Tag: Andrew Walsh

A listener sung “Old Dan Tucker” as a message on the TBTL voicemail line and finished it with a nice “Power out”.

Listener: Singing “Old Dan Tucker”

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Andrew: “Ahhh, scratch that itch!”

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Andrew: “But, trigger warning for the phrase… ‘dick autographs'”

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Andrew: “Guys, guys, guys!”

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Andrew: “Hey, Spike. What do you like?”

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Andrew: “I got the ‘stick it up your ass’ part”

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Andrew: “It’s Starfucker!”

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Andrew: “Lemme, lemme start with these two shorties”

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Andrew: “Luke, are you a bio-diesel human?”

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Andrew: “Oh, dang”

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Andrew: “Oh, dang… my GPS is off again”

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Andrew: “Oh, whatever you say… just try not to hurt me”

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Andrew: “Okay… enough ridiculousness. I am now fully closed… clothed”

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Andrew: “Quick update: I am now undressed again”

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Andrew: “Sounds like someone’s got a case of the used-tos”

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Andrew: “This is a very Andrew take on this”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew has a filthy secret at the top of the show

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Andrew and Luke: “Hey, Luke… You wanna know a secret? Yes. A, a filthy secret that’s gonna make the listeners feel uncomfortable?”

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Luke: “Be there, or be beheaded”

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Luke: “Can I just order from you?”

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Luke: Cute laugh

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Luke: “Give me a brark”

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Luke: “I think… there’s something beautiful about me just sitting in a… Hilton Garden Inn towel… on a shitty office chair, talking to you, for one or two hours”

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Luke: “I’ll see you in Hell!”

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Luke: “It… is a catastro-fuck”

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Luke: “It’s just… it’s a disaster”

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Luke: Saying “If you like an unbeeped version… you can… visit our website” as Ira Glass

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Luke: Singing “Here-a-dear-a-dear-a [ph] about an hour ago”

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Andrew: “A lot of those texts that you and I were sending back and forth, or e-mails and TBTL planning stuff… That was all sent from my phone… from my boudoir”

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Andrew: “At the time, I had been doing a lot of thinking about… sex robots. Don’t… don’t… take that out of context”

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Andrew: “But, then, if I stay in bed and lollygag”

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Andrew: “But, you’re right. I should just remember Crocodile Dundee. It’s not Alligator Dundee”

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Andrew: “Can we talk about why I just called you Sean, by the way?”

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Andrew: “Don’t stop lollygagging’! Ge–Get up! Get over here!”

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Andrew: “God! What a long, dumb story”

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Andrew: “I did not look at the sky!”

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Andrew: “I mean, it’s dark. I don’t mean to laugh at this shit”

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Andrew: “I’ll just say it; so, you don’t think I’m… hiding something weird”

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Andrew: “If I can get through one week without fighting a homeless guy, man. That’s all I’m just trying to do. That’s what the doctor says… for my own mental health”

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Andrew: “Impenetrable shrubbery”

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Andrew: “In the Dark, Season Three: TBTL Edition”

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Andrew: “Just do this online, ya dinguses!”

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Andrew: Making rabbling sounds

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Andrew: “Meow”

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Andrew: “Not the mama!”

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Andrew: “Quote me on that, lady!!”

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Andrew: Singing “Let’s go Outback tonight… Let’s pretend we’re in Antarctica”

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: Snorting #2

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Andrew: “Spoiler”

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Andrew: “That’s Kate Winslet, you idiot”

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Andrew and Luke: “Our job is to get drunk (Our job is get drunk and dare each other, dare each other to sit on the Nutcracker seat)”

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Andrew and Luke: Publican and Republican

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Andrew and Luke: “Then, I… scurried quickly to the grocery store, where I got some take out food from Whole Foods. And, brought it back here and shoved it in my face (What did you go with?)”

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Luke: Annoyed “Yes!”

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Luke: “Conor… Mulcahy!”

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Luke: “Conor… Mulcahy!” #2

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Luke: Cute laugh

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Luke: “If it’s yellow, let it mellow”

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Luke: “It’s a mummy!!”

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Luke: Singing the “In The Dark” theme

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Luke: “Uhh, how about… like… uh, a quickie?”

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Luke: “We’ll be back here tomorrow with more imaginary radio. Until then… go bagels, go eat a Mariners”

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Luke: “What the hell?”

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Luke and Andrew: “The second time I got Bilbo’d by a cat, I’d be like, ‘Fuck these animals!’ (Right)”

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Luke and Andrew: “This is from New York City. New York City!? Get the cat gloves… Meow”

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Andrew: Making some funk-grunge sounds

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Andrew: “Oh, God!!”

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Andrew: Singing “Oh-oh, oh-oh”

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Andrew and Luke: “Oh, shit! That’s gonna be a tough one! Oh, damn!”

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Andrew, David Burbank and Luke: Not scratching Andrew’s itches or pushing his pleasure center buttons

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David Burbank: “Is this a bad acid trip? What is going on in this show?”

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David Burbank: Mimicking cutting and editing used on certain songs

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David Burbank: “She is just doing her most millennial that she can millennial”

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David Burbank: “She’s the, the queen of the castle now”

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David Burbank and Andrew: “I still don’t, I don’t understand how Nacho Libre isn’t, like… racist. It is! It is?”

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Luke: “Are you the Andrew of everything?”

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Luke: Ghost in the Internet machine caused Luke’s audio to cut out and drop in pitch

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Luke: Making computer sounds

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Luke: Saying “Let’s thank some Donors of the Day” in sing-songy manner

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Luke: Saying “Oh, hi, Danny” as Tommy Wiseau

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Luke: Saying “Oh, hi, Tens” as Tommy Wiseau

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Luke: Singing “I would like to hold my little hand”

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Luke: Singing “Kiki… had an idea… it was a good one”

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Luke: “This is gonna be a, a fun… sexy time for all of us”

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Luke: “You came and you interviewed… and then, you turned your back on me”

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Luke and Andrew: “Are you the Internet? Yes”

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Luke and Andrew: Saying “Oh, hi, Andy. Oh, hi, Luke” as Tommy Wiseau

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Luke and Andrew: “Sorry, I’m trying to find David’s… drop… which, I usually… I dunno where it went. So… How does it go? I can’t think of it off the top of my head. I’d help… Oh, I found the drop… (Meow! I wanna be petted! Meow! I wanna be in there! Meow! Why are you closing the door on me?) That’s not how I remembered it”

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Andrew: “But, like, I’m just a fidgeter!”

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Andrew: “Chhhk-shh! That’s the sound of a beer opening… Bloop! That’s the sound of the XBOX going on… Chshhhhh! That’s the sound of Madden… 2018… firing up”

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Andrew: “I hate waking up”

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Andrew: “I’m a very lazy person”

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Andrew: “I’m gonna try to make an argument”

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Andrew: “Two… Three, four, f…ive… six, seven, eight, nine, ten… Eleven. Twelve”

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Andrew: “We need to push it down”

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Andrew: “Wow. I’m way off course here”

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Andrew and Luke: “How are we not on the radio? I don’t know. How are we not on the radio in 1986? I know… How are we not hosting the Buzzard Morning Show?”

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Andrew and Luke: “I have looked everywhere (Yes) a reasonable mind would look; now… (Yes) I have to get inside… of the brain (Yeah) of Crazy Andy. What did Crazy Andy maybe do?”

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Andrew and Luke: Luke’s not the only one who can do acoustic sound effects and if Andrew doesn’t want clips of him saying weird things, stop saying weird things

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Andrew and Luke: Saying “Ooh… Someone got the Blursday bomb” as Luke played a bomb sound effect

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Andrew and Luke: “Without even thinking about it; just, like, open somebody’s glovebox. Which, is a very… I mean, you don’t do that. Like… who knows what… that’s a private space for them (That’s where I keep my gloves!) Right. Oh my God. My very private gloves (Why all the gloves?)”

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Luke: “Happy Blursday bombs!”

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Luke: “I don’t know if you’ve ever done this. You’re, I think you’re much less of a scatterbrain than I am”

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Luke: “Okay. Let’s drop another Blursday bomb on this, Andrew”

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Luke: “Prepare the morning!”

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Luke: “So good!!”

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Luke: “Thanks for listening. Thank you for being part of TBTL… Go bagels! Or, go home”

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Luke and Andrew: “I love it when they call me Big Poppa… Yet, you hate it when I call you, ‘Daddy’! I don’t get this! What is with you? (I know. Life is full of irony) I can’t. I just want… tell me what I can and cannot say”

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Luke and Andrew: “I think the hot dog hat looks great, (Yes!) I will mention; (Awesome) but, when I wear it, it points directly at my boobs. Which… is, I don’t even understand… from an anatomy standpoint, how that’s happening; but, it is. And, I find that embarrassing”

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Luke and Andrew: “If I’m texting you, what it’s basically doing is… talking to my phone… talking to my laptop… You talking to my laptalk about my phone talk? (Oh, great)”

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Luke and Andrew: “It’s time to start an unreasonable search during unreasonable times (Yeah. Right)”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke and Andrew making air horn sounds and Luke saying “Remix” while a song is being played

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Luke and Andrew: Luke played a clip of Andrew saying something funny and acts like he did it by himself and is the reason why he had ghosted on meetings

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Luke and Andrew: Luke playing a clip of Andrew saying “Meow! I wanna be petted! Meow! I wanna be in there! Meow! Why are you closing the door on me?” and Andrew thinks Luke had help with that

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Luke and Andrew: “Until then… Go bagels, or go home… And, please remember: No mountain to tall… and, go eat a bagel”

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Andrew: “God, I hate myself”

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Andrew: “I’m drowning in shame!”

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Andrew: “It does not bother me”

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Andrew: “It’s, like, all Kars4Kids-y”

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Andrew: “R U naveling navels navel me?”

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Andrew: Saying “Oh, right” in a calm, ASMR-like manner

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Andrew: “Sorta seems like tit-for-tatty”

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Andrew: “That is a gross violation of my HIPAA protections. And, when I say, ‘gross,’ I mean in both senses of the word”

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Andrew: “This sounds like an un-Andrew… answer, I think”

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Andrew: “Whoa! How does that work?”

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Andrew: “Yeah. That hurts a little bit”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew asking Luke to hold on and wait a second

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew made a punny joke about a TBTL-a-thon donor’s last name

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Andrew and Luke: “That’s… an interesting question, I think… Finally! I came up with one! But, I don’t have an answer”

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Andrew and Luke: “Yeah. Well, also, you’ve never seen me with my shirt off. That’s, like, a crime against humanity… (Yet!)”

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Luke: “Again… this is, there’s nothing, there’s nothing logical about it… but, it’s just… it’s just a thing with me”

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Luke: Cute laugh

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Luke: “Donald Hall and the remaining members of Ratt come to the Emerald Queen Casino!”

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Luke: “Genevieve… she’s my down-ass B”

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Luke: “Get out the way… get out the way… get out the way”

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Luke: “I could not drown those kittens”

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Luke: “I think that’s kind of fun and flirty”

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Luke: “Is that his name? What was his full name again? And, now, I’m knocking a Diet Dr. Pepper off–I’m a mess today, Andrew”

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Luke: “It bothers me”

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Luke: “It’s time for… a… strongly worded… pink… ink… note, my friend”

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Luke: “Mission accomplished!”

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Luke: “Mr. Unlimited”

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Luke: “Really!?”

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Luke: Singing “Can we move your tree?”

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Luke: “Sun’s out, guns out, shirts off”

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Luke: “What!?!”

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Luke: “Why the obsession, Burbs?”

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Luke: “Yoink!”

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Luke: “Yoink! We’ll take the Burbanks'”

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Luke and Andrew: 24-hour sleep apnea

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Luke and Andrew: “I don’t wanna grow up… I’m in a shitty metal band… Korn with the ‘R’ backwards… And, remember, the ‘R’ is backwards!”

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Luke and Andrew: “I licky boom boom down (Mmm-hmm)”

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Luke and Andrew: “I’m drowning! Throw him a life jacket. (No!) No! Throw me a t-shirt! I’m drowning in shame!”

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Luke and Andrew: “I’m talking about your navel. That’s what I’m gazing at… I can’t even see my gavel anymore!”

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Luke and Andrew: “If it was my bin… (Right) If it was my neighbor behinds me bin. Behinds me? I know… You’re talking like me (Teeth! Teeth! They’re bones!)”

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Luke and Andrew: “We’ll see you tomorrow… Go Mariners, go bagels… Go bagels! Go bagels! Go bagels or go home! And, please remember: No mountain too tall. And, good luck to all”

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