Marsupial Gurgle

Andrew: “An angel is just a boy that poops in a box”

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Andrew: “And, also, didn’t… didn’t… isn’t there a remix I’m supposed to play of that… I’m not supposed to say his name on the show anymore; but, our, our friend who sends us a lot of audio… didn’t he send us a remix of that; or, I promised to make a remix with you saying ‘Ooh’? Something. I don’t know. What the hell am I talking about? Go on. Tell your story, Luke”

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Andrew: “I don’t have any show titles, Lucas”

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Andrew: “I don’t know what happened”

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Andrew: “I know that I’m taking this… conversation into a place that… you and I can’t explain… So, maybe, I shouldn’t”

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Andrew: “I was #blessed”

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Andrew: “‘I was Walsh-level thrilled'”

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Andrew: Imitating the sound of Luke typing with his mouth full

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Andrew: “Just… before the show, I was rolling in hot dog related music. And, again… think about what my job is, I just spent like an hour listening to songs about hot dogs”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Obviously… that is the platonic ideal of a hot dog cannon. Ain’t nobody on Earth gonna argue with that”

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Andrew: “Somehow, seeing this makes me happy; although, I would never touch them myself”

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Andrew: “We did it!”

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Andrew: “Were you… a guy who ate Planters cheese balls growing up? They came in kind of a… kind of a can, like a tubular can with a, a yellow lid and the, the… the cheese balls inside were, like, perfect spheres, about a size of a marble?”

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Andrew: “What could possibly go wrong?”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew unhelpfully said that Blursday shout-outs happen on Blursday

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Andrew and Luke: French ticking boxes

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Andrew and Luke: “Nobody was cocky about it; but, they were… thorough… Good… and (and)… thorough (thorough)”

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Luke: “But, can we start calling… all messages, ‘Dazzling D-mails’?”

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Luke: “By the way, this is not even having anything to do with the story I meant to tell”

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Luke: Drawn out “What?”

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Luke: “I am just, I am feeling so good, you guys. I am so happy to be back here… for a total of… one day”

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Luke: “I mean, I went into a fugue eating state”

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Luke: “I mean… listen… you do you. YOLO, YODO”

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Luke: “It’s okay if it looks like it’s from the 1500s… Stop trying to paint its bald spot… Just leave it alone”

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Luke: Singing “We’re gonna put on some ketchup… then some mustard… because, we only have one kind of song”

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Luke: “So, anyway, we’ll… tell you about… the latest… example of art restoration… gone amoke”

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Luke: “That’s as much as my feeble brain… four red wines in, could really grasp”

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Luke: “Two bros… baching it up”

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Luke: “What the motherfucking… fuck… is the system here!?”

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Luke: “You know, my fecalist was out of town; so, I could eat anything I wanted”

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Luke: “You poor fool”

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Luke: “You were straight… grubbin’!”

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Luke and Andrew: Fist City and Headbutt Town

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Andrew: “Andrew doesn’t have time for this kind of foolishness right now”

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Andrew: “Damn! That is some… high octane bullshit”

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Andrew: “‘Damn! Why can’t that be me?’ and ‘Damn! Good for you’ and ‘Damn! That is some… high octane bullshit'”

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Andrew: “Hey, man! This feels so weird… Feels weird to just be sitting in a cozy, little studio… looking at birds out my window while I talk to you… I almost forgot, I’ve lost all of my muscle memory of how to do the show from here. I feel like… if today’s gonna be successful, I… have no choice but to walk out on to Roosevelt… put thumb out… and see what happens”

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Andrew: “Hunh!”

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Andrew: “I don’t know why I keep on saying this today”

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Andrew: “I, I… I just wrote the F word… because, I didn’t have any other feelings”

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Andrew: “I, I’m not even gonna lie to you, Luke… I’m, I swear to God, this is… little bit of real talk”

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Andrew: “Oh, no!”

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Andrew: “Sounds good”

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Andrew: “That’s really effed up!”

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Andrew: “This is gonna sound really lame after what you were talking about”

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Andrew: “This is just… too beautiful to eat”

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Andrew: “Uhhh! I don’t wanna talk about this. I just wanna drive the truck!”

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Andrew: “We have some gas behind us”

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Andrew: “What the hell is going down there in Monee, Illinois?”

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Andrew: “You have five fingers. You don’t wanna… cut any of them off”

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Andrew and Luke: “Does he go by ‘Daddy’? (… ‘Papa’) Ahh! No he doesn’t, Andrew!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Ouch!!! (It’s like, ‘Aw, shit!’)”

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Luke: “And… it… friggin’… hurt!”

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Luke: “As soon as you hit that gas, as soon as you go… you take that brake foot, you put it in the glove box”

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Luke: “Commit… commit, commit”

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Luke: Cute laugh

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Luke: “Full of gas… homies”

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Luke: “I am scared of more things at forty-two than I was when I was at nine or ten”

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Luke: “I am still living life on the highway. I am… on my way home, finally… Although, I just found out that my flight is delayed… so, I may not make my connection… So, home… may be… the food court at Sea-Tac Airport in Seattle”

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Luke: “I did do that one… bitchin’ jump where I rolled over; so, like, my cred is still pretty good”

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Luke: “I did the jump… I rolled, we have good footage… I’m done”

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Luke: “I had a sort of a critical moment in my life yesterday… where, I had to decide between being afraid of something… and, just… doing it… and, I chose… to be sort of afraid of something… and, that something was… jumping off of a huge ramp in a monster truck”

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Luke: “I might just start traveling… with a gigantic-ass backpack”

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Luke: “I was weirdly geeked out”

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Luke: “Oh… shit! We just killed this guy from CBS”

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Luke: “Okay. Mission accomplished”

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Luke: “Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh! Oh no, oh no!”

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Luke: “Really!?”

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Luke: Singing “TBTE!”

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Luke: “Sorry if this story is boring and taking too long”

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Luke: “Stu, are you at the river yet?”

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Luke: “They’ve never heard of TBTL… Who told you that… Get outta here… Please do not associate… that program with our program”

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Luke: “This has been… Top Stories”

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Luke: “This thing is loose… but, I think you can get one more jump out if it. And… then…”

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Luke: “Time to lean? Time to clean”

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Luke: “We will be right back here tomorrow. I will be coming to you from Burbank Springs. Lord willing and the creeks don’t rise”

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Luke: “Womp, womp”

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Luke: “You’re easy-breezy about Tunisi [sic]“

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Luke and Andrew: Luke needs to go use a bathroom and is asking Andrew if he should walking into a Super 8 in which there is police activity going on and ask to use the bathroom

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Luke and Andrew: Luke saying “It’s like that time I was driving the monster truck, Andrew” and both having a good laugh

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Luke and Andrew: “That whole twenty-four hour show was kind of a blur… Yeah, everything I’ve said on this show… since I started in 2012 is a blur”

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Andrew: “Again, kind of out of my snoopiness”

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Andrew: “Ah, I don’t, I don’t follow those bozos. I don’t follow politics. It’s all a bunch of bullshit”

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Andrew: “Ahh… America’s too litigious! That’s bullshit!”

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Andrew: “Big, honking sandwich”

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Andrew: “Damnit. Why did I order that?”

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Andrew: “For some reason… I always just feel like I’ve been caught doing something when somebody at American Public Media acknowledges that we exist. That’s not healthy”

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Andrew: “Go screw yourself”

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Andrew: “Hey, Lurnk and Yandy”

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Andrew: “How dare you put that song back in my head?”

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Andrew: “I didn’t wanna go out there, under the baking sun, feeling just bloated and gross… but, nonetheless… I persisted”

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Andrew: “I have Bluetoothed my way into the Sonata’s stereo”

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Andrew: “I’m sitting here like a… fat, happy hog right now in the passenger seat of a Sonata”

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Andrew: “I’ve got this huge plate now of a sandwich… french fries; cuz, they didn’t confiscate my french fries… out of my cold, dead hand, Hop Cat!”

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Andrew: “Is it even a hot dog anymore?”

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Andrew: “It’s a little bit of a, just a, snoopy thing”

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Andrew: “It’s a weird thing that makes no sense at all!”

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Andrew: “Nobody answered the question about duct taped hot dogs; which is bullshit reporting… It’s bunk journalism, man”

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Andrew: “Of course, I would eat that damn hot dog!”

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Andrew: “Oh, God. I ate too much”

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Andrew: “Oh, no!”

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Andrew: Singing “TBTL”

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Andrew: “So, you know what the implications of that is… are… What the implications of that are… Implications are plural”

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Andrew: “Unlike me, I actually did leave a little bit of the sandwich behind too… Sorry, sandwich”

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Andrew: “What does this mean for the future of the hot dog cannon?”

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Andrew: “What is the point of a hot dog cannon… if you’re just shooting… bullets of essentially duct tape. Makes no sense”

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Andrew: “Whoa!”

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Andrew: “Yeah, it’s like Fifty-two Pickup… Go screw yourself”

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Andrew: “You know, her life could be… could not be less like mine… Huh? I probably said that wrong. You follow… It’s bene a long week, man. My brain is not, my brain is not working well. We were also up very late last night; so… I apologize for not making tons of sense”

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Andrew: “You know, some people are just bullshitters, right?”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew is relieved to be in a rental car and hopes the listeners aren’t mad

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew singing “TBTL” and Luke laughing

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Andrew and Luke: “Hey, there. It’s a Hyundai Sonata, I believe. Oh, Kia… Kia, Hyundai… tomayto, tomahto [ph]“

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Andrew and Luke: “I am gonna hold my microphone to the speaker of the car and play these off of my phone; and… I’m sure it will just go fabulously… Oh, yeah. I can’t see how this will ever go wrong”

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Andrew and Luke: “Just be cool man. This is gonna be a long drive, dude”

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Andrew and Luke: Saying “Yeah! Yeah” as Adam Duritz

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Andrew and Luke: “Should we make a pact that, if we pass a hitchhiker between here and our destination of Columbus, Mississippi… to be true to the spirit of this, we have to pick up the hitchhiker? No, flipping way! Are you out of your mind? No!”

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Andrew and Luke: “They was trying to say that I was drunk. I only had eight beers! Try was trying to say I activated this lady’s asymptomatic… arthritis… I only had two knee surgeries!”

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Andrew and Luke: “You know, we were saying we were gonna get there by hook or by crook; and, it turned out, it was more like… by Hertz… or by crook… That was terrible. I can’t believe… He just made that joke”

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