Audio Clips – Page 297 – Marsupial Gurgle

Andrew and Luke: “What if I had a card, when it opened, it was your voice saying all those things to Genevieve? Would that… Well, you just recorded me talking.”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Let me just open source this if I can. Let me crowdsource this, let me Ten-source it.”

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Luke: Making a creaking sound

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Luke: “Mission… accomplished!”

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Luke: “Much like… pleasing your woman on Valentine’s Day. I know it’s not a thing you go in for.”

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Luke: “Previously… on TBTL”

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Luke: “There’s gonna be so much jibber-jabber today”

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Luke: “We’d like to thank our Todd Rundgren, Bang on the Drum, BandagesForMore.com level donors of the day”

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Luke: Yelling “Boy, do we have problems, Newark!!!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Andrew has a heart of stone, (Yeah) and lungs full of dust”

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Luke and Andrew: Doing tomorrow’s show titles today

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Luke and Andrew: “Fuzz gaze, fuzz shoe (Fuzz!)”

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Luke and Andrew: “Have you been cut? Are you bleeding? Bandages for Less. Also, Bandages for More.”

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Luke and Andrew: “If I was up at Chubby and Tubby, on Aurora, buying some Violet Crumble… Lot of dirty stuff in that sentence, by the way.”

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Luke and Andrew: “It’s immaterial. It’s immaterial.”

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Luke and Andrew: Laughing

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Luke and Andrew: Luke channels his inner Nina Totenberg and Andrew cracks up

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Luke and Andrew: “Oof… Oof, this could get me in trouble (Oof)”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2315

February 13, 2017 February 13, 2017

Andrew: “Anywhoozle”

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Andrew: Chuckling

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Andrew: Funny Laugh

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Andrew: Funny Vocalization

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Andrew: “Hello, Luke!”

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Andrew: “I feel like you’re being a little bit insulting here; like, I know the difference between a boat and Crocodile Mile.”

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Andrew: “I mean, it’s less scandalous than it sounds, I think!”

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Andrew: “I shoulda brought a banana”

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Andrew: “I was such a loser and I just only remember myself being awkward and… and, kind of, just like small ‘A’ unattract… No, small ‘U’ unattractive, all the time”

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Andrew: “It was supposed to be the one that started with a ‘T’; but, it ended up being the one that started with a ‘C’.”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing #2

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Andrew: Laughing #3

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Andrew: “Like, that’s a dazzling detail that I seem to remember”

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Andrew: “Oh, God, it’s good to be back!”

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Andrew: “Oh. What? What?”

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Andrew: “Read a fucking book”

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Andrew: “Really!?”

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Andrew: Saying “DJ Burbank!” in a deep, gruff voice

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Andrew: “Thought that would go on forever. I loved it!”

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Andrew: “W-W-W dot dah-duh-dah-da!”

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Andrew: “What’s wrong with you, boy?”

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Andrew: “You, you probably gained a lot of listeners while I was out. You’re probably losing a lot of listeners as I speak.”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew laughing and Luke saying “I’m trying to figure out, like, ‘Is a thing happening here, or not? What’s going on?'”

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Andrew and Luke: “Luke! I just typed in ‘Why did’ into Google… (Oh, no!) and it said, and the first suggestion is, ‘Why did Adele start over?'”

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Andrew and Luke: Real Time with Andrew Walsh or Hot Take Time Machine

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Andrew and Luke: Three-hour adventure, not a three-hour tour

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Andrew and Luke: “Yes!! Like a boat, (Okay) Luke, a boat! (Yeah, okay)”

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“Damn, Fireball, back at it again with the white Vans!”

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Luke: “And, I just had to, like, I had to just sort of astrally project out of my body. I had to, somehow, override the pain in my hand”

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Luke: “Another notch in the old bedpost; but, there’s no bedpost because the bed’s on the ground!”

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Luke: “But… damn, it’s good to have you back, buddy!”

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Luke: “C-C-C-C-Cookie School! (??)“

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Luke: Chuckling

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Luke: “Goddamn it!!”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Let’s get at that head”

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Luke: “Oh my goodness gracious, people. Is it a Monday already?”

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Luke: “Oh, did I do that?”

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Luke: “Read a book!!”

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Luke: “She’s really grown up, you guys! They grow up so fast!”

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Luke: Singing “You read my mind, girl I wanna shake you down. I can give you all the lovin’ you need” and mimicking key/tempo change

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Luke: “Sitchy-ation [ph]“

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Luke: Stretched out “Wow!”

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Luke: “They would be our… Todd Rundgren, I don’t wanna work, I just want to bang on the drum all day, level donors of the day”

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Luke: “What!?!”

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Luke: “Wow!”

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Luke: “Yo no hablo inglés”

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Luke: “You’re fine!”

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Luke and Andrew: “And then, the second thing that comes up is, ‘Why did Andrew miss that chance to pork his driver’s ed teacher?’ The other question is, ‘What’s wrong with you, boy?'”

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Luke and Andrew: Andrew drops the deut that his driving instructor took Andrew to her apartment

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Luke and Andrew: “I don’t like it. I don’t really like it either.”

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Luke and Andrew: “I have one other very important question; and, by very important question, I mean… nobody cares about this but me. (Uh-huh) When did you get home?”

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Luke and Andrew: “I would stroll in, I would make my way to the bathroom. Once you’ve peed, what are they going to do, put the pee back inside you!? Joke’s on them! Sorry, nobody… I need to keep talking so that nobody pictures that; cuz, that’s where my brain’s going. What kind of contraption…?”

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Luke and Andrew: “That’s a whole other thing. I mean, I think we can agree… She didn’t wanna work, she just wanted to bang on the Walsh all day (Oh, no!)”

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Luke and Andrew: “What did she pick up? (…I honestly) I have no… her diaphragm. No, I have no idea… I have…”

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Luke and Andrew: “Yo no hablo Dundee (Yeah)”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2314

February 11, 2017 February 11, 2017

After the show ended, Luke inserted a discussion that Luke and Camaro Kev had about Kev’s McDonald’s lunch. Luke used that bit to adjust the recording levels.

Luke and Camaro Kev: McDonald’s Lunch Talk

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Camaro Kev: “I am just tired of get–being known as the ‘Poop Podcast’. This is just getting ridiculous.”

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Camaro Kev: “I hate this song so much. I hate this song so much.”

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Camaro Kev and Luke: Camaro Kev laughing and Luke saying “How amazing is that!?”

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Luke: “A little warning, a little trigger warning at the top of the show”

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Luke: “And then, speaking of number twos”

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Luke: “Bunghole”

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Luke: “Daddy, what is kick-puncher?”

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Luke: “Goddamn Ruskis!”

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Luke: “I gotta fuck with that spicy mustard”

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Luke: “I think that is, like, the dog’s… you know, bunghole, is being dragged across the floor or carpet. It disgusts me!”

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Luke: “I’m just gonna swear at will; because, there’s gonna be a lot of swearing later on the show. So, I need to warm people up to it.”

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Luke: “I’ve been really into these, like, getting into these shows where it’s like, you don’t know what the fuck is happening for the first, like, nine episodes. And, you’re just like, ‘What!? How are they gonna make this all work?'”

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Luke: “It kept going and going and going and going and going and going”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: Singing “Love Lyft (lift) us up where we belong”

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Luke: Sipping on some bubble water and chasing it with some hot coffee

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Luke: “Take a moment to thank our… our Todd Rundgren, Bang on the Drum All Day level donors”

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Luke: “That’s right. My new favorite insult is ‘shit-gibbon'”

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Luke: “The kids love the Reddit!”

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Luke: “Welcome to Trump’s America!”

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Luke: “You can take the boy out of the Cuyahoga River; but, you can’t take the sausage fan out of… What? I don’t know, this is breaking down.”

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Luke and Camaro Kev: “Oh my God, I turned the (Woife!) volume down. I killed it. (Woife!)”

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Luke and Camaro Kev: “Something is arriving. Something is arriving (Something is arrivingk)”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2313

February 11, 2017 February 11, 2017

With Sean DeTore back on the show, this time as a guest co-host, Luke went into his iTunes and searched for clips or segments tagged with Sean’s name to play on the show. The following are the clips that were played.

Sean DeTore: Intelligence For Your Life clip

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Sean DeTore: Sean British Edit 2 Part 1

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Sean DeTore: Sean British Edit 2 Part 2

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Sean DeTore: Sean Rapping to His Own Beat clip

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Luke: “Alright, Seanie, go. You need to leave… my friend.”

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Luke: “I have the worst eBay name of all time, it’s ‘WheelerDealer2000′”

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Luke: “It was a real… west side of the control room, east side of the control room beef”

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Luke: “It was all snowy and… beautiful for the last few days; and, now, the rain is coming down and the snow is just turning to a… soupy pile of sadness.”

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Luke: “Oh, man”

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Luke: Pod-dog was out looking for cat poop and got rained on

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Luke: Saying “These look… like… good hands!” as Rock Biter from The Neverending Story

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Luke: Saying “Zat’s a good gyro!” with a faux-Italian accent

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Luke: “Yes, indeedy. Doddly-doo.”

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Luke and Sean DeTore: “Alright, Sean, we’re losing you in ten minutes… if I have (Yeah, yeah) my timing correct. Ten, ten, ten to thirteen… Ten to thirteen.”

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Luke and Sean DeTore: “Well, here’s the thing, Sean. Ever since you stopped being the engineer on this show, the audio quality has just gone straight to hell. Wow. And, it wasn’t that great to start with.”

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Sean DeTore: “Boy, these pancakes sure are the bee’s knees!”

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Sean DeTore: “I actually took it to a shop, they gave me an estimate of six hundo, and I was like, ‘No way'”

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Sean DeTore: “Oh, you know, it’s pretty great. I, I’m on the air and I’m getting paid nothing; so… it’s kind of like making a podcast, I think… in a way.”

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Sean DeTore: Saying “I live in Topsham!” with a faux-British accent

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Sean DeTore: Singing “Everything’s great!”

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Sean DeTore: Singing “From a long time ago”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2312

February 8, 2017 February 8, 2017

Luke: “A lot of you are like, ‘Why am I still listening to this nightmare?'”

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Luke: “Ahh, you never let me down, Toyota 4Runner, with two hundred and fifty thousand miles on ya.”

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Luke: “And, I’m a little worried…. that I might… just end up joining the athletic club; because, I’m, I’m very easily persuaded into things like this.”

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Luke: “And, pump some iron, and just get completely jacked, working on my beef castle”

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Luke: “Because, your friend, Luke Burbank, is a terrible human”

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Luke: “BTDubs”

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Luke: “Burbank!”

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Luke: “Don’t tell me this show isn’t getting its frigging Science Friday on! Move over, Ira Flatow!”

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Luke: “Don’t tell me this show isn’t getting its frigging Science Friday on! Move over, Ira Flatow! There’s a new podcart in town.”

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Luke: Driving with one hand on the steering wheel and one hand holding a microphone

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Luke: “Got it, thank you. ‘kay thanks, bye.”

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Luke: “Hey, dum-dums”

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Luke: “Hey, man! Uhh, I need to order fifty more stats…. stat!”

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Luke: “I am trying to regain control. I do not currently have it. I am actually almost getting into a crash. Oh, my dear Lord. I got control of the car again.”

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Luke: “I gotta thank our… Clash… Train in Vain level donors of the day”

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Luke: “I know it was a weird show. It was fun for me… and, that’s the important part.”

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Luke: “I know that some of you are saying, ‘Burbank… why are you in a car, driving around, by yourself, no sidekick, no Andrew, no woife… No anybody else. Just you and a questionable set of errands.'”

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Luke: “I’m gonna give this a solid three-and-a-half stars… for existing!”

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Luke: Little Blingy Devil

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Luke: “Oh shit, there’s a cop”

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Luke: “Oh, yes! The perfect crime, ladies and gentlemen. That’s right, got the tour of the health club. Got use of the treadmill. They do have a tanning booth.”

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Luke: “Oh… my gosh, you guys”

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Luke: “Okay. Now… your work here is done, lady.”

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Luke: “Ooh, that’s a hot take, Jerome. Hot, hot take on a cold, cold day.”

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Luke: “Rogue kids… sledding all over the place. It’s ridiculous.”

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Luke: “Siri, this is my show today! No sidekick, remember? It’s just me, in the car, almost crashing. That’s what this is, okay? Quit trying to steal my spotlight!”

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Luke: “That… guy is… loving his life right now”

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Luke: “This car has four-wheel drive, people! This car has four-wheel drive… but, guess what? I don’t know how to activate it.”

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Luke: Waiting for Garbage-dot

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Luke: “What the hell was I talking about? Something important.”

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Luke: Whispering “I didn’t tell that’s cuz I was checking out the tanning bed at the gym. I also don’t know why I’m whispering, cuz I’m just by myself in this car.”

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Luke: Whispering “Oh, my God in Heaven”

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Luke: “Yo… Mr. Miyagi”

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Luke: “You know what? I just realized how ridiculous what I was about to say is. I’d like to retract what I’m about to say, before I say it.”

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Luke: “You know what? Yap up, Siri! Yap up right now.”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2311

February 7, 2017 February 7, 2017

Alex Falcone: “It’s so hard to sit there, like, arms crossed like ‘I hate how much he’s having right now'”

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Alex Falcone: “That’s the thing about a staff member, is that they’re, they’re not a person; so, you don’t have to be embarrassed in front of them.”

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Alex Falcone: “Yeah, chill out… Dyson! I need these hands after you’re done with them.”

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Alex Falcone and Luke: Alex asks Luke if he ever gets bored with himself halfway through telling a story on TBTL

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Alex Falcone and Luke: “It’s thirty-nine minutes after the hour, you’re listening to Luke Burbank (That’s right) tell a story he’s told before”

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Alex Falcone and Luke: “So, I have a theory. Okay, good… cuz, I don’t. I don’t think, I don’t think this is true.”

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Andrew Walsh: Singing “Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na… Sock Club!”

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Luke: “And, we will dazzle you with some of the deets!”

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Luke: “For somebody who regularly talks about almost pooping their pants on this show, I have a huge amount of shame surrounding going number two.”

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Luke: “I mean, I don’t wanna, I don’t wanna Monday morning quarterback Zack’s food decisions; but, it’s your wedding. I would go, I would, I would swerve on the uncooked shellfish just as a safety measure.”

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Luke: “I’m extremely good with all of the prep and none of the follow-through”

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Luke: “In your Face… book… Messenger!”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Mr. Weird Alan was my father. Call me Weird Alan.”

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Luke: “Today, we’re calling them our… Clash, Train in Vain, level donors of the day”

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Luke: “You are blowing up on so many fronts, Falcone!”