Category: Audio Clips

Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2577

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Andrew: “Alright, get ready to blush, everybody… Earmuffs, kids!”

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Andrew: “And now, I wish I could burn that episode of TBTL”

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Andrew: “And, if those are alligator boots, you’re a sick bastard”

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Andrew: “By the way, I have no idea why Genevieve is still with me”

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Andrew: Cute Laugh

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Andrew: “Epithode”

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Andrew: “Get off my back! For Christ’s sake”

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Andrew: Having a good laugh

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Andrew: “Hey, wha’ happened?”

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Andrew: “I don’t wanna be the asshole producer in Seattle”

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Andrew: “I have a lot of dazzling deets on that”

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Andrew: “I think this is a s…tupid idea”

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Andrew: “I’m the schlubby-dubby guy that I just described… who’s picking Silly Putty outta of his pocket”

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Andrew: “It’s really kinda gross”

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Andrew: Making thinking sounds

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Andrew: “Nuh-uh!”

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Andrew: “Okay, we’ll leave you sniffling in, me gurgling at times”

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Andrew: “Please stop looking at… Nick’s soft, potato-like lips”

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Andrew: Saying “And, I’m hoping it’s gonna be a doozy!” in a funny, drawn out manner

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Andrew: Saying “What about me? I thought you hated me?” in drawn out, whiny manner

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Andrew: “Sorry, listeners! Sorry, Bean!”

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Andrew: “The bobsled coach was a woman!”

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Andrew: “The first one of… ever”

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Andrew: “The King of Distinguished Numbers?”

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Andrew: “They saw something and they said something!”

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Andrew: “We are… still animals”

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Andrew: “What does it mean if you’re a drip? Oh, no. I’m sorry… That means you’re me”

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Andrew and Hanna Brooks Olsen: “Anyway… You just wanted something to talk about other than your shame”

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Andrew and Hanna Brooks Olsen: “Are you taking a selfie? Yeah, I am taking a selfie… Keep going! Keep going!”

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Andrew and Hanna Brooks Olsen: “I made a horrible mistake… Why? When getting into Top Stories, this is like the only time in TBTL that we didn’t play the Top Story sounder. I totally just forgot about it”

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Andrew and Hanna Brooks Olsen: “No shit!!! (That’s what I’ve heard)”

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Andrew and Hanna Brooks Olsen: “Not a lotta crime in New Hampshire; but… dark-ass crime (Yeah) in New Hampshire; like, crazy shit”

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Andrew and Hanna Brooks Olsen: “What does it mean if you say, ‘Ping me’? You’re an asshole? You’re awful?”

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Andrew and Nick Jarin: “Cuz, I was sniffing right before the break (Sorry!)”

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Andrew, Hanna Brooks Olsen and Nick Jarin: “Also, I don’t know if we’re gonna have time to get to this. My girlfriend just posted this on Facebook… and, so I figured… that’s the… Great tease, Walsh! That’s how you know it’s top-of-the-line news”

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Andrew, Hanna Brooks Olsen and Nick Jarin: “In the meantime, please remember: No mountain too tall; and, good luck to all”

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Hanna Brooks Olsen: Drawn out “Oh, no!”

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Hanna Brooks Olsen: “Oh, no! Oh, no”

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Hanna Brooks Olsen: Saying “I don’t know how to call anybody!” in a funny manner

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Hanna Brooks Olsen: “Yes!!!”

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Hanna Brooks Olsen and Andrew: “New Hampshire? New Hampshire!?”

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Hanna Brooks Olsen and Andrew: “Wait, wait, wait. With Dockers!? How does one bring this outfit together!? One… just… never… cared”

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Nick Jarin: “Hooray, beer!”

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Nick Jarin: “It’s because it’s an Afro-futurism coronation!”

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Nick Jarin: “WomenTheyBeBobsledding.com”

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Nick Jarin and Andrew: “Why does he have (Yes) the bobsled? First of all, sexist. It’s a she”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2576

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Andrew: “Bean, bean, bean, bean”

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Andrew: “By the way, don’t think #QuipLifestyle is a thing… but, still… I’m living it”

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Andrew: “Cuz, I know this is gonna get hard and I know that I’m gonna embarrass myself… with something really easy”

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Andrew: Drawn out “Ahhh”

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Andrew: “Here’s how I see Valentine’s Day, Sweetie”

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Andrew: “I dunno man… Suddenly, this Doogie theme just pales in comparison to the bean song”

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Andrew: “I said Dream Talk was over”

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Andrew: “I should’ve just, I should’ve just, like, flopped on the first one”

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Andrew: “I want to be legitimately… shocked, awed, delighted and surprised”

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Andrew: “I wish I could turn back time”

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Andrew: “I’m a real Gen Xer”

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Andrew: “I’m killing it in the boyfriend department”

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Andrew: “I’m Stanford Blade. More at Eleven”

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Andrew: “It was like my brain was a CD that was skipping… and I just kept hearing, ‘Male Palentine’s Day! Male Palentine’s Day!’… over and over and over again”

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Andrew: “It’s literally my favorite song right now”

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Andrew: “Let me tell you who I am. My name’s Andrew Walsh… this show’s called, ‘Too Beautiful to Live’… usually hosted by Luke Burbank. He’s not here today; which, is why I am going to tell you… about a dream I had last night”

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Andrew: Listing off exceptions with a lot of commas

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Andrew: “New York City!?”

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Andrew: “No poison ivy? Happy Valentine’s Day, Sweetie!!”

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Andrew: “Now… Bean, you’re not gonna tell on me, are you?”

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Andrew: “Oogh! If I get this wrong, I know a lot of our listeners are gonna be mad”

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Andrew: Saying “Spill the beans, Bean!” and playing the “Baked Bean Song”

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Andrew: “So far, I’m killing it”

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Andrew: “So, what you do think the very first thing I did was? Knowing how horrible this joke was… both in my dream and in reality, what do you think the very first thing I did was? I told it to my girlfriend… And, her reaction was exactly… what yours was, right there… Dead silence”

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Andrew: “Sometimes I feel like you are the only person who understands me”

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Andrew: “This is gonna sound so corny and old manny”

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Andrew: “Tongue-in-cheeking it”

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Andrew: “We are not the podcast that leads. We are the podcast that follows the guy who is sweeping up… after… the last followers out the door”

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Andrew: “What are people doing?”

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Andrew: “What’s on your mind?”

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Andrew and Bean Baxter: “No mountain to tall… and, good luck to all!”

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Andrew and Bean Baxter: “Well, not nothing. I mean, really nothing… is what we’re doing. I said, ‘not nothing’; but, I was gonna say, ‘not anything’ and I said, ‘not nothing’. Mmm-hmm”

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Bean Baxter: Disapproving “Andrew!”

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Bean Baxter: “I am the smartest guy in the world!”

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Bean Baxter: “Mardi Gras is not… for me”

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Bean Baxter: “Oh, they’re idiots, Andrew”

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Bean Baxter: “Po’ boy is po’ boy”

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Bean Baxter and Andrew: “Higher? (Higher) Higher? (Higher) Higher? Higher”

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Bean Baxter and Andrew: “We’re going deep into po’ boy… Oh, no, we’re going deep here… I mean, people’s ears are bleeding over this. I mean, it is the worst thing you can possibly do to the South”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2575

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Andrew: “And then, we would put the Little Red Bandwagon out of business”

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Andrew: Cute Laugh

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Andrew: “‘Don’t know where they got that from… His family is in Pyongyang [sic] and showed his dad wearing a Browns hat.’ Ha!”

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Andrew: “Every single night, sitting in my room listening to ‘Melancholy and the Infinite Sadness'”

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Andrew: “Hide the remotes! The Burbanks’ coming!”

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Andrew: “I don’t usually… talk smack about my girlfriend”

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Andrew: “I’m being gently nudged by Genevieve to expand my bone collecting and bone boiling business”

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Andrew: “Just thinking of… like, what is my post-Luke plan for TBTL, you know”

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Andrew: “Oh, no! Oh, no!!”

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Andrew: “Oh, really!?”

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Andrew: Quietly saying “I feel awful”

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Andrew: “The new brush heads are here! The new brush heads are here! Well, they’re not here yet”

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Andrew: “What if I went into your kitchen and I just open up all the drawers… and every utensil is just a television remote control?”

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Andrew: Whispering “TBTL is Missed Connectors”

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Andrew: “Yeah, you might be in a pho bubble… It’s a pho boble”

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Andrew and Luke: “Hey, Luke… Do you wanna see… do you wanna see my bones? Ooh… What’s the hardest, hard pass?”

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Andrew and Luke: “Yeah, I’m a little nervous about the bones that I bought yesterday… speaking of marrow… Some of them look human? Just vaguely humanesque”

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Luke: “And, I gotta be honest, I get some weird pleasure out of making you nervous about my flight stuff”

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Luke: “Boy, I hope she doesn’t hear this”

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Luke: “Do you know that I just randomly thought of that the other day and just had a wave of regret wash over me?”

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Luke: Funny Laugh

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Luke: “He’s got a freezer full of bones; but, that doesn’t mean he’s better than anyone else (There’s something about the soul of a Fireball)”

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Luke: “Lemme #FrameThis”

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Luke: “Let’s do an e-mail frenzy!”

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Luke: “Lewis!”

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Luke: “New York Jersey!?”

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Luke: “Oh, no!”

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Luke: “Power using and P1-ing”

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Luke: “Real Change!”

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Luke: Singing “Bugler’s Dream” (aka ABC/NBC’s Olympics Theme)

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Luke: Singing “I used to be a little girl” as The Smashing Pumpkins

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Luke: Singing “Killer in me is the killer in you” as The Smashing Pumpkins

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Luke: Singing “Oh, Lamb of God, sweet Lamb of God”

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Luke: “This is on me… I wanna own that. I wanna apologize in advance. I want you guys to know… where you should be sending the angry letters… those should be sent to andrew@tbtl.net“

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Luke: “Verbal free jazz?”

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Luke: “We do all of that stuff, and… we’re gonna do it all the different ways”

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Luke and Andrew: “I, you know… I gotta be honest with you… Uh-oh”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2574

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Andrew: “Actually, I just looked it up… we’re both… invented by Edgar Allan Poe… We couldn’t have been more wrong. No, just kidding”

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Andrew: “Cats Wide Shut”

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Andrew: “Hard hat, work pail”

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Andrew: “He had millennial lips”

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Andrew: “Hey, I just thought of something. Not that it’s super interesting; but, I finally have an answer to your question, and then we can move on”

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Andrew: “I apologize. I realize I have… just resting Walsh face”

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Andrew: “I dunno if I would call it a, a… a Cranky Yanky rant… necessarily”

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Andrew: “It’s my Wednesday! It’s my tonight pants Wednesday”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Now I’m stressed. I don’t even know what it is”

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Andrew: Quietly saying “I’m gonna say it; but, I’m gonna whisper it”

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Andrew: Saying “It stinks!!” in a Jay Sherman-like manner

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Andrew: Saying “Squad!?” in a funny manner

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Andrew: “So, I’ve got a freezer full of bones right now; and, next weekend, we’ll start… boiling them bones, them bones!”

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Andrew: “This is a Cranky Yandy review”

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Andrew: “Yeah, well… it’s disturbing; but, also kinda fun”

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Andrew and Luke: “Can I paint flowers on you? Ohhhhhhhh, noooooooooo (Ohhh… and nobody ever… had relations again)”

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Andrew and Luke: “Free the Jordan Five! Exactly”

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Andrew and Luke: “I did something for the first time this weekend… I bought bones… My bone collecting tendencies have gotten to the point where I am now buying bones, not just (What!?!) saving bones from the foods that I eat. Are you serious? (Tell ’em The Bone sent ya) I’m… I’m serious”

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Andrew and Luke: “I have a sound effect that I hit about five seconds ago. It finally came through. Well, it’s like a cat… it doesn’t… that sound effect doesn’t play when you want it. It takes notes and gets back to you”

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Andrew and Luke: “We should have a sounder, and maybe some music underneath it. I got one idea. Oh, Yandy from the Basement?”

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Luke: “Alright, Yandy from the Basement. What do you got?”

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Luke: “But, you are an a-hole”

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Luke: “Can you stop… naming shows!?”

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Luke: Drawn out “Meow?”

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Luke: “First things first… I feel like such… a poser when I try to say, ‘Po’boy’. Can there be… for those of us that didn’t grow up in N’awlins… can we call it a ‘Poor Boy’? Do I have to call it a ‘Po’boy’? I’d feel like I’m trying to hard with that”

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Luke: “I wanna call it, ‘The Girl with the Danish Tattoo’; but, that’s… not a movie”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: Laughing and saying “Exactly!”

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Luke: “My voice just cracked. Is that weird at forty-one?”

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Luke: “Quoth the raven”

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Luke: Saying “I don’t see nothing wrong” in a funny, sing-songy manner

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Luke: “Wow, it’s time to do this… again? Already?”

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Luke: “Yeah, no shit, Sherlock”

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Luke: “You know how I’m introducing you tomorrow, ‘He’s got a freezer full of bones… and he’s all out of bubblegum'”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke accidentally trigged the e-mail frenzy version of the Strong Bad e-mail drop and Andrew started freaking out

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2573

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Andrew: “Artsy-fartsy”

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Andrew: Deep “Mmm… Mmm-hmm”

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Andrew: “Er, okay. Uh, er, er”

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Andrew: “God! This is very personal… I didn’t even tell Genevieve this; but, I don’t think she would mind me saying this”

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Andrew: “Half coughing… half sling-blading”

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Andrew: “He’s not drunk, he’s DRUNK!”

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Andrew: “Holy crap, you’re tight!”

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Andrew: “I’ll bet you he’s very popular and I’m just an old man”

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Andrew: “I’m just gonna get out of the bed and go out and sleep on the couch; where, I can cough and sling-blade to my heart’s desire”

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Andrew: “It makes me giggle every time!”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Mimicking a cough

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Andrew: “No, no, no. I think we hone, not foam”

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Andrew: “Nothing stops this train! Nothing!”

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Andrew: “Now, follow me here for a second”

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Andrew: Saying “Sasquad!?” in a funny manner

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Andrew: Saying “Squad!?” in a funny manner

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Andrew: Saying “Squad!?” in a funny manner #2

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Andrew: Saying “Squad!?” in a funny manner #3

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Andrew: Saying “Squanch” in a gruff manner

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Andrew: Singing “Hello, Luke Burbank!”

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Andrew: “TBTL! TBTL!”

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Andrew: “Thank you!!! Thank you!”

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Andrew: “That… doesn’t pay off for me in the end”

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Andrew: “Well, I think the best thing for a… cold, is to put them in the… sunshine of my slumber”

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Andrew and Luke: “And, again, as somebody (Yeah) who isn’t totally comfortable with strangers… I spent the rest of the evening hoping that drunk Tim would come back and give me another… surprise massage”

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Andrew and Luke: “Can I tell you about a surprise massage I had? Umm… yes! Those words sound only barely legal”

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Andrew and Luke: “I don’t mind a surprise massage from drunk Tim every now and then (Ha!!!)”

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Andrew and Luke: Sling-blading

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Luke: Cute Chuckles

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Luke: Deep “Mmm-hmm”

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Luke: “Did you hear that, Rudy? Cocksquanches!”

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Luke: “Do you know what I’m talking about? Does any of this make any sense?”

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Luke: “‘Harvey Weinstein. He’s a jive motherfucker'”

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Luke: “How do I say this in a way that will not cost me getting this gig next year? Well, I don’t care. Whatever”

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Luke: “I need to… figure out… what it is my face is doing when I’m listening to Carey talk about things (That’s my woife!)”

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Luke: “I’ll say, I’ll try to say this in three sentences… and, then, shut my yapper!”

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Luke: “It was some early Siri shit going on”

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Luke: “It”s lit!!”

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Luke: “My University of Washington Huskies… men’s basketball team just absolutely squanched the bed…against Oregon”

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Luke: “No offense, public radio… but, like, really!?”

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Luke: “Sasquanch!”

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Luke: Saying “I reckon I ain’t got no reason to keep nobody up” as Kyle Childers

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Luke: Saying “Luke Burbank… Man of God” in a deep voice

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Luke: Saying “Squad!?” in a funny manner

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Luke: Saying “Squanch!?” in a funny manner

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Luke: “‘They were no playing, motherfuckers'”

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Luke: “We have got this guy. I hired him about a hundred years ago… to be the co-bro of the show; which, makes him the longest running… co-bro of the program”

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Luke: “‘Yeah, motherfucker! Because, it ain’t you'”

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Luke and Andrew: “It’s turning (It’s heating up, man) into a real, a real squanch-burner”

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Luke and Andrew: “You did it… Burbs (Right)”

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Luke and Andrew: “You need drunk Tim to come massage your regret center in your brain… Oh, yes”

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Audio Clips

Clips From TBTL #2572

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Andrew: “Hey, Luke Burbank… I just remembered to turn on my microphone”

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Andrew: “I apologize to everybody, not even… those who live in the great state of Illinois… Everybody. I apologize. You deserve better from your… podcast co-hosts”

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Andrew: “I believe it’s pronounced, ‘Chicagos'”

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Andrew: “I didn’t want to start here”

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Andrew: “I don’t wanna take this to Boring Town”

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Andrew: “I have a question for you”

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Andrew: “I have the money-clumping cat litter… You just throw money in it and it all clumps together”

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Andrew: “I was there when you stubbed your toe”

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Andrew: “I would… I would take that bet… Give it to me and let me see how I do”

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Andrew: “I’m not super… into drugs; but, I love a good NyQuil high”

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Andrew: “‘I’m writing you, because my wife’s birthday will be on February the 8th’… That’s today, Luke”

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Andrew: “I’m… dirtbaggy anyway”

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Andrew: “I’ve, I was… I was riding a magic… a magic carpet ride, man. I was a little floating still”

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Andrew: “It says, ‘Illinoise’ [ph] on it. Yeah”

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Andrew: “Just cuz we’re b…acking the Starbleeper into this”

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “I am so confused”

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Andrew: “Let’s just go into the rumpus room”

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Andrew: “No! I’m just getting dumber!”

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Andrew: “Nope. If this ever happens again, I am going to schedule a driver and you’re knocking me… the eff out! I’m… I’m… Cranky… Yandy”

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Andrew: “Okay, this, yeah, this is… this is cranky”

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Andrew: “Please… I’m Yandy”

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Andrew: Quietly saying “Oh, no!”

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Andrew: “This has shaken me to my core!”

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Andrew: “Turn in my everything card!”

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Andrew: “Wow!! That’s some… ROI right there”

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Andrew: “Yeah! It’s Starfucker, from way back in the day”

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Andrew and Luke: “And, I was talking into a microphone which reeked… of bad breath, by the way… Whoa!!!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Did I say, ‘Illinoise’ [ph] a second ago? Did I, I think I said, ‘Illinoise’. [ph] I think you did. Oh my… Christ! I feel–do you want my resignation? Turn in your Midwest card? Turn in my everything card! I can’t believe I did that!”

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Andrew and Luke: “I mean, we could just totally steal the bit form ol’ Gary… Yeah. His lawyers got better things to do than to sue us, these days. Am I allowed to say that!?”

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Luke: “And, I realized… I have made out with that microphone countless times”

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Luke: “Cranky Andy calls it ‘Starbleeper’… Cranky Yandy says the whole name”

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Luke: “Cuz, that’s the kind of narcissism that I live with, Andrew… And, I don’t wish it upon anyone”

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Luke: “Do you think I can take this to a more boring place? Cuz, I’m, I’m about to. Are you ready? Are you sitting down?”

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Luke: “Here’s my… thousand dollar folly”

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Luke: “‘Hey, Paisly! Duck and cover!’ Just fire a dirt clod at him”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Oof!”

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Luke: Singing “It’s just a matter of time”

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Luke: Singing “You’re a rich Walsh! You don’t drive a car”

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Luke: “That’s a little squishy”

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Luke: “What’s the easiest way for me to not deal with this?”

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Luke: Whispering “By the way”

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Luke and Andrew: “Of all the places… of all the places, that I want to be making sweet mouth love to a micrphone… Mandarin Gate… really low on the list (Mmm-hmm)”

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Luke and Andrew: “That’s rich! One hundo a day”

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Luke and Andrew: The DASLing Donors of the Day

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Luke and Andrew: “You’ve got places to be and people to see… after this… Tongues to inspect”

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