Category: Audio Clips

Andrew: “Holy crap!!”

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Andrew: “Holy crap!! Quick aside! I need to tell somebody this!”

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Andrew: “I am clearly somebody, on record, who really enjoys my beverages”

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Andrew: “I give it a ding-ding. I like it”

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Andrew: “I mean, I hate that shit anyway”

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Andrew: “I’m entitled to it!”

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Andrew: “My brain went to wonderful places for ‘Fifty Shades of Polish'”

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Andrew: “Oh my God! Fifty Shades of Polish? Like, my brain kind of explodes”

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Andrew: “Society still frowns on making fun of nail salons”

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Andrew: “The only thing I’ve ever said with conviction on this show”

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Andrew and Luke: “Dance, Dance Resolution: We resolve to dance. Dance, Dance Resolution… Dance, Dance, Dance Resolution”

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Andrew and Luke: “Demi… Adejuyigbe… Uh, didja eBay. Uh, didja eBay [ph]“

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Beeping sound at the start of the Stu-bot’s voicemail message

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Luke: “Buy, buy, buy!”

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Luke: “Coming to you… from the Burbank Springs Broadcast Center… perched atop Alabama Hill. That’s my… Caribbean accent by way of Potawatomi”

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Luke: “Go Mariners. Go eat a Bortles… Go Seahawks. Go Browns”

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Luke: “Hawky grandmas be tripping, too?”

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Luke: “I was LOLing so hard”

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Luke: “I’m all the way up!”

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Luke: Making a beeping sound

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Luke: “Thanks a lot, WeWork!”

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Luke: “This is getting worse, not better”

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Luke: “We live in a very neighborhoody neighborhood”

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Luke and Andrew: “I’ve got to eat… some cold Mexican food; and, you have got… you gotta work on your ding-a-ling sling… I… You’re not the first person to tell me that”

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Andrew: “A minefield of embarrassment”

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Andrew: “Andrew Walsh had a pleasant conversation for several hours on a plane; even though, I am very anti-that”

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Andrew: “Hey… you sneaking around? Sounds like we gotta go to the bathroom”

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Andrew: “I guess I do have the Halloween spirit after all… It’s a Halloween miracle”

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Andrew: “I mean, I don’t do a lot of… sneaking around these days… I promise”

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Andrew: “I’m also very prudish”

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Andrew: “My body can shut down for days, sometimes, if I’m traveling”

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Andrew: “Papa Salty’s Seafood Machine”

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Andrew: “That’s not responsible runner’s butt… or whatever”

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Andrew: “The Something, Something Seafood Machine”

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Andrew: “Things that make you go poop”

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Andrew: “What did Rudy do?”

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Luke: “Again, I’m somebody who runs… and has the runs… As a runner… and, as a person who suffers occasionally from the runs”

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Luke: “Andrew, I’m sick today, okay? Will you please go easy on me?”

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Luke: “Booger McFarland’s Sideline Machine!”

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Luke: “Coming to you… not just from the Burbank Springs Broadcast Center, perched atop Alabama Hill in Bellingham, Washington; but, from the… Burbank Springs… Bedroom… Broadcast Center”

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Luke: “‘I cannot go to school today,’ Said little Peggy Ann McKay. ‘I have the measles and the mumps, A gash, a rash and purple bumps.'”

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Luke: “I’m sorry, Andrew, I don’t mean to be gross; and, then, we can move on”

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Luke: “I’m, I’m… snug as a bug in a rug here”

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Luke: “Listen, I’ve battled some, I’ve battled some demons… when it comes to bubble guts”

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Luke: “Runner’s trot… and… mud butt”

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Luke: Saying “Come to Potawatomi for… Reggae Tuesday!” in a Dracula-like accent

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Luke: “She doesn’t even know what to make of this whole thing. I’m sitting here… in my underwear… Sorry! Sorry for the visual, everybody”

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Luke: “Stop calling me Booger!”

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Luke: “This was a bad idea”

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Luke: “You didn’t have to donate; but, you did; but, you did; but, you did”

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Luke: “You gotta eat… one pound of these shit bears”

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Luke and Andrew: “This is some Encyclopedia Brown shit; and, by the way, I do mean… (Mmm) Encyclopedia Brown… shit… Mmm-kay, I’ll allow that”

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Luke and Andrew: “Well… it’s classic Andrew ‘Mud Butt’ Walsh. Yeah. Hey!”

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Andrew: “And, I had spent… some chunk of the afternoon… just smearing… duck shit directly into my hair”

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Andrew: “Are you kidding me? Are you still listening to this?”

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Andrew: “At least, not to my tongue”

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Andrew: “Do you wanna hear a really sad story about ducks?”

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Andrew: “Have you ever gotten that feeling; or, do you think I’m a nut boy?”

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Andrew: “How can this be?”

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Andrew: “How come every song is about… dogs getting sick!?”

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Andrew: “I can’t wait. I’m hungry now!”

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Andrew: “I don’t know. I don’t have a dog”

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Andrew: “I just killed it. I just stopped it there. I don’t even know if this is still the show or not”

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Andrew: “It creeps me out”

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Andrew: “It’s a cob, not a choice!”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Nothing worse than a slimy carrot”

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Andrew: “Oh, God! Yes!”

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Andrew: “Pre-packaged little carrot nubs”

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Andrew: “Rudy! Ru-dog”

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Andrew: “They’re actually baby corn! I am… I am… flummoxed!”

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Andrew: “We had ducks as a kid, too!”

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Andrew: “You know… don’t wanna brag”

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Andrew: “You won’t die, I promise”

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Andrew and Luke: “Dude, can I read something to you, from the Internet, that is (Please) blowing my brain?”

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Luke: “And, I keep… giving her… just to calm her down… Rudy, not Carey, that is”

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Luke: “And, so, she is not… happy with me”

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Luke: “Everything I know about cats, I learned from cartoons”

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Luke: “He derps forward by a foot”

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Luke: “I feel like she’s… she’s really Tiny Timming me right now; and, I’m scared”

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Luke: “I wish you could see… what’s happening here at the Burbank Springs Broadcast Center”

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Luke: “Rudy, don’t go in here! For the love of God”

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Luke: Saying “It’s not a tuber!” in a funny manner

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Luke: “That’s when you get into PB&J town”

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Luke: “This is where it happens… This cat is gonna be our mascot!”

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Luke: “What!?”

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Andrew: “Boy, we’re just going on some weird paths today”

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Andrew: “But, I… don’t know exactly… how I’m gonna get out of this jam. I guess you’re gotta tune in tomorrow”

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Andrew: “Look at this party animal!”

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Andrew: Making air horn sounds and saying “Remix!”

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Andrew: Quietly saying “Come here, Garfield. Come here”

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Andrew: Saying “It’s not a tumor” in a funny manner

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Andrew: “The cover of it looks like something that just got farted out of… like, MS Paint”

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Andrew: “This makes me want to watch this so bad!”

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Andrew: Whispering “I’m wearing socks in bed!”

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Andrew and Luke: “I miss (Dear God!) this all!”

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Andrew and Luke: “That would be, actually, very arty… And, weird. And, weird”

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Andrew and Luke: “This is the Hamster Dance song… I… am loving this”

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Luke: Doot-dooing the “Robin Hood” song

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Luke: “I don’t know why I have to weaponize everything”

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Luke: “If I was eating shit, I’m not grinning”

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Luke: “My house! My rules!”

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Luke: Saying “It’s not a tumor” in a funny Arnold Schwarzenegger-like manner

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Luke: Saying “It’s not a tumor” in a funny manner

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Luke: Saying “My name is Sue… How do you do?” in a funny, high-pitched voice

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Luke: Singing “Shake, shake, shake… shake, shake, shake… shake that hamster”

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Luke: Singing “That’s Robin Hood and Little John walking’ through the forest. Oo-de-lally, oo-de-lally, golly, what a day”

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Luke: “Well, I don’t care if they hear this”

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Luke and Andrew: “And, used… a sped-up hook from the Roger Miller song, ‘Whistle Stop’… (There you go. Look at the) ‘kay, that feels good… (golden ears on you!) That feels good to be validated”

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Luke and Andrew: “Do you have any other hamster stories you want to share with us before we wrap things up? Oh, do you wanna hear about our bad hamster? No, I’m just… kidding”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke saying “So, we’ll talk about that… and, whatever else pops into our little heads. Coming up in a moment. It’s TBTL. Don’t go anywhere” and Andrew snorting part way through

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Luke and Andrew: “Shit-eating grin is the grossest… (Yeah) It’s the gross–I’ve never understood the origin or why that would be… I can tell you one thing: if I was eating shit, I’m not grinning”

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Luke and Andrew: “Yeah. Because, you and I, share what’s called, ‘Stockholm Syndrome’ (Mmm-hmm)”

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