Category: Audio Clips

Andrew: “A cat suddenly comes tearing out of the cat shit closet”

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Andrew: “Alright, we’ll we lost, Chris. See ya at 30 Rock.”

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Andrew: “Aww, Theo, you’re getting to be old”

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Andrew: “Because, every time we say this, our buddy Linh Pham ends up buying it; and, I don’t want him to go broke.”

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Andrew: “But, goddamn it! I hate those words!”

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Andrew: “But, it’s damn near me!”

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Andrew: “Bye”

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Andrew: “Coin-kee-dinkily [ph]“

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Andrew: “Come on!”

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Andrew: Cute Laugh

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Andrew: Flat “Oh. Wow. Really”

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Andrew: Flat “What?”

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Andrew: “God…damn!!”

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Andrew: “Hey, have we already done this one?”

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Andrew: “I don’t know how to end it”

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Andrew: “I mean, that might be our last show. They might just fire us.”

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Andrew: “I think that’s it!!!”

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Andrew: “I’m gonna say this with all due respect, Luke… But, I hate your story. It’s an ugly story.”

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Andrew: “I’m sorry, my brain is wondering a little. I agree with everything you just said.”

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Andrew: “Las Vegas Card Sharks?”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “Oh, God!”

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “Sorry”

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “You jerk!”

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Andrew: Laughing, saying “It feels good to la…” and fake gasping for air

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Andrew: “Luke, say something now! I’m out! I started, I started… on a, on a sentence that I can’t finish”

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Andrew: “Nope”

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Andrew: “Oh, no”

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Andrew: “Oh, no” #2

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Andrew: “And then, the last thing you do is get down on your damn hands and knees and you scrub the floor”

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Andrew: “God, let me get it out!”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing #2

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Andrew: Laughing #3

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Andrew: “No, make them play, so that I can line my pockets!”

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Andrew: “Okay, on a scale of one butt to ten butts, how butt-hurt are you that you didn’t get the call? How much is this about that?”

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Andrew: Saying “And it is amazing!” in a sing-songy manner

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Andrew: “That would have been funnier if I didn’t laugh my ass off throughout the whole thing”

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Andrew: “The early bird… I guess got the worm; but, the late bird also got the worm in this case”

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Andrew: “We sent them to each other via e-mails, like… two ships passing in the digital night”

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Andrew: “You’re already giggling. What are you giggling about?”

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Andrew and Luke: “Today’s like Tuesday, right? (I) think.”

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Luke: “And, I’ll probably quietly burp off microphone”

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Luke: “Apparently” (edited to remove audio glitch)

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Luke: “I shit you not”

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Luke: “It’s gonna be an action-packed hour, my friendos”

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Luke: “It’s just a hot mess”

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Luke: “Oh, man. We got a new segment… called ‘360 Spins and Slam Dunk Pointers'”

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Luke: “Oui, Oui”

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Luke: “They call it, ‘TBTL Story Town'”

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Andrew: “And, also, I’m not hugging you anymore.”

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Andrew: “Because, you don’t wanna be opening your mouth in poop air”

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Andrew: Bleeping Luke

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Andrew: “But, that’s part of the process, man”

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Andrew: “Holy… criminy! Have they frickin’… Sorry, what other fake swear words…?”

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Andrew: “I don’t even wanna know”

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Andrew: “I got it in an e-mail from Linh Pham over at Marsupial Gurgle. He wants to host it on his site”

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Andrew: “I was trying to Burbank a joke with her”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Nah, I’m making that part up. That’s fake news.”

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Andrew: “Oh, God, no!!”

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Andrew: “Oh, yeah! Getting my health grind on!”

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Andrew: “Ooh, my!”

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: Snorting #2

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Andrew: “That, that, that doesn’t work for me, Luke.”

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Andrew: “That’s pretty good”

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Andrew: “That’s where I store a lot of my data, by the way… in the poop cloud.”

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Andrew: “You just broke my brain”

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Andrew: “You just broke my brain; and now, I’ll only see you as a biome.”

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Andrew and Luke: “‘Give us the jersey, Brady!’ That was the worst! I knew it was gonna be bad. Do you even know what I was trying? I think that was your attempt to do an impression of a Nihilist. It was!”

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Andrew and Luke: “It might be a two foot day. It might (Right) be a ten foot day… my friends. It might (Yeah) be a fifteen foot day. You don’t know what’s happening, and you’re in a park. You’re in a park!”

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Luke: “But, there’s nothing micro about my biome, bud. Gotta tell ya.”

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Luke: “Can I be the hashtag?”

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Luke: Chuckling

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Luke: “Hey, by the way, listener, what you don’t know is that was a fucking funny joke I told, that Andrew just bleeped out. Because, he didn’t want you to realize how funny I actually am.”

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Luke: “I’m pausing and I’m talking even more awkwardly than normal here at the top of the show; because… I have a case of the hiccups”

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Luke: Laughing and saying “I thought you were trying to sing the Friday TBTL jingle”

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Luke: “Maybe the, the fear, the terror of trying to host this imaginary radio show with the hiccups actually… did the trick. I appear to be… healed.”

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Luke: Snorting

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Luke: “This guy doesn’t wash his hands!!”

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Luke: Tip of the Cap, T-Rex or Hashtag

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Luke: “We coo'”

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Luke: “When you’re doing improv… at the old folks’ home, the answer is always [bleeped]“

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Luke: “Who the fuck do you think you are?”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke doesn’t want Andrew to break his heart with dazzling deets that are fake deets

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Luke and Andrew: Luke saying “Wait for it” and Andrew laughing once music picks back up

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Luke and Andrew: “You gonna bleep that out too? Bleep, just… This’s all been one big bleep.”

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Andrew: “And, I need you to explain the joke to me now”

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Andrew: “I should’ve pulled the damn audio”

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Andrew: “I was telling Vieves, like I used to fuck with cicadas; but, now cicadas keep me up. So, I keep all the bugs outta there.”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Let’s just do a segment called, ‘Andrew didn’t get the joke'”

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Andrew: “Really?”

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Andrew: “Really!?”

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Andrew: Singing “I wanna Shauf!”

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew and Luke: “I usually have, like, a light rain and, sometimes, a medium rain going on at the same time. But, never a hard rain, ironically. Ironically, never a hard rain, never a real rain.”

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Andrew and Luke: “Oh, no!! That’s not TBTL appropriate! You asked, I answered!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Wait, do you want to switch it? Do you want me to be you? No.”

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Luke: “Back at it again with the white snow”

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Luke: “Cray complex”

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Luke: “E-mails and e-mails”

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Luke: “Friday… Friday. Gotta get down for Friday”

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Luke: “Gettin’ loose!”

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Luke: “He’s a young!”

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Luke: “I love your story… Missoula. It’s a beautiful story”

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Luke: “Makes me want to Shauf”

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Luke: “Senior Bidet Producer Chris Hayes”

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Luke: “The scales have fallen from my eyes, people”

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Luke: Trying to laugh like Muttley

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Luke: “Well, it’s, it’s raining rain here in Portland”

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Luke: “You paint your balding helmet?”

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Luke and Andrew: ASMR Talking

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Luke and Andrew: “But, this time… you gotta really enjoy this joke …Okay”

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Luke and Andrew: “I’m glad that we got a dazzling detail instead of a deadening detail (Yes) in today (Yeah)”

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Luke and Andrew: New Podcast: Joke Exploder

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Luke and Andrew: “So tempted to just (No, just don’t) Groundhog Day the shit out of this”

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Andrew: “Blerk!”

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Andrew: “Club Luke: Where all the people who are lacking a blue checkmark are having more fun… than anybody else.”

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Andrew: “I don’t think a lot of my fellow members are down with the RSS podcasting game”

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Andrew: “I just don’t care”

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Andrew: “I’m forty. Embrace it.”

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Andrew: “I’m in it to win it, my friend”

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Andrew: “Is the capitalization all junked up too?”

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Andrew: “It does seem like somebody just, like, had two seconds… to just, like, shit this tweet out as fast as possible”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “No, I’m not!!!”

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Andrew: “Not to brag; but, I did my research. I read a BuzzFeed article about how dirty that song is.”

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Andrew: “Screw you”

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Andrew: “This was a rough show for Old Uncle Andy”

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Andrew: “Wha’ happen?”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew chuckling and Luke saying “Ha!”

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Andrew and Luke: Happy and Unhappy

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Andrew and Luke: Luke is a purist when it comes to re-creating drops

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Luke: “Although, I do have a new possible show title: Waggle Pulse”

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Luke: “And you had one chance to blow, and you did not want to miss it. Spaghetti. Spaghetti. Spaghetti.”

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Luke: “Andrew and I are in good company; or, is it Bad Company? Or, is it Bachman-Turner Overdrive?”

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Luke: “Don’t… look!”

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Luke: “Dozens!!!”

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Luke: “Ha!”

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Luke: “I am clothed, by the way. Calm down everybody. I am wearing clothes.”

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Luke: “I’d probably be napping right now; which… hold your applause at that thought, everybody. I know some of you would vote for that”

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Luke: “Leave no detail undeadened”

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Luke: Singing “Let The Eagle Soar”

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Luke: Singing “You better work”

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Luke: Snickering

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Luke: “Sometimes… when we touch the weather here in the Northwest, the honesty is too much”

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Luke: “Which is it, bruh?”

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Luke and Andrew: “I loved that contrast. It was beautiful contrast. I loved that contrast. I loved your juxtaposition.”

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Luke and Andrew: “It should be specified, uh, clarified? Mentioned? Cauterized? Cauterized is the word (Collateralized?) you’re looking for. It’s cauter-comma-ized.”

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Luke and Andrew: Laughing

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Luke and Andrew: “Really?!? Yes!”

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Luke and Andrew: Sound effect needed for baffling or deadening deets

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