Category: Audio Clips

Andrew: “But, I have a McDonald’s cup! I don’t wanna carry it around everywhere!”

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Andrew: “But, right now, I’m just embarrassing myself”

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Andrew: “Contain, contain, contain”

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Andrew: “Cuz, I keep on getting up to let Theo in and out; cuz, he’s being an asshole”

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Andrew: “Geez, Louise!”

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Andrew: “God willing, it’s all gone by Monday”

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Andrew: “I don’t have a rumpus”

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Andrew: “I don’t know why–Because, you know why?”

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Andrew: “I don’t know why. You… wanna know why?”

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Andrew: “I find this mostly un-relatable and not very funny”

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Andrew: “I think that it’s hard!!”

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Andrew: “I’m gonna watch you compost”

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Andrew: “I’m gonna watch you compost over the next several months”

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Andrew: “I’m sorry! I’m sorry!”

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Andrew: “It boings open”

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Andrew: “Landon? What are you doin’?”

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Andrew: Making a growling-like sound

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Andrew: Making a sexy growling sound

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Andrew: “Oh, no. I’ve eaten too much”

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Andrew: “On the days that they decide to skip pick-up and then lie with their lying faces to my truth-telling face”

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Andrew: “So, everything that happens after July… screw it!”

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Andrew: “Tater tots next to a Hot Pocket? Amen”

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Andrew: “Terri-poo”

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Andrew: “Well, I have a dog; and, I don’t wanna be carrying their poop around all the time!”

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Andrew: “Well, then, you shouldn’t have bought McDonald’s, bub!”

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Andrew: “Yeah, I, I eat the whole thing… and, then I poop in the woods”

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Luke: “Boy, that’s a… heck of a sizzling intro”

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Luke: “I have a pretty face, slim waist… and a, a big behind”

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Luke: “I have an okay rumpus”

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Luke: “I’m gonna put a, very hot, sizzling take out… on this holiday Monday, Andrew”

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Luke: “Sans poop”

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Luke: Singing “Hot Pretzels”

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Luke and Andrew: “You know what? We’re allowed to make that joke. You’re not… (Yeah, that’s right)”

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Andrew: “Bingo, boingo, bango?”

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Andrew: “Don’t toss it to me; cuz, I’ll just make a farting sound”

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Andrew: “I didn’t blow that one, Luke”

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Andrew: “I don’t understand all of them; but, I know that they’re dazzling in some way”

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Andrew: “I just froze so bad”

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Andrew: “Oh my God, yeah… God, if sausage were a vaccine”

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Andrew: “Sorry that I really went bummer there”

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Andrew: “That’s the show that… I bombed”

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Andrew: “This is where I’m being stupid”

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Andrew: “Wait-wait-wait-wait… wait-wait-wait… wait, wait, wait, wait”

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Andrew: “We need… to get this… shit in people’s arms”

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Andrew: “What is it, opposite day?”

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Andrew: “What… is this?”

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Andrew: “Why would I stoke… the flames… of… optimism?”

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Andrew: “Why would I stoke… the flames… of… optimism? That’s not what I’m here to do”

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Andrew: “You’ll like this. I don’t like this”

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Andrew: “You’re gonna hate… so much about this”

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Andrew and Luke: Getting indirectly mentioned for pointing Andrew towards a program that allow him to play Hex Empire on his computer

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Andrew and Luke: “It’s a good tease… I wanna stick around! Don’t act so surprised! Okay”

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Andrew and Luke: “Well, that makes me slightly (Well) less dumb”

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Luke: “A super dookie”

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Luke: “How do I respond to that?”

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Luke: “I can’t make it that long!”

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Luke: Making a farting sound

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Luke: Saying “Introducing the double touchdown!” and singing the hook from “Bad to the Bone”

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Luke: Singing the hook from “Bad to the Bone”

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Andrew: “A bird in the van is worth two in the bush”

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Andrew: “A couple of ‘pologies”

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Andrew: “I am home. The grocery store is home for me”

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Andrew: “I can feel victimized really quickly; and, it’s an ugly, poisonous place to live”

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Andrew: “I don’t even wanna do this show with you right now. I wanna go out and I wanna take some photos”

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Andrew: “I finally found the interesting part of this stupid story. Here’s the relatable part”

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Andrew: “I was there; but, I did not do it”

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Andrew: “I’m a middle-aged… bearded guy with glasses”

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Andrew: “It felt like a drug deal!”

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Andrew: “It wasn’t interesting then and it won’t be interesting now”

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Andrew: “It’s a new year… It’s a new you… It’s a new Dummies”

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Andrew: “Literally… nothing bad can happen”

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Andrew: “Maybe we’ll meet again in this parking lot someday, Gil”

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Andrew: “Poor Jon Greenberg just doesn’t have those ears anymore”

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Andrew: Saying “Charlie bit my finger” in a funny manner

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Andrew: Saying “Hello, everybody. Welcome to Hey Dummies. This is a TBTL newsletter video… Huhhh” in an un-enthusiastic manner

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Andrew: “Yeah! It was weird. He had a very kissable mask”

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Andrew: “You can pull it. You can push it”

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Andrew and Luke: Spoofing around with the name “Piquenaut”

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Luke: “I actually thought the music seemed hotter than normal in my ears”

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Luke: “I know you don’t like me doing it… but, I don’t care”

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Luke: “It’s two lakes to ‘pologize, Andrew”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Like, that’s not how any of this works!”

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Luke: “My boy Lou!!”

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Luke: Singing a portion of “Sabre Dance”

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Luke and Andrew: “No question is… too… sexual… for us to answer (Whoa!)”

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Andrew: “Can I… tell you why I’m supposed to meet a stranger at a mall?”

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Andrew: “Do you consider noon to be morning; or, did I just reveal a lot about my… lifestyle?”

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Andrew: “Dude, you got a debt”

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Andrew: “Either way, I’m going up Tiger Mountain”

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Andrew: “He is hot”

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Andrew: “How about talking about my sexism for a second though, man”

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Andrew: “I wanna know what ‘Rock ‘n’ Roll Tears’ is too!”

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Andrew: “I… hate doing it”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Making a buzzer sound

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Andrew: Saying “Discount double-check” and snoring

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Andrew: “The year was 1976. A young Andrew Walsh was born in Fairview Hospital”

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Andrew: “There’s something about the wild west of Craigslist”

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Andrew: “They’re not effing around… I can’t get in!”

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Andrew: “‘You can’t stop that… rocket arm!’ God, I hate him so much”

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Andrew and Luke: “Talking about f-stops and… doo-dads (Mmm-hmm)”

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Andrew and Luke: “Wait. How many tweets have you written about Jake from State Farm? It’s the only thing I tweet about now… He is hot”

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Luke: “Dude, you’re getting a debt!”

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Luke: “No touching!!!”

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Luke: “Top 10 signs your booty be stankin'”

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Luke and Andrew: “You gotta have an air and a spare… (Right) Obvs (Exactly)”

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