Clips From TBTL #1975: Luke Burbank Edition

Luke: “Andrew ‘Beard Hamster’ Walsh”

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Luke: “Andrew ‘Doc’ Walsh. Andrew ‘Muscle Hamster’ Walsh, it is.”

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Luke: “Balls.”

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Luke: “Dear Burbank and Walsh, I love ya, but you don’t know what you’re talking about.”

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Luke: “Finish… Finish him!”

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Luke: “‘How did you not see that?’ And the answer is, ‘We’re idiots.'”

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Luke: “I felt cyber-bullied today, I was almost cyber-bullied to death earlier today, Andrew. Okay?”

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Luke: “I like how you’re being the keys you want to see.”

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Luke: “I was just going to say, it’s more like the Bryant Park Project was The Yardbirds of shows.”

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Luke: “It was a full service Walshing.”

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Luke: “Our secret has been exposed.”

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Luke: “Ten thousand spoons, Andrew.”

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Luke: “The door is ajar. No, that’s not what it says.”

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Luke: “Today being Thursday the 22nd of October, in the year of our Lord, 2015.”

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Luke: “Unscripted, but at one time scripted, but now long forgotten, podcasting.”

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Luke and Andrew: “How, rude. How, rude.”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke called one of the TBTL sponsors “Matthew Popcorn”

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Luke and Andrew: “Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na… PASHMAN!”

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Luke and Andrew: “So… we’re calling you ‘Balls’ now? (Yeah.)”

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Luke, Andrew and Dan Pashman: “Use the promo code, ‘wrong’ (Right. Right.)”

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Clips From TBTL #1975: Andrew Walsh and Dan Pashman Edition

Andrew: “Ah, this is going to be a bad joke.”

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Andrew: “All I want to do, right now, is press fast-forward and get to the ‘Muscle Hamster’ part of this conversation.”

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Andrew: “Bye Muscle Hamster”

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Andrew: “Err-ver”

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Andrew: Going from being called “Crenshaw” to “Balls”

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Andrew: “How, rude.”

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Andrew: “I am champing at the ‘Muscle Hamster’!”

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Andrew: “I am dying to talk about ‘Muscle Hamster’.”

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Andrew: “I don’t think you can do much better than ‘Beard Hamster’.”

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Andrew: “I don’t want to even open this door, right now.”

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Andrew: “I just feel like you just go around starting fights.”

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Andrew: “I keep touching the screen, but Luke isn’t responding.”

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Andrew: “I’m just bragging now. I have a lot of friends and a lot of dinners.”

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Andrew: “It’s so good!”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “No can do, brotherino. Right.”

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Andrew: “So, smooth. So, smooth.”

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Andrew: “That’s a huge problem with this e-mail and I love you Richard, I think.”

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Andrew: Trying to imitate a weird instrumental song by Lick The Tins

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Andrew: “Umm, there’s a better word for kerfuffle. Umm, I couldn’t think of Peter Sagal’s name before, so I’m probably not gonna be able to think of a better word.”

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Andrew: “What?!?”

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Andrew and Luke: “Jar Jar takes up a lot of space right now… How, rude. How, rude.”

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Dan Pashman: “Bye Tapioca!”

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Dan Pashman: “Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na… PASHMAN!”

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Dan Pashman and Andrew: Andrew’s nickname will have to be “No Balls” if he orders bubble tea without tapioca balls

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Dan Pashman and Andrew: Dan Pashman had been (and probably will be called) “Uncy Pash”

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Dan Pashman and Andrew: Saying good-bye to each other

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Dan Pashman, Andrew and Luke: “The path to pilot success runs through TBTL. (Mmm-hmm) Thank you.”

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Dan Pashman and Luke: Dan Pashman has very few muscles, but a lot of hamsters

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Clips From TBTL #1974: Luke Burbank Edition

Luke: “And you’re getting five stars… out of ten!”

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Luke: “And, to be honest with you, I kind of had to get away from the cable guy.”

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Luke: “Did I say Tom Hanks?!?”

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Luke: “Either, I’m sorry or, I knew that!”

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Luke: “Hey, right on Mom! You know what? I’m going to put the bong down because this font is so accessible.”

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Luke: “I am, as always, kept company by a, sort of, at this point, depressed, I would think, yellow Lab.”

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Luke: “I will admit that I’m a little bit creased, right now.”

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Luke: “I’m near something called ‘Northwest Behavioral’. That doesn’t sound good.”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: Laughing #2

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Luke: “Let me just lay out the scene for you.”

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Luke: “Location, location… Watch out!!!”

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Luke: “Oh my God!”

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Luke: Reproducing the sounds that the cable guy made after getting splinters

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Luke: “See how I’m learning? It’s cuz all of that time I’ve been spending at Northwest Behavioral!”

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Luke: “So, don’t you worry, regular listeners. There will be some kind of audio issues, probably, throughout the broadcast. Let me just lay out the scene for you.”

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Luke: “That is pure, uncut Zemeckis”

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Luke: Therapist Friend Zone

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Luke: “To correct his family”

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Luke: Turf Tenders™

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Luke: “Walsh for the win!”

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Luke: “We will do all of that just as soon as we say Howdy Doody to this guy. He’s a real Howdy Doody.”

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Luke: “Well, I never know when I’m gonna get into a pickle.”

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Luke: “Weren’t we supposed to have hover boards by now?”

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Luke: “You know what, Andrew? That’s a good point. That’s a really good point.”

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Luke and Andrew: Andrew asks if bubble tea is the vaping of beverages

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Luke and Andrew: “How about ‘Holy Catfish!’? (Holy Catfish!)”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke accidentally said Tom Hanks instead of Tom Cruise while describing a Mission Impossible-type scenario

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Luke and Andrew: “That would be like, what Kah-pho-ky Fried Chicken? Kah-pho-key Friend Chicken. Exactly.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Today’s top story, you can hear the excitement in my voice (God, Luke!) is that it’s Back To The Future Day.”

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Luke and Andrew: “You know what they say, ‘Location, location… Watch out!!!’ There’s our second show title.”

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Clips From TBTL #1974: Andrew Walsh Edition

Andrew: “Cut my legs off and call me Shorty.”

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Andrew: “Damn it!”

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Andrew: “God, Luke!”

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Andrew: “I always have an issue with that, because I’m a rentor [sic].”

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Andrew: “I haven’t been copied on those, but keep sending them folks.”

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Andrew: “I like ‘Good Gravy!’, that’s my takeaway. Why am I not saying ‘Good Gravy!’ more often?”

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Andrew: “I swear to God, they must be in the pocket of deep Kleenex or something; because, that shit is sad!”

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Andrew: “I’m not trying to make you feel bad. I just think…we need to start the show over.”

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Andrew: “It was a really sad movie, and I’m gonna tell you, it rained on my face a couple of times.”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing #2

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Andrew: Laughing #3

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Andrew: Laughing and Saying “There’s our second show title”

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Andrew: “Oh, I thought you just wanted me to talk about the font.”

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Andrew: “Yeah.”

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Andrew: “Yeah, I need to stop playing Minecraft and go out and do something with my life. Of course, I think that a lot.”

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Andrew: “You have the emotional crinkles today, Luke.”

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Andrew: “You’re velcome!”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew is wondering if Luke is rearwindowing potential car thieves again

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew makes a good point regarding Luke and the self-talking cable guy, but want to start the show over

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew questions how TBTL would be if he talked less and Luke liked the Mary Steenburgen talk

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Andrew and Luke: Luke’s joke was bad, but not “You’re velcome!” bad

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Andrew and Luke: Mary Steenburgen

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Andrew and Luke: “No more Minecraft for me. (Right.)”

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Clips From TBTL #1973

Andrew: “Above ground pool, below ground dream?”

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Andrew: Attempting to make the Law & Order “Dun-Dun” sound

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Andrew: “I blew it.”

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Andrew: “I didn’t make it up!”

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Andrew: “Let’s move on, I can’t even get into that.”

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Andrew: “Next thing you know, it’s a whole Twitterversy!”

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Andrew: “The force is weak with this one.”

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Andrew: “There’s no swimming in my play!”

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Andrew: “You rented, that’s great!”

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Andrew: “You’re adding that, that je ne sais burp.”

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Andrew and Luke: “That’s poochie Yoda. That’s poochie Yoda!”

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Luke: “Ah, well shit! Now the cat’s out of the bag. Gosh darn it, that’s on me.”

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Luke: “Andrew ‘Hodor Hollywood’ Walsh”

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Luke: Attempting to make the Law & Order “Dun-Dun” sound

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Luke: “Buh-nuts”

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Luke: Doing what he thinks is a David Lee Roth scream, but it’s from The Who

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Luke: “Don’t take that growling from Rudy to mean anything guys, she’s just having a dream.”

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Luke: “Dun-dun. Oh yeah.”

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Luke: “Dybbuk, Schmybbuk”

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Luke: “#BasementLife”

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Luke: “There are, there are hundreds of thousands of reasons and all roads lead to cancer; so, bad news for Rudy.”

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Luke: Tiny little burp

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Luke: “What the fuck.”

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Luke: “Which is good stuff, real good stuff.”

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Luke: “You know? At this point, Andrew, I’m used to it. I’m used to my amazing transitions…just getting stepped on.”

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Luke and Andrew: Andrew corrects Luke by calling the scream he is doing is actually from The Who

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Luke and Andrew: Both doing The Who’s scream

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Luke and Andrew: “He surfs in on a wave in Dagobah system, just a big fucking hang ten in a swamp wave. Oh man, pitted. It is so pitted.”

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Luke and Andrew: Humming-while-pondering sound and Luke saying “You’re sort of, let’s see”

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Luke and Andrew: “I ate my entire salad during that song. Really?!? Yeah. Hope it was a small salad.”

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Luke and Andrew: It’s unnatural that plastics and cans can be recycled together

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Luke and Andrew: Listeners are following Andrew’s footsteps by using the word “shirty”

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Luke and Andrew: “The amount of splinters in that dog’s… you know (Face?)… Number two. Oh. Oh!”

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Luke and Andrew: TMI regarding changes in night peeing

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Luke and Andrew: “What the fuck. Who put a Yoplait lid in here!?! Shut it down! The whole thing’s shut down.”a

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Clips From TBTL #1972

Andrew: “Aww, come on, talk to me! I’m a lonely old man, I’ve got a lot of witticisms.”

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Andrew: “Bite my shiny metal football.”

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Andrew: “Childhood is scary as hell, man.”

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Andrew: Chuckling

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Andrew: Chuckling #2

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Andrew: “Do you want the vinegar or the Apple Pay?”

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Andrew: “God, I love that woman so much.”

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Andrew: “I like the computers talking to each other.”

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Andrew: “I read this and I’m just so glad that he’s alive today.”

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Andrew: “I would never get between a man and his comfortable chair.”

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Andrew: “I’m gonna get my S together.”

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Andrew: “It’s gonna come to me when I stop trying so hard.”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing #2

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Andrew: “Laughing my ass off. Just like, bark laughing.”

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Andrew: “Oh, Luke.”

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Andrew: “Oof. Yeah.”

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Andrew: “That was pretty good.”

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Andrew: “That’s his only dream?”

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Andrew: “That’s just, kind of, the old man in me.”

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Andrew: “This is one of the most moving e-mails I think I’ve ever read on TBTL.”

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Andrew: “Today, the shirt that I came home in was… well, this is just gross!”

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Andrew: “Yeah!!!”

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Andrew: “You can get Bible Hub to fight with itself, like a snake eating its tail or a bird attacking a mirror sort of.”

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Andrew: “You put your oranges down in the bagging area. Wait, one of the oranges moved! Cancel the whole thing. Call the National Guard!”

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Andrew: “Your cash is down there, bro.”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew mistakenly called the show damp, not the sweaty shirt he was wearing

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Andrew and Luke: “Bite my shiny metal football. Ha-ha! That’s a possible show title.”

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Andrew and Luke: “Does it involve a sweaty shirt? No! If it doesn’t involve a dirty shirt, then I’m probably not gonna be mad. I’ve already ruined the show.”

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Luke: “Above Ground Pool, Below Grounds Dream: The Andrew Walsh Story”

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Luke: Banging sound in the background of Luke’s recording

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Luke: Cute Chuckle

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Luke: “I do not agree with that little punk.”

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Luke: “Like, if they are sleeping, then it’s just like, game on.”

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Luke: “No kitchen countertop is an island.”

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Luke: “Paid. Boom.”

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Luke: Reciting from Matthew 9:17

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Luke: Saying “Feed me!” a la Seymour from “Little Shop of Horrors”

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Luke: Simulating a grocery story self-checkout machine going into theft-prevention mode

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Luke: “So, long story longer.”

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Luke: Trying to recite lyrics from Elvis Costello’s “Veronica”

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Luke: “Well, yeah. They’d have to, they’d have to also have to have my thumb. I mean, I can get you a thumb.”

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Luke and Andrew: Bender is the Cleveland Kardashian Browns’s first draft pick for the 2080 Robot Football League

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