Clips From TBTL #2440: Luke and Carey Burbank Edition

Luke: “And… even though he’s been filling in as the host of the show, he doesn’t think he’s better than anyone else, except… me. He thinks he’s better than me now. Maybe because he is.”

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Luke: “Because”

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Luke: “Boom! Roasted.”

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Luke: “Hola, friendos. It’s been awhile since I’ve rapped atcha”

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Luke: “I don’t know. What the hell is ‘Hodag’?”

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Luke: “I’m your host… Luke Burbank!”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: Making a funny sound

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Luke: “Oh my God in Heaven”

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Luke: “Oh my God!”

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Luke: “Oh my goodness gracious!”

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Luke: “Oh, Andrew”

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Luke: “Oh, well, you’re gonna use Scott Simon to speak on it!?”

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Luke: “People are not gonna like Krang”

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Luke: Singing “Baby”

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Luke: Still a little rusty after coming back from vacation and got the show number wrong, but then corrected himself

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Luke: “Technically, a balloon could do damage, in the sense that it would just blow your mind, and be awesome”

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Luke: “To, to generally depend on NPR’s pronuncers, [sic] pronouncers because… Think about the irony of mispronouncing the word pronouncer”

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Luke: “Two out of three Burbanks can’t be wrong! Rudy. Is it Tan-ya or Tahn-ya?”

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Luke: “What are you wooking at? What!? That’s a… that doesn’t even make sense.”

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Luke: “You don’t… effing understand the position you put me in when you choose door number two”

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Luke and Andrew: Andrew spoofs on a man from Superior, Wisconsin who thinks he’s better than everyone

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Luke and Andrew: “CanYouBelieveLukeIsBald.tv? Yeah!”

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Luke and Andrew: “I was considering writing down ‘Ass Gasket Fatigue’ as a… Nope! …show title. No… I just saved your ink. Now, I’m writing down, ‘Save Your Ink’ as show title.”

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Luke and Andrew: Laughing

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Luke and Andrew: Luke has a little Krang inside of him

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Luke and Andrew: “My vacation by the numbers: I went six days… without a shower… (Why!!?) not including swimming. Why!!? Well… because…”

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Luke and Andrew: “Well, you also shower twice a day. On a bad day.”

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Luke and Andrew: “What about Tanya Tucker? I just thought it was Tanya Tucker. Oh… Oh, Andrew. Really!? It’s not Tanya Tucker? Are you sure? Let me… just call my wife… Really? (She would know) ‘Really?’ I’m calling my wife or ‘Really?’ to it’s Tanya Tucker. Really to both.”

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Luke, Andrew and Carey Burbank: Discussing the pronunciation of Tanya Tucker’s first name

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Clips From TBTL #2440: Andrew Walsh Edition

Andrew: “Because, Andrew… understands… Luke”

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Andrew: “But, the thing is, when you’re gone, I gotta be present, man”

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Andrew: “God, I’m already ruining this show.”

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Andrew: Having a good laugh

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Andrew: “Huh! Just gonna do that, huh?”

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Andrew: “I don’t know why Andrew… Andrew annoys himself when he speaks in the third person. I’ll tell you that much.”

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Andrew: “Let me get to the point here.”

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Andrew: “Let me get to the point here. God, I’m already ruining this show.”

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Andrew: “Okay. Sure.”

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Andrew: “Really?”

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Andrew: “Sounds like I’m being a drama queen”

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Andrew: “Went to the bowling alley. Bowled some. Pulled some tabs. Pulled some muscles.”

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Andrew: “What’s going on? Did we just hit the end?”

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Andrew: “Why!!?”

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Andrew: “Why!!?” #2

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Andrew: “You can’t handle the inconvenience of this truth!”

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Andrew: “You guys are gallants [sic] and not goofuses [ph]

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Andrew: “You’re right… they do think they’re better than everyone else”

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Andrew: “You’re the best!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Dean-vere? Dean-vere, Colorado (Oh!)”

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Andrew and Luke: Luke asks if a French Dip is like a regular dip but with more tongue

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Andrew and Luke: “Oh God, we gotta, (Yeah!) we got one-sixteenth (Yeah!) of a gurgle in there too, it (That’s right) sounds like. That’s absolutely right.”

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Clips From TBTL #2438

Andrew: “Alright, I wanna tell you about Nugget… the crow that should be a motivational speaker”

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Andrew: “Can you believe it’s already August? First day felt like a week… August 31st”

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Andrew: “Come on, guys. What are we doing here?”

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Andrew: “Frankly, after what I’ve done to this show in the past couple of weeks, I don’t know if I’m even gonna have a job when he gets back. So, I say, we jam as much fun into today’s show as possible.”

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Andrew: Having a good laugh

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Andrew: “I did something a little weird today that I think kind of broke me a little bit”

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Andrew: “I don’t know”

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Andrew: “I don’t know if this is good TBTL or not; but, I gotta be honest with you. I’m not stopping this.”

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Andrew: “I love this story so much!”

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Andrew: “I think that crow is trying to teach itself how to fly!”

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Andrew: “I’m gonna be so bad at this”

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Andrew: “I’m just… horrible. I’m so out of shape. This is so embarrassing. I would never tell this on the show.”

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Andrew: “It was the best, dude”

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Andrew: “It was… so G-D great!”

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Andrew: “It’s time for a Thursday… Thursday. Gotta get down on Thursday edition of TBTL”

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Andrew: “Just kind of… memory-laning”

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Andrew: “Like yesterdoodle”

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Andrew: “My point is, someday I’m gonna learn how to ride a bike!”

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Andrew: “No, you don’t know me!”

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Andrew: “Oh my God… I felt almost sick”

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Andrew: “That makes me feel… things”

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Andrew: “The bird… starts teaching itself how to fly!”

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Andrew: “The story of… an ordinary crow… that did… an extraordinary thing. I just, I didn’t, I didn’t mean to slip into Casey Kasem there; but, I think I did.”

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Andrew: “What is a bad boy to do? I know I’ve Googled that before. What is a bad boy the do?”

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Andrew: “What the eff!!!?”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “But, she said that she would go back to the zoo… and… visit her… her.. you know, her former crows. (Yeah!) Her former crow-leagues. Oh, (As) sure. Nice. As I’m sure she likes to call them. Oh, yeah. Her crow-workers. Why didn’t I say that?”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “How does satellite radio work, Phyllis? I’ll show ya”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “I’m hot, man! Dude! I’m hot and wheezy. Did you hear me wheezing during that intro? Did you hear my… lungs crackle?”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “I’m too… why is that (Sexy for my shirt?)”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “Is there a song by Billy Joel about… (In the middle of the night) Yeah, I’m gonna be like, ‘That’s gonna be my denial song!'”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “Now, Genevieve… is gonna tell me I have a ‘One In, One Out’ policy (Ohh) with mugs. (Uh-oh) So, I guess I gotta throw away the Walsh Manufacturing mug. Thanks a lot, guys!”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “Oh, we got one! Oh my God, (Now, I’m depressed!) we got one! We got one!”

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Andrew and Phyllis Fletcher: “You know, P word this… By the way… the P word is not Phyllis… by the way, in this case (Right)”

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Phyllis Fletcher: Cawing like a crow

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Phyllis Fletcher: Cawing like a crow #2

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Phyllis Fletcher: Drawn out “Nugget!”

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Phyllis Fletcher: “Dude!”

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Phyllis Fletcher: “Errr!”

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Phyllis Fletcher: Laughing

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Phyllis Fletcher: “Oh my God!”

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Phyllis Fletcher: “Oh, poor you”

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Phyllis Fletcher: Singing “In the middle of the night”

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Phyllis Fletcher: “Uh, what!!!?”

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Phyllis Fletcher: “Word!”

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Clips From TBTL #2437: A Song of Ice and Spoilers Edition

Andrew: “Alright, we told you it was coming, just like Winter. Am I right? Oh, God!”

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Andrew: “And, I said, ‘I dunno, just stuff like, I dunno. Like, you know, that kind of thing. Does that answer your question?'”

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Andrew: “Could he download some Hooked On Fucking Phonics!?”

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Andrew: Drawn out “Aw, yeah”

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Andrew: “I feel like there’s a modern example of, of that. I mean… I can’t think of one.”

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Andrew: “Life is just full of surprises when you raise a kid to be dumb”

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Andrew: “No… This happens all the time. People die and other people replace them.”

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: “Sure. What are you talking about?”

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Andrew: “We’ve seen them: pre-coitus, post-coitus and coitus”

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Andrew: “You know, Olenna’s… Tyrell’s final scene… is… just… so badass. It’s so badass”

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Andrew and Nick Jarin: “Again, I’m all about revenge. I know, you’re all about revenge.”

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Andrew and Nick Jarin: “Huh, time to wake up. Yeah”

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Andrew and Nick Jarin: “I just don’t like it when people get hollered at. That’s… that’s what stresses you out?”

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Nick Jarin: “Again, spoiler alert for World War II history… the Nazis lost that one”

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Nick Jarin: “I’m a host, I don’t have to cosplay!”

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Nick Jarin and Andrew: “Are you quoting yourself? Yeah, right. I never do that… to you.”

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Nick Jarin and Andrew: “Hey, bud! (Hey!) You smell like family. What’s up?”

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Nick Jarin and Andrew: “I’m a host, I don’t have to cosplay! Yes, you do.”

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Clips From TBTL #2437

Andrew: “And they tweetered out a tweet”

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Andrew: “And, you have your own kind of Marsupial Gurgle thing going on on your show. You have a guy who’s archiving just all kinds of bits and pieces of your show, going back like… to 2008!”

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Andrew: “But, there’s one in my neighborhood that isn’t!!”

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Andrew: “But, you have sent me a whole bunch… that I have labeled as ‘Bean drops’, but I don’t know what they’re from”

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Andrew: “Goddamn! I haven’t grabbed anything in forever.”

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Andrew: “Holy shit. I was not ready for that New Orleans.”

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Andrew: “I guess I didn’t know it. I guess I didn’t know it.”

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Andrew: “I will say, though, the one thing is, he’s been scratching his radio itch with my microphone”

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Andrew: “I’m cutting all that out, by the way. You’re not getting free plugs on this show.”

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Andrew: “I’m gonna make this the questions… of the day”

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Andrew: “It’s a dazzling Denny’s detail!”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Saying “Bean!” in a sing-songy manner

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Andrew: “This is never gonna end! It’s just gonna be a constant loop!”

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Andrew: “Well… I guess I can expect a note from the lawyers over at KROQ… for that intro”

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Andrew: “Your whole life is just sucking… up. Not sucking. Your whole life is not sucking.”

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Andrew and Bean Baxter: “I have been talking about my beard a lot lately. And, I… Genevieve? Oh, God!”

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Andrew and Bean Baxter: “I think those guys could, should get together… Linh and Kevin. (And do a podcast) And do a podcast! Yes! I would so listen to that! And then, you know what I will do: I will archive that podcast. I’ll clip it up and (I like it) grab clips.”

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Andrew and Bean Baxter: “What is that from? I don’t know!”

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Andrew and Nick Jarin: “This is never gonna end! It’s just gonna be a constant loop! You guys are stuck in this hell with me! Time is a flat circle. Linh Pham is gonna download the podcast and just see the infinity symbol and say, ‘I can’t cut up the show today’.”

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Bean Baxter: “Kids, here’s the thing about TBTL… entertaining… and educational”

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Bean Baxter: Singing “Wah-wah-wah-wah”

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Bean Baxter: “You can’t understand why somebody would be so dedicated to either your show or mine; but, God bless them for doing it”

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Bean Baxter and Andrew: Doing a quick impression of The Hulk

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Bean Baxter and Andrew: “How dare you, Andrew? Because, the Kevin and Bean Show contains multitudes. And, second of all… Yeah, maybe we did! Maybe we did something like that (What was it about!?)”

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Bean Baxter and Andrew: “Twice as old as the city of Seattle. Two-hundred ninety-nine years old! (Well, it’s not a contest!)”

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Bean Baxter and Andrew: “What’s the deal with this, this… the TBTL archivist? The Marsupial Gurgle. What’s that’s guy… Oh, yeah. Linh, Linh Pham”

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Bean Baxter and Nick Jarin: “No mountain too tall! And, good luck to all.”

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Clips From TBTL #2436

Andrew: “ASSBOT”

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Andrew: “Aww, shit! It’s the Yoders. Everybo–Yoder! We have a Code Yoder!”

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Andrew: “But, is he okay!?”

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Andrew: “First, though, is everybody’s new favorite segment, Bean!”

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Andrew: “Goddamn it!!! Are you shitting me!!?”

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Andrew: “Good Lord!!!”

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Andrew: “He is… a psychopath”

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Andrew: “Hello, family! My little podcast family”

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Andrew: “I’m large, I’m in charge, and I’m not taking garbage off of anybody”

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Andrew: “Just, Jaden. Please tell me that’s Jaden!”

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Andrew: “Luke Burbank, and his shaved head, are still on vacation”

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Andrew: “Really?!?”

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Andrew: Saying “Goddamn it!!” and laughing

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Andrew: “Seriously?!?”

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Andrew: “That’s what the couple of weeks have been about. Less about TBTL, and just more about me showing off that I have cool friends.”

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Andrew: “This, this segment may be the worst segment that I’ve ever done. What about you?”

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Andrew: “We have, what I think, is like, the Beaniest story to ever Bean.”

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Andrew: “Welcome to the 90s”

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Andrew: “What the hell is that from!?”

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Andrew: “What the hell!!”

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Andrew: “What’s the least amount of dress you’ve ever been during a show?”

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Andrew: “Which is real passive-aggressive; but, you know, that’s kind of my thing. I am in Seattle.”

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Andrew: “Women can be friends now too, Bean”

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Andrew and Bean Baxter: Andrew asks what is the least amount of dress Bean has been doing a show and Bean thinks the answer Andrew wants is doing a show naked

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Andrew and Bean Baxter: “He’s a bit of a, he’s a bit of a wackadoo, right? Is that the term? (He is)”

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Andrew and Bean Baxter: “Oh my God! You just want to throw in the towel? No! I wanna keep hearing these damn things.”

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Bean Baxter: “Alright, you’re just playing, you’re just playing Mad-Libs now. None of this is happening.”

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Bean Baxter: “Are you happy with how you pooped all over this story?”

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Bean Baxter: “But, thanks to stupid Al Gore, it’s now freaking hot here all summer long, every year”

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Bean Baxter: “Dude. Uncool!”

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Bean Baxter: “I don’t love long pants”

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Bean Baxter: “I’ll go through Arkansas and I can stop in, while I’m there, and see the Bill Clinton Presidential Library”

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Bean Baxter: “No time for chit-chat, son!”

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Bean Baxter: “Okay. Bye, Andrew!”

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Bean Baxter: “She’s kind of woo-woo, like, Stevie Nicks’ kind of woo-woo, you know?”

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Bean Baxter: “Welcome to our new game: Will Andrew Get One Right?”

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Bean Baxter: “Why would you ask me that!?”

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Bean Baxter and Andrew: “Well, there are ten total in the quiz, (Okay) we don’t have to do them all. Yes we do. I’m a completist. (Alright)”

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