Tag: Andrew Walsh

Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2178

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Aaron Mason: Going nuts after losing the quiz

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Aaron Mason: “Hope you like toast!”

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Aaron Mason: “I’m gonna go, Potter!”

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Aaron Mason: “I’m here to compete!”

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Aaron Mason and Andrew: “Is this a good time to bring up the fact that I’ve lined the studio in plastic à la Dexter; because, I’m here to murder Sean. Oh, man! (Ba-boom!)”

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Aaron Mason, Andrew and Sean: Semi-colon and Semi-point

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Andrew: “Buttons are hard to push.”

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Andrew: “Damn it, I messed it up again!”

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Andrew: “Hold on, I’m in a middle of story.”

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Andrew: “I am so bad at quizzes. Why do I like them so much?”

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Andrew: “I get it!”

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Andrew: “I never did pull tabs. I did it once with Luke, but I was just like pulling his… tabs.”

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Andrew: “I want you to be your own man.”

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Andrew: “I’m trying!”

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Andrew: “Kind of. I’m just a weirdo.”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing #2

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Andrew: “Listeners, how are you guys doing? We’re doing good! Oh, great.”

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Andrew: “Oh, shoot!”

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Andrew: “Oh, yeah!”

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Andrew: “So much jive turkey gobbling about to happen right here on TBTL.”

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Andrew: “TBTL is, was, and ever shall be Too Beautiful To Live.”

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Andrew: “There’s a radio show called ‘Says You!’. It is the dorkiest public radio quiz show you can imagine; and, I love it!”

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Andrew: “This is what we call a ‘power out’ in the business.”

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Andrew: “We do have Ask Sean Anything, or maybe Ask Sean Almost Anything. Umm, which I guess would be AS-Aaaaaah.”

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Andrew and Sean: “Ooh! Oh! Mmm! Mmmh! Ahhh! (Before I get into the…) Whoa!”

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Andrew and Sean: “Or, just each flower has its own cycle. Dunno. Okay, more questions than answers. Are we talking about menses now? Oh, let’s move on.”

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Andrew and Sean: “This is a quiz called, ‘Harry Planter’. That sounds bad. Yeah.”

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Andrew and Sean: Wah-Wah

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Andrew, Aaron Mason and Sean: Aryan Mason

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Andrew, Sean and Aaron Mason: Sean and Aaron kept interrupting Andrew’s intro to the “Is This a Plant or Is This a Harry Potter Character?” game

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Sean: “Bagel, Beagle, Boggle, Boogle, Baggle”

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Sean: “Cadmus. Cadmus makes me think of Cadbury, which makes me think of eggs, which makes think of bunny rabbits, which makes me think of Harry Potter!”

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Sean: “Can we just edit all that out?”

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Sean: “Harry Planter”

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Sean: “I try to say, ‘Squiggle less,’ it’s like, ‘No, squiggle more!'”

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Sean: “I’m using the word terrarium very loosely; because, we didn’t make any G-D terrariums that day. We essentially made plants in glass vessels.”

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Sean: “I’m winning at life, boys.”

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Sean: “It’s a sexy jam for the sexy hams out there.”

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Sean: “My brain, sometimes, doesn’t work!”

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Sean: “My Cream of hWheat”

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Sean: “Oh my God”

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Sean: “You were up crap stream without a paddle.”

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Sean and Aaron Mason: “Aryan Mason. No!!!”

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Sean and Andrew: “And, that would be Andrew Walsh, the picky eater. Exactly.”

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Sean and Andrew: “Bringing up some memories! (What is that?) Like the corners of my mind!”

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Sean and Andrew: “I’m gonna have to tune into that. Do not!”

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Sean and Andrew: “That’s B-A-N-A-N-A-S. That’s, that’s bananas. That is bananas.”

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Sean and Andrew: “Well, I don’t eat a lot of ice cream because I’m lactose intolerant. I just can’t tolerate you (Yeah, and you shouldn’t) anymore. Get out of my house.”

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Sean and Andrew: “You see my thumb? It’s hella green, bro! It actually… Actually, that’s just the… That’s spinach. That’s spinach, yeah.”

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Sean, Andrew and Aaron Mason: “There’s a John Stamen. There is… Can you lose a point for that?”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2177

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Aaron Mason: “I’m a strong flavor, right? I’m like licorice.”

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Aaron Mason: “It gets in my craw!”

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Aaron Mason: Laughing

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Aaron Mason: “LRB is after me. It’s a whole scene.”

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Aaron Mason: “Milk, He Wrote?”

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Aaron Mason: “Oh, God!”

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Aaron Mason: “Squirrel!”

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Aaron Mason: “Three, two, one. One, two, three. What the heck is bothering me.”

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Aaron Mason: “Toughen up, buttercup!”

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Aaron Mason and Andrew: “And, I mean Luke has rebuilt an engine. Not Burbank. Not Burbank. I know for a fact, first hand, that he cannot rebuild engines. I’ve been on a broken boat with him. Yeah.”

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Aaron Mason and Andrew: “Come on!!! I made your bed.”

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Aaron Mason and Andrew: “To wrap it all up, it’s you, baby! (Yeah, I guess so) You are! You’re thin-skinned! (Yeah) You get upset (Oh, God) when people…Like, we know that. It’s fine. It’s probably not fine.”

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Andrew: “Alright, you guys… Here’s everything you need to know about the next hour of your life. You are listening to a podcast called TBTL; which, stands for: Too Beautiful To Live”

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Andrew: “Big booming voice”

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Andrew: “Cut that out. That’s not what words mean.”

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Andrew: Describing who and what Luke and Andrew are and do on the show

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Andrew: “I am such a baby.”

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Andrew: “I like it. It kind of got this hand-clappy, boot-stompy feel to it.”

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Andrew: “I went home and I bit my pillow.”

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Andrew: “I’m not famous for anything, but I can eat a lot of hot dogs in one sitting.”

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Andrew: “If I listen to Andrew describe music one more time, I’m gonna drive my car off a cliff!”

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Andrew: “If this person talks like this; but, I’m in the voice. I’m committed at this point to it.”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Milk, She Wrote”

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Andrew: “Scuttling it up with my whining.”

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Andrew: “Slash man-boy”

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Andrew: “You know, the good news is, we don’t have any listeners who like to Photoshop me into weird scenarios. So, I’m sure that’ll never happen.”

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Andrew and Aaron Mason: “Aaron, how the hell are you doing? I’m doing great. First of all, I go by Aidan now. I’ve changed it. So guilty. You really stepped in it yesterday, didn’t you? Boy, howdy.”

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Andrew and Aaron Mason: “Have you been naked there? Nnnnnnno. No.”

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Andrew and Aaron Mason: “How dare you question whether or not we’ll deliver on our Goddamn… Who are you!?! (Rawwwr) Is what I said.”

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Andrew and Aaron Mason: “I don’t, so I won’t. I don’t, so I won’t!”

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Andrew and Aaron Mason: “I got real Jessica Fletcher on his ass yesterday. That’s a show title. Milk, He Wrote? That’s the show title!!! Milk, She Wrote. I don’t have a pen.”

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Andrew and Aaron Mason: “I got the paper rattle thing, what do you call it? Oh, Shuffling Papes! I got the Shuffling Papes (What’s up, Bobby!) today.”

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Andrew and Aaron Mason: “Nothing like a fat, full guy scooting (Angrily) home, angrily… I’m gonna write a Yelp! review.”

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Andrew and Aaron Mason: “Remember: No mountain too tall, and good luck to all!”

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Andrew and Aaron Mason: “There are dozens of us. However… (Dozens!)”

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Andrew, Aaron Mason and Ron Upshaw: Ron Upshaw crashed the TBTL show recording

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Ron Upshaw: “Can, can people Photoshop some Andrew Walsh ‘The Metal Years’ memes for us please?”

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Ron Upshaw: “Come to Akron, Ohio, fire breathing dragons, Sacrafix!”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2176

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Aaron Mason: “#BlameBing”

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Aaron Mason: “Ba-boom!”

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Aaron Mason: “Don’t listen to me, I’m an idiot.”

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Aaron Mason: “I’d say you look nervous and unsettled; but, honestly, how can you tell anymore?”

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Aaron Mason: “Mess with their minds, man! They’ll never know! Was it live or was it Memorex!!?”

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Aaron Mason: “Name you kid whatever you want.”

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Aaron Mason: “Neinen”

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Aaron Mason: “No!”

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Aaron Mason: “Once again, we’ll be back with the world’s worst bragger.”

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Aaron Mason: “The drugs are in the water, man!”

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Aaron Mason: “They’re not liking it!”

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Aaron Mason: “What!?!”

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Aaron Mason: “You know what? The door’s that way. I’ll, I’ll take it from here.”

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Aaron Mason and Andrew: “#BlameBing. Blame Bing.”

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Aaron Mason and Andrew: “Total power move, all about intimidation. Wow.”

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Aaron Mason and Andrew: “We’ll be back with the world’s worst bragger. Jesus Christ.”

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Andrew: “A pastiche of homages”

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Andrew: “Ahh! Screw it!”

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Andrew: “Alright, I’ll eat the worm.”

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Andrew: “And the listeners are so sick of me talking about it.”

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Andrew: “Auntie Jessica’s Case Files”

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Andrew: “Awwww!”

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Andrew: “Bad men!”

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Andrew: “By the way, do I say ‘Jesus Christ’ a lot?”

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Andrew: “Day two of Luke Burbank’s vacation, leaving me in charge.”

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Andrew: “He’s also the reason why I’m a KIRO today. And, frankly, I’m a little intimidated by him.”

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Andrew: “I’m basically a fiscal liberal, social conservative.”

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Andrew: “I’m not gonna lie. I feel out of my element here a little bit.”

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Andrew: “It’s one of the most universally rec–I’ve already messed it up. Let me start over.”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “You are the worst!”

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Andrew: “Or, I’m getting Binged again.”

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Andrew: “She Writes, Murder!!!”

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Andrew: “Stay right where you are, nobody’s going anywhere. You’re gonna listen to this Tuesday installment of TBTL; and, you’re gonna like it.”

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Andrew: “That is not good broadcasting; and, that’s me talking!”

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Andrew: “That’s my catchphrase!”

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Andrew: “These teeth are clean!”

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Andrew: “They’re very back-slappy about it.”

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Andrew: “Uh, eff this!”

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Andrew: “Wow.”

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Andrew: “You can’t tell me to floss, you’re not my dad! And, I never asked to be born!”

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Andrew and Aaron Mason: Aaron insulted then apologized to Aidan

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Andrew and Aaron Mason: Aaron rattles off the Konami Code

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Andrew and Aaron Mason: Andrew is pressuring Aaron to drink the milk left outside the studio

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Andrew and Aaron Mason: Andrew wants Aaron to count his fillings on air

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Andrew and Aaron Mason: Andrew’s computer died and Aaron was to blame

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Andrew and Aaron Mason: “Mason gets to plug something. Aww, sweet!”

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Andrew and Aaron Mason: “No mountain too tall. And, good luck to all. (Nice)”

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Andrew and Aaron Mason: Portland, West Carolina, The Bay City

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Andrew and Aaron Mason: “Tell them Andrew sent ya! (Oh my God)”

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TBTL Episode Calculator and Andrew: “This is episode number 2176 in a collector’s series. Nice. Thanks, Calculator! No problem, Andrew. Good luck today. Awwww! Thanks.”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2175

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When Andrew was introducing Steve “Stu-bot” Neuman to the show, Andrew mentioned the domain, heggielover.biz, as one of the sites that Stu-bot was managing behind-the-scenes. Well, the domain, heggielover.biz, was available and I snatched it up. The domain is set to redirect visitors to Marsupial Gurgle.

Andrew: “You know him as the man behind infiniteguest.org, and the lesser known, but equally respected, heggielover.biz. He’s none other than Stu, the Stu-bot, Neuman.”

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Andrew: “Clearly, like, everything locked up on this side of things.”

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Andrew: “Don’t, just get in the helicopter! Like, why do you have to be having your legs hang over?”

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Andrew: “Hey, Stu-bot!”

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Andrew: “How come there are all these stories in the world about free hot dogs; yet, they are never happening to me?”

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Andrew: “I would rather have him do the whole show eating bags of his sausages; but, just stay clothed. And, don’t force me to, don’t force me to answer questions like that.”

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Andrew: “I’m not, I’m not much of a foodie.”

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Andrew: “It’s a scandal. We have an honest-to-God Song of the Summer scandal on our hands here folks; and, it ain’t pretty.”

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Andrew: “Like, I think I might be losing my marbles.”

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Andrew: “Look! It’s actually a PetSmart bag!”

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Andrew: “Luke Burbank is on day one of his vacation. Where is he? What is he doing? Honestly, I don’t know. You can ask him when he gets back.”

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Andrew: “Maybe, just cuz I’m a scaredy-cat and I’m becoming more and more of a scaredy-cat.”

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Andrew: “My sense of, umm, I don’t know, anal-retentiveness”

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Andrew: “Oh, man!”

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Andrew: “Rando sexy bots”

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Andrew: “Really!!? That’s a brush with fame!”

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Andrew: “Turns out, the cashier, not that interested in that fact.”

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Andrew: “Yes, this is exciting!”

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Andrew: “Yummy, yummy, yummy, I’ve got love in my tummy?”

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Andrew and Steve Neuman: Dazzling Date

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Andrew and Steve Neuman: “Oh, yeah. I gotta ask you a question: are you @HighSchoolBud? No, I’m not. Okay.”

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Steve Neuman: “1-1-2-1-1-2-1-2-1”

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Steve Neuman: Doot-dooing to 5 Seconds of Summer’s “Hey Everybody!”

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Steve Neuman: “My woif!”

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Steve Neuman: “Snoopy Dogg Dogg”

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Steve Neuman: “So, the last two songs that you’ve absolutely fallen in love with on TBTL have had homophobic slurs and racial slurs in them, Andrew.”

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Steve Neuman: “That was your first mistake, Andrew.”

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Steve Neuman: “That’s crazy! I mean, in a good way. That’s, that’s cool.”

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Steve Neuman and Andrew: “I understand. You–do you understand? No, but that’s okay. I mean, honestly, do you–not, not what I just said; which, was cruel and mean and not really that funny”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2174

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Andrew: “He and I… We should just start a sexy man puttering business!”

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Andrew: “I need a, we need a boss in here so bad. Jonathan!!!”

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Andrew: “Jonathan!!!”

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Andrew: Saying “One I pop, I can’t stop” and laughing

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Andrew: “The Savory Sixteen”

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Andrew: “You kidz, the vidz!”

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Andrew: “You call that a pushup?”

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Andrew and Luke: “Do I have any wiggle room, do I have any wiggle room here? No.”

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Andrew and Luke: “Hello, Luke. I just thought of something, like this moment. Alright.”

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Andrew and Luke: “I always want my last bite (Right) to be sausage.”

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Andrew and Luke: “It’s package grabbing time! It’s package hearing time! What would that sound like?”

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Andrew and Luke: Singing “I’m going hungry. I’n going hungry. Yeah!” and saying “God, we are so good!”

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Andrew and Luke: “What are you wearing, Luke? A sunburn and a smile. Oh, f… I need a, we need a boss in here so bad. Jonathan!!!”

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Luke: “Because, you know, our bodies are a, are a wonderland; to also quote Creed. Umm, uh, and… I just wanted to see if I could get the listeners riled up there.”

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Luke: Chuckling

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Luke: “Dude, this is the Outback Steakhouse of podcasting. The world’s just right.”

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Luke: “I don’t want to be, um, I don’t want to be… turding up the punch bowl.”

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Luke: “I saw it in a theater. I used to be a much better person.”

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Luke: “I wanted to see, some, some, some bait and tackle by the end of that night!”

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Luke: Lightly Chuckling

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Luke: Luke didn’t get to see the promised bait and tackle

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Luke: “My name is Luke Burbank, your host, coming to you today from the Mandarin Oriental. Am I allowed to say that? Is that the proper nomenclature? I don’t know, it’s on the building.”

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Luke: “Temple of the Derp”

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Luke: “The Czar of the Telestrator!”

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Luke: “The Zara of the Telestrator!”

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Luke: “Welcome to Vegas, everybody!”

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Luke and Andrew: “A sunburn and a smile (Oh, f…)”

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Luke and Andrew: Andrew is asked what Luke is currently wearing

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Luke and Andrew: “Dear Dad, have you heard this hot track”

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Luke and Andrew: “I call it Lost Wages, Andrew. Because, because of the gambling?!?”

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Luke and Andrew: “It’s either in the bathroom or in the aisle, man! Oh my God. Yeah, yeah. Good stuff.”

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Luke and Andrew: “It’s package grabbing time! (Ooh!)”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke has old man chest

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Luke and Andrew: Schindler’s Sausage

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Luke and Andrew: Singing “I don’t mind stealing bread from the mouth of decadence. I’m feeling hungry!”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2173

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Andrew: Drawn out “Luke”

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Andrew: “Hmm. Running long? Question mark?”

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Andrew: “I’m gonna miss the shit out of him.”

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “Right”

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Andrew: “Now I’m back, baby!”

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Andrew: “Oh my gosh! How old are you in that thing?”

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Andrew: “This is never gonna happen, this is never gonna happen. I let myself believe. Why did I let myself believe?”

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Andrew: “Wait, are you disrespecting my duplication investigation conversation?”

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Andrew: “Where’s my turd open?”

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Andrew: “Who, who shouted us out, what did they say, and did they sound angry.”

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Andrew: “You think that it’s tough to talk to you while you’re eating sausage; which, it is.”

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Andrew and Luke: HRCon and HurCon

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Luke: “And exactly what TBTL needs.”

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Luke: “And, it is like low-carb Christmas.”

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Luke: Asking Steve Nelson to approve two requests before it’s too late

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Luke: Chuckling

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Luke: Chuckling #2

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Luke: “Double Duking”

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Luke: “Get out of my face!”

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Luke: “Hey, we should collaborate! Please hire me”

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Luke: “Hey, we should collaborate! Please hire me… and my friend in LA.”

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Luke: “I just want to suck up to the right person”

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Luke: “In typically TBTL fashion, let me ask you some self-serving questions…”

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Luke: “Is that wool? No. Fart blanket.”

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Luke: “Let me snoozle you with a sneetail real quick, Tens of listeners.”

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Luke: “Man, I love those, those Dukes. I love those Double Dukes.”

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Luke: “Mission accomplished”

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Luke: “My woif”

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Luke: “People say a lot of stuff; and, usually, they don’t know what they’re talking about.”

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Luke: “(Perro) Pod-dog has had a major upgrade, you guys, I gotta tell you guys. Pod-dog has now become Pool-dog.”

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Luke: Singing “Shorty”

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Luke: “Those are the kinds of things that keep me up at night, sadly; because, I don’t want to be delivering you a hot, piping bowl of word salad, like I just did there.”

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Luke: “Vaya con Dios”

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Luke and Andrew: Deuzzle and Snoozle

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Luke and Andrew: Ghost in the ipDTL Machine

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Luke and Andrew: “I picked a bad day to stop sniffing turd sound effects. Okay, (Didn’t really) let’s, let’s move on.”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke imitating the choppy, ipDTL word salad

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Luke and Andrew: Noptimistic and Cautiously Noptimistic

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Luke and Andrew: “So, she’s only fourteen hearbeats away from being a Garrison Keillor. So, I think… that’s pretty good. Put that in your pipe and think about it.”

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Luke and Andrew: “That sounds like the inside of your head when you have aphasia. Right.”

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Luke and Andrew: “What’s the opposite of dazzling the listeners with the… I don’t know, but we’ve been doing it.”

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Luke and Steve Nelson: “Alright, enjoy baby daddy camp. Okay.”

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Luke, Steve Nelson and Andrew: “Like, are we pretty much screwed at this point, boss, with you gone? No, because the complaints still come here. So… So, we’re still on the radar? Yeah, (That’s good… that’s good) yeah. I, I think you guys are set.”

 

Steve Nelson: “Luke blew me off. I’m not gonna lie.”

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Steve Nelson and Andrew: Baby Daddy Camp

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