Category: Audio Clips

Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2559: Part Two

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Andrew and Luke: “And, I don’t wanna be rude either; and, these are people who I love dearly. I have to say that ‘cuz they’re probably listening… or, will be at some point. Andrew’s friends, if you’re listening, you can always call us, 205-575-8285. 205-575-8285”

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Andrew and Luke: “But, considering how I just started this damn show, (Exactly) I got no leg to stand on. You’ve outed yourself”

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Andrew and Luke: “Do you have to wake up at 10, or you have to get on the plane at 10? Well, the flight’s at 11, so I’ll probably get up at 10. Shut up. I hate you so much”

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Andrew and Luke: “Do you prefer to have an auto-faucet? I now do; and, it happened… it was just like turning the water (Who are you?) up on a frog. I had to idea (What’s happening to you?) what’s happening… This is a Live Wire thing (I had no idea what was happening to me)”

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Andrew and Luke: “I never… knew how podcasts work. (Yes) Thank you… for explaining it… finally. We put the ‘pot’ in ‘potcast'”

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Andrew and Luke: “I’m gonna start just telling people I’m writing a book just so that I can be less ashamed. I’m writing Luke’s book. Can you build me a book in Minecraft? I can, actually!”

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Andrew and Luke: “More stuff!? Exactly. Get a rope!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Somebody brought a laser baldness helmet. That… first of all, is battery-powered. How dare you? At long last, have you no decency”

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Andrew and Luke: “They do not accept the promo code ‘TBTL’ at checkout… (What!?!) when you’re buying them IRL… I learned that the hard way. Bastards”

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Andrew and Luke: “Yeah, do you want me to open the phones? Tell me when to open the phones. (Open the phones, Walsh!) And, use that, use that terminology. Yeah, okay. Open… open the phones”

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August: “It took, like, a few hours… and then, it became night, and I hided in it”

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Luke: “Even for us, there are tangents that we, there are rocks that we do not turn over; because, the grubby little tangents living under it are too icky… or boring”

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Luke: “He bought a Sprinter van; but, it doesn’t mean he thinks he’s better than anyone else”

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Luke: “How dare you? At long last, have you no decency”

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Luke: “I don’t think grocery stores were designed to be monogamous”

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Luke: “I got something coming out of my pores, it’s vodka… and, I apologize for the smell, everybody”

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Luke: “Or, are you one of those people that… actually are okay, being with yourself with silence… and, what is that like?”

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Luke: Saying “Don’t leave us!!” in a high-pitched voice

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Luke: Saying “Is this good? in a funny manner

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Luke: “See? You’re singing again”

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Luke: “This call is over!!”

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Luke: “We’re already fighting, Andrew”

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Luke: “We’re going out!!!”

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Luke: “Well, what do you know? From the back of a Butler Transportation… executive… Sprinter coach… This is… the first hour of the next twenty-four hours of our life. It’s the TBTL 10th Vanniversary”

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Luke: “What is this? Little House on the friggin’ Prairie?”

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Luke and Andrew: “And… we’re gonna do a lot… of fun stuff; and, some stuff that’s no so fun. Oh, no! I didn’t know about that either! Yeah. That’s how… twenty-four hour… vanniversary broadcast works”

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Luke and Andrew: “For the next… twenty-three or so hours, Andrew… follow every tangent. Yes. Leave no tangent behind!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Hell to the nah! (Who wants that!!?) What is the purpose of that invention, ever? That’s so bad!”

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Luke and Andrew: “I don’t D or D. No”

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Luke and Andrew: “I thought they called you, ‘The Surfer’? Well… they do now”

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Luke and Andrew: Saying “What’s the deal with the underside of…? Who are the seat wizards?” as Jerry Seinfeld

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2559: Part One

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Andrew: “Also, you’re a very private person”

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Andrew: “Anyway, that’s just a teaser. It’s not a good teaser; but, it’s a teaser”

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Andrew: Drawn out “Hooray for you!”

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Andrew: “How’s it reaching your earballs?”

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Andrew: “I am the one who clocks!!”

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Andrew: “I didn’t want to laugh; because… in case you were serious, I didn’t want to insult you”

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Andrew: “I don’t care about the money. I just care for the stuff”

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Andrew: “I don’t wanna be shitty about this”

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Andrew: “I dunno, dude! Why are you yelling at me?”

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Andrew: “I got mine!”

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Andrew: “I hope Burt’s Bees isn’t like… too hippy-dippy”

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Andrew: “I smoked… tons of weed”

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Andrew: “I’m still Andrew… from… the Wallingford block”

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Andrew: “I’m sure that’s obvious to you, cuz you’re an adult”

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Andrew: Making a mouth farting noise

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Andrew: “Oh, no”

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Andrew: “Oh, no! Night’s coming. The spiders are gonna come!”

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Andrew: “Oh, sorry. Well, clearly, that wasn’t you”

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Andrew: “Oh, yeah, I do this… in Minecraft”

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Andrew: “Okay. Yeah, we can stop”

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Andrew: Singing “Amazing Grace”

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Andrew: Singing “Ricola”

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Andrew: “That… worked!”

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Andrew: “What did you have in there!?”

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Andrew: “What’s the hurry!?”

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Andrew: “When does this stop being a podcast and more of a filibuster?”

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Andrew: “When people don’t like my stories, they can just interrupt me now. Are you ready for this?”

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Andrew: “Wow. You’ve changed… You’ve changed a lot”

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Andrew: “Yahoo!”

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Andrew: “You can’t keep a Landjäger away from my face, it turns out”

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Andrew: “You know… what’s the other game I play, Hearthstone, on my, on my boop-boop, you know”

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Andrew: “You’re Susie Burbank’s son. You tell me”

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Audio Clips

Clips From What The Hell Is TBTL?

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Andrew: “And then, my relationship got pitted!”

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Andrew: “But, you realize that we’re already in the hole on that with just your introduction to me”

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Andrew: “I just like to putter around the house! And, that’s why I’m single”

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Andrew: “I’m a big fan of mine!”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Oh, no. Hi… First of all, hello, Luke. Hello, new listeners”

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Andrew: “Sell it! Sell it, Susie!”

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Andrew: “She had to use a fake name! You could just… hear the shame dripping off her voice”

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Andrew: “Your mom’s a pirate!”

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Andrew and Luke: “I’ve always felt like a usurper… right? Or a uSURPer. Mmm-hmm. Or a usurPER! Right”

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Andrew and Luke: “Oh, good, you got some love panky music (Yeah, exactly)”

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Luke: “I don’t wanna seem… too pathetic, or too on-the-nose”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “So, stay with us. This is TBTL… What the Hell is TBTL!?”

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Luke: TBTL is like a favela of self-referentialness

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Luke: “That really seems, kind of, like the bookends… of a life… really… The intake… of the bad idea food; and then, the output… of the bad idea food somewhere else. We cover the whole circle of life on this show”

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Luke: “Think of it as sort of a… TBTL 101”

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Luke: “Welcome everybody… to a special introductory edition of TBTL!”

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Luke: “What have you heard?”

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Luke: “What’s going on there, Ma? What’s the scene?”

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Luke: “Whatever brought you here. Whatever… broken road brought you home to us… we’re happy about it”

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Luke and Andrew: “Andrew… take us into your world. I don’t have anything… prepared at all!”

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Luke and Andrew: “How do your friends describe you, Andrew? Real surfy”

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Luke and Andrew: “So, that… is… That is the tree… that this apple fell from… Walsh. Not too far. Not too far at all”

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Susie Burbank: “Created and hosted by a… natural communicator… you. That’s you’re… that… you’re a natural communicator… You’ve got the gift of gab”

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Susie Burbank: “I mean, you would put Tonya Harding to shame… you know”

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Susie Burbank: “You know, I understand, ‘What the Hell is TBTL’ rhymes… but… ooh, you couldn’t think of a nicer with than that?”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2558

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Andrew: “And, he’s just gotta deal with a poop leak”

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Andrew: “Aww, it’s a mom’s cooking joke!”

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Andrew: “Do not worry about it. It’s just been a weird week… I just wanted to say that; calm everybody down”

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Andrew: “God, is this getting too personal?”

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Andrew: “Hey, you introduced me right at the perfect time… cuz, I was about to get into an ill-advised… pedantic fight with a listener online, that I was sure to lose”

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Andrew: “I came for the little moustaches… I stayed for the conspiracy theories”

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Andrew: “I knew that next line! I’m so mad I couldn’t come up with it!”

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Andrew: “I’ll cool my jets”

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Andrew: “Oh, my God! Well, you showed her!”

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Andrew: “Ohhh, my. Save it for the van”

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: “We can do what we want”

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Andrew: “We have a plumbing situation here”

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Andrew: “What’s happening? There was a bible… slash… sports psychology class?”

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Andrew and Luke: “Yeah, you do sound like one of them famous Michigan cowboys… when you say it that way. Are you a Yooper? Are you a Flatlander? Eh, came down from Caro”

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Luke: “And, about to hear something… that’s probably never been heard before”

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Luke: “And, like… go to Z Town”

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Luke: “And, uh… things are gonna get loopy… okay? Things are going to get… wild and crazy”

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Luke: “Give it about twenty-seven hours, bro!”

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Luke: “Plus, my hair is just spun sugar with all that Toppik in here; so, that can’t get wet”

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Luke: Saying “All you can eat, baby!” in a funny accent

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Luke: “We have some buffer built in; but, it’s fun buffer”

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Luke: “You can find out in… thirty-fives minutes or less; or, your pizza is free. By the way, we don’t have any free pizza”

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Luke: “You can’t ride with my Little Red Baggin!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Because, we have created… what we hope… is kind of… an entry point… to this… bizarre… twisted… overgrown universe of inside jokes and Aerosmith commentary. And… Your number one source for Aerosmith commentary. No! Your number one source for uninformed Aerosmith commentary”

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Luke and Andrew: “But, I ate way worse things as a kid, I’m sure… You think so? Just my mom’s cooking. Aww, it’s a mom’s cooking joke!”

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Luke and Andrew: “I’m gonna say that you lost me for a hot minute there… Nyah, I don’t think it made any sense”

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Luke and Andrew: “Oh my goodness… I thought that was a drop! I thought that was a drop for a second”

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Luke and Andrew: “The Hotel’s Calling… Oh, I love that song (That’s a… latter work from them)”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2557

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Andrew: “Could we call it, ‘The Tenth Dab-iversary’?”

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Andrew: “Didn’t you see me scowl!? I was clearly scowling at my wallet, sir. I want to tip you”

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Andrew: Having a very good laugh

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Andrew: “I am… not being a very, ‘Yes, and’ co-host right now. I apologize”

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Andrew: “I will go my whole life without dabbing”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Quietly saying “Thought I was gonna say the tagline”

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Andrew: Singing “Hello, Burbank”

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Andrew: “So, I’m also ashamed”

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Andrew: “So, that’s an unsettling story”

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Andrew: “This is just delicious. I, I wanna talk about this”

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Andrew: “Ugh, God! How did I miss that?”

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Andrew: “Yeah. Gah. Oh, ahh!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Okay, I’m talking to you again, Luke… Yeah, I’m here”

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Luke: “And, I gotta… get outta here, by the way”

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Luke: “And, the Susie Burbank in my brain just… went… ba-nuts, as we used to say”

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Luke: “Because… I’m Mister Brightside”

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Luke: “Don’t… jinx it!”

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Luke: “Fo’ bezel, my rezzle [ph]“

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Luke: “For all of her dreamin’ and all of her schemin'”

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Luke: “Haven’t you had enough salad, Mr. Burbank?”

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Luke: “I can’t have you going out with a neck crackle… days before the twenty-four hour-a-thon, bro! Excuse me… the Tenth Vanniversary”

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Luke: “I’m starting to wonder if this whole… what do they call it… iPhone. That’s what they call them”

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Luke: “If they didn’t see the tip, what is the point?”

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Luke: “It ain’t all I can eat, yet!”

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Luke: “Listen… feed your children with my wallet scowl”

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Luke: “Pardon me for the comparison; but, it was sort of like a speculum for your ear”

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Luke: Saying “The idea that they would be sitting on their own hats” in a funny manner

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Luke: Singing “Mister Bezel, yeah”

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Luke: “Sue me… Sue me for wha’?”

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Luke: “The scowl seen ’round the bar at Neumos”

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Luke: “This… is… really… a situation, my friend”

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Luke: “Ya know… I did not… love it”

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Luke and Andrew: “Did you wear my hat? Were you wearing my hat? (Right)”

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Luke and Andrew: “I’m looking at a different article (Oh!) than you are… by the way. I’m looking at the one form the Washington Post; cuz, I’m a little better than you. (Ohh!) Right, I’m sure it was in your style section, fancy pockets. Exactly”

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Luke and Andrew: “Upload your personality to the cloud; so, that, if you get a cold, it won’t be lost. If I could do that, I would certainly upload a different personality to the cloud, dude”

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