Category: Audio Clips

Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2224

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Andrew: “A secret is lurking somewhere”

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Andrew: “Are you literally gonna be sick? And, if so, can you please not do it on Genevieve’s computer?”

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Andrew: Deflated “I don’t belong in that club”

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Andrew: “Do you have any idea how much we use the letter ‘U’ in an e-mail?”

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Andrew: “Don’t start with a dumb, long ass story”

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Andrew: “He’s a rapper, a rappity-rapper”

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Andrew: “Here’s what I’m gonna say: I miss you. I’m being serious. Let me explain.”

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Andrew: “Holy cow!”

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Andrew: “How bad was that!?”

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Andrew: “I miss you.”

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Andrew: “I shit you not”

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Andrew: “I’m being serious.”

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Andrew: “I’m gonna say something that’s going to sound weird; but, I’m being a hundred percent honest here.”

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Andrew: “I’m not good with numbers”

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Andrew: “I’m regretting doing this already”

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Andrew: “I’m starting this show with so much regret!”

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Andrew: “In Soviet Russia… I’m sorry, we have to do it… Pal pens you!”

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Andrew: “It’s a death shaft”

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Andrew: “Listeners of this show know that I don’t exactly have an economy of words. I understand that. Sometimes it’s better if I just get to the point.”

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Andrew: “Nope.”

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Andrew: “Oh, you’re gonna lose it”

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Andrew: Saying “Luke” without the “U”

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Andrew: Saying “Push-up” with the “U”s

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Andrew: “So, that’s why I miss ‘U’. Was it worth? Was the build up worth it? Probably not. But that, you know what, it’s uphill from there.”

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Andrew: “Who the fuck am I?”

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Andrew: “Who would think that, like twenty years later, life would imitate art!”

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Andrew: “Y-O-O”

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Andrew: “You’re not alone, brother”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “Alright, guys. Talk to you next week; and, remember: No mountain too tall, and good luck to all. And, no mountain too small.”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “Alright, Phyllis, are you ready for this? Yes. Here we go… It’s time to thank our What a Piece of Work is Man level donors (Oh, yeah)”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: Andrew reading e-mails he sent to Phyllis with missing “U”s

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “Calendars are hard (Yeah)”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “From Aberdeen to Wenatchee (Alright!)”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “From Anacortes to Walla Walla (Alright!)”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “Heya! Hey-oh! Even a stopped clock!”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “I don’t think I even know what tang is; because, (Yeah) I will not touch this shit (Yeah) straight!”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “I have coffee here if yo need it! Yo!”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “In (Yeah) a hippity-hoppity way”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “Really! Yep. Well, let’s hear about that!”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: The Egg Agenda

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: Trying to say “computer” without the “U”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “You like eggs. Right. You love eggs. Yeah. You had a car. You named it Egg. Yeah! You loved Egg. Awww!”

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Phyllis Fletcher: “CTRL+V Chamber”

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Phyllis Fletcher: “I do my job!”

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Phyllis Fletcher: “I’m the listener advocate”

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Phyllis Fletcher: “It’s dot com”

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Phyllis Fletcher: “La-di-da!”

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Phyllis Fletcher: Laughing and clapping

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Phyllis Fletcher: “No, it was awesome!”

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Phyllis Fletcher: “No!”

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Phyllis Fletcher: “Oh, no!”

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Phyllis Fletcher: Singing “The incredible, edible Washington egg”

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Phyllis Fletcher: “Yeah!”

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Phyllis Fletcher and Andrew: “I love your story. It’s a beautiful story. I was awful!”

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Phyllis Fletcher and Andrew: “No, way! I know, (Jesus Christ!) isn’t that weird?”

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Phyllis Fletcher and Andrew: Not Lovers of Mayo

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Phyllis Fletcher and Andrew: Phyllis reacting to mayo talk and Andrew saying “Oh, God! You’re really gonna barf! This will be, I think this will be a first!”

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Phyllis Fletcher and Andrew: “The incredible, edible egg (That’s right!)”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2223

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Andrew: “Alright, Tom. We did it. We did it.”

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Andrew: “Are you… crazy?”

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Andrew: “Audio postcard”

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Andrew: “Aw, shit!”

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Andrew: “But I’ll be goddamned if I go back and listen to the tape”

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Andrew: “But, you can play with it any time you want!!!”

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Andrew: Deflated “I could do that”

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Andrew: Deflated “Yeah”

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Andrew: Explaining Luke’s complicated status

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Andrew: “He’s just like Luke!”

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Andrew: “Here we go with a unique Thursday edition of TBTL”

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Andrew: “I’ll just tell you the story from my perspective; cuz, why not?”

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Andrew: “It’s gonna be you and me, buddy!”

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Andrew: “It’s, uh, episode #2023 in a coll-no, 2223”

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Andrew: “Luke aced you out of the show!”

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Andrew: Making sound of static

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Andrew: “Nailed it!”

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Andrew: Recreating a Harley-Davidson motorcycle engine sound

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Andrew: Recreating an even firing motorcycle engine sound

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Andrew: “Rewrite this thing, then do a rewrite, then do a flip-a-dee-dip, and then add some sound. I’m just like, ‘What the fuck are you talking about?'”

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: “Yeah!”

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Andrew: “You asshole! Don’t ruin this moment!!!”

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Andrew: “You have a conspirathy, conspiracy theory, as a matter of fact”

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Andrew and Tom Tangney: Andrew is Luke’s booker

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Andrew and Tom Tangney: “Any song. Okay, any song. You just made the mistake of your life.”

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Andrew and Tom Tangney: “I am the polar opposite of Luke, (Wow!) in so many ways!”

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Andrew and Tom Tangney: “I’m going somewhere with this… Hey, this is TBTL. You don’t have to!”

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Andrew and Tom Tangney: Laughing

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Luke: “Everyone who is getting back on the plane… is taking… the sweetest motherfucking time, ever.”

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Luke: “I swear to God”

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Luke: “I’m gonna be able to get on my special first class ticket in a glass elevator, to blast out of the chocolate factory that I owned called, Life!”

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Luke: “Is it time to buy a hair piece?”

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Luke: “It’s like, I… jumped off a mushroom and spun in a bunch of circles, and karate kicked a hedgehog that flew into a Pokémon… cart? Those are things… I have heard associated with video games.”

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Luke: “Miracles maybe do happen”

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Luke: “Open, open, open.”

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Luke: Piloting it Up

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Luke: “So, for me, I am making today’s coffee, but it’s actually gonna be tomorrow’s coffee, is when everyone will hear it. For you hearing this right now, it’s today’s coffee made yesterday.”

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Luke: “Take off, take off, take off.”

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Luke: Trying to come up with a Deuce-y name for episode #2223 off the top of his head

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Luke: “When I found this out a few days ago, that I had been upgraded, I did a little dance with my heart and my body. Excuse me, my ba-ahdy.”

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Luke: “Would you be surprised to hear… that we do not, at any time, come within… seven football fields of where the Cessna went off the runway!!!”

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Luke: “Yeah, them’s the breaks”

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Luke, Andrew and Tom Tagney: “Hey, we’d like to thank our ‘What a Piece of Work is Man’ level donors of the day”

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Tom Tangney: “Huh!”

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Tom Tangney: “You and Luke. How different are the two of you? Aren’t you basically in an echo chamber of yourselves?”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2222

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As of the posting of these clips, at about the 52m 39.8s mark of the posted show, there is about a minute wall of static that happened due to a ghost in the podcart machine. For posterity, I have pulled a copy of the wall of static and have made it available for your listening enjoyment.

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Andrew: “But during the day, it’s too bright. I think she’s a vampire.”

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Andrew: “By the way, I was not a, not a very good host.”

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Andrew: “Fussy, narrative, and involved”

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Andrew: “I dare anybody to step to Theo”

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Andrew: “I don’t know. They have nowhere to go!”

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Andrew: “I mean, he’s a big-ass cat”

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Andrew: “I think enough people typed it in ‘Revelry’, because people are dumb like me.”

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Andrew: “I think it is net negative”

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Andrew: “I’m a prisoner within my own house!”

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Andrew: “I’m off my game today. Got a closet full of pee.”

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Andrew: “It’ll sound a lot like me yelling at my cat for peeing in my closet again.”

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Andrew: Laughing in the background

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Andrew: “Like, get out of–what are you doing!?! Get outta there!”

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Andrew: “No, I know what you mean!”

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Andrew: “Oh, no. Now all of the Costa Rican Tens are just gonna be… flooding that resort when I’m down there.”

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Andrew: “Oh, no. What’s, what’s wrong with me.”

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Andrew: “Oh. That’s, that’s outdated.”

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Andrew: Quietly saying “Secrets”

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Andrew: “She knows she’s in trouble. I yelled at her. I never yell at her, cuz I don’t think, I don’t think cats know.”

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Andrew: “She loves to lump it up”

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Andrew: Singing “If I had a new cat”

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: “That’s (the) Casio tone for the painfully uninsured.”

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Andrew: “The, um, oh, uh”

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Andrew: “They’re Sperry Masons, is actually what…”

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Andrew: “Where’s the article? I haven’t read the article!”

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Andrew: “Whoo!”

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Andrew: “Yeah! Yeah, it does.”

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Andrew: “Yes!”

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Andrew: “Yes! Very good!”

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Andrew: “You son of a bitch!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Is it time to thank our Coffee Lova donors of the day? Ohhh, shit. That, that will ruffle some feathers, my friend. That will ruffle some feathers.”

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Andrew and Luke: Woo hah!

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Luke: Chuckling

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Luke: Cute Chuckle

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Luke: Saying “Oh, Andrew” while Andrew was talking

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Luke: Saying “Olive!” in a high-pitched voice

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Luke: “Thank you for empathizing with Rudy”

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Luke: The Olive Garden

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Luke and Andrew: “I’ll be listening on, via cyber from my hotel room in Chicago, while I do my push-up challenge. Probably, naked. Whoo! Just have that, I want that in your mind (Whoo!) as you’re hosting Tom and Curley tomorrow. That’s something else.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Meet me at the mess hall… at 0600. (Don’t!)”

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Luke and Andrew: Thanking and apologizing to the Ked Woodley level donors

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2221

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Andrew: Andrew’s doing his part for the economy and his mic was muted for a second

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Andrew: “Cuz, I’m both a maker and a taker”

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Andrew: Deflated “Anyway. Power out.”

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Andrew: “Has no, nothing to do with the size of the bed”

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Andrew: “Hmm”

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Andrew: “How do you argue with crazy!?”

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Andrew: “I don’t know. Why are we doing this podcast?!! Who are you?”

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Andrew: “I gotta be the, either the goody two shoes or the wet blanket.”

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Andrew: “I was just a ball of nerves”

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Andrew: “It takes a podcast”

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Andrew: “It’s in… the computer!”

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “Oh, shit!”

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Andrew: “Like, it’s a vice presidential debate. Like, I don’t feel super bad just getting the highlights of this one tomorrow.”

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Andrew: “Oh my God, yes!”

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Andrew: Quietly saying “Sorry”

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Andrew: “Should I even bring this up? How are we doing on time? You want to talk about sports?”

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Andrew: Singing “Whole lot of snakin’ going on.”

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Andrew: “So, in this case, I’m just gonna say, ‘We.’ And, don’t make fun of me for calling myself a journalist.”

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Andrew: “Sorry everybody”

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Andrew: “This goes all the way to the top!”

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Andrew: “This husband is awful. This husband is awful.”

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Andrew: “Wait, weren’t you a Pa… Weren’t you a Page Six girl?”

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Andrew: “We should… I don’t know why I said ‘We'”

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Andrew: Whispering “Who are you?”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew was on fire and whizzed a lot of smokers

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Andrew and Luke: “It’s not the size of the bed, (Mmm-hmm) it’s the sound of the apnea.”

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Andrew and Luke: “Just like sleep (Right) breathing”

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Luke: Chuckling

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Luke: “Encyclopedia Very Brown”

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Luke: “Give me a break”

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Luke: “God, that’s so great!”

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Luke: “Hey compassionate dummies”

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Luke: “I mean, like… for real”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: Luke almost violated the no drinking or eating on the show rule put in place during #2220

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Luke: “My name is Luke Bur–I don’t know why I have the case of the giggles here, at the top of the show.”

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Luke: “Nah”

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Luke: “Never. Poop. At someone’s. House.”

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Luke: “Now, I’m hearing you’ll never eat on air again and I’m declaring victory over Emily, who loves the eating for all time. Victory is mine!”

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Luke: “Podcast hole”

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Luke: “This is the Pottery Barn Theory of Podcasting: You helped support it, so now you own it. So, we hope you like it. And, we thank you.”

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Luke: “Watch this space”

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Luke and Andrew: “And a midnight jaker. And a midnight jaker!”

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Luke and Andrew: “And then, at some point, I just yelled at the stereo and was like, ‘Please, let him finish.’ And then, Carey just looked at me like, (Wow) ‘Really, dude?'”

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Luke and Andrew: “Charles Rose of Lynnwood, Washington. Shit. Andrew, Charlie Rose is listening. Oh, no! And, look what’s next: Osgood.”

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Luke and Andrew: “I don’t understand how e-mail works, obviously. I wanna find… (Fibers?)”

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Luke and Andrew: “I got ’em, I got ’em, (Okay) I got ’em (Okay) I got… (I got it!) I got it, dude.”

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Luke and Andrew: “I hope you like it… cuz, you bought it. You okay over there? I sound like I’m Colin Powell trying to advise George W. Bush about Iraq. (Right)”

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Luke and Andrew: “In, in Soviet Russa, screen flips you (Yes)”

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Luke and Andrew: It rhymes or it chimes or it dimes

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Luke and Andrew: TBTL is the Cheesecake Factory of podcasts

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Luke and Andrew: The Conservation of Eating

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Luke and Andrew: “Whole lot of snakin’ going on. Whole lot of snakin’ going on.”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2220: Andrew Walsh Edition

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Andrew: “And, you know, I just handed it over to coach Genevieve to really run and manage the team”

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Andrew: Andrew couldn’t quite get words out

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Andrew: “Conflict! Conflict!”

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Andrew: “Did you get yourself a 3.1 sticker for the back of your car?”

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Andrew: Doesn’t want to get into what’s in his work e-mail right now

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Andrew: E-mail cleanup and growth potential

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Andrew: “Embarrassingly shitty”

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Andrew: “Goddamn it, Luke!”

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Andrew: “Haha”

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Andrew: “Hey man”

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Andrew: “Huh! People should find out about this podcast. It’s pretty good!”

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Andrew: “I don’t know if I get that”

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Andrew: “I have so much growth potential right now; like, I almost don’t know what to do with it.”

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Andrew: “I haven’t been a Mariners fan my entire life. I haven’t had my heart stomped on a million times by this team.”

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Andrew: “I know that I’m gonna sound just like the biggest loser, not the guy who lost a lot of weight”

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Andrew: “I remain optimistic”

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Andrew: “I’d prefer not to”

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Andrew: “I’m feeling real Tony Rizzo-y today”

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Andrew: “It’s closed!”

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “Oh, no”

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Andrew: “Like, if I put up with that three more years in a row, I’ll just end up putting my head through a wall too.”

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Andrew: “Luke, I’m frigging obsessed with it”

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Andrew: “Oh, good. Thanks for letting me know that; because, I’ve never heard of him before. Cuz, I’m not super smart.”

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Andrew: “Ooh, I like the Dumb Dumb girls!”

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Andrew: “Power out!”

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Andrew: (Re-)Discovering “WTF with Marc Maron”

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Andrew: “Should I change the name of my team, mid stream, to ‘Bortle bes the Scrivener'”

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: “That’s what I said! It’s, it’s closed!”

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Andrew: “This must hit your ears awful, in an awful way”

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Andrew: Weird “Ha!”

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Andrew: “What the fuck are you talking about”

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Andrew: “Whatever”

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Andrew: “Why does everybody love this guy so much?”

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Andrew: “Yeah, I agree with, I agr–I agree with that a hundred percent. I don’t know why I’m stuttering.”

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Andrew and Luke: Kind of Coitus

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Andrew and Luke: “Luke, you and I have been seeing a lot of each other lately. Yes we have.”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2220: Luke Burbank Edition

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Luke: “13.1 humblebrags?”

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Luke: “And I’m in the car going ‘Raúl Juliá. Raúl Juliá. Raúl Juliá!’ and Carey goes, ‘Hey, welcome to the experience of everyone who listens to TBTL'”

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Luke: “As per ushe, I was completely wrong”

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Luke: “Freedom!”

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Luke: Giggling

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Luke: “Give me a brark”

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Luke: “Here we don’t go again with the e-mails today; and, there’s a reason for that.”

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Luke: “Hey, Smallsy! Smallsy, you got that piece of tape?”

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Luke: “I could be forgetting some, so don’t get mad at me… one listener who’s left still. Probably Mike Frizzell, just being like, ‘I’m recovering from surgery. I’m trapped listening to this nightmare.'”

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Luke: “I didn’t know that we could keep someone from last season”

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Luke: “‘I wonder what summa-bitch got this guy’ and then I look at my match up, and I’m like ‘Oh, drop bears'”

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Luke: “It’s, it’s so Bavarian. There’s no escaping how Bavarian it is.”

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Luke: “Mike first took a shine to her because of the comments that she would write on various TBTL-related sites that were so funny… and mean, basically.”

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Luke: “Now, weirdly, this is a strange season in the NFL”

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Luke: “Our takes are so hot”

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Luke: Saying “If you started Roethlisberger in your fantasy team, you’re ecstatic!” as Al Michaels

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Luke: “They have two different stations: they have a water station and they have a yowza station.”

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Luke: “We haven’t had any medical emergencies on this show, we just have a payroll emergency called: this show is basically a public radio show”

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Luke: “You gotta stop eating! It’s killing me!”

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Luke: “You know that TBTL is emerging as one of the leading American podcasts on all things Aussie”

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Luke and Andrew: “Don’t… fucking pitch to that guy! (Mmm-hmm)”

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Luke and Andrew: “How about ‘Shout Your A-Bortles’? Oh my God.”

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Luke and Andrew: “I did a thing too! (Mmm-hmm)”

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Luke and Andrew: “I sent out a, a little tweeter spoof one time I was driving past a… Aren’t those leggings?”

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Luke and Andrew: “I was at two-hundred eighty-eight percent of the capacity. Which, I don’t know math, but that seems like more than you can have. Really?”

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Luke and Andrew: “If you don’t know, the Little Red Bandwagon is the podcast about this podcast, that neither Andrew nor I listen to; because, we’d probably get our feelings hurt. Yes.”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke has a GoFundMe page for his hangnail problem

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Luke and Andrew: “Oh, which part of Texas am I supporting with my good thoughts right now? Right.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Our hotel was a hundred dollars a night, Andrew! And it was… Did you have to poop in a closet? Have to, or got to?”

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Luke and Andrew: “Peace. Bye-bye.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Put downs, always accompanied by a put up. Exactly! As we’ve, as we’ve talked about on this show.”

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Luke and Andrew: “When you built a trebuchet this bitching, (Right, what are you going to do) you can’t hide your sugar on the shelf. No.”

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Luke and Andrew: Whiteness Gold-Plated or Whiteness Diamond Boat

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