Clips From TBTL #2092: Andrew Walsh Edition

Andrew: “And in the four minute drive from there to my home, I’m like, with one hand, just shoving this burrito in my face.”

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Andrew: “Boy, I’m really good at ghost story segments, aren’t I!”

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Andrew: “But no man should eat a burrito the way I just ate a burrito.”

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Andrew: “Cuz now you’re a man who sits in writer’s rooms and makes ha-ha”

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Andrew: “Eight-Two-Eight-Fuggedaboutit!”

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Andrew: Flat “Wow.”

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Andrew: “Guac lungs”

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Andrew: “I am gonna crash hard on this show.”

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Andrew: “I give it like fifteen seconds, I’m about to be brain dead.”

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Andrew: “I need to stop talking. I’m sorry.”

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Andrew: “If I remember it correctly and, if I’m getting it wrong, people gonna be mad!”

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Andrew: “It’s a Hidden Valley party in my mouth!”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing #2

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “You’re moving in the wrong direction!”

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Andrew: “My name is Andrew Walsh, and I’m a podcaster!”

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Andrew: “No, I don’t believe in gravity.”

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Andrew: “Number One, make it so!”

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Andrew: “Oh, of course!”

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Andrew: “Oh, please Walsh!”

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Andrew: “Sheesh!”

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: “That movie stresses me out!”

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Andrew: “That one kind of got me.”

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Andrew: “That’s the burrito talking. That’s the burrito and the pot of coffee I’m drinking from talking.”

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Andrew: “Wait, I want to talk to you about the space stories!”

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Andrew: “Yeah!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Don’t worry, it’s only a ten minute loop of that apparently… Yeah, I saw that too and chose not to play it, because I’m better than that. And a dollar short!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Exposition, (Hey!) Rising Action, Climax, Falling, Resolution.”

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Andrew and Luke: “You and I never signed off of on this, you and I never encouraged it, you and I never even said it was a good idea. Which explain why it’s been a success. Right!”

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Clips From TBTL #2091

Andrew: “And somebody better fucking note this on the TBTL Wiki Page.”

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Andrew: “Anyway, we have space issues in our new place; so, I need my CD drawers for something else… mostly drugs.”

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Andrew: “Boy, the therapist might have been right!”

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Andrew: “But here’s where I’m gonna say something somewhat hurtful”

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Andrew: “I don’t know, we’re biting the heads off of bats, and rats, and there’s blood, and the tongues, and the make up, and the paint.”

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Andrew: “I don’t wanna be here, I don’t wanna talk!”

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Andrew: “I have some nerve saying what I’m about to say, as somebody who has chosen not to have children”

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Andrew: “I just don’t like to do things.”

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Andrew: “I’m back, baby!”

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Andrew: “I’m super, super high strung.”

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Andrew: “I’ve been watching, like, like, a shit-ton of Murder She Wrotes.”

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Andrew: “It’s a cat!”

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Andrew: Meekly singing “I want to rock and roll”

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Andrew: “Oh, Andrew.”

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: Sound of a whip cracking and Andrew saying “Wait, I don’t know what that was, but here…”

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Andrew: “Well, I guess I’m never gonna see most of you ever again.”

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Andrew: “You guys, I’m a mess… up in this mouth.”

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Andrew and Luke: “Everything is just perfect about this joke and this plan (Love it) and this spoof. We done good work here today Luke. Yes. Take the rest of the afternoon off! Okay, I always do.”

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Andrew and Luke: “It’s my fault. Umm, no-no-no-no-no. It’s, it’s-a, it’s mostly your fault.”

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Andrew and Luke: Marsupial Gurgle Name Drop

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Andrew and Luke: “Ya follow me? Right. Ya follow me!?!”

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Luke: “Bellingham, Washington. The Bay City.”

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Luke: “Hey, you’re fine.”

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Luke: “I helped my dad put that sign in!”

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Luke: “My name is Luke Burbank and I am your host!”

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Luke: Scatting

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Luke: Scatting #2

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Luke: “She showed you a butterfly and you said ‘Bitch had it coming’?”

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Luke: “Uh, Pod Dog? Pod–where is (Perro) Pod-dog? She’s nowhere to be found. You know what? She’s turned into a real teenager. Doesn’t want to be seen with her old man recording a podcast, or the family business, as it were.”

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Luke: “Why is everyone just suck, and I am awesome?”

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Luke and Andrew: “Fuck this place!!! Yes!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Here’s the thing that amazes me, someone’s is putting that shit in Wikipedia! Really?!?”

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Luke and Andrew: Laughing

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Luke and Andrew: Luke starts singing “In the flight of the angels, fly away” and then starts scatting

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Luke and Andrew: “Nice walking! (Yeah, right) You really put the toddle on toddler.”

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Clips From TBTL #2090

Andrew: “And now, he’s just Elmer Fudding it up up there.”

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Andrew: “Geez, Louise!”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Leave me and my family alone.”

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Andrew: “Like, why? Uhhh!”

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Andrew: “My name is Andrew Walsh, and I’m a podcaster.”

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Andrew: “Only two percent of Chesney songs ever come back!”

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Andrew: “So, I have the only mortal cat… in the world.”

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Andrew: “Talk!”

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Andrew: “That… makes me sad.”

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Andrew: “This is a very neighborhoody neighborhood I live in, if you know what I mean.”

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Andrew: “You wanna get a little taste of my isolated vocals, check this out: My name is Andrew Walsh, and I’m a podcaster.”

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Andrew: “You’re not very good at communicating with humans.”

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Andrew: “Your bruhs. Your bros.”

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Andrew and Luke: “Yeah, it’s been kind of a shh… Swear alert. You can say it. Shitty weekend. What if I had said shiny?”

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Luke: “Avoid The Noid”

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Luke: “Broadcasting from the Burbank Springs Production Facilities perched atop Alabama Hills.”

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Luke: “Dude, I got something. Oh dude, what is it? Dude, come over here. Dude.”

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Luke: “He’s up in Canadia.”

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Luke: “I don’t know why I’m being such a grumpus”

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Luke: Imitating Pitbull

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Luke: “It’s because she’s paralyzed with fucking fear!”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: Laughing #2

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Luke: “Oh, and today is, it’s the first day of baseball season!”

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Luke: Reciting lyrics from Kenny Chesney’s “Noise”

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Luke: Reciting more lyrics from Kenny Chesney’s “Noise”

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Luke: Replacing “Noise” with “Noid” while reciting lyrics from Kenny Chesney’s “Noise”

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Luke: Singing “Who combed the dog off?”

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Luke: “Speaking of fireballs, my friend Andrew Walsh is there in the Wallingford neighborhood of Seattle.”

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Luke: “That’s why it’s good that you’re you, and I’m not you.”

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Luke: “The Charmin Bears that just shit on everything!”

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Luke: “The Only Mortal Cat”

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Luke: “Then we move on to hip-hop’s Latin Elmer Fudd, Pitbull.”

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Luke: “This is the future!”

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Luke: “Using this fur comb-thing-device that I maniacally, kind of, rake her down with every morning in the yard now, in the backyard.”

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Luke: “We will all cross our fingers, for, for the return of Theo; or, Theo just having a bitchin’ final act.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Give me a brark on all of that. Give me a brark.”

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Luke and Andrew: “That’s not helping. No!!! That’s what I thought! That’s not helping!”

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Clips From TBTL #2089

Andrew: “Apparently”

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Andrew: “April Fools!”

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Andrew: “Don’t worry about it, they’ll come back. Put on another Family Guy!”

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Andrew: “Good Lord!”

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Andrew: Good News and Bad News re: Luke’s Shirt Showering

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Andrew: “Hello, Luke. I’m not feeling funny this morning.”

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Andrew: “I need to remember that people listen to this.”

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Andrew: “If my phone rings and it’s Professor Bananas, I will have to pick it up.”

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Andrew: “Is it over?”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Show title!”

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Andrew: “Whoa!”

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Andrew: “Whoo! Good Lord! I need to burn this podcast. We need to start a new podcast.”

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Andrew and Luke: “Hmm. Wait, what? What’s that? Her? Huh? Egg?”

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Andrew and Luke: “I gotta say we’re off to a hot start. Wow!!! Well, I think we know your new intro on the show, Andrew.”

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Andrew and Luke: “We’re catless in Seattle right now. Wait, what?”

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Andrew and Luke: “Which is good, cuz you’re in Sacramento and there’s plenty of water in California these days. Oh, my God… you son of a bitch.”

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Luke: “And I do mean, for once, morning edition. Ooh, did I just violate a trademark or a copyright by saying those words next to each other?”

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Luke: “Andrew ‘The Funny Detectorist’ Walsh”

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Luke: “Andrew, no less pressing.”

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Luke: “By the way, how dare you water shame me from Seattle! You don’t even live here anymore.”

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Luke: “Hey, uh, uh, uh, uh, notice me Senpai… in the kitchen.”

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Luke: “I am gonna leave the water running, just to spite you.”

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Luke: “It’ll be fine!”

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Luke: “Me too!”

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Luke: “See? This is because I’m from the Northwest and I live in the Northwest, Andrew; where, the water flows like wine, or something.”

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Luke: “What did I do!!?”

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Luke: “Whoo!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Andrew, you gotta stay woke. What is that?”

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Luke and Andrew: Getting Woke on Alabama Hot Pocket

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Luke and Andrew: “New York City. New York City?”

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Luke and Andrew: “Swearing alert. Okay, everybody? Yep. I’m about to say a swear word. I’m taking off my headphones. Fuckboy. That’s trending right now. Is it over? Can I put my headphones back on? Yep. Okay, good.”

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Luke and Andrew: “You got woke my friend. Ah, you in New Hampshire now!”

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Clips From TBTL #2088

Andrew: Andrew doesn’t give a shit if he sounds like an old man

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Andrew: “Are you kidding me man? I love driving when I’m high! It’s just like, it’s just like, riding that magic carpet.”

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Andrew: “Because, that’s how insane people, like me, see the world.”

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Andrew: “Could you stop Swedesplaining this to me, please?”

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Andrew: “Hey, man, wanna, wanna roll a doobie?”

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Andrew: “I don’t know. I don’t think I’m touching it. I don’t think I’m messing with it.”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: “Where the weed is, is legal… and the… I’m out.”

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Andrew: “Yeah… Impregnate all the girls!”

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Andrew and Luke: “I’ve never been able to do a magic eye. Really? Yeah, my eyes are all jacked up.”

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Andrew and Luke: “Is this one of those situations where, no matter what happens here, I have to laugh, right? Mmm-hmm, yes. Okay. It is one, it’s exactly one of those situations.”

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Andrew and Luke: “Just what the hell is going on with the youth of America? This is exactly what I’m trying to figure out, Walsh!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Oh, ‘Sleeping With The Enemy’! ‘Sleeping With The Enemy’, I just thought of it (Yes), Andrew. Edit to that point, will ya? You’re leaving all of this in as proof. I am not, I’m gonna edit, I’m gonna edit! Um, I don’t know. I might leave it in.”

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Luke: “All you do is spin around. It’s all you dos is get dizzy.”

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Luke: “Bridge… Over Troubled Podcast”

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Luke: “I missed my flight a few weeks ago, because I’m a dingus.”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Often say a photo is worth a thousand words, this photo is worth a millions words. And, we’ll lay down at least nine-hundred thousand of them on this here Thursday edition of the show.”

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Luke: “So, uh, we, we sexted a little bit last night.”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke singing “Jeremiah was an Uber driver!” and Andrew saying “Oh, no.”

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Luke and Andrew: “No, he would say ‘Knock the horns off, wipe its butt and send it up.’ Eww, so gross!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Oh, you’re Team Piper. Oh, yeah! I thought we made that clear. Hmm… okay. Interesting. Yeah.”

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Luke and Andrew: “This is my happening, and I’m freaking out! This is your happening, and I’m freaking out.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Trucks, trucks, and more trucks! Tell ’em The Bone sent ya!”

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Clips From TBTL #2087

Andrew: “Anyway…. ignore that.”

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Andrew: Barbershops make Andrew nervous

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Andrew: “Barbershops make me nervous”

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Andrew: “Can I, I, we need, we really need to move on; but, I am going to backtrack so far here, that’s gonna make your head spin.”

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Andrew: “Hey, Luke.”

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Andrew: “Jesus.”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing #2

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Andrew: “Notice me Largent, notice me!”

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Andrew: “Oh, no. Really?”

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Andrew: “That has got me embarrassed.”

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Andrew: Whispering: “Oh my God, this guy.”

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Andrew and Luke: “Do you still have that ‘I’m embarrassed’ drop handy, because I’m embarrassed. ‘This is embarrassing!’ That one? That’s the one.”

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Andrew and Luke: “It’s Confidence (Yeah) By The Foot, gotcha.”

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Andrew and Luke: “You know, what is that one person can wear that and be like ‘This is my style, I own it.’ And then, I go, like, ‘This is my style, I own it. Oww! That hurt.’ Right. Ohhh.”

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Luke: “And, scene.”

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Luke: “At the Burbank Springs Broadcast Center”

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Luke: “Fuck you!!!”

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Luke: “‘God damn, this is Sunkist!’ and they would call their congressperson.”

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Luke: “I can also observe her just leaving some giant, steaming Pod-dog piles.”

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Luke: “I just watched a teenager sneak out of the house!”

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Luke: “I know you like, I know you like.”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Oh my God, like crazy!”

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Luke: “Oh, man!”

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Luke: “Screw you all!!! You’re all corrupt. You make me sick!”

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Luke: “That’s the irony! That’s the irony.”

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Luke: “Welcome to my world.”

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Luke and Andrew: “A new way of living, that I become aware of today, I’m very excited, thanks to Golf Digest Magazine… God, you’re old.”

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Luke and Andrew: “House of Mouse Prexy Ankles Cheese Project. It’s always House of Mouse, it’s always House of Mouse.”

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Luke and Andrew: “I barely have time for you, and I’m a loser! I know, you sent me something with notes.”

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Luke and Andrew: “I’ve, I know what I have done is, I have shamelessly used my wife has a human ordering shield. Oh, no. Really?”

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Luke and Andrew: Role-playing IHOP breakfast scene

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Luke and Andrew: Role-playing Luke ordering a steak at a steakhouse

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Luke and Andrew: “The toast now arrives black and scary, just the way I like. And, probably, with a giant loogie on it, ya asshole. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Okay, let’s just, let’s, let’s take the rhetoric down. Okay, sorry, sorry, sorry.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Time is currency. Jesus.”

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Luke ad Andrew: “Time is currency. Right. Oh my God, this guy.”

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