Author: Linh Pham

Andrew: Awesome Laugh

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Andrew: “CSI: Pizza Hut”

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Andrew: Explaining that seeing everybody smoking where there’s a ceiling above them was weird

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Andrew: “Hello and welcome to Tertiary Story”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Oh, God. Oh, God. No, don’t search for that!”

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: “So, I just shut the door. I just shut that closet door, don’t open that”

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Andrew: Stifled Laughing

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Andrew: “What do you mean? Yeah, of course!”

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Andrew and Luke: “And does give you almost the heebie-jeebies, I mean… It goes me the he-dogs”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew has a reputation of being a he-dog biter and a she-dog winker

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew may have gone off script again

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew reciting a Cream of Wheat ad with Luke laying down the beat

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew role-playing as someone with a soggy soup pizza

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew shouldn’t try to broke is brain even further

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Andrew and Luke: Attempting to do the Hotwire.com jingle

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Andrew and Luke: “I wouldn’t go up with you by the way. Yeah, I wouldn’t blame ya. I wouldn’t go up with me.”

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Andrew and Luke: The guys are way in deep

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Andrew and Luke: Toronto is “just north of our understanding”

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Luke: “Alright, that was a little trip into Scat-town that none of us could have anticipated”

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Luke: “And he cut the line from the ground and shot up like a motherfucking rocket”

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Luke: “As the license plate frame once said: 51% sweetheart, 49% bitch. Don’t push it.”

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Luke: “How much would you be shitting your lawn chair, Walsh?”

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Luke: “It’s like a whatever, it’s like a whatever”

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Luke: Reciting a portion of Shel Silverstein’s “The Dirtiest Man in the World”

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Luke: Singing a quick musical button

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Luke: “Tomorrow, we’ll have even more details from my life that nobody asked about”

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Luke: “Welcome to boring cell phone talk with Luke, by the way”

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Luke: “What!?!?”

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Luke and Andrew: “I would search for ‘shit sandwich’. Oh, god. Oh, god. No, don’t search for that. Don’t anybody, don’t anybody search for that.”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke went to a bar named Rudy’s in Kendallville, IN to make sure his dog didn’t open up a bar

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Luke and Andrew: “Other side of that coin, and a much sadder move, would be ‘Will you marry me, Susie’ And then, odd that I chose my mom’s name. Let’s just put a pin in that for my therapist (Calling Dr. Freud)”

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Luke and Andrew: Reaction to Andrew’s scatting and reciting of the Cream of Wheat ad

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Luke and Andrew: Table service or not table service at Pizza Hut

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Andrew: “I’m not just even going to try to talk about geography again, I am mortified right now.”

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Andrew: “It happens, trust me. I’ve seen a lot of friends leave after I try to explain to them where Toronto is.”

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Andrew: Laughing “Oh my God”

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Andrew: “Please, if you have a well-behaved dog, bring that little dude; because, I’m-a pet the hell out of it.”

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Andrew: Sighing “Not really”

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Andrew: “Stu was kind of like, oh that was a bad joke ’cause I had to explain it. It’s like, no, no, you’re talking to an idiot”

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Andrew: “Umm, wait, hold on. God, why are you putting me on the spot here?”

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Andrew and Luke: Alternate pronunciations of “Fangboner”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew attempting to find another word than “exacerbate”

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Andrew and Luke: “I am not going to post the show today, is that okay? I think that is the exact right call, my friend.”

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Andrew and Luke: Luke might get emails, chainsaws or chain mails from listeners

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Luke: “Go fuck yourself”

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Luke: “I wrote that joke when I was staring at Toronto”

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Luke: “Okay, it’s Indiana o’clock somewhere, they say”

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Luke: Singing a bit of Nick Jonas’s “Jealous”

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Luke and Andrew: “And back to our theoretical band, which would be called what Andrew? Umm, probably the Theoretical Band.”

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Luke and Andrew: “…and there was an overpass, a road, and the road was called ‘Fangboner Road’. How are we, how are we 39 minutes into the podcast and you’re just talking Fangboner Road now?”

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Luke and Andrew: Big Huge Lakes and Big Huge Special Lakes

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Luke and Andrew: “Have you been to Niagara Falls? Yeah, my best friend lives there, you’ll never meet him”

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Luke and Andrew: Huge ups and mega snaps

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On TBTL #1897, Luke was describing what he saw when he looked across Niagara Falls on the New York side and he was wondering whether he was seeing Toronto or not. Andrew did not help matters by not quite knowing where Toronto was in relation to Cleveland, Ohio. As Luke mentioned afterwards, he called he discussion a “geography lesson by two morons”.

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Andrew: “Adam and Eve and Brandi. Just need to write that down as a possible show title”

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Andrew: Explanation of how Andrew feels inside now that Luke is back hosting the show

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Andrew: “Hi Luke!”

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Andrew: “I stumble reading one e-mail and I’ll never live it down”

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Andrew: “I want to see that pretty face”

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Andrew: “Let’s not go to Crunktown”

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Andrew: “Luke Burbank, stop naming men”

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Andrew: “No, no… I put it on the list, then I took it off the list, then I put on the list, took it off the list”

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: Stretched out “Ohh”

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Andrew: “You could… you know, get in a fight!”

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Andrew: “You know, I saw this story all over the place, I don’t want to be Captain ‘No Fun Pants’ again”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew loves things that are covered by multiple pieces of protective plastic

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Andrew and Luke: The President of Rap Music weighs in on peas in guacamole

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Luke: “Burbank, unsupervised”

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Luke: “Get a rope”

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Luke: “He’s down in Koreatown, his name is Los Angeles. His name is Andrew Walsh, he’s in Los Angeles”

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Luke: “I think of him really as the natural unnatural white pistachio nut of podcasting”

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Luke: “I’m always listening to it and I’m loving the music and also the message like is kicking my heart in the nut sack”

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Luke: Short “Yep”

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Luke and Andrew: Andrew kills his microphone mid-sentence

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Luke and Andrew: Andrew quietly utters “Get a rope” after Luke says “City of New York”

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Luke and Andrew: “…are you happy to move out of the Bud Light, michelada, lime-a-rita hot seat of hosting into the Coors Light, comfortable, Papasan chair of co-hosting?”

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Luke and Andrew: “If you’re in New York City, that’s of course New York City… (New York City?)”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke should have used the correct Southern California city to describe Andrew’s name

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Luke and Andrew: “New York City? Get a rope.”

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Luke and Andrew: Peeling off a protective plastic cover on a microwave door may have been Luke’s first near orgasmic moment

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Luke and Andrew: Saying “That’s what they always say” in near unison

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