Author: Linh Pham

Andrew: “And I’m God damn obsessed with it.”

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Andrew: Doing his deep and weird voice again

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Andrew: Generation X

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Andrew: “God!”

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Andrew: “I don’t know why nobody is signing up for my fashion podcast; in which, I describe average fashion designs!”

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Andrew: “I should’ve done a Burbank.”

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Andrew: “It was so cheesy!”

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Andrew: “Kardashian! Kardashian! Kardashian!”

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Andrew: “OrWaCaMa!”

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: “There’s something going on here.”

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Andrew: “This show is bottomless.”

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Andrew: “We are the hot dog story podcast of record.”

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Andrew: “What do you think of that shit?”

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Andrew: “Who? Who-Who?”

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Andrew: “You don’t!?!?”

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Andrew: “Your producer’s head just exploded, by the way. I heard it.”

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Andrew and Luke: “I never had to ask you, ‘Who let the dog out?’ You!”

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Luke: Attempting to do a David Schwimmer impression

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Luke: “I don’t even think that joke makes any sense.”

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Luke: “I’ve had it with these motherfucking vapes on this motherfucking plane.”

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Luke: “If you ever feel like you’re taking things into a non-interesting direction, you can, you can fall back on the knowledge that I will take it in an even less interesting direction. I will always make what you were talking about sound way more interesting.”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Oh, God! God have mercy”

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Luke: “Oh, God! May God have mercy on the kid who got Pro Wings and wore them to school.”

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Luke: “Polishing our own squirrel horn”

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Luke: “Professional broadcasting ladies and gentlemen at its finest.”

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Luke: Saying “Der Wienerschnitzel” in a funny German accent

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Luke: Saying “What’s… going on with this vaping thing?” a la Kai Ryssdal

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Luke: Singing “A. A-E-I-O-U, E.”

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Luke: “Wham, bam, thank you ma’am.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Can we… Oh, God! They don’t have a SKU? Can we turn the Tens of listeners loose on this; because, Linh Pham will have a pair at your house this afternoon. Before I even post this. I don’t know how he knows.”

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Luke and Andrew: “That’s Smurfing the Smurfest! (I know!) That’s Smurfing the Smurfiest, my friend.”

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Andrew: “Can I, can I have another napkin? I make a mess.”

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Andrew: “Cuz it gets my blood up, and I’m like, ‘We must win, and you must lose!'”

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Andrew: “Cuz there’ll be plenty of times you will also be down in Seattle; and, you’re not gonna have to go try to, try to do the show from some busted ass boat that you may not own anymore.”

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Andrew: “Hi, Luke!”

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Andrew: “I can’t believe he’s leaving us hanging like this!”

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Andrew: “I hate your faces! I hate your faces so much!”

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Andrew: “I think the TBTL implications are just astounding… No, and that’s a pretty big word, I guess. I don’t know if I’m exaggerating.”

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Andrew: “I’m not buying your boat. Talked to Vieves about it.”

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Andrew: “Let’s just say that I do have a Christopher Walken [walk-in] closet.”

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Andrew: “Luke, do not interrupt… No.”

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Andrew: “Luke!”

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Andrew: “My heart is still in Seattle. I care about Seattle!”

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Andrew: “Oh, come the hell on, Peter!”

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Andrew: “Oh, God!”

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Andrew: “Or, maybe Carey kills me.”

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Andrew: “Sorry, Ders! Sorry, Ders.”

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Andrew: “This isn’t food!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Liberal, soft on crime, Burbank is what I call you. (Yup!)”

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Andrew and Luke: “Oh, man! (Rudy…) I upset Rudy. I’m sorry. I was being hyperbolic, Rudes!”

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Luke: “And while we will still do the show, you know, in this remote capacity, mostly because of your farting.”

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Luke: “And, I almost cried with fucking joy.”

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Luke: “Everything’s coming up Burbank.”

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Luke: “I need to start printing up some bumper stickers that just say ‘Luke!’; cuz, I just pulled a hardcore Jeb there.”

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Luke: “Not to be a cornball”

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Luke: Singing “We’re gonna look for apartments, but until then we’ll be in this” in the manner of Macklemore’s “Thrift Shop”

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Luke: “The LA contingent can just kill Andrew’s ass.”

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Luke: “Yeah, you just do the right thing!”

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Luke: “You enjoy a good Frumpening!”

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Luke and Andrew: Andrew laughing and saying “Hi, Luke!” to Luke playing the “Carl’s World” drop

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Luke and Andrew: “By the way, the dog just farted. so I hope you’re happy. (Oof, God!)”

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Luke and Andrew: “God! I Jebbed myself hard! Oh, God!”

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Luke and Andrew: “This is my Frumpening, and it’s freaking me out!”

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Andrew: “Don’t you hate it when they don’t name the new Bourne movie… Bourne Again!”

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Andrew: “Yawn!!!”

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Andrew and Luke: “One does not simply jump into Super Bowl conversation on a Monday. Please, please just make that as the photo!”

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Luke: “One TBTL to rule them all.”

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Luke: “You know, what happens online stays online.”

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Luke and Andrew: “I thought of that joke yesterday. I can’t even edit it out. I hate you so much!”

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Luke and Andrew: “One does not simply just get to the point. Yes!”

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Andrew: “Holy crap, this anecdote is going on too long!”

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Andrew: “Huh?”

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Andrew: “I’m outta here!”

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Andrew: “I’m the motherfucker who turned it personal!”

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Andrew: “Oh, dang it!”

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Andrew: “On the page I wrote, ‘Oh, shit! I’m an idiot.'”

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Andrew: “That’s my hot take!”

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Andrew: “This is a Friday show.”

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Andrew: “We did something wrong and I don’t know what it is!”

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Andrew: “We’re just about done with this damn thing. No, just joking!”

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Luke: “And now I’m getting realer than real.”

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Luke: “He’s been down there b-b-b-blocking out the haters!”

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Luke: “I’m whizzing him a smoker here. We did not discuss this before the show.”

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Luke: Making Klaxon Sounds

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Luke: “The touch, the feel, the fabric of our show! Thank you.”

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Luke: “We need to surface! (Making Klaxon Sounds) We’re surfacing!”

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Luke: “What!?! Just pay me in clothes!”

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Luke and Andrew: “And that wasn’t a public break-up; but, you know, listeners… I made it one!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Did I tell you a crazy story about my parallel life Adam? Huh? I’m sorry. Re-arrange those words in a sentence, cuz it doesn’t make sense to me. Story tell you did I, Adam life parallel? Oh, yes!”

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Luke and Andrew: “He went from being a little Ten to a little tense. Ohhhhhhhhhhh!”

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Luke and Andrew: TBTL is like a comfortable pair of shoes

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Luke and Andrew: “Uh, nothing buying another boat won’t fix. Which is a perfect time to thank our sponsors of the day. Oh, shit. I quit.”

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