; because, I’m always on brand”

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Andrew: “I’m not just saying this to be a wiener”

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Andrew: “Leave my sketch outta your mouth!”

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Andrew: “Looks like there’s a darkness of goth coming our way”

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Andrew: “No, I didn’t figure that out! Popsicle!”

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Andrew: “Nobody wants to eat a roll and party”

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Andrew: “Oh, no! Get out of my house if you’re dark sided!”

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Andrew: Singing “O… O… O’Reilly’s… Auto Parts”

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: Snorting #2

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Andrew: “Somebody stole my… goddamn… windshield wiper!”

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Andrew: “Way to go, Mom!”

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Andrew: “We had a lot of dumb ideas”

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Andrew: “You’ve… got… to be shitting me!”

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Andrew: “Your pets will look at TBTL!”

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Luke: “And, I’m kind of shook”

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Luke: “Everything that’s said about bowel can also be said about TBTL”

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Luke: “Fantasy depression league”

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Luke: “Get out here and… get… radio hosting”

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Luke: “I just felt like such a… little complainer”

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Luke: “I just started to feel real bad… like… just… kinda woozy”

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Luke: “I’m a basic B”

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Luke: “I’m back in the Bay City… baby”

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Luke: “Like… what… the actual eff”

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Luke: “Luke Burbank with a cold”

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Luke: “Macheted”

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Luke: “Oh, that’s what’s happening up here!”

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Luke: “Okay… I have a… one of my classically terrible ideas, Andrew”

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Luke: “Punk rockers are nice people trying to pretend… they’re mean… and, hippies are mean people trying to pretend they’re nice”

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Luke: Seemingly meowing a hook to a song

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Luke: Singing “Liberty”

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Luke: Singing a hook to a song

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Luke: “So, if it’s been a little herky-jerky on my side”

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Luke: “That’s my ego… ego is just edging God out”

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Luke: “This is a hundred percent the DayQuil”

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Luke: “This is… classic me, Andrew”

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Luke: “Well, I’m gonna keep saying the same thing; which is… usually a good indication that it’s time to move on”

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Luke: When you need the universe to provide… the universe is… your friend with a job”

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Luke: “Would you describe the ice tea as, ‘Twisted’?”

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Luke: “Yeah; cuz, it’s raining like a mofo”

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Luke: “You’re very funny when I’m on DayQuil”

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Luke and Andrew: “Thanks for remembering that it’s always above the clouds… One of my more famous sayings… Whatever”

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Andrew: “Go with me on this. This is another… stretch of a tangent”

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Andrew: “I am a big whiner”

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Andrew: “I am a big wiener”

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Andrew: “I am a big wiener… I am a big whiner… and, I can do the show at nine”

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Andrew: “I didn’t miss a damn thing”

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Andrew: “I had actually… adult work to do”

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Andrew: “I only Google people in a stalkery way”

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Andrew: “It’s a world of T-Pain”

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Andrew: “Oh, no! Everything’s going wrong!”

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Andrew: “Oh, shit!”

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Andrew: “Shep in peace”

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Andrew: Singing “A three hour… slog”

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Andrew: “The three hour slog”

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Andrew: “The Trejo’s out! Hey, do you know if the Trejo’s out this morning? Yeah, the Trejo’s out this morning”

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Andrew: “This is my fault”

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Andrew: “We’re not… we’re not losing an ‘R’; we’re gaining a Cameon”

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Andrew: “Well, that, that… fills me with different emotions now”

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Andrew: “What the shit ever”

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Andrew: “Wow! Did you tell him that you’re a two Ray-Ban family?”

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Luke: “A three hour… slog”

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Luke: “I still, kind of, think PR is… bullshit”

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Luke: “I was the Doctor Rosenpenis… Doctor Rosenpenis, distinguished chair of hotel scams”

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Luke: Luke received a call while doing the intro

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Luke: “My brain is so bad”

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Luke: “Oh my God, is this gonna, like, unleash the beast?”

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Luke: “Trejo no likey”

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Luke and Andrew: Singing “Calling out from Catman’s… Calling out from Catman’s World (World)”

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