Andrew: “Give me a… nude vole”

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Andrew: “God, I love pettiness and spite so much!”

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Andrew: “I don’t know if I’m being especially thick”

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Andrew: “I hate cleaning!”

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Andrew: “I have… a lotta trouble saying that word; yet, it’s one of my favorite words”

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Andrew: “I like to mumble and grumble to myself”

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Andrew: “I refuse to say something more on this topic; because, I clearly don’t know what I’m talking about”

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Andrew: “I was very mumble-mouthed… earlier”

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Andrew: “It belongs in a museum!”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Making ghoul sounds

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Andrew: “Man cannot live like this. Man and woman cannot live like this”

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Andrew: “Oh, I shame people”

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Andrew: “Oh, no! Was I duped again!?”

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Andrew: “Oh, okay. I can sparkle for a week or two”

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Andrew: “We don’t talk about the divorce… Luke”

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Andrew and Luke: “I do miss (Yeah) smells, man”

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Luke: “Am I clean, Mommy?”

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Luke: “Cuz, there’s a lot of Zooming that happens in this room”

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Luke: “Good morning, my bassassin friend”

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Luke: “I don’t even know what my face is doing under that mask”

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Luke: “It’s a couch. It’s a bed. It’s a couch. It’s a bed. It’s like, ‘No, it’s a bed'”

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Luke: “Maybe Luke isn’t such an idiot”

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Luke: “Sometimes we crash into each other… just to feel something… or, whatever”

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Luke: “Sometimes we mispronounce ‘Heinz’… just to feel something”

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Luke: “Suck on that, Anish Kapoor”

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Luke: “Yeah, I’m gonna mount it”

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Luke and Andrew: “Get a new bit, Burbank! (Oh my God)”

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Andrew: “I can’t fall asleep again”

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Andrew: “I started thinking of… of pornography jokes”

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Andrew: “I was good to you, Ben!”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Now I’m the Balding Bassassin”

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Andrew: “Okay. So, we got our Ps down. That’s good”

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Andrew: “This is where I fall asleep”

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Andrew: “Whatever puts you to sleep, buddy”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew yelling and Luke saying “Wow. And, you don’t believe in God”

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Luke: “I grew up feral”

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Luke: “Pussy Mc… McFaceButt”

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Luke: “That’s one doodle that can’t be un-did, home skillet”

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Luke and Andrew: “Andrew. What? Octopussy… Oh, nice!”

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Luke and Andrew: Laughing

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Luke and Andrew: “You know, I have a theory that I was partially responsible for that film… No; but, I’m not surprised… Wait a minute! Now, wait just a darn minute!! What!?”

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Andrew: “Aw… barbecue sauce!? No way, man! I’m a…”

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Andrew: “Before I dip my toes in these waters; where, my toes really… do not belong”

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Andrew: “Get ’em, boys!”

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Andrew: “God willing and the… COVID don’t rise”

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Andrew: “I do not abide that… at all!”

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Andrew: “I feel a little mumble-mouthed”

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Andrew: “I wish I hadn’t said that”

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Andrew: “I’ll turn it up a thousand notches if I have to!”

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Andrew: “I’m better than you. I can stand here without looking at my phone”

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Andrew: “I’m not, like, going into teriyaki madness”

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Andrew: “I’m probably an alien in Andrew’s body”

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Andrew: “It’s just how it’s coming outta their bodies. Bah-odies. [ph] Sorry”

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Andrew: “Meh! Meh!”

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Andrew: “Meow! Meow!”

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Andrew: “Oh, are you gonna be okay, Bananas?”

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Andrew: Saying “Oh, if you don’t feed me now, I just don’t know if I’ll have the energy to go on. Meow” in a soft and gentle manner

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Andrew: Soft and gentle “Meows”

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Andrew: “Theo… I will punt you like a football”

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Andrew: “Well… no! I think… I think… we should all drive slow in the fast lane! No, I’m gonna take the other side on that!”

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Andrew: “Yeah, it’s why they make ’em so cute. Otherwise, they would just annoy you to death and you’d throw ’em out the window”

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Andrew: “Yester…doodle”

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Andrew and Luke: “You have the soul of a redhead, Luke… Thank you”

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Andrew and Luke: “You know what just occurred to me, Lucas? What, Andres?”

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Luke: “I love nothing more than a good stare”

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Luke: Saying “Weird!” in a funny manner

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Luke: Singing “Don’t go dipping water toes”

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Luke: Singing “You lift me up”

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Luke and Andrew: “We’re boring; but, we come by this honestly. Yeah, exactly”

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Luke and Andrew: “Would that make you believe in God? No”

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Andrew: “Dazzling Dough-nors”

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Andrew: “Did I say, ‘What’s happa me’?”

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Andrew: “Eugh… Somebody made a number three”

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Andrew: “I don’t know how they did any of this”

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Andrew: “I say a lotta stupid shit on this show a lot”

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Andrew: “I was a mere TBTL babe at this point”

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Andrew: “Not all the insurance companies have to out-weird each other”

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Andrew: “Now, my head really hurts; and, I’m taking this in a really weird place”

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Andrew: Saying “Are you not having a wonderful… time?” in a funny manner

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Andrew: Saying “It’s embarrassing cuz I had the books before I ever watched the movies!” in a funny manner

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Andrew: “They call me, ‘Paulie Walshnuts'”

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Andrew: “Well, I’m no Roy Donk”

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Andrew: “Why am I even doing this?”

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Luke: Making an airhorn sound

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Luke: Singing “Woke up this morning and got some gabagool” to Paul McCartney’s “Wonderful Christmastime”

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Luke: “What a dingus”

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Luke: “Where’s the… gabagool?”

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Andrew: “I have… submitted TBTL for… The Ambien Awards: podcasts that put you to sleep”

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Andrew: “I’d rather somebody else read me to sleep; and, Genevieve won’t do it”

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Andrew: “I’m the smart one in the room here”

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Andrew: “It sucks!!”

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Andrew: “Lemme get very specific and relatable here”

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Andrew: Saying “Look into your heart!” in a funny manner

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Andrew: Saying “Please!” in a funny manner

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Andrew: Saying “Please!” in a funny manner #2

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Andrew: “Sucking in as much information as possible”

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Andrew: “The best moment in TBTL history is when Andrew when down to Portland and throttled Luke”

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Andrew: “The lie is built into the system”

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Andrew: “There’s so much work involved!”

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Andrew: “There’s so much work involved! Man… I don’t wanna do that!”

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Andrew: “Usually, I read myself to sleep”

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Listener Joey: Singing “The Right Way to Remember the Wrong Kinda Night”

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Luke: Getting mentioned for sending in a supercut of Luke saying “Heinz” from a CBS Sunday Morning segment on ketchup

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Luke: “I also have a shitload of privilege”

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Luke: “I just have lost all chill with that term”

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Luke: “Shooting from the seat of my pants”

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Luke: “Mount Douche-more”

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Luke: “Ori-gone [ph]“

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Luke: “Ori-gone [ph]” #2

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Luke: “Ori-gone [ph]” #3

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Luke: “Ori-gone [ph]” Supercut

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Luke: “Ori-gone? [ph]“

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Luke: “Pew-pew-pew”

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Luke: Saying “Pretty… pretty… pretty… pretty good” as Larry David

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Luke: “Shooting from the seat of my pants”

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Luke and Andrew: “Andrew, do you know that… honestly… at least 80 to 90 percent of this show, I’m just, you know… I’m shooting from the seat of my pants here… Yeah; but, what about the stuff you’re saying? That’s… that’s shooting into the seat of my pants”

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Luke and Andrew: “I’m not convinced Portland, Maine is a real place. Okay, there’s your answer”

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