Marsupial Gurgle

Listener Ariel left a voicemail message which included her singing a song from her childhood; and, Senior Janitorial Correspondent, Listener Kevin, left a voicemail message describe a pretty darn gross mess he encountered while doing his cleaning at Perdue. The Kevin’s voicemail was played after the closing song finished; but, Luke and Andrew stuck around to have their reactions on tape.

Listener Ariel: Singing the RHK song

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Listener Kevin: Senior Janitorial Correspondent report

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Andrew: “Can I, and I don’t wanna spoil that segment… and, I probably should just wait to tell you about this, but I can’t wait… What in the world is going on with hotels… and… meat?”

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Andrew: “I know!!”

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Andrew: “I, I, I feel like it’s April Fools’!”

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Andrew: “I’m older now”

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Andrew: “It’s not like Human Centipede”

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Andrew: Making a sad horn-like sound

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Andrew: Saying “I was waiting!” in a sing-songy manner

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Andrew: “Shut up! I’m a podcaster!”

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Andrew: Singing the “On The Media” theme

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Andrew: “Spoiler Alert”

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Andrew: “This is just great! I’ll have no friends again!”

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Andrew: “This is real mandy-pamby [sic]“

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Andrew: “What if I reached out to our pal Linh, who runs Marsupial Gurgle… would you be comfortable with him hosting it? Cuz, he’s–Cuz, I’ll tell you what, I’m not loading this to my YouTube site. Like, I got some stuff up there. I’m… I would need to create a burner YouTube site for this thing”

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Andrew: “What in the world is going on with hotels… and… meat?”

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Andrew: “When I smell Greek yogurt, I’ve told you this, I… I gag”

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Andrew: “You know, I admit to being… saying some real doofus-y things on this show”

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Andrew and Luke: “I don’t know if this is interesting or not; but, in TBTL fashion, I’ll plow ahead. And, if it’s not interesting, (Like it) I’ll only talk about it for about fifty of those sixty hours”

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Andrew and Luke: “Is this where we say, ‘Power out’? Yep! (Power out!)”

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Andrew and Luke: Laughing

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Andrew and Luke: “She’ll do it all again, right up to the blursting! She’ll… (Yes!) she’ll eat it and then she’ll blurst it again; and, then, she’ll… start right over”

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Andrew and Luke: “The only reason I’m your co-host, still, is because everybody hated me… when I first started. And, you’re like, ‘Fine! I’m hiring him full time’ Double down! Hope you’re happy! Hope you’re happy”

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Andrew and Luke: “Yeah. Never mind. I was thinking about something really, really gross my cat did… a few days ago. (Ooh!) But, egh”

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Luke: “Great! Now I gotta make more friends again!”

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Luke: “Huzzah! You’re back!”

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Luke: “I almost called him ‘Bill Guy the Science Guy'”

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Luke: “I am one of the leading debtrepreneurs… out there”

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Luke: “I’m out!”

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Luke: Making a funny sound

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Luke: “My name is Luke Burbank. I’m your host, weighing in at 183 pounds… (Ooooh!) Just thought I’d… update everybody on that”

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Luke: “Oh my God, dude”

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Luke: “Ooh, that doesn’t hold up well”

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Luke: “So good job… one good person at FOX News”

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Luke: “So, this could go from one to sixty… hours, everybody; so… buckle up”

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Luke: “Take that, Walsh!”

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Luke: “What weighs more: a pound of lettuce or a pound of meat noodles?”

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Luke: “You ready for this, Yellow Shadow?”

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Luke and Andrew: “Also, I guess, if you have, somebody already went to the bathroom in the toilet and someone throws up into that… (Oh, God) I think that you have what we have to describe as a turducken. (You’re a gross person) Is this where we say, ‘Power out’? Yep! (Power out!)”

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Luke and Andrew: “And we thought, ‘Ooh, that was gross’… and then… she shot… a larger volume of hot ham water… (Mmm, God… just don’t finish, don’t, don’t finish this sentence…) out the other end. (We knew) You, I mean, you knew where it was going… that was diplomatic. No, it was… it could’ve been… certainly, could’ve been worse”

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Luke and Andrew: “I hope you’re sitting down for this… (Uh-huh) I saw this article… on… FOX News… Forgive me for that; but, it’s a great article”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke attempting to describe what happens in Human Centipede and Andrew gets grossed out

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Luke and Andrew: Singing the “On The Media” theme

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Luke and Andrew: “You would rather… die than eat cottage cheese, right? Yeah, I think so… I mean, literally, I think so”

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Andrew: “And this is, this is where I’m gonna lose everybody; cuz, they’re just gonna think, ‘Oh, Andrew’s just a weirdo'”

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Andrew: “Earmuffs”

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Andrew: Having a good laugh

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Andrew: “I also think it’s like a… not talked about much neighborhood… probably could’ve said that differently”

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Andrew: “I feel great, man!”

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Andrew: “I feel like Old Andrew; and, I don’t, I didn’t realize I wasn’t feeling like Old Andrew”

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Andrew: “I’m all about… being tight these days”

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Andrew: “It’s very, uh… not great”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing #2

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Andrew: Laughing #3

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Andrew: Laughing #4

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Andrew: Laughing #5

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “How did these buff Bacharachs… escape my radar, dude?”

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “You’ve been thanked!!”

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Andrew: “Nothing too fancy; you know I don’t like the fancy”

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Andrew: “Oh my God!”

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Andrew: “Oh!!”

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Andrew: “Oops”

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Andrew: “Put me in. Put me in!”

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Andrew: “Speaking of… Oops”

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Andrew: “Uh, hello? This message is for Andrew… Walsh… We were wondering if Madeleine has time for the Bioscarf… Anyway”

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Andrew: “Wanna win a Weiner Warrior shirt?”

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Andrew: “What you’re saying to me doesn’t make sense; and, you just keep saying the same things over”

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Andrew: “You know how sometimes… I just sound like such an old man”

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Andrew: “You said something really long about… the… what is that guy’s name? The Fu… The Fu-Tang… The Fu-Tang Clan?”

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Andrew: “You’ll want to eat liver every day!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Although, objectively speaking, this is a terrible song… Oh, you think?”

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Andrew and Luke: “I am, I’m wearing, I think I’m wearing black Vans right now; so, (Oh, really?) very appropriate drop”

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Andrew and Luke: “Is everything kind of cast in a blue-purple hue? Yes!!! That’s the ’90s, man!”

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Luke: “A guy named Nick Burchill… was staying in a fancy restaurant… excuse me… a fancy hotel. I’m sure they had a restaurant there too”

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Luke: Cute laugh

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Luke: Funny laugh

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Luke: Funny sound

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Luke: “Hey, let’s… let’s… let’s… you know what we’re gonna do? We’re gonna push this… we’re gonna push this Top Story”

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Luke: “It’s time to thank the Donors of the Day. These are true Fu-Schnicks… They’re what? They’re true Fu-Schnicks”

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Luke: “Lukey B! It’s Fu-Schnickens! Ring the alarm!”

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Luke: “Lukey B! Would you like to interview… k.d. lang’s… entertainment lawyer, Steven Stone?”

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Luke: Making a funny sound

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Luke: “Oh, why… why did I say I was gonna do this?”

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Luke: “Ru-dog… get in here!”

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Luke: Saying “Tom Leykis… The Professor, Flash Friday” in a gruff, radio voice

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Luke: “What!!?!”

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Luke: “What’s up, docs? Can we rocks?”

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Luke: “Yeah, you never wanna go full 3-D”

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Luke and Andrew: “Nobody sounds like Fu-Schnickens anymore. Who?!! Is that another agent of yours? Lukey B! It’s Fu-Schnickens! Ring the alarm!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Pickles… I’ll be fine. You’re so very dare-y”

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Luke and Andrew: “This is actually Shaquille O’Neal… Oh! ‘(I Know I Got) Skillz’ Sorry… the joke was lost on me”

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Luke and Andrew: “You were gonna say something about The Stranger… Oh… no! I was gonna say something about me”

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Luke and Andrew: “Yuuuuup! (Yuuup!)”

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Andrew: “Anyway… I probably should’ve told you that off-air; but, I didn’t. And, now you’re gonna be even later to go to the fart arcade”

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Andrew: Drawn out “Yes!”

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Andrew: “He was the complete opposite of me; cuz, I’m the opposite of a d-bag”

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Andrew: “Hello, Luke! Day two… of the Roosevelt era”

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Andrew: “I don’t, I don’t wanna… well, I guess I don’t really care if I call… cause any strife between you guys; cuz, I don’t have to deal with the fallout. But…”

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Andrew: “I love that store; it’s my happy place”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “No, I’m the guy sitting on the top of the mountain. There’s this short, bald guy that kept climbing up; and, I kept kicking him back down”

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Andrew: “No, that’s not it. Dang it, man!”

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Andrew: “Oh, nice! That’s good… that’s extra hurtful”

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Andrew: “Oh, no! Are we doing this?”

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Andrew: “People really love you, man!”

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Andrew: Saying “And, the adventure begins again” in a sing-songy manner

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Andrew: Singing the first few notes of the “Night Court” theme

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Andrew: “This is definitely not it”

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Andrew: Whispering “That’s so much better. Why did I interrupt you?”

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Andrew: Whispering: “What!?”

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Andrew: “Yep! Yup! Paid seven dollars for the upgrade… never even played it again, Walsh. Go to your room”

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Andrew and Luke: Laughing

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Andrew and Luke: “You just like to go big… or… go to Hawaii (Yep; or, go home)”

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Luke: “Ashokan Means Hello and Goodbye”

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Luke: “Do you realize something, Andrew? Do you realize something!”

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Luke: Doing his version of the final notes of “Right Way to Rock”

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Luke: “How are you gonna fill… your tum-tum? And also, how are you gonna remind me to never use the word ‘tum-tum’ again; cuz, it’s… really troubling. Here’s my point”

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Luke: “I found those on Andrew a couple times too”

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Luke: “No S, Sherlock”

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Luke: “Oh my God!”

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Luke: “Oh, God! I always do that… Why do you have to steal my sunshine, Andrew?”

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Luke: Saying “Can I be on your broadcast?” in a nasally manner

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Luke: Saying “So now, she talks like this” in a gruff manner

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Luke: Saying “What’s this?” in a gruff manner

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Luke: Singing “Get back… honky cat”

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Luke: Sniffling

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Luke: “That’s all yuz do”

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Luke: “The Bay Kitty has been… all over tarnation”

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Luke: “Timely humor from ol’ L.B., everybody! Drink it in!”

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Luke: “Treat yourself… Treat yo self”

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Luke: “Usually, it’s your job to say the things that make me feel weird. Today, I’m doing it”

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Luke: “Want!”

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Luke: “We’re gonna roll out a new segment… (No shit, Sherlock) The, the segment is: No Bleep, Sherlock”

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Luke: “Which is how I knew you didn’t like me… cuz, you corrected me”

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Luke: Whispering “I swear, it smelled like B.O. and farts!”

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Luke: “You, you be nice to my friend Andrew… please”

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Luke and Andrew: “If you’re an on-the-go kind of person, and you want to keep… good nutrition… in your tum-tum. I did it again!! (God!)”

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Luke and Andrew: “Oh, God, I need to stop. I need to leave; (Goodbye) because, I’m… I’m making a mess of things”

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Madi Nelsen: “And… so, if Marion has the crazy cat room… my room is full of… the dorky… yeah, the dorky stuff”

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Madi Nelsen and Mari Nelsen: “Hi, Andrew (Hi)”

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Mari Nelsen: “And, I brush him… and brush him; and, then, all of a sudden… I just… and then, all of a sudden, his, his tail locked up, and I saw… worm, little worms crawling on his butt”

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Mari Nelsen: “TBTLs?”

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Mari Nelsen: “Well, for me… I’m kind of a crazy cat lady; because… my room… all it is is cats”

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Luke: “Clean as yo Mama’s… forehead”

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Luke: “Did you herniate anything?”

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Luke: “I assume you hate it… and me, by extension”

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Luke: “I don’t dance now, I make money moves… Say I don’t gotta dance, I make money move… If I see you and I don’t speak, that means I don’t eff with you. I’m a boss, you a worker. I make bloody moves”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: “Little B, you can’t eff with me if you wanted to. These expensive, these is red bottoms. These is bloody shoes. Hit the store, I can get ’em both. I don’t wanna choose. And I’m quick, cut a bleep off. So don’t get comfortable”

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Luke: Loudly whispering “I was just there!”

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Luke: “Oh… What!!!?! Are… you… shitting me?”

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Luke: “Ooh!”

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Luke: Saying “The Ninja” as Sofía Vergara”

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Luke: Singing “I make money move!”

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Luke: Singing “These blood shoes… this a-Dutch bible”

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Luke: “So, good news everybody. I survived”

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Luke: “The show that just… might… be… too… beautiful… to live (¡Jalapeña!)”

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Luke: “Wayne’s Attic! Party time! Broken products!”

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Luke: “What!?”

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Luke: “What!!!?!”

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Luke: “You’re on notice, Wayne’s Attic!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Cut up a couple of jack pops? (I mean…) Jack pops!? Jack pops (Yeah, sure)”

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Luke and Andrew: “He is coming to… us today, for the first time… from his new studios in the Roosevelt neighborhood of Seattle, Washington… (It’s working! It’s working!) and, amazingly, it is working. He is Andrew Walsh and he joins us now. Hello, my dude! Hello, Luke; and, congratulations… on surviving”

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Luke and Andrew: “I highly recommend ‘The Sixth Sense.’ It’s a popular movie for a good reason… and, I don’t wanna spoil anything for you; but, I just wanna tell you… the kid did not get hit by the Chinese space station. Oh, goddamnit, Luke. I was, seriously, it was… in my Netflix queue”

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Luke and Andrew: “I make money move! Boy, (Yeah) things just got white… fast! (Wow)”

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Luke and Andrew: “My dearest old setup… My dearest MO-2… That was just a joke for you and Erik the Engineer. Oh, (Erik the Viking) he stopped listening years ago. (Yeah) I think you know that”

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Luke and Andrew: “Wayne’s Attic! Party time! Broken products! Ec–not ex…cellent… Not… Anyway”

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Andrew: “Because, I just don’t want the show to end. I really missed ya, buddy”

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Andrew: “Because, we handle our business, man!”

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Andrew: “Clup-clup, clup-clup”

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Andrew: “Drive!”

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Andrew: “Forget about it! Forget it, Luke”

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Andrew: “I blew it! Capisce?”

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Andrew: “I don’t have to justify myself to you”

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Andrew: “I’m not trying to… start some shit or something”

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Andrew: “I’ve been busy with the move and getting pissed on… Umm… by a cat!!”

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Andrew: “It’s the 3rd of April! I still have a broken piece of junk! It’s not a piece of junk. I’m sorry I said that. It’s a sweet machine that just… happens to not work”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Listeners, we do not know yet… whether or not Luke has been crushed by space junk”

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Andrew: “My cat pissed all over me”

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Andrew: “No… shit, man!”

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Andrew: “Oh, goddamnit, Luke”

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Andrew: “Oh, I don’t know! I feel like I have told a lot of goddamn boring stories on the show today”

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Andrew: “Ohh! Ooh!”

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Andrew: Singing “I make money moves”

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Andrew: Singing “Taxman!”

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Andrew: “So, I was able to just, like, load the shit out of that thing”

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Andrew: “What!? Are you serious? I feel like I nailed it”

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Andrew: “What!? Where!?”

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Andrew: “What!? Where!?” #2

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Andrew: “Yeah, that sounds… clean as a fiddle”

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Andrew: “You know it, baby”

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Andrew and Luke: “I’m so, so excited about this new setup. Everything just makes so much more sense here. I love it! (Okay)”

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Andrew and Luke: Laughing with Andrew saying “Anyway”

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Andrew and Luke: “You know what? I’m on MarsupialGurgle.com right now, looking at our archives… and, you know what, I said, you know what I said was, ‘Only idiots will listen to this music’. That’s what, now it’s coming back to me (Yeah) (Ooooh!)”

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