Category: Audio Clips

Andrew: “Also, I feel like you’re not hearing me. I don’t want to play pickleball. I want to play squash!”

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Andrew: “Didn’t know you like to get wet though”

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Andrew: “Didn’t know you like to get wet though” #2

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Andrew: “Get your… refrigerator outta my gunkhole”

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Andrew: “How did they even survive?”

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Andrew: “Huh! Soccer!”

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Andrew: “I am going to screw it up so bad!”

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Andrew: “I could do that!”

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Andrew: “I don’t wanna yuck any yums”

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Andrew: “I was pee-peeing and he was pee-peeing. And, we’s both pee-peeing!”

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Andrew: “I’m gonna be so nervous, and my voice is gonna crack, and I’m gonna stutter; but, that’s okay. It’ll be fun”

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Andrew: “I’m just, like, bouncing around bullet points here”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Keep my name out of your gunkhole!”

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Andrew: “Put respect on the gunkhole”

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Andrew: Reading the weather forecast

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Andrew: “Tap-a-tap-a-tap”

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Andrew: “That’s when you just start… spanking everybody with your… pickleball… paddle”

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Andrew: “The Seattle Non-Problematics”

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Andrew: “Wowzers in me trousers!”

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Andrew: “Wowzers!”

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Andrew: “You can hear me just… dying on that sentence”

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Andrew and Luke: “Didn’t know you like to get wet though… Save it for tomorrow!”

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Luke: “Beer me!”

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Luke: “Con-con-ca-cafa-ca-league?”

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Luke: “Did you consider… ‘How to be Groovy in Ungroovy Times’… Carolyn?”

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Luke: “Do you know how many edibles I had on the way over this morning?”

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Luke: “I got in. I got out… I’ve got the receipts. No”

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Luke: “I would be reminding people… that I… in fact, do not like to get wet though”

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Luke: “Keep… my gunkhole… out of your what!?”

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Luke: “KeyMe”

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Luke: “Operation Refrigeration. Goddamnit. It was right there”

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Luke: Saying “This can only end in tears” in a funny manner

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Luke: “Whoo!!!”

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Luke and Andrew: “But, the thing is, TBTL is just the weirdness (Mmm-hmm)”

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Luke and Andrew: “I need to process this… (I’m sure!) at the pace… that my body tells me”

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Andrew: “Boom-boom-boom”

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Andrew: “Break!”

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Andrew: “Hello!”

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Andrew: “I don’t know what the hell they were thinking!”

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Andrew: “I haven’t done it since we moved; because, I’ve been busy”

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Andrew: “I think I gave him such a grumpy, grumpy face”

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Andrew: “I’m a wizard”

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Andrew: “Top of the room to ya”

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Andrew: “Turlet [ph]“

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Andrew: “What’d you do? Did you yell at a kid?”

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Andrew: “You know, the turlet person”

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Andrew: “You’re looking directly in the eye! Don’t look directly in the eye”

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Andrew and Luke: “Oh, wow! You were, you were the alpha Luke for a while. I’m the beta Luke. I’ve been cucked… like (Okay. Alright) you wouldn’t believe”

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Luke: “Beep-beep-beep!”

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Luke: “Happy Cinco de Mayo!”

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Luke: “I am the bad boy of CBS Sunday Morning”

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Luke: “I gotta go in 2 minutes!”

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Luke: “Interviews, as cool now as they were then”

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Luke: Making energetic kid sounds

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Luke: Saying “Anyone says anything about Luke” with a cracked voice

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Luke: Singing “Tweet of the Week!”

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Luke: “That’s your, that’s your grumpy tape!”

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Luke: “The call was coming from… inside the pants”

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Andrew: “A cat is an angel that poops in a box”

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Andrew: “Dude… it’s like 300 bucks. Just get a new refrigerator. What are you doing?”

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Andrew: “Goddamnit!”

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Andrew: “I am such an idiot!”

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Andrew: “I can’t hide my singing”

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Andrew: “I don’t know why I’m pooping on Linda”

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Andrew: “I know how this works… You got to speak first”

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Andrew: “I know how this works… You got to speak first… So, now, I have to take the other side of the abortion debate? Seems unfair, Luke”

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Andrew: “I saw you trying to hide your singing last summer”

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Andrew: “It’s My Money and I Want It Now Field!”

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Andrew: “Now, I’m just gonna say why I’m embarrassed and we can all make fun of me”

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Andrew: “This is awful”

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Andrew: “Ugh! I was stressed!”

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Luke: “A cat is an angel that poops in a box”

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Luke: “But, it feels real astroturf-y to me”

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Luke: “Call 1-888… 888… 88… 88… Field”

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Luke: “It’s impossible for me to know… what Sam wanted; but, it’s not that”

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Luke: Making squeaking fan belt sound

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Luke: “Oh, ow, Andrew! Are you a poor?”

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Luke: Saying “They’ve outlawed Andy times… It’s literally illegal… to be home playing Minecraft, at a club” in a German accent

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Luke: Singing “Everybody razzle-dazzle”

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Luke: Singing “Taking it to the streets”

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Luke: “Permission to get real?”

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Luke: “Yes… I do want some scrubs… A scrub lets you know I work in an ER”

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Luke and Andrew: “Free boat! Free boat!”

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Luke and Andrew: “I guess we’re the plumbers of podcasting, Andrew (Huh)”

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Luke and Andrew: “That’s like a plumber showing up at your house, and doing work, and, then, hoping to be paid for it… I guess we’re the plumbers of podcasting, Andrew… (Huh) in this analogy”

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Andrew: “First of all… I like… tedious little jobs”

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Andrew: “I could be… loud wrong about this”

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Andrew: “I don’t like to give you a lot of cover… for your bullshit”

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Andrew: “I’ll come up with something”

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Andrew: “I’m Group A! It’s my popcorn! It’s my house”

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Andrew: “I’m really Monday-ing out here”

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Andrew: “It’s just human behavior. It’s American behavior; and, it drives me… bananas”

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Andrew: “Let’s sell some shit”

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Andrew: “No… That’s not how that happened”

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Andrew: “Of all of the shit that I can’t remember on a daily basis”

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Andrew: Singing “Sweet dreams are made of this… Who am I to disagris [sic]“

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Andrew: “Sit down. Stay out of the way”

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Andrew: “Sweet dreams are made of this. Who am I to disagris [sic]“

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Andrew: “This is where I’m gonna become a real jerk”

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Andrew: “You can say that in front of my face… and, in front of my back”

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Luke: “Andrew. Earmuffs”

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Luke: Blowing into the microphone

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Luke: “Don’t you know who I am?”

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Luke: “I have not been that humiliated in a long time”

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Luke: “I’m Group B for beta”

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Luke: Making throat clearing sounds

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Luke: “My brain goes to terrible places, Andrew. Terrible!”

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Luke: “Please daddy, no!”

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Luke: “Yep… I see you… I hear you”

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Luke: “You’re just farting through silk; and, I’m standing over here impressed by it”

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Luke: “You’ve started us down a road that I am now taking us further down called ‘not interesting radio'”

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Luke and Andrew: “I call you Walsh-ski behind your back… Behind my back? You can say that in front of my face… and, in front of my back”

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Luke and Andrew: “Oh, God. No, I don’t. Please… (No! I…) Please daddy, no! I’m sorry. In the clear. One more time?”

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Luke and Andrew: “Uhh-hmm! (Yeah) Don’t you know who I am?”

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Andrew: “And, this is where the podcast really… takes a grumpy”

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Andrew: “Are you supposed to stop ’em with your tongue?”

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Andrew: Chuckling and saying “Oh, Andrew”

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Andrew: “Hello, fellow kids. How do you like my slacks? Uh, ew”

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Andrew: “I am… hot dog/beer curious now”

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Andrew: “I can’t talk technology”

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Andrew: “I grew up really frumpy”

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Andrew: “I was never… I was never taught, Luke”

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Andrew: “Keep the Bugs Off Your Glass and the Bears Off Your Ass”

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Andrew: “Oh, that’s my intellectual property, dog!”

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Andrew: “Repo boys becoming repo men”

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Andrew: Saying “Take a bite outta marriage!” as McGruff the Crime Dog

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Andrew: Singing “Garfield-12323”

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Andrew: “That straight up slaps!”

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Andrew: “Ugh! No! What? There are floaties!”

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Andrew: “Whoa! What’s, what’s happening there?”

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Andrew and Luke: “Look at me being smart. Yeah!”

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Andrew and Luke: “There’s nothing dank about this! (No!)”

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Andrew and Luke: Dazzling Deets and Glazzling Gleets

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Luke: “Bears, bugs or ass, nobody rides for free”

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Luke: “How… dare… Jason Sudeikis… even… do… that… to… her”

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Luke: “I feel myself changing”

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Luke: Singing “Doing crack and cocaine… to get high” as McGruff the Crime Dog

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Luke: “Who were the Hollywood wizards”

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Luke: “You got served!”

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Luke: “You know, I don’t wanna yuck anyone’s yum”

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Andrew: “Get a room!”

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Andrew: “God, I love me some Cary Grant! How can you not?”

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Andrew: “Grocery store elevators are just weird”

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Andrew: “I don’t, I don’t know, I don’t know… what words mean; but… I don’t let that stop me”

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Andrew: “I might… I might wanna get my teeth into that”

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Andrew: “If only there had been a sign”

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Andrew: “In podcast space, nobody can hear you scream”

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Andrew: “In the podcast space, nobody can hear… the leaf blower”

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Andrew: “It would’ve been great for the… the eventual march towards palimony”

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Andrew: “It’s a game of attrition, or a pod of attrition, or whatever you wanna call it”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Saying “Uhh… it’s in his house, and her house!” as George Bailey

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Andrew: “She was basically just my sugar mama”

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Andrew: “This isn’t that good”

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Andrew: “What is happening!?”

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Andrew and Luke: “Didn’t you… just… God…damnit! (Yes) Why are we talking about this on Thursday? 9 hours previous, I had been stuck in the elevator, and I… and I decided to roll the dice a second time; because, I figured, there’s no way this has now been broken for all of this time… And, I was right! So, 50/50. You win some, you lose some”

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Andrew and Luke: “How is–How are we talking about this on Thursday!? Cuz, you know, Andrew, I can still surprise you”

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Andrew and Luke: “No. How the hell? How the hell!? And, we talk so much shit on this show… How in the–Literally. (I mean, literally today) Yeah”

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Luke: “Aw, youth is wasted on the wrong people!”

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Luke: “Mary… Sam Wainright’s on the phone”

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Luke: “Tell Bailey I’ll let him on the ground floor!”

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Luke: “That was my grumpy”

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Luke: “Why don’t ya kiss her already, instead of talking to her to death!”

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Luke: “You have no fucking idea, kid”

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Luke and Andrew: “Listen, I’ve been very public about crapping my own pants at a Mariners game; (Sure) but, that was my own crap!”

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Luke and Andrew: “There was a Post-It note… on the elevator… that said… ‘Don’t get on this elevator. You’ll get stuck’ And, I just thought it was a joke. It was handwritten (What!?)”

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Luke and Andrew: “There’s a parable… Andrew… (Hmm?) in the bible… Maybe you’ve heard of it”

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