David Burbank – Page 5 – Marsupial Gurgle

Andrew and Luke: “I have a lot of stuff to… scold you about regarding… the font story; but, we’ll… we’ll get to that in, (What!?!) in a moment. You are a font of criticism… today, Andrew. That’s bad.”

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David Burbank: “I love me some Nacho Libre”

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Luke: “And, that man is Andrew Walsh”

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Luke: “Because we have… an additional microphone set up where he is… we’re also picking up… Rudy, the Pod-dog, just going to… town on her private parts! (I say, I say, what’s up dog!)”

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Luke: “I don’t think so! Because, the… what is the picture? It’s a permanent record of what your eyeball can see”

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Luke: “I rest my case”

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Luke: “I’ll tell you this. I’ll, I’ll answer your question with an unrelated anecdote”

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Luke: “It’s a very, very difficult journey… to mount this podcast five days a week”

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Luke: “It’s the shag rug of fonts”

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Luke: Making mouth trumpet sounds

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Luke: Saying “Or, the business of sports” as Casey Kasem

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Luke: Singing “…no serifs to hold me back”

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Luke: “Well, you can’t win ’em all!”

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Luke: “Why are you guys all so sad?”

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Luke: “You’re welcome, Stu”

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Luke and Andrew: “I can’t believe I benched Theo this week in, in favor of Kenny Britt. Huge mistake. Huge… mistake. Power out.”

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Luke and David Burbank: “It’s… it’s… it’s very… (Too loud and too specific) It’s too… it’s, it’s… it’s the discolored butthole flap of fonts”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2284: The Burbank Family Edition

December 31, 2016 December 31, 2016

Things are gonna start happening to us now

Listener Nick Armes left a voicemail in response to Luke’s attempt at doing an impression of Chewbacca on the previous show. Nick showed off his impressive Chewbacca impression.

Listener Nick: Doing a Chewbacca impression

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Carey Burbank and Luke: Carey doesn’t like being on TBTL because something she says comes out wrong or Luke cuts her off, and then Luke cuts her off

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Carey Burbank, Andrew and Luke: “Whenever I put myself on the show, I want to curl up in a ball and die, because I sound like such an idiot. (Oh my God!) … my love, you do not sound like an idiot.”

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David Burbank: “Punch it Chewie!”

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David Burbank and Luke: “Punch it Chewie! Damn, she really punched it, it actually got, kind of scaring me”

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Luke: “Are you kidding me!?”

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Luke: “Blame Associate Producer Linh Pham. Also, possible show title, by the way.”

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Luke: “By the way, I want to say thanks to our Super Pham, Linh Pham, who excerpted this and sent it along”

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Luke: Chuckling

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Luke: Doing a Chewbacca impression

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Luke: Doing a Chewbacca impression #2

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Luke: “Don’t taser me, bro”

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Luke: “Hello. I’m Luke, the solo host of the program”

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Luke: “Hey there, everybody! Welcome to a Friday morning edition of TBTL, the show that just might be Too Beautiful To Live. Coming to you today from the backseat of a loaner car from the local Audi dealership.”

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Luke: “How… dare you”

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Luke: “I absolutely did not think this through”

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Luke: “I shushed her with my eyes, mostly, in the rearview mirror”

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Luke: “I think Andrew said, ‘Shut your face,’ or something”

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Luke: “I’m-a really, really failing on the, the grammar today, Walsh”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: Laughing #2

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Luke: “Let me just ask them, quickly, if this is, if this is weird for them as it is for me now”

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Luke: “O-dark thirty”

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Luke: “Oh, my God, yeah! Please do!”

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Luke: Saying “Everybody go to the Peach Bowl!” as Rodney Dangerfield

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Luke: Saying “Everybody, dance!” as Rodney Dangerfield

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Luke: “She said yes, Andrew.”

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Luke: Singing “Just about coffee drinking time. Just about coffee drinking time!”

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Luke: “That’s what APM is paying us in now, the petty jealousy of people who are more famous than us”

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Luke: “The fact that you wanted to break back in to say that, is the most TBTL thing of all time”

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Luke: “There’s definitely… a point where Rodney Dangerfield is gonna go, ‘Everybody, dance!’ And then…”

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Luke: “Things are gonna start happening to us now”

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Luke and Andrew: “Long story short, Andrew, he can’t believe this is what I do for my job. Yeah, no, nobody can.”

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Luke and Andrew: “See, let me explain the technical side of this. Oh, good! Because we’re in the car… Yeah. I just said, I want to make it boring for the listeners, and I followed up with a statement, ‘Let me explain the technical side of this'”

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Luke and Andrew: “This is basically like a private shame for you and I. Right.”

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Luke and Andrew: “You’re gonna have to be strong for both of us, cuz I’m kind of, I’m already weirded out by where I’m recording the show. I’m podcasting for two today, Luke. That’s right. That’s not my way of announcing anything, though.”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2284: Andrew Walsh Edition

December 31, 2016 December 31, 2016

Andrew: “After our big Hayes bump”

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Andrew: “Alexa, stand by”

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Andrew: “Are you just gonna shush him with your eyes, as you… in your famous Burbank move”

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Andrew: “Being shushed… is, that’s a tough pill to swallow”

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Andrew: “He just wasn’t, he just wasn’t quick enough on the draw of appreciating Luke”

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Andrew: “Hello, all you new listeners. I’m sorry that this is what the show sounds like.”

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Andrew: “I can’t believe that you’ve put yourself in a situation that you’re in”

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Andrew: “I have, I, I have ten fingers, I wouldn’t want to cut any of them off”

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Andrew: “Is it ‘One English Summer’ by Donovan?”

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Andrew: “Is that not the most TB–T–that’s like the most TBTL sports shit talk you could possibly ask for, and I love it.”

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Andrew: “It’s another Rodney Dangerfield-esque situation!”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing #2

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Andrew: Laughing #3

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Andrew: Laughing #4

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “Right”

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Andrew: Laughing while Luke is talking

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Andrew: “Mad is a strong word”

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Andrew: “Maybe it’s like Schrödin–Schrödinger’s Hayes, or something like that”

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Andrew: “Oh, God!”

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Andrew: “Okay, that’s a, a hell of a build-up”

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Andrew: Saying “The Underdog by Spoon” with an exaggerated “Dog”

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Andrew: “Stand by!”

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Andrew: “That’s the, the ‘Ga Ga Ga Ga’ album, or whatever”

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Andrew: “You son of a!”

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Andrew: “You’re listening to Fresh Ears, I’m Dave Davies?”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew speculating what would spill out of Luke’s head if it were bonked by a coconut

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Andrew and Luke: “Oh, man! Are you in hyperspeed, or hyperdrive, or… (Yeah) Oh, if I keep saying things, I’m gonna make Nick madder. Never mind.”

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Andrew and Luke: “That sickens me. Easy, Shatner.”

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Andrew and Luke: “Uh, because you just were thinking about some of my jokes and you wanted to laugh again? No, you’re wrong, Andrew. Let me correct you on that. You son of a!”

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Andrew, Luke, Carey Burbank, David Burbank and Sam Burbank: “No mountain too tall, and good luck to all”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2280

December 26, 2016 December 26, 2016

David Burbank and Luke: David jokingly asks why Kdude talks about Super Bowl 24

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Luke: “And this episode, two-thousand two-hundred and eighty, in a collector’s series, is erected in your honor. Sorry for using the term ‘erected’.”

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Luke: “And we’ve now swapped out family members of mine. We’re down a Susie Burbank, but we have added a David Burbank to the mix.”

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Luke: “Because, my name is Luke; and, not one day of my life goes by that the Star Wars thing doesn’t get raised for me.”

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Luke: “Featuring my little brother, David Burbank… aka, The Last Burbank”

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Luke: “Here I am, back at work. Walsh, on the other hand, he is in the ATL right now”

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Luke: “I don’t have a co-host today; but, what I did have, up until just a few moments ago, was a lot of family here at Burbank Springs. So, we made family-ade today.”

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Luke: “I have somehow… found myself… having a job that I am actually excited to get back to!”

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Luke: “I kneel by the side of my bed, I say a little prayer. And, I put a few things in a hope chest, and I lay me down to sleep.”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Lotta high fives. Lotta smiles.”

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Luke: “My woife!”

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Luke: “Y’all”