Category: Audio Clips

Andrew: “1, 2, 3, yank!”

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Andrew: “Aww, I miss Vieves”

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Andrew: “But, it’s evergreen, cuz I’m always complaining”

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Andrew: “But, that was, like, my thing!”

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Andrew: “But, that was, like, my thing… quiz boy!”

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Andrew: “Drinks on me”

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Andrew: “Hell, yeah!”

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Andrew: “I don’t know what he did! I don’t wanna know!”

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Andrew: “I felt it”

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Andrew: “I’m just free and easy out here!”

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Andrew: “If I were to accidentally thwap it on the table”

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Andrew: Making clamping down, clicking sounds

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Andrew: “My frozen hot dog with wires going through isn’t so bad anymore, is it?”

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Andrew: “My story about my… smelly beard is not exactly pleasant either”

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Andrew: “Oh, no!”

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Andrew: “That would’ve been such an Andrew situation”

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Andrew: “The cat stuff is interesting”

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Andrew: “This is admittedly, kind of, a gross thing. I’m not proud of this”

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Andrew: “Wait a second!! I’m wrong!”

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Andrew: “Well, that’s not what we called them!”

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Luke: “Anyone up for some random randiness?”

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Luke: “For anybody who’s composing an e-mail… we got there”

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Luke: “I had to Google it”

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Luke: “Not to go to… Emo Town”

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Luke: “Outta here with that shit!”

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Luke: Singing “Regis and Kathy Lee… They’re as good as two hosts could be”

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Luke: “What a weasel!”

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Luke: “You’ve talked about it!!”

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Andrew: “At the risk of being… more whiny than usual”

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Andrew: “Back hair is still sexy, right?”

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Andrew: “How’s your pin care?”

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Andrew: “I deserve it. I deserve that fanfare”

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Andrew: “I think I peed it out. I don’t know, man”

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Andrew: “I was just spoofin’!”

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Andrew: “I’m actually feeling strong. I’m feeling bold… I’m feeling all Andrew; because, we’re gonna go in there and they’re gonna remove this damn thing. And, that’s all I’m gonna focus on; cuz, I am ready… for this thing to be off my finger, and for my next phase of life to begin”

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Andrew: “I’m just milking the finger, Luke”

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Andrew: “Oh my God! I’ll bet you, I didn’t put ’em on”

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Andrew: “Oh, shit! Did I sent that to you!?”

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Andrew: “The right side of… sexy history”

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Andrew: “Why won’t he tell her!? Just tell her now!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Where mare… Where mare”

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Luke: “I did it, buddy… I did it”

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Luke: “My weird point about the chest hair thing is”

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Luke: “Pepperoni suitcase giving seagulls diarrhea”

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Luke: “Pepperoni suitcase!”

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Luke: “Putting the ‘van’ in vandalism”

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Luke: Reciting lyrics from and singing a portion of “Computer Love”

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Luke: Singing “Just another confusing Monday”

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Luke: “Some people love chest hair… Some people love chest hair less”

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Luke: “This is my bed and I want it now!”

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Luke: “Thunderous thatch of chest hair”

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Luke: “Unpleasantry around body parts and restaurants”

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Andrew: “Bozo, I sent that to you!”

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Andrew: “I like seeing big groups of people enjoying themselves from afar”

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Andrew: “I’m hearing some wacky shit, man!”

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Andrew: “It’s working!”

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Andrew: “Lemme put it this way… It’s like the Palestinian-Israeli crisis, right?”

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Andrew: Make squawking sounds

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Andrew: “Okay, I was spoofing about the bunny before; but, I’m not spoofing now”

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Andrew: Saying “Good luck to all” as a scanner operator

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Andrew: Saying “I remember why this song is on the playlist” in a sing-songy manner

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Andrew: Saying “No!” in a funny, drawn out manner akin to Adam Duritz saying “Yeah!”

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Andrew: “Seeing a big crowd of people getting excited to go into a game, or a concert, or something… gives me life… Thinking about being in that crowd… does not give me life”

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Andrew: “This is why we can’t have nice things!”

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Andrew: “Wish I hadn’t done that”

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Andrew: “You’re mouthing to me that you haven’t finished it yet”

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Andrew and Luke: Bonus material after the closing song

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Luke: “I can see the Moda Center from my front porch” [Edited]

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Luke: “I was… so proud of myself!”

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Luke: “I’m like Sarah Palin, I can see the Moda Center, which is where they play, from my front porch”

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Luke: “I’m such a catty little bitch who lives for the drama”

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Luke: Imitating the HBO ident

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Luke: Imitating the HBO ident and saying “Wow! What was that? That’s something that’ll live on Marsupial Gurgle; and, I deserve it”

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Luke: Laughing and clapping his hands

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Luke: Mimicking what people were saying over a police scanner

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Luke: Singing “Three little billboards… outside of Ebbing”

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Luke: “Wow! What was that? That’s something that’ll live on Marsupial Gurgle; and, I deserve it”

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Luke: “You Googled my dur-dur!”

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Andrew: “Hey, man. You don’t mind me doing the show… topless today, right?”

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Andrew: “I’m flaunting my flout!”

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Andrew: Singing “Bellingham. Bellingham”

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Andrew: “Well, get your own goddamn ideas! That’s what I say”

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Andrew: “Who is… the MFer?”

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Andrew: “Yeah, they’re crossing over the line… assholes”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew singing “Bellingham. Bellingham” and Luke hoping Andrew would have finished it and then sang “A great town to go to”

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Andrew and Luke: “I’ve been cooking up stuff in the kitchen here and injecting it! (Sure)”

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Luke: Doing the Price is Right fail horn

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Luke: “Half a bunga, dude?”

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Luke: “I tried to break out the charmingest Burbank charm that’s ever charmed”

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Luke: “It was toasty”

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Luke: “My boy Stu!”

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Luke: Saying “I’ll go on the radiola!” as Mr. Burns

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Luke: Singing “A great town to go to”

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Luke: Singing “Maureen, Maureen, Maureen, Maureen”

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Luke: “The mask is the closest I’m ever gonna get to a beard”

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Luke: “We’re in a giant… aluminum tube full of farts”

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Luke: “Welcome to Mi-ya-ma [ph]“

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Luke: “Welcome to Mi-ya-ma [ph]” #2

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Luke: “Where in the holy hell is this!?”

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Andrew: “Attention Hudsucker employees! Attention Hudsucker employees!”

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Andrew: “Digital… doo-lops [ph]“

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Andrew: “Do it again! Let’s hear the clicks!”

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Andrew: “Good Boy Doggo”

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Andrew: “I don’t want people… deepfaking my voice necessarily. That sounds… problematic”

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Andrew: “I have been much more dubious about taking strange hand sanitizer”

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Andrew: “I kind of hate shopping”

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Andrew: “I live with someone who’s typing sounds bad to me, depending on what she’s typing”

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Andrew: “I need some napkins! Give me some napkins!”

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Andrew: “I would like to drag this out over more shows”

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Andrew: “I’m a petty person. I’m an angry person”

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Andrew: “I’m gonna be clicking all over the place”

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Andrew: “I’m not paying attention to anything going forward!”

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Andrew: “I’m the captain now!”

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Andrew: “In… the year… of our Lord, 2021, I’m expecting my new mousepads to show up at any moment!”

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Andrew: “It would be amazing to hear what I sounded like if I were smart”

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Andrew: “She’s all about docking life, Luke!”

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Andrew: “That sounded biblical again”

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Andrew: “That’s so sad for the short person”

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Andrew: “The House of Mousepads?”

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Andrew: “To everything, there is a season; and… a time to every purpose under heaven”

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Andrew: “We just have so many words out there!”

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Andrew: “What I’m about to say is gonna be inarticulate… and… unnecessary”

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Andrew: “What kind of a deepfake was that!? That sounded like my voice; but, I know that those words have never come out of my mouth before, Luke”

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Andrew: “What kind of a deepfake was that!?”

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Luke: “Deuces”

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Luke: “If it’s too much glub-glub and not enough glug-glug”

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Luke: Singing “Do ya have any?”

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Luke: “You often snatch Ls from the jaws of Ws”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke is leaning into some biblical stuff

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Luke and Andrew: Luke plays a clip of Andrew saying ‘I got 14 bugs up my bottom’ and Andrew thinks it’s a deepfake

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Andrew: “#DelicaWatch2021”

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Andrew: “Come down here to the bowels of our operation to pick it up”

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Andrew: “Don’t scrape Luke’s car!”

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Andrew: “Get it out of the damn way!”

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Andrew: “I also did the sriracha thing last night, by the way”

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Andrew: “I am so… car blind!”

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Andrew: “I don’t know what this package is”

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Andrew: “I got 14 bugs up my bottom”

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Andrew: “I got a bug up my ass”

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Andrew: “I got a, I got a bug up my ass about your apartment… management”

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Andrew: “I just wanna see the shit that is happening, like, right now!”

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Andrew: “I’m also so sick of, of Christopher Nolan at this point”

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Andrew: “More of a groof when you manage the delif-ery”

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Andrew: “My brain is definitely trying to sort something out”

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Andrew: “Oh, God, yes! God! There’s so much I need to talk to you about”

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Andrew: “Okay. I’m imagining it… Go on!”

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Andrew: “That was the worst!”

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Andrew: “That’s exactly my thought process on that”

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Andrew: “There’s so much I need to talk to you about”

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Andrew: “We’re gonna need a bigger Dazzling Donor!”

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Andrew: “Weird”

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Andrew: “What am I driving!?”

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Andrew: “What?”

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Andrew: “Wow! This is probably the last time I’ll be in this show”

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Andrew and Luke: “God love the dream dictionary people… but, (Mmm-hmm) none of them know how to write”

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Andrew and Luke: “I got 14 bugs up my bottom… About here… In the clear… Linh, you know what to do”

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Luke: “E.T. flown home”

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Luke: “Flown home”

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Luke: “I can tell you this!”

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Luke: “I got 14 bugs up my bottom”

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Luke: “I’m one of the people that needs to use a little more electricity please!”

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Luke: “My driving right now is literally… a major disaster”

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Luke: “My dur-dur!!!”

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Luke: Saying “Uh, sir. We ran out of bread”

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Luke: “We’re never wrong about things”

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Luke: “Well, of course… you being the way you are wired”

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Luke: “You just said 14 bugs up your butt!”

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Luke and Andrew: Andrew denies saying anything about a bug crawling up his butt and Luke thinks that Andrew will edit that out just to mess with Luke

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Luke and Andrew: “I never share my emotions publicly. There’s no venue for me (Mmm-hmm) to talk about my emotions”

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Luke and Andrew: “I’m efforting to be (Yes) more luciding”

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