Marsupial Gurgle

Andrew: “Anywhere fun goes, Fungo goes”

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Andrew: Dictating a text message to Luke

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Andrew: Dictating a text message to Luke #2

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Andrew: “Genevieve was not proud of me that day!”

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Andrew: “How do you like your sax? I usually like mine… kinda yakity”

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Andrew: “I blissed out on this press release”

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Andrew: “I hate getting outta bed!”

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Andrew: “I’m ready!”

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Andrew: “Is everybody on Burbank time in LA, ironically?”

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Andrew: “My priorities are so screwed up in the morning”

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Andrew: “Open parentheses… [sic] I’m ready! Close parentheses [sic]“

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Andrew: “Siri, leave the studio, please”

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Andrew: “That’s where Genevieve is like, ‘You have a weird problem'”

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Andrew: “Well, then, maybe, you’ll suck me into it as well”

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Andrew: “Wet, naked and I just spin around. I just spin, spin, spin ’til I dry”

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Andrew: “You tried to see me naked. Just admit it… Just admit it! That’s what… was going on”

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Andrew and Luke: Fungo and Slider, Traveling Wilburys and Willie Nelson being four Jeff Lynnes old

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Andrew and Luke: “It’s not an embarrassment and it’s not selfish to wish yourself… a… happy Blursday. It’s called ‘Self-Blurs’… Wait a minute. Was that what you were doing before I got here!? A lot… of things are falling into place now”

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Andrew and Luke: “Look at you holding off the mic. This is what it looks like when Luke wants something in the clear… He backed away from the mic… and literally bit the heel of his hand… so that he would not interrupt that great drop. This is what it sounds like when drops cry”

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Andrew and Luke: “Phelps, Phelps and more Phelps! (That’s right)”

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Andrew and Luke: “Well, I also just find you emotionally exhausting. I’m not gonna respond to all of your texts. Well, that’s, that’s fair”

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Luke: “Don’t… eff with the referees!”

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Luke: “Get weird!”

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Luke: “I definitely know how you’re being introduced on the show, going forward… He’s ferociously funny, he’s the sultan of silly… He’s the longest running co-bro of the show”

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Luke: “I would text you if you existed”

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Luke: “Is the Burbank brand… so strongly… established?”

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Luke: “Meow meow”

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Luke: Saying “Why is everybody so mean here?” in a funny manner

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Luke: “The New Hampshires You-Can’t-Get-There-From-Heres”

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Luke: “This is what it sounds like when drops cry”

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Luke: Using Siri to dictate a text message to Andrew

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Luke: Using Siri to dictate a text message to Andrew #2

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Luke: “What a fun, saxy time for you”

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Luke: “You just do what you have to do, when you have to do it”

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Luke and Andrew: “I forgot how much sax there was (There’s a lot of sax in here!)”

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Luke and Andrew: “Was that when you learned you’re a furry, you’re a furry? (I think that’s when the rumor started!)”

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Andrew: “Am I prudish?”

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Andrew: “Boneton Abbey”

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Andrew: “Bring it, listener! Bring it!”

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Andrew: “Cuz, I have a very interesting thing going on with me right now”

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Andrew: “Dirtbag Andy. Project Dirtbag Andy”

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Andrew: “Doot-doot-doot-doot-doot!”

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Andrew: “Fine! Like, I have nothing to say about this”

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Andrew: “Hey, strange face”

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Andrew: “I have had baseball on my brain, like, crazy lately”

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Andrew: “I really should not be doing this on TBTL”

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Andrew: “I… have a confession to make, to both you, Luke, and the listeners”

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Andrew: “I’m not gonna be shooting a BB-gun… in the park”

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Andrew: “I’m not in this… kitchen game to get through it faster”

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Andrew: “It taints… that drop a little bit for me. Let’s move on!!”

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Andrew: “Lemme just get it all out at once”

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Andrew: Saying “That… is… good… news… We… beat… them” while dinging his bell for each word

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Andrew: “So, let’s have some fun out there”

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Andrew: “This is a whole new world for me”

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Andrew: “This literally doesn’t matter, Andrew. Like, you’re almost overthinking it”

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Andrew: “Tracy! Cars! Go!”

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Andrew: “Yep… that’s about what it deserved”

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Andrew: “You could’ve swapped out your banana drop with this”

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Andrew: “You’re a soup boy”

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Andrew and Luke: “I cannot believe this is the conversation… that we’re blowing, like… so far past the break for… like, I just have all of the things… Really? You can’t? Have you heard the show? Have you been on the show for… three thousand episodes? Oh my God!”

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Luke: “Carbonhondrates? [ph]“

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Luke: “Cool… that’s basically the space I’m now playing in”

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Luke: “Cool… that’s basically the space I’m now playing in” (Edited)

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Luke: “Everybody is crazy for the Insta’pot”

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Luke: “I’m, I’m a soup man. I don’t care who hears it, Andrew. I don’t care who knows it. I’m into this”

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Luke: “I’m… fed up with this! I just can’t take it anymore!”

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Luke: “It doesn’t make any sense. It’s just… my crazy brain”

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Luke: “Lord knows, I’m not trying to be judgy about this stuff”

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Luke: “Mister Steal Your Phone is here!”

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Luke: Saying “Maybe try a different fruit next time?” in a robotic manner

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Luke: “That… is a pretty… good… spoof”

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Luke: “There’s just… gonna be a lotta squatting”

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Luke: “When I say you don’t miss a sausage fest, of course, I mean… anywhere there are cased meats… there, also, will be Walsh… in their midst. I don’t mean that, I did not mean”

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Luke: “Wow! Wow! All I can say is, ‘Wow!'”

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Luke and Andrew: “Cuz, it’s been almost forty seconds since (Mmm-hmm) we were talking about me”

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Luke and Andrew: “They seem indulgent to me… Indulgent!?! A little bit!?”

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Andrew: “I call it the ‘supposebly syndrome'”

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Andrew: “I don’t give a care!”

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Andrew: “I don’t have anything good to say today”

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Andrew: “I don’t wanna say, ‘Mandalorian’. I only wanna say, ‘Mandadorian'”

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Andrew: “I had no idea so many Mary Louise Kelly jokes would be in today’s show! I would’ve gotten up early if I had known this was in store”

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Andrew: “I swore at myself; I vacuumed it up”

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Andrew: “Oh, this is explicit”

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Andrew: “Some sort of trashy… Martin Luther… of… 2020”

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Andrew: “That’s what gets you cancelled”

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Andrew: “That’s what I said!!”

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Andrew: “The, the golden age of the Marsupial Gurgle”

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Andrew: “This is how Libertarians are born”

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Andrew: “This is so gross”

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Andrew: “You know your body better than I know your body, sadly”

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Luke: “Cuz, there are a lot of other reasons I am cancellable; and… a lot of other problematic things about me. I didn’t think the garbage thing was gonna be the one”

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Luke: “I don’t think I’m gonna take this anymore”

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Luke: “I killed a lotta worms in my childhood… as… part of the fishing industrial complex”

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Luke: “I’m doing it”

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Luke: “I’m in a really weird mood today”

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Luke: “Luke, I am your father!”

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Luke: “You know… mono-syllabic, bi-syllabic… you know… First name, last name. Pretty easy”

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Luke and Andrew: “I… self-pwned myself so hard (Yeah); and, it was good”

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Andrew: “Delete it”

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Andrew: “Don’t go playing in traffic, Luke”

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Andrew: “Flip it and reverse it”

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Andrew: “I can’t drive ninety-five”

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Andrew: “I should not be listening to this conversation at all”

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Andrew: “I’m obsessed with this song”

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Andrew: “What are you doing, Chad?”

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Andrew: “When I’m on those machines… if you’re walking in front of me, I got nothing to stare at. I’m staring at you. Like, I’m gonna watch you walk from one end to the other”

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Andrew and Luke: “I have found myself getting into bad habits of not wanting to leave the house; and… Actually, not to turn this about me; but… Along with having strong booties, that’s another thing you and Chrissy Teigen have in common. Delete it. Wait. Hold on. I’m deleting as we speak, in the future”

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Luke: “I, just… am not very strong anymore”

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Luke: “I… Hmm… I have a, I have a dream, a secret dream”

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Luke: “I’m on that like Hayes on bidets”

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Luke: “It… rocked my world”

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Luke: “Let’s eat all the Impossible Whoppers”

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Luke: “State of the booty”

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Luke and Andrew: “And, please remember: No mountain to tall… And, my Internet won’t work”

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Luke and Andrew: “And, please remember: No mountain to tall… And, my Internet won’t work… Here it is! Okay, set me up one more time”

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Andrew: “Are you shitting me!?”

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Andrew: “Big weekend plans, no. Let’s see: Friday, nope. Saturday, nope. Sunday, nope”

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Andrew: “Good morning. Now, did you delete that BFF app… like I told you to? You don’t need it anymore. You got me”

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Andrew: “Here comes… Mr. Cased Meats, himself, over here, bulging at the seams”

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Andrew: “I coulda been chasing the tail!”

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Andrew: “I don’t know. I think it accentuates my breasts too much”

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Andrew: “I don’t think my… old man brain was ready for that”

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Andrew: “I think I have different budgetary… priorities right now. I’m sorry… Worth it!”

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Andrew: “I think I’m pretty free and clear”

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Andrew: “I’ll look like Mr. Sausage”

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Andrew: “It’s like the trombone of Magical Musical Things”

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Andrew: “It’s not the Doomsday Clock… It’s your Doomsday Clock”

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Andrew: “Knock-knock-knocking on elderly’s door”

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Andrew: “Mmm, that sounds disturbing”

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Andrew: “Oh my God. I’m such an idiot”

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Andrew: “Say goodbye to my bank account”

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Andrew: “Then I go in the locker room; do a little flirting”

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Andrew: “This is no longer about you; and, it’s no longer about the listeners, okay?”

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Andrew: “You are surrounded by Doomsday Clocks”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew making a subpoena spoof

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew saying “That’s coming up… on Too Beautiful To Live” and Luke playing a tune on his Otamatone

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Andrew and Luke: “Do the words ‘Magical Musical Thing’… ring any bells to you at all? I mean, I consider my voice a magical, musical thing”

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Andrew and Luke: Improvised “TBTL: Breaking News” drop

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Andrew and Luke: “Today… forty years ago… three days in the future… one day later… we will talk about that… on The Daily. I don’t know why our show’s now more popular”

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Andrew and Luke: “You don’t know… Nope. The–On the, on the, (You missed your chance to blow) sort of, stem… Yeah, I always do. I miss all the chances to blow that I don’t… (Mmm-hmm) shoot. What?”

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Luke: “I’m sorry… That’s so distracting”

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Luke: “Look at that fatty”

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Luke: “Look out, Michael Barbaro. We’re coming for ya”

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Luke: “Oh, did I drop my towel?”

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Luke: Playing an original composition on his Otamatone

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Luke: Saying “Welcome to The Daily” and playing a tune on his Otamatone

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Luke: Singing the opening to “Dixie”

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Luke: “So, I am surrounded by broken clocks”

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Luke: “Speaking of… being ousted… from life”

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Luke: “Why was it then that when I tried to flirt with you in the locker room, you said… you were not a chubby-chaser?”

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Luke and Andrew: “I watch the Super Bowl for the commercials… Oh-ho-ho-ho, you’re so random”

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Luke and Andrew: “You know what the kids are doing on TikTok, Andrew, besides seductive dances? I don’t know; and, you shouldn’t either”

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Andrew: “And, also, I had that, kind of… that tongue thing”

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Andrew: “And, I’m not somebody to get on my high horse with music, at all; because, I don’t, I don’t have a leg to stand on”

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Andrew: “But, but… but!”

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Andrew: “But, that is some… shade! I love it!”

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Andrew: “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Sarah”

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Andrew: “I don’t know… why or what I’m doing here”

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Andrew: “I thought I only said it inside my head! Do I say the loud part quiet and the quiet part loud?”

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Andrew: “I was thinking about the earwax the whole time!”

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Andrew: “I, I don’t need it. I don’t need it. You can smell me. Do you want to smell me, Andrew?”

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Andrew: “I’d remembered turning Tom Shane down yesterday”

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Andrew: “It wasn’t the weirdest part”

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Andrew: Making disgusted sounds

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Andrew: “Oh, come on, man. Feel my glutes!”

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Andrew: Saying “No… No, I’m good” as if his teeth were being cleaned

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Andrew: “See, that language is salty!”

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Andrew: “She’s gotta be so nice all the time! And, kind, and giving! Kahh! Poough!”

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Andrew: “She’s gotta be so nice all the time! And, kind, and giving! Kahh! Poough! Anyway… Sorry, Phyllis. That was disgusting noises I just made”

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Andrew: “She’s right!? I’m wrong?”

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Andrew: Singing “Just like a white wing dove”

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Andrew: “So, she had him… smell her”

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Andrew: “This is just the dumbest, most… I feel like, knuckle-draggy thing to say”

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Andrew: “Wait… are you asking me if I put too much salad dressing on my donuts?”

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Andrew: “What’s going on, Morgan? Who did you kill?”

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Andrew: “Why am I doing this today?”

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Andrew: “Your drops are all over the place”

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Andrew: “Your drops are all over the place… Not like mine. My library is… pretty uniform”

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Andrew and Luke: “You wanna get your… wanna get your Blurs wet? Yeah… Euugh! No, I don’t”

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Luke: “Andrew! That is fascinating to me. You have… total recall”

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Luke: “Lemme, lemme… clarify that statement; and, lemme take this to a… slightly, possibly weirder place”

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Luke: “Oh, shit… Things are hard”

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Luke: Saying “Would you like to play a game?” in a sing-songy, robotic manner

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Luke: Singing “Been through the desert on a horse with three legs”

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Luke: Singing “Just like the world we know”

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Luke: Singing “Stand back, stand back”

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Luke: “That’s just… how I live. I live más, Andrew”

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Luke: “You may know me from such columns as… ‘I’m Crazy'”

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Luke: “You’ve always been seventy-two, Mr. Tyler”

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