Tag: Luke Burbank

Andrew: “Do your job or get another job!!”

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Andrew: “I don’t know the language. I’m unfamiliar with this process”

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Andrew: “I’ll turn this back on myself a little bit though too”

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Andrew: “It’s… intimidating!”

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Andrew: Singing “When you drop kick your jacket”

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Luke: “Calm down, Burbs”

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Luke: “Parent groups just don’t understand”

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Luke: “Well, if you’re gonna rob something in Portland, this is the week to do it”

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Luke: “What I’m realizing is that I am annoying”

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Luke: “What the hell!?”

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Luke and Andrew: “It’s a sagging indicator. (It’s a sagging indicator) That’s also a decent show title (That is. I’ll write it down)”

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Luke and Andrew: “This bar has been robbed, at gun point, twice in the last week. Whoa! Sorry. That, that was a laugh… turned cough… turned Greg Cody. Sorry about that”

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Andrew: “I almost can’t contain myself”

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Andrew: “I feel like this is the problem with these smart machines”

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Andrew: “Luke fails”

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Andrew: “Oh… hi, Mark!”

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Andrew: “That is… so fucking bleak, man”

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Andrew: “This is all bunk and it’s not gonna happen”

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Andrew: “We are definitely living in another… another time of these, these huge barons that’s just so strange… I dunno if I used ‘barons’ there right”

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Andrew: “You don’t know me… dryer. You don’t know how dry I like my clothes”

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Luke: “And, Andrew… when I tell you that I let out a yelp! Talk about a Yelp! review of a lifetime”

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Luke: “I am, I am super into windows”

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Luke: “I can’t do that, Luke… No, I just need you to dry this stuff a little bit more. I’m sorry… It’s dry. Well, it’s really not. I’m holding–I’m the one who has to wear it. I’m sorry… My sensors tell me it’s dry, Luke”

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Luke: “Let me get my beak wet”

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Luke: Making the sound of electricity zapping through his body

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Luke: “My booty be itchin'”

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Luke: “Oh, you were the guy with the secret baby, right?”

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Luke: Singing “Wiggle it… just a little bit. Lemme see you wiggle it”

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Luke: “Thank… God you’re nerds!”

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Luke: “The Metaverse is really The Matrix, right?”

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Luke: “You know… I like a good stare… It’s a big deal to me”

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Luke: “You son of a B”

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Luke and Andrew: Improvised advert for Dani Gaudreau

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Andrew: “I’m deleting the app!”

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Andrew: “Oh, I missed that! Oh, what a bad Clevelander am I”

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Andrew: “Put me in the shitter; cuz, it’s what I deserve!”

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Andrew: “Some people finger-wagged me on Twitter!”

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Andrew: “There’s no dente to al”

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Andrew: “Woohoo!”

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Andrew: “You know… when we were younger and broker and… more East Coaster”

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Andrew and Luke: “I ask them to put me in the toilet. I’m, like, just put me in the shitter. (You really do) That’s what I deserve… is what I say. Well, okay”

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Andrew and Luke: “I don’t wanna turn this whole show into complaining about cable companies and it’s already turning that way (I do)”

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Luke: “40s… 50s… 60s… 70s… 80s… 90s… and today”

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Luke: “Bunk-ass lasagna”

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Luke: “Comfort level: Low… Comfort level: Extremely low”

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Luke: “Coming to you from the beautiful South Waterfront… of Portland, Oregon… Which is not where I moved this weekend… It’s my girlfriend’s house… Because, it turns out… the Internet does not work… at my new apartment”

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Luke: “Ple-thor-a”

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Luke: Saying “Weird!” in a funny manner

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Luke: Singing melody to a song

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Luke: “You know what? You’ve actually, you’ve checked my privilege and I, and I thank you for this”

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Luke: “Your lack of trust in me is warranted”

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Andrew: “‘Warming up in the arm barn’ is a terrible phrase”

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Andrew: “Before you even ask, let me admit… today’s going to be a No Brains Day on my side of my microphone as well, Luke. I’m sorry”

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Andrew: “But, I love it so much”

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Andrew: “Congratulations, Zuckerberg. You just invented Second Life again”

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Andrew: “I call it ‘Rosemary’s Babying'”

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Andrew: “I don’t even know why I said that. I, I honestly don’t”

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Andrew: “I don’t need to be in a room with hot spinach dip for 2 hours, for God’s sake”

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Andrew: “I hate that phrase so much!”

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Andrew: “I’m gonna drive you up there, Genevieve”

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Andrew: “I’m willing for you to convince me of this”

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Andrew: “Love you a transition; I’m hearing the wheels”

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Andrew: “No Brains Day”

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Andrew: “Oh, shoot! Andrew, why would you do this on a No Brains Day?”

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Andrew: “Okay. We gotta tear this thing down… down to the pegs… Studs?”

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Andrew: “Rosemary’s Baby is about people who move into a new apartment and have to their first dinner on the floor. Like, that’s all you need to know”

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Andrew: “Sorry. This is awkward. I’m pulling out my phone”

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Andrew: “Stop playing this shell game!”

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Andrew: “That’s Luke approved, right?”

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Andrew: “The Omen is about a kid who stands on a roof”

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Andrew: “The Poltergeist is a movie about a, a TV that has a lotta static”

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Andrew: “Warming up in the arm barn”

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Andrew: “What a great coinky-dink”

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Andrew: “Whoa! You had a propeller one!? Whoa! Rich kid”

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Andrew: “Why won’t they let me on the Le Batard Show? Do you have to know anything about sports?”

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Andrew: “Yeah, I’m interested in hearing about that on, on Monday”

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Andrew: “You’re flashing the cash on the boxes”

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Luke: “21st floor”

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Luke: “Andrew’s Turbo Film Reviews”

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Luke: “By the way, welcome to Apartment Talk… I’m your host, Jeff Goldblum… Change your apartment, change your world”

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Luke: “Don’t do that! Be nice to my friend Andrew”

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Luke: “Going down”

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Luke: “How can I guess that, Andrew? How can I guess that? And, you don’t believe in a God”

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Luke: “I am, like, honestly, in just the throes… the throes of second guessing myself”

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Luke: “I’ve already slightly pwned myself”

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Luke: “Parking level 1”

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Luke: Saying “Uh, yes-yes-yes-yes, yes” as Jeff Goldblum

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Luke: “Well, if it isn’t the consequences of my decisions”

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Luke: “Your friend’s new name is: Roden, Roden”

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Luke and Andrew: “Can I center myself in this story? (Mmm-hmm)”

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Luke and Andrew: “Come on down to the Arm Barn! (Yeah)”

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Luke and Andrew: “It just sounds fun and… (Mmm-mmm) and flirty”

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Andrew: “All of a sudden, it is like mustard gas in the whole room again!!”

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Andrew: “And, I think if somebody farts in the movie, you smell it in the theater”

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Andrew: “And, like, I’m just talking to you, having a grand ol’ time, and, just now, moments ago… the room just filled with a stench!”

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Andrew: “Anywhoozle”

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Andrew: “But, he is gassing up the place!”

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Andrew: “Chalamoo? [ph]“

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Andrew: “Goddamnit, Theo!”

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Andrew: “Good evening. Today, our top story is: my cat has gas”

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Andrew: “He’s just sleeping and farting!”

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Andrew: “I kinda don’t wanna blow it all here”

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Andrew: “I think Madonna was in one of my dreams last night”

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Andrew: “I walk into my, into my studio and… it reeks!”

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Andrew: “I was with you… the other day… pizza face”

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Andrew: “I’m gonna do something… really stupid here”

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Andrew: “I’m sorry I’m destroying this show, earnestly”

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Andrew: “Luke, know your place”

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Andrew: “Not cool, man!”

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Andrew: “Old farty Theo is now awake. So, now, that’s gonna lead to screaming, probably, that the mic will pick up. Sorry about this”

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Andrew: “Shit. That sounds good, though”

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Andrew: Singing “Dune-tune! [ph]“

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Andrew: Singing “Just gonna play me a Squid Game”

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Andrew: Singing along with the Blursday song’s funky bass

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Andrew: “Today is the day that I start staring down that newsletter deadline”

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Andrew: “Well, I’m about ready to do something karmically bad here”

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Andrew and Luke: “Get that nose ring, it’s a bones day! That’s right!”

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Luke: “But, also, terrified that people were gonna think… I had… the ‘rona”

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Luke: Singing “Somewhere in my wicked childhood, I must’ve done something good… Cuz, here you are, standing there, loving me; whether or not you… should”

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Luke: Singing “Yeah, we fancy like Applebee’s on a date night”

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Luke: “That tail really wags this dog, dudn’t it?”

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Luke: “Timothée Chablagoo [ph] has been dead the entire film”

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Luke: “Your actor’s new name is: Chablagoo, Chablagoo [ph]“

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Luke and Andrew: “I’m giving you 2 Pinocchios for that. Oh, no!”

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Luke and Andrew: “That’s my second spicy take for the day. I’m gonna try to out-spicy Theo today, if I can. (Yeah, please… Cover it up)”

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Luke and Andrew: “When you start whispering about… tummy troubles… that’s a Top Story to me. Okay”

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