Category: Audio Clips

Andrew: “Because, I was the manure!”

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Andrew: “Do robots dream of electric platypus?”

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Andrew: “Dude… ya thirsty! I’m coming”

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Andrew: “Elon Musty”

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Andrew: “I was the manure!”

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Andrew: “I’m over it, dude!”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Let the fun begin”

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Andrew: “Motel Two-and-a-Half Star… We’ll… leave the fluorescent lights on for you”

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Andrew: “Oh, my! You have duck shit in your hair”

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Andrew: “Oh, my!”

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Andrew: “Please, please-please-please-please be good news”

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Andrew: Saying “Let the fun begin!” in a funny manner

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Andrew: Saying “Let the fun begin” in a funny manner

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Andrew: Saying “Yeah!” as Adam Duritz

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Andrew: Singing “Everybody’s having a party!” as Fred Schneider

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Andrew: Singing “Let the fun begin” in a funny manner

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Andrew: “Yeah, no. Everything’s fine”

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Andrew: “You see what my problem is here, Luke?”

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Andrew and Luke: “Oh, (Yeah) Counting Crows. I’m over it, dude!”

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Luke: “Carol, hold my beers!”

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Luke: “Did you get the thing?”

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Luke: “Hey, Elena… Before we get outta here, just a preview of tomorrow’s TBTL… Andrew… empties out… 30 packets of sriracha”

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Luke: “I don’t know what that was just came out of my mouth”

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Luke: “Is it possible… bad dreams… are actually… good for us?! (My dream stories are tight!)”

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Luke: Saying “I!” in a funny manner

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Luke: Singing “Do you dream in black and white?”

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Luke: Singing “Let’s give ’em something to taLk about”

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Luke: Singing “That thon… that thon. That thon, that thon-thon-thon-thon-thon”

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Luke: Singing “Tore out a shrub oak and put up a parking lot… Ooooh-dat-dat-dat!”

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Luke: “We dogs even in our dreams, Andrew!”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke’s microphone fell off his desk while he was speaking

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Andrew: “Am I a problem… or a blessing?”

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Andrew: “Big… thick… fat Mariner dog”

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Andrew: “Feeling empty inside? Voting will fill the void”

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Andrew: “I don’t care what you do!”

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Andrew: “I had no idea, until this moment, what the tell they were talking about!”

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Andrew: “I have this weird… condition where I always have to make one extra hot dog; cuz, I don’t trust that, like… you know, two hot dogs will be enough for me… It also… depends on how much beer I’ve had before I’m making those hot dogs”

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Andrew: “I think I’m, kind of, emotionally dead to this round”

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Andrew: “I’m gonna have me a morning hot dog”

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Andrew: “I’m just being really negative here. I’m being real shitty”

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Andrew: “It was a big, fat Mariner dog”

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Andrew: “One of them I wrote in blood, another I kissed with lipstick”

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Andrew: Saying “I hate to go here. I think I’ve alluded to this on the show before” in a sing-songy manner

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Andrew: “Smartrephones”

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Andrew: “This guy, he’s nothing. He’s nobody. He’ll never be anybody! Get him off of the website!!”

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Andrew: “Whoa! That was not me, everybody”

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Andrew: “Yeah, they delivered a big… big… bag of… sadness… to all of us”

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Andrew: “You know, everything comes back to race for me”

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Andrew and Luke: “I’m back in this (Yeah!), baby!”

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Luke: “Often imitated, never duplicated, the original Luke Burbank”

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Luke: Singing “It’s the most wonderful time of the year”

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Luke and Andrew: “Why don’t you put a note on your door that says… ‘Fedex, we are here. Please knock loudly’? Oh… Oh… Oh… A note, Luke? Oh, my sweet child… I have more notes taped to the outside of this building. It’s like a… (Oh my God!) fucking art project out there”

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Luke and Andrew: “Wow! Wow!”

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Andrew: “Anyway… I can associate with your butt situation”

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Andrew: “Click on those babies, baby!”

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Andrew: “I basically do not have a butt”

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Andrew: “I like cootie catcher a great deal”

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Andrew: “I think they’re just, like, kinda dusty buttons… That was… I worked in the adult industry for a while; they called me, ‘Dusty Buttons'”

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Andrew: “I was going around the house saying ‘murder dur-dur’ all day”

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Andrew: “I was, kinda, doing the old upside-down airplane stamp there”

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Andrew: “I worked in the adult industry for a while; they called me, ‘Dusty Buttons'”

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Andrew: “If I start throwing those stones, my… my… glass house is gonna come shattering around me”

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Andrew: Making arm spinning up sounds

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Andrew: “My dur-dur had a dur-dur and they murdered dur!”

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Andrew: Quiet “Pew-pew”

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Andrew: Quiet “Pew-pew” #2

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Andrew: “Ships passing in the barbershop”

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Andrew: Singing “Summer breeze makes me feel fine”

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Andrew: “These bugs are, kind of… rock ‘n’ roll heroes!”

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Andrew: “This… is the reality that liberal cicadas want”

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Andrew and Luke: “Before I just continue on this (God) negativity train”

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Andrew and Luke: Hidden egg or an Easter egg

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Luke: “Beep-beep, ribby-ribby or meep-meep, ribby-ribby”

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Luke: “Flying salt shakers of death”

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Luke: “I don’t hear my voice right now; but, I assume you’re hearing it”

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Luke: “I don’t know if there’s, like, an elitism there” [ed: Yes, there is.]

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Luke: “If you’re a Mariner… try to get a f–king hit”

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Luke: “It’s essentially a cicada STD”

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Luke: “Luke v. His Feelings”

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Luke: “Sartre is smarter… but, Andrew can do-do”

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Luke: Saying “TBTL da best!!!” as DJ Khaled

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Luke: “They’re dancing… they’re swinging their arms, they’re singing… and, they’re just… they’re, they’re pansexual! They’re up for whatevs!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Missing butts and full hearts (Mmm-hmm)”

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Luke and Andrew: “You got a dump truck of an ass! We got there”

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Andrew: “A honking ball of dread”

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Andrew: “Can I play something terrible for you?”

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Andrew: Death rattle

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Andrew: Death rattle #2

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Andrew: “Flying Guy and Metal Fist”

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Andrew: “Here’s how broken my brain is now”

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Andrew: “I had this weird… thought in my head”

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Andrew: “I hear and curse that name many times a day!”

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Andrew: “I mean, I don’t wanna get too bogged down in this”

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Andrew: “I mean, that is my accurate position on butt chugging”

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Andrew: “I would prefer never to be introduced with the phrase, ‘butt stuff'”

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Andrew: “It belongs in a museum!!”

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Andrew: “Luuuke!”

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Andrew: “My brain is bad”

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Andrew: “Oh, awesome! That means that we don’t have to dial up until 10 AM today!”

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Andrew: “Pardon me. I don’t know if you heard the death rattle as I inhaled”

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Andrew: Singing “So you like baseball coladas”

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Andrew: “Slow down, George Jetson”

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Andrew: “Slow down, Jetson”

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Andrew: “Sometimes I worry that I’m too good”

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Andrew: “TBTL 13… The Restraining Order Years”

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Andrew: “TBTL 13: Oh my God… Get Away From Me”

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Andrew: “Take that, Steelers”

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Andrew: “That’s, that’s the TBTL promise”

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Andrew: “What!?!”

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Andrew: “What’s wrong with me, Luke? My brain is breaking really bad”

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Andrew: “You gotta get to 4, man. You gotta get to 4!”

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Andrew: “You know how poisonous we are anyway”

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Andrew: “You know, I was so proud of where I was dropping it”

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Andrew and Luke: “Can I play something terrible for you? Yes. Of course, Andrew! Why wouldn’t you? Why did it take so long for you to ask?”

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Andrew and Luke: “Now, Luke, butte stuff… I (Sure) can get into”

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Luke: “A real… honking… ball of dread”

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Luke: “Andrew! I was hoping that’s what you were going to do. I shit you not!”

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Luke: “Aw, shit… Now you got me”

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Luke: “Boy, Andrew… When I’m wrong, I’m wrong”

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Luke: “Citizens of planet Earth… stevia… is not Splenda… Beyond Burgers… are not Impossible Burgers… There is nuance to this world… that I live in, of eating extremely engineered foods that are terrible for me… Where, I like some of them more than other kinds of them”

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Luke: “Do you take Apple Pay?”

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Luke: “I’ll be high off this for, like, a week”

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Luke: “I’m an Apple Pay man now, like my father and his father before him”

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Luke: “I’ve laughed… I’ve lived, I’ve loved, Andrew”

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Luke: “Legally blin–legally blinding?”

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Luke: “May the 18th be with you!”

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Luke: “Ruuuf!”

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Luke: “Ruuupe!”

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Luke: “Ruuupe!” #2

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Luke: “Shot at and missed, shit at and hit?”

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Luke: Singing “Meet George Jetson”

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Luke and Andrew: “Again, Lord willing and the… the Wi-Fi creeks don’t rise (Mmm-hmm)”

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Luke and Andrew: “And then gives me the packets of Splenda… Which, Andrew… are packets… of stevia!!! Oh my God! I didn’t see that coming”

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Luke and Andrew: Andrew was not happy with Luke introducing him with some butt stuff

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Luke and Andrew: “I had a 1 year old in 1995, (Oh, yeah) Andrew. Alright… Show off”

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Luke and Andrew: “Next year, when the pandemic’s over… we’re coming to everyone’s house and we’re making out with all of you… including your children… (Oh, God!) Okay?”

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Andrew: “Flamin’ Hot Goat Cheese”

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Andrew: “Hey Luke, comma… Can we record the show a little later tomorrow, question mark?”

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Andrew: “How is White Boy Summer going?”

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Andrew: “I don’t even remember! I don’t remember seeing people!”

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Andrew: “I don’t remember seeing people!”

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Andrew: “I have a new sequence I’ve been working on. Would you like to see it?”

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Andrew: “I’m getting hyped”

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Andrew: “Jesus!!”

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Andrew: Singing “Regrets… I have a few”

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Andrew: Saying “Aaron Burr!” as if he had a mouthful of peanut butter

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Andrew: “TBTL 12… Sinking Into Slander!”

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Andrew: “That is slander!”

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Andrew: “The Swordsman of Slander!”

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Andrew: “What happen to Andrew? Did he just have a stroke?”

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Andrew: “You’re never bugging me”

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Andrew and Luke: Saying “Alec Ounsworth… Alec Ounsworth (Alec Ounsworth)” as the Pipe Organ text-to-speech voice

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Luke: “Flamin’ Hot Milk”

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Luke: “Is TBTL worse than malware?”

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Luke: “It’s the Swordsmens [sic] of Slander… TBTL 12!”

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Luke: “Ora-gone [ph]“

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Luke: Saying “Columbus, Mississippi… Columbus, Mississippi” as the Pipe Organ text-to-speech voice

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Luke: Saying “Guys, we shouldn’t make fun of them” in a funny manner

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Luke: Saying “In TBTL… live concert come to you!” as Yakov Smirnoff

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Luke: “Simmer down, Old Gray Lady”

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Luke: “TBTL-a-Thon 12… Not Ready to Let It Rip”

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Luke: “The cuck stops here”

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Andrew: “And, I even cut this part out!”

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Andrew: Doing a softer version of the Walshelm scream

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Andrew: “Drops of Duritz?”

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Andrew: “Every time I get strident, I’m wrong about something”

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Andrew: “Every time I’m strident about something, I’m wrong”

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Andrew: “Goddamnit, Luke. We’re building community”

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Andrew: “I could also just do it”

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Andrew: “I dunno if you’ve noticed, I’ve kinda given up on some capitalization”

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Andrew: “I’m not trying to be, like, a bummer myself”

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Andrew: “It was branded… as ‘Cucking with Sean'”

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Andrew: “It’s Choad Friday”

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Andrew: “So, you’re a young, old adult”

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Andrew: “They saw you as a cuck”

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Andrew: “This is gonna sound real ass-kissy”

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Andrew: “Wait. Can’t he be right and also a bummer?”

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Andrew: “Well, I’m just confused, Ron!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Are you done with your story there? No, I’m not even started. Okay!”

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Andrew and Luke: “J.G. Wentworth… (It’s your money and you want it now) 867-CASH-NOW!”

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Luke: “A, S… D, F… J, K… L… semi-colon?”

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Luke: “And you don’t believe in a therapist”

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Luke: “Either do the scream or don’t do the scream”

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Luke: “I can’t believe people listen to this show”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Oh, shit”

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Luke: Poorly imitating the Walshelm scream

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Luke: Saying “Yeah!” as Adam Duritz

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Luke: Saying “Yeah!” as Adam Duritz #2

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Luke: “That shit is deep, bro”

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Luke: “That’s a bit of a mind-choad for me”

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Luke: “This is not what this show is about… This show is not about airing our business”

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Luke: “What is a quarter of the… a quarter of the butt-end of a block?”

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Luke and Andrew: Getting mentioned about getting some tape of Dave Niehaus from 1987

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Luke and Andrew: “I’ve got the old man’s car. (Right) I’ve got a jazz guitar… (Right) I’m going down to Zanzibar”

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Luke and Andrew: “It’s choad o’clock somewhere! Shut up! Stop saying… (Can that be…) No! It can’t (Why not?) be!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Maestro! Wait… That’s you… Oh, that’s me (You… you scared me)”

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Luke and Andrew: “Maestro! You scared me!”

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