Marsupial Gurgle

Andrew: “Because, if you start petting that dog, like, bad things are gonna happen”

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Andrew: “First of all, what do you do to those people?!”

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Andrew: “I love a good pen!”

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Andrew: “I said, ‘Enough'”

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Andrew: “I’m looking at the inside of it now. Not the colon, the Smog Cutter.”

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Andrew: Laughing and saying “Where is the ‘Stop the Show’ sound effect? Oh my God! There is so much to unpack there!”

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Andrew: Snorting

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Andrew: “So, I did something that I think is a little bit Burbankian”

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Andrew: “There is no doubt in my head that if I, if I were rooting under different circumstances, that I could be a huge Green Bay fan… but, I’m not.”

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Andrew: “There were so many, so many words in that sentence that don’t seem to fit together”

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Andrew: “We don’t need you”

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Andrew: “Yeah, everybody’s paying for this”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew playing Guess That Sound with Luke

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Andrew and Luke: “Berets! Berets! I’m an idiot! (Yeah, yeah, yeah) Scratch everything I just said!”

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Andrew and Luke: “Can I give you two (Please) hot takes? Scald me.”

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Andrew and Luke: “I wore glasses as a baby! Really?! Forty years ago, thirty-eight years ago, I guess; cuz, I was two years old when I started wearing glasses.”

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Luke: “A real beret, brie and wine… type of situation”

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Luke: “Boy, this is… this is a deep-dive that nobody asked to take”

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Luke: Chuckling

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Luke: “Everybody, keep me in your prayers… my special pen very ill.”

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Luke: “I love this pen!”

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Luke: “If I never hear myself talking about how it felt for me to be near a famous person again, it’ll be too soon!”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: Luke wanted the donors that got a second thank you to retract the extra thank you or donate more money

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Luke: Making mouth sounds and saying “Put that in the glossary: what does it mean when Luke does that?”

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Luke: Making sounds with his squirrel call

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Luke: “Not my laser baldness helmet. That’s a totally different instrument for a different reason.”

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Luke: “Oh, man, it stunk, it stunk like a fart”

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Luke: “That’s right, it’s time to thank our, our damn donors of the day”

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Luke: “That’s right. I’m gonna wink at all the Hibou dogs and call it good for a Monday.”

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Luke: “Ugh, dad, you’re embarrassing me!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Do you have to? Do you have to? Let it linger? I did. (Do you have to?) I did, yes. I let it linger like a fart in the Smog Cutter. And… anyway. So…”

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Andrew: “Genevieve and I did our podcast on Tuesday and it was super loud, and it made me angry, and I shook me fists to the gods.”

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Andrew: “I always like to begin with the caveats”

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Andrew: “I get it, Luke, we’re gonna talk about you meeting Tom Hanks, okay? You don’t have to drop da Vinci Code and Burbs references all, all over the place.”

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Andrew: “I’m writing that down too. If not for a show title, just for my diary.”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Maybe me wagging my finger at you was not the right thing to do”

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Andrew: “No, it’s okay. I’m a bone collector.”

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Andrew: “Now, it’s all just David S. Pumpkins references all the time with you, isn’t it?”

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Andrew: “Oh, man! You’ve been saying everything wrong.”

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Andrew: “So, how did your webinar with Tom Hanks go last night?”

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Andrew: “Sounds like a Top Story to me”

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Andrew: “The Internet can’t decide, the people are going crazy; because, they can’t figure out if they put their two fingers together, if it looks like there’s a hot dog in between them!”

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Andrew: “What if we start a podcast about astronomy, and we begin it everyday with you saying, ‘That’s the planets, Stannets'”

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Andrew: “Wow. Wow.”

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Andrew and Luke: “How much time, I’m sweating here! He’s five minutes away. Okay.”

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Luke: “Burbankian”

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Luke: “Eh, that’s Hanks”

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Luke: “I’m not trying to deny my Bellingham roots everybody, okay? Bellinghamsters, don’t, don’t hate, congratulate.”

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Luke: “It happened, people. I met David S. Pumpkins last night.”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: Laughing #2

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Luke: “Mr. Tom S. Pumpkins”

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Luke: “My woife is here in the room, by the way”

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Luke: “Oh… my… God!”

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Luke: “Pastronomy”

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Luke: “Resting Hanks Face”

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Luke: “So, don’t steal our idea, Hanks!”

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Luke: “So, that’s the plan, Stans… and Stannetes? I don’t know the feminine of Stan, maybe there isn’t one.”

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Luke: “They carried a watermelon for you!”

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Luke: “With the intermittent fasting, I gotta figure out when, when was the last microphone that I ate; cuz, I gotta try to give it sixteen hours. Anyway… I gotta figure that out on my own time.”

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Luke: “You know, for… el perro loco y grande…”

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Luke and Andrew: “Did you drive here in your Kia Caveat? I did… Let me just give you the keys to the Caveat”

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Luke and Andrew: “Even in the Chase Bank… FredEx, Webinar Auditorium. Even at the TaxSlayer.com… Webinar Auditorium”

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Luke and Andrew: For some reason, Luke knows how to say “crazy dog” in every language

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Luke and Andrew: “I literally crossed the room and went and sat and just talked to Bill Kurtis about, about Pearl Harbor… as one does. The stripper!? Yep.”

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Luke and Andrew: “I mean, we’ve got Unsullied guarding (Sure) Sully. Oh, look at what I just did there. Oh, ho-ho-ho!”

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Luke and Andrew: Luke was close to letting “el perro grande” out

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Andrew: “And, it’s horrible! It is awful!”

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Andrew: Chuckling

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Andrew: “Everybody’s gotta push their heads all in together”

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Andrew: “I mean, I know this is… number one, probably pretty obvious; and, number two, sounding like a bit of an, just an old geezer”

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Andrew: “I think that’s the sound of APM’s lawyers blocking the segment”

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Andrew: “I’m just like a, a raccoon that grabs something shiny and can’t let go”

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Andrew: “I’m just shouting at clouds now”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: Laughing #2

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Andrew: “Nice, Luke.”

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Andrew: “Now that everything is selfie, selfie, selfie”

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Andrew: “Oh, good! You guys just wrote the newsletter for me.”

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Andrew: “Radios just, just happens in the air, man”

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Andrew: “Rock ‘n’ rollin’ and they’re catching it all on the drone cam!”

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Andrew: Saying “Uhh, means nothing to me” and does a fake cough

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Andrew: Singing “So, this is the ‘Drew year”

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Andrew: “So now, I like to go around and just poke my friends and see if they poke me back. I know… I hear it.”

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Andrew: “So, I don’t want their heads exploding right now”

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Andrew: “The words shouldn’t go together like that”

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Andrew: “This is interesting to one person, and it’s you”

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Andrew: “We’re screwed. America’s a garbage country.”

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Andrew: “You call that a wipe!?”

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Andrew: “You just got poked!”

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Andrew: “You know what, don’t do that. Don’t do that either, it’s, it’s just not that interesting.”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew has been dubbed “The Bone Collector”

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Andrew and Luke: “I kinda like, I’m kinda… Boy, I’m really on a… tear, aren’t I? You’re take is hot today, (Sorry) my friend. You’re take is scolding.”

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Andrew and Luke: “I might have tacos (Immaterial) It is immaterial. I might have spaghetti and meatballs.”

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Andrew and Luke: “You think I’ve been out of my mind the last two days, (Yeah) buckle up for tomorrow folks!”

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Luke: Apologizes for some slam poetry during the start of the intro

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Luke: “As per normal”

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Luke: “Awww”

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Luke: “Drones are very unpopular with a certain kind of white person”

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Luke: “He’s been spotted recently in the tall grass, doing his stuff”

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Luke: “How do you say ‘bababooey’ in Norse?”

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Luke: Singing “So, this is the new ‘Drew”

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Luke: Singing “So, this is the new year”

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Luke: Singing “So, this is the news quiz”

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Luke: “Stop being such a Philip K. Dick!”

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Luke: “Tell ’em The Bone Collector sent ya!”

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Luke: “That, that camel got its nose under the tent”

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Luke: “The Hanks-uation”

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Luke and Andrew: Andrew was thinking about lowering Luke’s level after saying “bunghole” and “stinky basement”

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Luke and Andrew: “Better ingredients. Better pizza. Fewer (worst) causes. Yes!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Do they have a Norwegian Wack Pack? The Norwegian Wack Pack!”

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Luke and Andrew: “I mean that, they were scatting and it also was shit. Yes! And, it was logical shit.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Okay, I’m gonna give you my Earl Gray twenty-two minutes (Nice!) take… Add that to the glossary.”

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Andrew: “And, this is where, maybe, it will be hurt, hurt feelings town”

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Andrew: Chuckling

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Andrew: “Dolphinately, my friends”

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Andrew: Drawn out “Probably”

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Andrew: “Genevieve’s got a whole bunch of bottles of stuff going on. I got my own bottles of stuff going on.”

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Andrew: “Grab your Ringers and let’s go pull some tabs!”

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Andrew: “How does Carey feel about all these… things you do?”

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Andrew: “I lay down in, I lay down in the tall grass and I clean my tongue. What?”

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Andrew: “I spent Monday night cleaning the living hell out of my bathroom, and I’m gonna keep singing; because, it is so clean now.”

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Andrew: “I would like to re-iterate, that was when I was like twe–nineteen, twenty year old, jerk-face Andrew. I may be more open to it now.”

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Andrew: Laughing

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Andrew: “Neither of which are probably great for the environment”

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Andrew: “Oh God, at least! Yeah!”

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Andrew: “Oh, shoot!”

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Andrew: Singing “Let me clean my tongue”

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Andrew: “That’s not where the money goes!”

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Andrew: “The uncanny hell valley”

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Andrew: “What, are you gonna mumble that song?”

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Andrew: “Where does the time go?”

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Andrew: “You’re gonna paint a picture that I will not be able to unsee, right?”

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Andrew and Luke: Andrew is seeing if he can take his microphone into his bathroom

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Andrew and Luke: It takes Andrew a couple of hours to clean his bathroom right

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Andrew and Luke: Steve Nelson is the Saint of Lost Causes

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Luke: “And then, it’s Snore Town USA”

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Luke: “Do me a favor. Do me a kindness.”

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Luke: “Goddamn it, I’m hungry!”

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Luke: “He is known primarily for his drawing of tall ships. He’s the Hodor of podcasting, and you cannot overstate his whip appeal.”

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Luke: “Holy shit, man!”

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Luke: “Really?”

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Luke: Saying “Okay” in a funny manner

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Luke: Saying “People always see me–ask me, ‘Hey, George! What should I do with my invention?'” as George Foreman

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Luke: “She was listening to TBTL. So, anyway… goodbye universe.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Bidets for everyone? (You get a bidet!) Bidets for days?”

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Luke and Andrew: “Nora is a small Filipino woman, who sits at the side of your bed with a stick. With a fly swatter… whacks you on the side of your face when you snore”

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Luke and Andrew: “You know, I thought you were gonna actually share some useful information. This is why I’m not allowed to talk to children, anymore. I just lie to them all the time.”

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Andrew: “But, now I’m confused! Oh, okay. I’m not confused. Never mind.”

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Andrew: “Can we just get done with this show?”

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Andrew: “Damn, Daniel Bagley!”

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Andrew: “Damn, Paul Daniels!”

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Andrew: “Do the Germans have a word for the feeling when a tiny screw strips itself, or any screw strips itself out on you?”

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Andrew: “Everybody’s got their bugaboos, right?”

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Andrew: “Hey boss, I can’t come in today. Another stripped screw? Yeah.”

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Andrew: “I didn’t feel as stupid as I usually do”

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Andrew: Imitating his laptop’s fan sound

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Andrew: “It’s just gonna say ‘TBD’. And, when you hit play, it’s just gonna play the hilarious world of depression.”

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Andrew: “Let’s play their game then, Luke!”

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Andrew: “Play… the Red Shoe Diaries”

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Andrew: “Satan?”

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Andrew: “Technology is killing me… in every, in every way”

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Andrew: “This is gonna ruin all the podcasts!”

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Andrew: “Tomorrow, I’m gonna be so goddamn funny… you have no idea. I’m gonna be so on point tomorrow, it’s gonna make you puke.”

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Andrew: “Trust me. If I don’t wanna get into it… it’s not worth getting into”

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Andrew: “USA: Up Most of the Night!”

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Andrew: “Well now, the fan in it is loud as heck”

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Andrew: “Yeah, that’s dumb”

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Andrew and Luke: “Can we start over again? Of the whole show? Remember we did that last week and we were really glad we did?”

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Andrew and Luke: “Hey man… stuff’s done. I’m-a ready to do a show now. You just… almost made me do a spit take”

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Andrew and Luke: “Ma jeunesse fout le camp? That sounds like it.”

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Andrew and Luke: “Son of a… jerk face. Wait a second, Andrew. What?”

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Andrew and Luke: “You ever do that thing where there’s a bunch of paper sitting on the table, and, and then you eat it; and then, you later find out that it was acid? Mmm-hmm. That’s how I started my day today.”

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Luke: “#GiveMeABrark”

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Luke: “But, if you want misinformation about the band Fleetwood Mac, you have landed in exactly the right place”

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Luke: “By the way, I just had my mind blown”

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Luke: “Carey came home from the chiropractor today, and… she’s leaving me. But, he’s a very handsome man, and… I’ve been to his website and I can’t argue.”

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Luke: Cute Laugh

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Luke: “God, memories are so weird!”

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Luke: “I’m not being sarcastic, Andrew. Do you need a moment?”

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Luke: “Is there any chance that some kind of chicanery is afoot with you having it out with your neighbor; who, knows which car you drive, and then, you come out and your battery’s dead?”

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Luke: “It is a desperate cry for media attention; which, we will provide for them”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: Laughing #2

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Luke: “Let’s just rip the band-aid off this one”

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Luke: “Mmm–chopping broccolie [ph]“

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Luke: “Oh my God”

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Luke: “Rudy dog, one. Pod-host Burbank, zero.”

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Luke: Singing “Shorty”

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Luke: “When I found him today, he was in the tall grass doing… what could only be described as… his stuff”

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Luke: “Which is why we have to thank our, ‘Damn, donors!’ level donors of the day”

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Luke and Andrew: “I don’t fully trust you not to huff that. Right; and, that’s fair. And, that’s fair.”

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Luke and Andrew: “Isn’t that special? (Oh, God!)”

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Luke and Andrew: “There’s got to be some gold in them thar hills (Mmm-hmm)”

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Luke and Andrew: “This might be a perfect time tomorrow to just turn the show over to Linh Pham. Yeah, that’s not a bad idea. Linh, (He’s) take it away. He’s actually producing more content related to the show these days than we are; so… Absolutely true! And, yet, the listeners, Andrew, continue to support this show.”

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Luke: “Again, I would just say to anyone, who’s listening to this show, who is… Mariah Carey, have a backup plan”

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Luke: “And, I just want to clarify one thing here at the top of the show”

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Luke: “And, you, on the other hand, Andrew, you make loving fun”

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Luke: “By the way, you’re all welcome that I’m not doing this in Yakov Smirnoff accent”

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Luke: Chuckling

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Luke: Chuckling #2

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Luke: “Damn, Andrew. Back at it again with the Austin Powers references.”

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Luke: “I don’t think my wife has gone number two… since the 1980s.”

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Luke: “I, I don’t want to go full No Point on it”

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Luke: “I, I flipped her. I broke her.”

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Luke: “If you want to clean up the backyard or the front yard”

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Luke: “It blew my mind”

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Luke: “It was time for it to go; but, now that it’s gone… I realize that there’s a lot of dog poop that was under that snow”

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Luke: “It was… peak Clapper”

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Luke: Laughing

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Luke: Laughing #2

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Luke: Laughing #3

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Luke: “Radical, dude!”

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Luke: Singing “You got me feelin’ emotion”

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Luke: Singing “You got me feelin'”

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Luke: Singing a portion of “Roundball Rock”

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Luke: “Speaking of… you know, number two and things like that”

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Luke: “That is, that may not be the most bueno way to learn this”

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Luke: “There will be some scatology-free parts of the show, it’ll just be at the very end of the program”

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Luke: “This show can only handle one gross person”

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Luke: “Trigger alert”

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Luke: Whispering “It was amazing!”

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Luke and Andrew: “Andrew, this is their fight song (Sorry)”

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Luke and Andrew: Classic MAWAMAWA Situation

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Luke and Andrew: “‘Damn, donors!’ of the day (That’s pretty good, man!)”

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Luke and Andrew: “Don’t you think a bidet is so more civilized than what we’re doing? No.”

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Luke and Andrew: “So, all I want to say to take it back to Toilet Town, for a minute… Take it back to Toilet Town”

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Luke and Andrew: “We’re thanking our Ghetto Boys ‘My Damn My Mind is Playing Tricks on Me’ Daniel (Hmm?) level donors of the day. Oh-ho-ho-ho, I forgot!”

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